Author's Note: This is the oldest story of the ones I am publishing, and I have mixed feelings about it. I've just gone back and edited it for grammatical errors and minor inconsistencies. The plot remains the same, so if you've read it before, there's probably no need to read the latest update. I've added chapter titles and changed some of the formatting a little. All feedback is welcome.
Darkness and Light
Chapter 1: Something is About to Happen
The starship Voyager glided through space. Empty blackness surrounded it. Small, bright specks of light seemed far away. The stars surrounding Voyager gleamed with a harsh, clear light, inviting both speculation and exploration. One might be a cold, dry planet; a hostile tundra where little could survive. Another might be a lush, jungle world permeated with green, blue and purple flora and fauna, or a forest world where many animals coexisted, feeding off the land and off each other. Who were the inhabitants of these many worlds? Were they hostile or friendly? Allies or enemies? In what state of technological advancement were their societies? What kinds of governments did they employ? How would they respond to first contact from an alien race from halfway across the galaxy?
These were the thoughts that flitted through the mind of Captain Kathryn Janeway as she sat in her chair on the bridge of her ship, watching the black space and the glittering stars fly by. It had been an unusually quiet month on Voyager. They had journeyed past many worlds, stopped at a few, but they'd had no significant encounters. They had not heard from the Borg, or Q; no one had tried to abduct any member of the crew, or steal their organs, or change their DNA. It had been quiet, and the crew was beginning to feel restless. It had been too long that nothing had changed their lives. They had settled into their life aboard the ship, had become accustomed to their perpetual journey and maintained the status quo in their relationships with each other. Today, there was an air of anticipation among the crew, the senior staff particularly, as if something important were about to happen.
"Neelix to Captain Janeway," the Captain heard over the comm system.
"Janeway here," she replied.
"Ah, Captain," Neelix's boisterous voice continued, "I just wanted to remind you that tonight is the fourth birthday celebration for Naomi Wildman. I hope that you and all the senior staff will attend?"
A smile touched Janeway's lips. She had nearly forgotten that today was the birthday of her young "assistant." "We'll be there, Mr. Neelix," she replied.
"Thank you, Captain. We'll see you at 1900 hours. I've prepared a very special recipe for the birthday cake! Neelix out."
Looking around her at the rest of the bridge crew, Janeway told them, "I'll expect to see each of you at the celebration tonight." There was a general murmur of "yes ma'ams" all around the room as the rest of the crew nodded their consent.
Chakotay leaned over towards his partner in command and asked her, "Have you thought about a gift for the Captain's Assistant on her birthday?"
Turning her head to look at her first officer, Janeway nodded and smiled conspiratorially. "I have, Commander," she replied, "But you'll have to wait and find out what it is just like the rest of the crew." Chakotay raised his eyebrows, shrugged and turned back to the view screen.
As Chakotay inhaled slowly, enjoying the peace of the moment, he, too, felt the air of anticipation shared by the other members of the crew. Something was about to happen.
...
The smells of garlic, onions, tomatoes and chocolate – as well as some of their Delta Quadrant substitutes – wafted up from the kitchen in the mess hall. Neelix inhaled deeply, savoring the many sensations and smells of the meal he was preparing. As he chopped more cebola root for the pasta sauce, he glanced over at the large, decadent chocolate cake that was slowly baking in the over. He felt his eyes begin to water from the onion-like root he was chopping, and he ran a cold towel across his forehead to ease the sweat from the hot kitchen and the stinging from the cebola. It was moments like this, when he was completely alone and immersed in his cooking, that he allowed his mind to indulge in a brief thought of Kes; to wonder where she was and what she was doing, off on her higher plane of existence. He remembered her presence in this very kitchen, helping him to chop vegetables for similar meals. He remembered her at his side during many similar parties. He ran the cloth over his forehead and across his eyes again, no longer sure whether these tears were entirely from the cebola.
The sauce on the stovetop began to boil, and he turned it down to a simmer, adding the cebola and other vegetables. He then turned his attention to preparing the salad and his own special version of garlic bread. Naomi had wanted a special birthday dinner, and Neelix had been saving the appropriate ingredients for months in order to make exactly the meal that the little girl desired.
Just then, the doors to the mess hall swished open and in bounced the child herself. "Hello, Neelix," said Naomi, as she rushed over to him, trying to see what he was making.
"Now, Naomi," Neelix admonished, "you know that this dinner is supposed to be a surprise and you are not supposed to be in here today. Shouldn't you be studying, or helping Captain Janeway?"
"Aw, Neelix, I know you told me it was supposed to be a surprise, but I was just so curious to see what my cake is going to look like! I'm tired of studying, and Captain Janeway doesn't need any help. It's so boring on Voyager right now. Nothing exciting has happened for weeks."
"I hope you're not complaining about that," replied Neelix. "Usually the exciting things that happen on Voyager aren't things we want to happen. I think it's refreshing to have a few weeks of peace and quiet. That way we can all truly enjoy your birthday together without worrying about what's around the corner."
Naomi looked up at Neelix thoughtfully. "I suppose you're right," she said, with a twinkle in her eye. "But I still want to know what my birthday cake looks like!"
"Not till tonight," said Neelix. "Now why don't you go and pick out a dress for the party. I just have a few things to finish up here. By the time you pick out your dress and get ready for the party, you'll only have a few more minutes left to wait. Besides, you're the guest of honor. You need to take your time getting ready for the big celebration!"
Naomi knew that Neelix was just trying to get her out of the mess hall so he could finish his cooking, but he did it in such a thoughtful way that she couldn't help smiling. "Alright, Neelix. I'll see you in a little while. I'll go get ready."
"Good girl," Neelix replied.
"See you later!" Naomi exclaimed as she turned and walked swiftly out of the mess hall with a grin on her face.
Neelix finished adding the ingredients and spices to his sauce, put water on to boil for the pasta and took the cake out of the oven. He set it out to cool while he finished the garlic bread and salad, and with most of the meal underway or completed, Neelix turned back to the cake. After mixing a large bowl of chocolate frosting, he got out his decorating tubes and put a different color frosting in each one. He painstakingly decorated the cake with pictures of starships and planets, and on the top, in fancy script, he wrote, "Happy Birthday, Naomi!"
Just as he had finished the cake and begun to set up the buffet, he heard the doors to the mess hall open again. Looking up to see Captain Janeway, he realized that it must be 1900 already! "Captain," he said, flustered, "I'm just adding the finishing touches for our celebration tonight."
"That's alright, Neelix," she replied. "I'm a few minutes early. I just wanted to tuck my gift away somewhere before everyone arrived."
"The gift table is right over there, Captain," said Neelix, gesturing to a table set up to his right, with a fancy table cloth and decorations surrounding it.
"Thank you, Neelix," Janeway replied. She walked over to the table and placed a small, wrapped box towards the back of it. "Can I help you with anything?"
"No, no, Captain. Everything is fine. I've almost got everything set up."
"Well, Neelix," said Janeway, "I think you may have outdone yourself this time. It smells wonderful!"
"Thank you, Captain," replied Neelix, smiling. "You know I aim to please."
The door swished open again and in came the guest of honor, now wearing a party dress with her hair in curls. "Hello, Captain," Naomi said. "Hello, Neelix." Her mother was right behind her.
"Happy birthday, Naomi," replied Janeway. "I like your dress."
"Thank you very much, Captain. I'm glad you could be here tonight."
"Thank you for coming, Captain," Samantha Wildman added, smiling.
Janeway smiled, grateful for this rare moment of relaxation and peace. "I wouldn't miss it," she replied.
The rest of the crew gradually entered. They lined up for the buffet and everyone complimented the smells and tastes of Neelix's cooking. No one complained about his crazy concoctions tonight. The crew sat around the mess hall, talking, eating, drinking and enjoying each other's company. Captain Janeway sat near Naomi, Samantha and Chakotay, and it was Naomi who finally called over to Neelix, "Come and join us!"
"Just have to replenish the salad," Neelix replied from across the room. "Seems to be a big hit this time."
"Come and join us, Neelix," said Chakotay. "I think this crew is capable of getting their own salad."
"Very well, Commander." Neelix grabbed himself a plate of food and moved to join them.
Throughout the room, various snippets of cheerful conversation could be heard. "Tom, don't tell me B'Elanna beat you at holodeck ping pong again!" exclaimed Harry.
"Oh, I'm just trying to be nice," replied Paris. "I let her win."
Even without witnessing the conversation, a listener could hear Torres raise her eyebrows. "Really, flyboy?" she asked skeptically. "We'll just have to see about that when we have a rematch tomorrow!"
The Doctor and Seven of Nine were engaged in an animated discussion of Cosi fan tutte, comparing and contrasting it to Die zieberflaute.
Chakotay, sitting next to Captain Janeway, leaned over and spoke softly into her ear, "It's nice, isn't it?" She nodded, without even having to ask him what he meant. Everything seemed to be just as it should be. This was their family, happy, in harmony, at peace with each other and themselves, gathering to celebrate a joyous occasion.
Before long, Neelix tapped his fork against his glass, interrupting all conversation. "Everyone, everyone, may I please have your attention?" The noise of talking and laughing quieted to a low din as everyone turned to look at Neelix. "Tonight, we are celebrating the life of our youngest crew member, Naomi Wildman, and I would like you all to join me in a song to wish her a happy birthday." Neelix then revealed his gorgeous cake, covered in lighted candles, and motioned with his head for everyone to start singing. A chorus of "Happy Birthday" followed as Neelix carried the cake out and placed it in front of Naomi. "Make a wish," Neelix said. With a huge grin on her face, Naomi took a big breath and blew out her candles. Everyone applauded. Neelix served cake to everyone, and many crew members complimented him on the excellent dessert.
After Neelix had finished serving cake and had cut a piece for himself, Naomi approached him and threw her arms around him. "Thank you, Neelix," she said. "You've made my birthday so wonderful."
"There's nothing I wouldn't do for my little girl," Neelix replied.
After everyone ate their cake, it was time for Naomi to open her gifts. Harry handed her his first: a kit to perform scientific experiments, and Naomi was thrilled with it. She received puzzles, games, clothes, a stuffed animal from Neelix, and a book on astronomy from Seven of Nine, who said she thought Naomi would find the reading "useful." Her mother gave her a new chapter of Flotter's adventures for the holodeck.
Neelix watched the bright eyes of the little girl opening her gifts. He reveled in her happiness and in the contentment of those around him. Who would have thought that this group of angry, frightened, disparate people would have reached this kind of peace and togetherness, he wondered. The Doctor helped Naomi assemble a set of Starfleet officer action figures. B'Elanna sat on the floor, leaning up against Tom's knees. His hand gently stroked her hair, and he looked alternately on the girl enjoying her gifts, and the calm face of his love. Seven sat looking on, a smile beginning on her lips, despite the veiled melancholy in her eyes. Next to her, sat Captain Janeway, looking like a proud mother, while Chakotay stood behind her, one hand resting inconspicuously on her shoulder.
Then there was only one gift remaining on the table, a small, wrapped box. Naomi picked it up and studied it. "To Naomi Wildman from Captain Janeway," she read. Cocking her head to one side, she looked up at the Captain, then smiled brightly, her eyes lit with curiosity. Janeway smiled back. She felt Chakotay's hand tighten on her shoulder.
Carefully, Naomi unwrapped the gift. Under the paper was a small, silver box, which she opened carefully. Inside was a gold chain, with a small golden charm. It was a necklace, and the charm held a golden Starfleet pip. "You can't wear them properly yet," Janeway said, "but I guess this makes your role as Captain's assistant official."
Naomi's eyes widened and she took a few swift steps towards the Captain and threw her arms around her. "Thank you, Captain," she said, "I'm honored." Janeway sat there, hugging the child, stroking her hair, her own eyes misting at the scene. When Naomi broke the hug and looked up at the Captain, she was smiling. "Thank you," she said again. Janeway winked in response, which only made the child's smile even wider.
"Well," said Neelix, "there's still a lot more cake left. Who wants seconds?" The room began to bustle once again with jovial energy and conversation. Slowly, the guests began to trickle out, wishing happy birthday to Naomi and heading off to their quarters or to their next duty shift. Neelix and Samantha took Naomi off to bed and everyone wished her goodnight. Soon, only Tom, B'Elanna, Janeway, Chakotay and Tuvok remained in the mess hall. Tuvok had come in towards the end of the party, having been relieved from the bridge by Ensign Kim. Tom still sat in one of the lounge chairs, B'Elanna with her head in his lap. Janeway, Chakotay and Tuvok had pulled up nearby chairs, and they were engaged in quiet conversation, enjoying each other's company.
"Well, I thought Neelix did a great job putting that one together," said Tom. "The food was great. Nothing too high stress. It was a really nice night."
"I agree," said B'Elanna, looking up at him. "It's nice to just be together."
"I have observed," said Tuvok, "that this crew has truly begun to act 'like a family,' as Captain Janeway puts it. It improves our efficiency as well as our morale. That said, I must take my leave for the evening. Goodnight." He looked around at his companions, and his eyes came to rest on Janeway. "Captain," he acknowledged her.
"Goodnight, Tuvok," she said, with a smile. A chorus of "goodnights" and "see you tomorrows" followed from the other three remaining in the room.
For several minutes, they sat there in silence, each contemplating their own thoughts. It was not uncomfortable for them to sit in each other's company without a word. They absorbed the peaceful quiet of the moment, each feeling their own kind of serenity and peace.
B'Elanna looked across at Captain Janeway. "A penny for your thoughts, Captain," she asked.
The Captain shook her head slightly. "I'm very grateful for this crew. We seem to be able to adapt to any situation." She chuckled. "Although I think for some people the peace and quiet of the last few weeks has been the hardest thing to adapt to."
"I'm enjoying it," Paris replied. "Spending time with B'Elanna, playing around on the holodeck, taking the Delta Flyer out for a spin… what could be bad?" He grinned and placed a kiss on his Torres' head.
"And we've finally been able to do all the repairs and maintenance that have been put off for months," added B'Elanna. "It's been a luxury."
"Oh, I agree," said Janeway. "Believe me, no one is enjoying this more than I." She turned to her first officer. "You've been unusually quiet this evening."
Chakotay shrugged. "Not much to say, I guess," he replied. "Or not the right words to say it." His eyes seemed to be gazing off at a distant planet, or at some unknown vision in the recesses of his mind. Janeway extended her hand, and that seemed to bring him back to the present. He took the extended hand in a gentle, easy motion, and clasped her fingers lightly in his own.
Then, B'Elanna glanced up at Tom with a look that he knew well, and they simultaneously began to stand up. Chakotay and Janeway also moved to stand, but Tom shook his head and motioned with his hand for them to stay seated. There was no need for formalities. "We're going to turn in for the night," Tom said, helping B'Elanna up from the floor. Paris and Torres bid the Captain and First Officer goodnight and left the mess hall.
Janeway and Chakotay sat there, their hands remaining clasped. Chakotay softly ran his thumb over the back of her hand, back and forth. They were not looking at each other, but slowly, as if by the pull of gravity, their eyes met. For a moment, they looked into each other's eyes, allowing themselves one vulnerable second before Janeway withdrew her hand. "Chakotay," she said softly, "it's late. We should both get some rest." Chakotay nodded and stood, as she stood as well. "Oh," she groaned, "I've been sitting too long."
"Let me walk you back to your quarters," Chakotay said. Together, they walked out of the mess hall, down the corridor and to the turbolift.
"What were you thinking about tonight, Chakotay?" she asked. "I know there's something on your mind."
"I was thinking about something my father told me once," he replied slowly. "The greater the trials you undergo, the more you appreciate the joyous moments in life. There was a legend about an eagle."
"A legend?" asked Janeway with a smile, raising her eyebrows.
Chakotay returned the smile and replied, "This was a real legend. I just can't quite remember it. My father must have told it to me when I was very young."
"And you were thinking of it tonight because you think that what lies before us are more difficult trials than those we have already faced?"
He nodded. "That is why I was thinking of it, yes."
"Well, Chakotay," Janeway said, "if that's true, whatever those trials are, we will face them, and we'll face them together, as you have told me many times."
He nodded. "I know." They were standing in front of the door to her quarters.
"Well," she said softly, "goodnight, Chakotay."
"Goodnight, Kathryn." They each slipped into their quarters and were left to their private musings. Neither one noticed the almost imperceptible beam of light that swept through the corridor after them.