Andrew Lister knew from a very young age that he was different from everyone around him, ever since he started to hear from some of his relatives that he "didn't look completely like a boy" or that he seemed "too feminine" compared to his older brothers. At the time he didn't pay much attention, preferring to focus on reading and learning new things that caught his interest, but everything changed the year he turned 13.
He still remembers to this day. How confused and scared he felt at the time. It all started when he was taking off his clothes while his valet at that time was downstairs getting more water for his bath. From the corner of his eyes he caught himself in the mirror and saw something that seemed out of place. He got closer and noticed that his chest looked… bigger, but not in the way according to the development of a boy. It looked more like breasts. He knew because he recently has been interested in the development of the human body and had gotten a couple of books about anatomy. Obviously nobody knew about this except for him.
He started to feel dizzy all of a sudden, trying to come up with, and failing miserably, a reasonable explanation for the current events. That's when he heard the faint but familiar footsteps of his valet coming down de hall. In his panic for the sudden discovery he hastily threw on his night shirt before his valet opened the door carrying the rest of the water. Andrew rapidly told him to just leave it beside the tub and leave him to bathe himself. His valet, a little confused, followed his orders and left him alone after making sure everything was in place and his employer didn't need anything else.
After the door was closed he removed his clothes fast and looked at himself in the mirror again. Yes, he wasn't imagining things, they definitely looked a little like breasts. Getting more confused he didn't know what to do. He couldn't remember reading in any of his books about something like this, he couldn't make sense of it and it was driving him crazy. He kept starring at himself for a couple of minutes and tried to calm himself, knowing that he had other things to do he set to work and decided that he will look for more information in his books and come up with a logical explanation, instead of just standing there panicking.
As the days passed that week he was getting more confused and desperate. None of the books he possessed were giving him information on what was happening and to make matters more complicated his chest was looking more and more like breasts with each passing day. Also some of his features were becoming a little "too feminine" for a boy, well, more that usual. He was becoming paranoid and insecure, not knowing what was happening. He was not someone who liked to be in the unknown. This wasn't normal. By the end of the week he started to bind his chest to try and disguise his atypical anatomy, which was his more noticeable change. He started to refuse help from his valet while dressing and became more wary towards anyone who got too close to him.
This behavior, from his family, was seen as something normal that a teenager does at that age. Meanwhile he was trying desperately to find an explanation, and getting none. The weeks became months and the months years and by the time Andrew turn 15 the "new behavior" became something common for everyone, nobody question it or him.
That is, until his family visited his uncle and aunt at Shibden Hall.
Andrew had always had some kind of special bond with his aunt Anne, so much that he liked to think that his name was given to him to show some kind of respect to her in some way or that if he would have been born a female she would have had the same name.
His mother wasn't a bad woman or anything of the sort, but he always felt that he wasn't "good enough" for her or couldn't understand him in the way he wanted to and with her passing two years prior he would never get the chance to. His father most of the time was occupied with other things, though he would always make sure that nothing was wrong with his family… and his sister, well, they got along fine and would do anything for each other, should the need arise, but their interests just weren't the same and clashed more often than not.
But with his aunt, oh his dear aunt, it was from the first moment he could remember that he felt some sort of connection to her, some deeper understanding just between the two of them. And that's how young Andrew, one evening when they were sure nobody was around, confessed to her his predicament. Hoping and praying to God that she wouldn't expose him and would help him find answers.
And he wasn't disappointed.
His aunt took the information rather well, considering the bizarre circumstances, and promised him that she would do anything in her power to help him, but being a woman in the kind of society that they lived she couldn't do much alone without drawing unwanted attention. So, after some convincing and reassurance to his nephew, that same day she sat down with his brother and had a long conversation.
Jeremy Lister wasn't so… gentle, in taking in the situation, but after hearing all that his sister had to say he concluded that he would also would do everything he could to help his son. The following week the trio, very discreetly, incurred around Halifax to look for a doctor who could help them, but soon realized that it wouldn't be that easy. No doctor they consulted could give them answers or could understand what they were talking about. The Lister clan, not wanting to give too many details to some stranger who they couldn't implicitly confide in, stopped their search for the moment. But one of the doctors suggested them that maybe, if they were able and willing to make the travel, they could find a doctor with the answers they needed in Paris.
Given new hope the Lister clan soon decided that they would travel as soon as possible, but aunt Anne would stay in Halifax and his nephew would write to her as soon as his father and him got answers. Of course, Marian couldn't stay at home with the servants all by herself so she traveled with them, much to de complain of Andrew.
The new trio arrived at Paris and was welcomed by a couple that were friends of Jeremy, who offered them to stay with them, which they gladly accepted. That night when the kids and the wife turned in to sleep the couple of old friends stayed by the fire to catch up on some matters. Eventually the subject for which the Lister family was here was brought up. Jeremy without giving much details told him that he was in need of a doctor, specialized in anatomy. His reasoning was that a relative was in need of one but couldn't make the trip himself, so he offered to do it.
His friend without suspecting anything suggested him a Dr. Jacob Reine, who was making some big break throughs in his field right now and could give him his information to contact him. The next day Jeremy and Andrew sat to talk about the doctor and his father wrote him a letter explaining a little about the "predicament" with his son. After it was sent the family had no other option but to wait for a response. Marian wanted to look around the city and father and son couldn't find a way to deny her so the Lister clan spend the rest of the day visiting all kind of places in the city.
The next day around breakfast they received a letter addressed to Jeremy Lister. He was quick to deduce that could be from the doctor, which indeed was. In his response he stated that he was very intrigued and curious for the case of this particular boy and would like to meet with them that same evening if possible. Jeremy without missing a bit, and after a confirmation from his son, replied and by 3 o'clock father and son were meeting with the doctor.
The doctor greeted them friendly and took them to his office so they could talk in private. Andrew was who talked the most of course, given he was the one who explained what he was feeling and experimenting over the past years. The doctor listened to every detail and at the end of Andrew's explanation he asked if he would be okay with showing him. Andrew at first was embarrassed and reluctant but after some encouragement from the doctor and his father he agreed.
Dr. Reine was completely professional and careful with the young person that he was examining. After he finished and Andrew dressed himself again, he prepared himself to share with them the conclusion that he had reached. He explained to them that his "condition", talking from a medical perspective, was something very uncommon but not unheard of. He personally hadn't encountered a person with the same condition as Andrew but he has heard from other doctors around the continent who have treated these individuals.
After the initial shock from the Listers the doctor continued explaining that these individuals were characterized for having both female and male features but every person was different. In Andrew's case, given he had male genitalia but was showing some female features such as the growth of the breasts indicated that he could have been more of a female than a male at the time he was born but was considered a male for his reproductive organs. Now that he was in his puberty his body was making the changes of both a male and female body. This alarmed both Listers and the doctor tried to reassured them that the young man could still live a normal live, such as has been demonstrated with other cases, just being careful.
For the rest of the evening Dr. Reine tried to explained everything he could and respond as much questions as possible. At the end of the day Jeremy and Andrew were exhausted and confused but got the answers they were looking for. Andrew was worried that after everything they heard his father would disown him, Was "he" even a he at this point…or ever?, Would think him a freak?, Something queer?, Would he no longer be his heir?. This and many more questions were going thru his head.
Something in his face must have shown because next thing he knew his father was embracing him in a tight hug in the middle of the street.
His father was never a very affectionate man but he showed him and his sister that he cared for them and now here he was, telling him in a hushed tone that he was his child, and no one and nothing, would ever change that. Andrew felt himself wanting to cry, but he didn't. He had a reputation to uphold.
That night as he was prying before turning in for bed he concluded that God had given him this nature for a reason, a purpose, a chance. He remembered what the doctor said that maybe he was a she. Maybe God knew that a spirit as strongly and passionate as his would feel utterly trapped in the current circumstances a woman had to live in. Yes, God have given him the opportunity to be more, to do more. Not just be trapped by society and their standards, their expectations for women. He would embrace his opportunity, his gift, with all his might, he wouldn't be ashamed of who or what he was and he would be the best person that he could be. He wouldn't make the same mistake that society did.
His future wife would be loved, would want for nothing, but most of all would be respected. She would be someone who would stand beside him not behind him. She would be his companion for life before God, his other half, his most trusted confident.
That night as Andrew Lister drifted off to sleep he started to plan for his future wife and their future together.
Little did he know he would be with various women, experience numerous heartbreaks and several years would pass before the one appeared before him.