A/N: Hey guys this is an angsty story and some parts definitely get dark but there is also some really fluffy parts and it all turns out good in the end.

Disclaimer : Obviously I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters

Keep calm and Drarry on

Chapter One: The Winning of the War

Harry had never felt so loved in his life it was like a reprieve from his life an escape an oasis in the dessert. But there was always something that stopped Harry form going further with Ginny. She loved him he knew that but there was always an empty feeling in his chest like he wanted to love her with his whole being but couldn't and as the days wore on the hole in his chest grew. Breaking up for her safety had just seemed like the best option at the time. Harry wasn't sure why he felt weightless and he almost felt guilty that the weight on his shoulders, the responsibility to love Ginny back, had lifted.

The war had ended much as everyone recounted. Though Harry thought the stories never quite told of the true horror of the war not just the stench of death or the fear for your life but the small things. The loss which you couldn't quite feel, the emotion that you couldn't quite show. There was no time for love or hate or remorse or guilt. There were just them and the death eaters.

Harry returned to the great hall after the death eaters had all been rounded up. He saw his best friend Ron with his arms around their bushy haired friend Hermione. Seeing that they were both relatively unharmed filled him with relief. They were two of the single most important people. Guiltily he looked around for Ginny; he hadn't even bothered to look out for her and knew she would expect him to go to her for comfort now that the danger of the war was over. The thought of wrapping Ginny up in his arms just no longer held the appeal that it used to.

"Harry we did it." An excited Neville bound up to him, his arms around Luna's shoulders. They were both covered in soot and dirt and had a few cuts on their arms and faces but otherwise they were both unharmed.

"Yeah Nev, it's over now." Harry patted his friend on the shoulder and watched as the couple walked away.

Harry made his way towards his two friends feelings oddly empty. The death of Voldemort which should have filled him with joy just left him feelings oddly out of place, as if he was no longer needed by the people around him.

"Hey Harry what are you doing to do now the war is over, I was thinking of spending the holidays traveling to Australia with Hermione to get her parents and we should be back for start of semester next year." Ron was talking enthusiastically as Hermione blushed on his lap.

"Yeah I was just thinking of laying low mate. You know staying away from the reporters." Harry was truly happy for his friends but their love made him feel very much like the third wheel of the Golden Tricycle.

"We you are welcome to come with us Harry." Hermione voiced.

"He bloody well is not. I want to spend time with you 'Mione. Harry will be fine without us. He has Ginny right Harry." Ron looked towards him obviously not wanting Harry to join their private vacation.

"Of course. I will be fine. We will see each other at the Burrow when you get back." Harry tried to sound as encouraging as he could. He did reply to Ron's not-so-subtle hint about Ginny.

In the weeks following the final battle Harry, Ron and Hermione were swamped by reporters wanting a firsthand account of what happened in the months leading up to and their first-hand account of the final battle. Harry had told the reporter time and time again he wouldn't have made it through any of it without his two best friends. All three of the trio conveniently forgot to mention Ron's brief stint away.

Each reporter had their own ideas about what the three were up to form researching the dark arts to amassing an army. Each reporter also had something to say about the group dynamics many commenting of the obvious relationship between Ron and Hermione and how Harry must feel about his third wheel status.

Harry managed to laugh them off as at the time he hadn't felt like that at all. They had been a team Harry, Ron and Hermione. But now he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy that they were so openly in love. Harry knew he could get back with Ginny but he just couldn't bring himself to want her anymore. It was so hard to explain. The time away from her away from everyone with just his best friends made Harry realize that maybe she wasn't as important as he thought. He like that she saw past his fame and really saw him but even now Ginny seemed star struck and fawned over him. Yes he had seen some bad things in the war and yes he still had nightmares about the moment he died in the forbidden forest but he wasn't a hero, he didn't need to be mothered and he definitely didn't need to be called the 'Chosen One'. The war had changed everyone and not always for the better.

Fred was gone and all Ginny wanted to do was talk about how much she missed him. She couldn't see how much Harry felt responsible for his absence from her life.

It was a month after the battle and after helping McGonagall repair the castle Ron and Hermione had apparated to Australia to find her parents. Harry walked up the path to the burrow alone, he had nowhere else to go and the Burrow had always felt like home.

"Oh Harry dear come in has Ron and Hermione left already?" Mrs. Weasley bustled around her cramped kitchen preparing the evening meal for her broken family. The month after the war had been hard but the Weasley's were tough and they tried to stay positive through everything even though they each were dealing with the loss of a son, a brother. Harry admired their spirit and it was this sense of warmth and home after everything he had put them through, and they had been through a lot, that made the Burrow and the Weasley's home. He had never felt at home anywhere but Hogwarts and he couldn't stay there forever even though McGonagall hinting at him teaching Defense.

"Yes Mrs. Weasley they left just now. Hermione says that they send their love and they will be back before start of semester now that it is definite that they are letting us repeat 7th year."

"Oh dear do call me Molly we are far past formalities honey." Mrs. Weasley smiled warmly.

It was at that moment that George, Ginny, Charlie, Bill, Fleur and Percy all trudged into the kitchen obviously expecting Dinner.

"Oh Harry your back," George clapped him on the shoulder. He had not been up to going back to Hogwarts and would be returning with Percy to the joke shop. He had already talked to Harry about more defense jokes that he wanted to work on together.

"Good to see that the castle is back in one peace. Ron and Hermione off then?" Charlie sat in the seat next to Harry's.

"Yeah, I was saying they left just now." Charlie seemed to understand Harry's lack of relationship with Ginny and had spent most of the month keenly observant and at times quite helpful.

Dinner was a loud affair as always, the volume had not decreased since Fred's death if anything the rest of the Weasley's filled the silence where his voice would have rung.

It was later that night that Ginny came into the room that Harry usually shared with Ron. "Hey Harry. I think we need to talk?" Ginny sat down on the bed next to him where he had been staring sightlessly out the attic window.

"Yeah Gin. We do." Was his tired reply.

"It's not that I don't care about you Harry but the war and the time apart made me realize that maybe we didn't give ourselves time to grow up before we started dating. I know I thought I was grown up, I had dated other guys and you had dated other girls and I thought that I was mature enough to stand beside you but I guess the war made me realize or maybe it changed me but I don't know who I am anymore and I don't want to hurt you Harry but I'm not sure that we should be together. I am not sure who we are now work together. You will always be my friend Harry, my brother just not my boyfriend." Ginny rambled and weight lifted form Harry, it was like music to his ears, she wasn't going to cry and be upset she was going to break up with him and move on with her life.

"I think I knew this was coming, the war changed a lot of thing Gin and I am glad that we still have our friendship because that mean a lot to me." Harry put his arm around her letting her know he still cared for her, like the sister that she was.

"Thanks Harry. I best get to bed before mum finds me," And with that Ginny scurried out of the attic bedroom.