Hey all, I didn't want to make you wait so here is the new part to the twin series, special thanks goes out to Kelzone07 for her ideas and helping me get more ideas for the story.
Song: Letter to my daughter- Kerri Brown.
Have I told you lately—Rod Stewart.
Flashback:
'' She is coding!''
Santana stands frozen outside of the operation room hearing Dr Brown yell out orders and closes her eyes as her world starts spinning, she slowly turns on her heels and walks towards the waiting room next door.
'' Santanita?'' Mario asks noticing his daughter first, he jumps up as he sees the tears in her eyes and walks over catching her as she falls into his arms.
'' Papi.'' She chokes out sobbing.
'' What happened?'' He asks concerned pulling her close as he feels her body shake with sobs.
'' S-she c-coded.'' Santana croaks out breaking down, Mario closes his eyes as he hears everyone behind him choke out loud sobs and pulls his daughter closer as her legs give out.
Santana buries her face in her dads chest as he sits down pulling her in his lap and shakes her head. '' Why? Why her?''
'' I don't know mija.''
'' She was healthy and had no problems at all, why did she suddenly start having problems? She didn't stress and made sure she always relaxed, I don't understand.'' She cries out, close to hyperventilating.
'' You need to breath mija.'' Mario mumbles rubbing her back as he hears her pant, Santana shakes her head and sobs.
'' C-can't.''
Maribel jumps up hearing her daughter gasp for breath and calls for a nurse, she crouches down in front of her daughter after ordering the nurse to grab a paper bag. She turns her in Mario's hold cupping her cheek and grabs the bag as the nurse runs in handing her one, she holds it up for her daughter and locks eyes on broken brown orbs. '' Breath slowly mija.''
She mumbles voice filled with tears and angst not knowing how her daughter in law is doing, she helps her adjust the hold on her bag and rubs her legs as she slowly breaths into the bag. '' Just like that, calm down Santanita.''
'' Santana?''
Santana's head snaps up as she hears Dr Brown's voice and she immediately jumps up, Mario follows her lead grabbing her hips as she loses balance and kisses her head. '' Easy mija.''
'' How are they?'' Santana asks looking at Dr Brown ignoring her dad, Dr Brown wipes away a drop of sweat and forces a small smile.
'' Your daughter is okay, she is really small but the neonatal unit is taking care of her.''
'' And my wife?'' Santana croaks out
'' Your wife will be fine, she will be moved down to a big room soon so you all can sit with her. I am sorry for scaring you like that and I didn't expect her to code at all, her blood pressure is back to normal but due to the stress her body just turned off for a few minutes.''
'' She will be okay?'' Santana asks relief filling her voice as she leans against her dad, Dr Brown nods her head and smiles.
'' They will both be perfectly fine.''
Santana tackles her in a hug sobbing and wraps her arms around her shoulders. '' Thank you!'' She mumbles over and over again, Dr Brown smiles hugging her back and pats her back.
'' Just doing my job Santana, come on I will bring you all to Brittany's room.''
End of flashback.
One year later, two nights before Christmas.
Thinking... Breathing... feeling
Slow down time because it flies so fast
I'm trying to absorb the seconds while they last
Your scent, your smile the twinkle in your eye
All the firsts every low and every high
Catching tears when I'm looking at your face
You are the best part of me, you are my saving grace
And so I wish for you my love
Santana gulps leaning against the doorway watching her wife sit in the rocking chair singing to their daughter after they tucked their boys in and wipes away her tears softly sniffling as she sees their one year old little girl slowly fall asleep safely tucked into her mothers arm.
I want you to feel loved
Want you to be free
Want you to be anything you dream you can be
Want you to have pride
Be humble in between
Don't blend into the crowd if you want to be seen
I want you to love
With your entire heart
Finish everything that you start
Want you to be still
As sweet as you are now
Even when your fears try to bring you down
I want you
Brittany turns her head as she hears a sniffle and kisses her daughters head as she sees her wife leaning against the doorpost watching them with a loving smile. '' Look who's here baby girl.''
Santana smiles as she watches their daughters tired blue eyes flutter open and walks towards them as she reaches for her, she takes her from her wife after wiping away her tears and kisses her head. '' Ready for bed mija?''
She holds her close smelling her hair as she snuggles into her yawning cutely and closes her eyes letting the smell of love surround her. She kisses her head again as she feels Brittany join them wrapping her arms around the both of them and nuzzles her face in her chest swallowing the lump she feels in her throat away. '' Te amo.'' She mutters voice cracking at the end.
Brittany frowns hearing the emotion in her wife's voice and drops a kiss on her head. '' We love you too baby.'' She takes their little girl from her and places her down in her crib, she tucks her in smiling as she immediately grabs onto the little lion Quinn gave her and turns on the baby monitor.
She intertwines her hand with Santana's and slowly leads her out of the room after they both whispered good night, she walks down the stairs pulling Santana with her and drops down on the couch. '' What's wrong baby?'' She asks frowning in concern.
Santana cuddles into her sniffling and shrugs. '' It's stupid.'' Brittany sighs and cups her jaw pulling her head up so they can lock eyes.
'' Hey I don't want to hear you call what you are feeling stupid, please talk to me San.''
Santana gulps tears filling her eyes once again and turns her head nuzzling her face in Britt's shoulder. '' It's close to Val's first birthday, the nightmares started up again.'' She mumbles keeping her face hidden in her wife's shoulder as tears slide down her cheeks, Brittany sighs sadly moving them so they are laying down on the couch and pulls her wife on top of her running her hands up her back under her shirt as she feels tears soaking the top she wears.
She kisses the top of her head pulling her impossibly closer as she feels a sob wrack through San's body and trails her fingers up her spine. '' We are right here with you my love, I can only imagine how you felt and wish you would have never had to experience that.'' She cups her jaw slowly pulling her head up pouting as her wife sniffles and pecks her on the lips ignoring the saltiness and wetness of her tears on her lip, she pulls back kissing the tip of her nose and leans their foreheads together locking eyes on tear filled brown orbs. '' I love you Santana and I can't thank you enough for the strength you gave after giving birth to Valerie, without you I would have never trusted myself to hold our daughter when she was that little and even though we both struggled with what happened but you pushed away your own fears to support me.''
'' Our sisters pulled me through whenever I was home for a few hours to shower and grab clothes.'' Santana mutters sniffling, Brittany smiles and nods her head running her thumb along her jawline.
'' I know but you pulled me through it my love, you talked me through my fears and every time I saw you sitting in the NICU holding our little girl on your naked chest so she felt your closure made my heart burst with so much love. It was a tragic experience babe but she is here, happy and healthy, we have our three little wonders one floor above us in their room fast asleep.''
She wipes away Santana's tears and kisses her softly. '' I won't tell you to not dwell on the past because I feel the same but knowing our three kids are with us healthy and happy calms me down a bit, but please never think that you are alone okay? I am here for you no matter what time it is and I know you don't want to wake me because Val still wakes up in the middle of the night sometimes, but if you have a nightmare please wake me up so that we can talk I don't want you to try to get over this alone San.'' She cups her jaw as she sees silent tears run down her cheek and kisses the tip of her nose. '' We are in this together babe and we will also overcome this feeling, it will hurt this year but it will lessen next year because we will watch our little girl grow and get stronger everyday that passes.''
Santana nods her head nuzzling her face in Britt's neck after kissing her cheek and sniffles. '' I promise to wake you whenever I have a nightmare, mi amor.'' She sighs softly wiping away her tears and bites her lip. '' Sorry for being such a mess.''
Brittany shakes her head hugging her close and kisses the top of her head as she buries herself in her hold, she reaches for the blanket they keep on the back of the couch and throws it over them rubbing her hands over her back under San's shirt. '' No need to apologize baby, I would've been more concerned if you acted like you are happy. I am glad you are letting me in and we can talk about this, I don't want us to try to work past this on our own because that will put a strain on our relationship.''
'' I don't want that either.'' Santana whispers sliding her hand under Britt's top placing her palm right over her heart, she closes her eyes carefully laying her head on Britt's chest knowing her breast are still a bit sore and sighs contently as she hears the steady thump of her heart.
Brittany smiles sadly knowing why her wife nuzzles her face in her chest and runs her fingers through dark locks clearing her throat softly.
Have I told you lately that I love you?
Have I told you there's no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles, that's what you do
She kisses the top of her head as she feels her relax knowing she will fall asleep any second and closes her eyes humming soothingly.
For the morning sun and all it's glory
Greets the day with hope and comfort too
You fill my life with laughter and somehow you make it better
Ease my troubles, that's what you do
She smiles as she feels her sigh contently completely relaxing against her and pulls the blanket up their bodies, she wraps her arms around San's shoulder and sighs softly. '' I love you San.''