flashing lights and we took a wrong turn
and we fell down a rabbit hole
haven't you heard what becomes of curious minds?
i should have slept with one eye open at night
Part I: His Curiosity
She was like a kaleidoscope of memories, each one as blinding as the last. They were fractured, scattered within the recesses of his mind, but images of her face, and her eyes, always remained at the forefront. He both detested and longed for it. Without even trying, by just merely existing, she had become a permanent fixture within his brain.
She exuded fearlessness in the most subtle way, and it lay in her ability to seize every moment that could possibly make her happy. Embracing the life she had in front of her, she chose to savour the few segments that were not filled with the absolute certainty of death.
Every moment with her was a moment that could have been their last. She found that it made them that much more significant, Levi just found it terrifying.
Truth be told, he hadn't even noticed her at first. He wondered how quiet she may have been amongst the latest batch of recruits to have gone under his peripheral so easily. That wasn't to say he didn't value her service, Levi did not take a single life sacrificed for the fight of humanity for granted, nor their dedication to fighting. However, so many died so quickly - especially fresh recruits. If he had been in a less life threatening situation within that moment, he would have chided himself for such a thing.
She struck him for an incredibly bizarre reason, but one he would not be able to ever forget.
The Corps were pulling back, after the fall of Wall Maria, and Shiganshina, the year before, they'd embarked on an expedition. With the aim to reach Wall Maria, and with fresh recruits from the 100th Training Corps - regardless of how few there were - had put them in a better position.
The blue flare had been released soon enough, ordering them to retreat, much to Levi's chagrin.
Petra had retrieved an injured cadet, pulling him onto the roof of a building in a nearby village, amongst cadet's who had been held back to assist the halt of straggling Titan's that were on their heels. The formation had broken.
'He's bleeding out!'
Petra's yell indicated she was frustrated, but not panicked. She had seen this enough times to know how this would go, and yet tears still stung at her eyes. A bite had been taken right out of the cadet's side, unable to move as he was laid out on the tiles of the roof, he descended into a panicked cry. He was just a kid, she thought, barely twenty.
Levi's gaze turned to Petra, and the young boy she leaned over slightly as she tried to calm him. He made way towards them, and his grey eyes caught movement in the corner as another recruit landed on the roof. Sweeping past him to kneel by the injured cadet.
Chestnut brown hair pulled up into a bundle atop of her head, with loose strands framing her small face. She looked absolutely pathetic, barely taller than Levi, he surmised. Yet there was a kindness on her soft features, and warmness in her bright blue eyes as she placed one hand on the young man's chest, and the other on his cheek.
'Otto.' She said steadily, softly. As if she were comforting a child wrought with grief. 'Otto, it's okay. You're okay.'
He was bleeding at a rate which strongly signified otherwise, but Levi watched as she ignored it. Her eyes never leaving the young mans. His chest contracted quickly, the sign of someone fighting for their last breaths. Grasping at their last remainder of life, whatever you could to get one final taste before plunging into nothingness. The fear in his eyes was palpable.
'Look up.' She said continued, using her hand to softly but firmly steady his thrashing head. 'Look at the sky. Look, the sun is starting to set!'
Otto's green eyes flickered from hers, and up to the sky, attempting to focus as he fought the edges of unconsciousness away with all he had left.
'Can you see those colours, Otto? The pink, the orange, mixing in with the blue? It's beautiful.' A smile was on her lips as she looked back down to him, noticing that his eyes remained on the sky, his breathing beginning to slow. 'We spend so much time looking over our shoulders in fear, don't we? That we forget to look up, and look at the sky and the stars, and think about just how much is out there. How much there's yet for us to discover. We used to do that a lot though, didn't we?'
He reached for her hand, resting on his bloody chest, gripping it tightly. As if to agree with her, unable to mutter the words.
'That's what we fight for, remember? That possibility, that hope, that there's more out there. One day someone's going to look up, and they won't wonder, because they'll know. We are giving that to them.'
Otto gripped her hand tighter, and it were as if she could sense the last remnants of fear within him.
'It's okay, Otto. You can rest.'
It was almost an ethereal image before him, as if she were granting him safe passage into whatever next life there may - or may not - have been. With chaos erupting around them, she behaved as if they had all the time in the world to sit there and look at the sky. Levi couldn't decipher whether he was disgusted or fascinated, as he and Petra stared in stunned silence.
When his final breaths escaped his lips, Otto was smiling.
Hana Becker hadn't led a particularly remarkable life, as the daughter of a baker she had lived a fairly quiet one. It was Otto who had instilled in her the dream of the Survey Corps into her mind, as children it had been all they could talk about. A profession that they had massively romanticised, with no good reason to, for they had seen how often the soldiers returned bloodied and beaten; they were citizens of Shiganshina. They had seen first hand the dwindled numbers in which they had repeatedly returned in.
Nevertheless, they were driven by the same motivations that any soldier who enrolled into it did, to see the outside world. To see whether books and myths chronicling large masses of water, and dry lands were true. The notion that there was a possibility for a better world out there was instilled into their minds.
Death was an inevitability, Hana was very much aware that when it eventually clutched her within its grasp, that it would be painful. Perhaps bloody, and slow; Titan's were never particularly in a hurry to eat you once they had you. She just hadn't anticipated Otto leaving her so early.
Her Squad Leader, Mike Zacharius, said nothing to her upon their return. He barely flinched as they pronounced Otto dead, but she received a small squeeze of her shoulder from Nanaba.
'You grew up together, right?'
Hana nodded, and to Nanaba's surprise, she smiled brightly at her superior. It felt neither forced nor fake, and the darkness that begun to seep into the skin below her eyes was the only indication of her exhaustion.
'He died doing what he believed in. He died happy.'
The blonde stared at her in silence, before nodding and dismissing her. Allowing her to return her horse to the stables. Nanaba, as did the rest of Squad Mike, learned that day that Hana's soft and happy demeanour was not one that wavered easily. Nor was it false. If she hadn't seen what the kid was like when slaying a Titan, then she would have concluded that the girl didn't belong in the Survey Corps. It didn't have a place for that sort of naivety.
Perhaps, Nanaba thought, Hana would be the one to prove her wrong.
'That new cadet you have.' Levi said, voice curt. 'Is she of any use?'
It took Mike several seconds to realise that Levi had directed his question towards him. He was sat opposite Levi in the dining hall of their Head Quarters, along with Hanji and their Commander, and a few other captains. No personnel of lower ranks ever sat at their table.
Chewing on a roll of bread, Mike turned his head to look behind him, following Levi's line of sight. The shorter of the two's cold grey eyes stared blankly at Hana Becker.
She was sat at a table on her own, writing in what appeared to be a notebook, in a corner of the dining hall. Silently. He noticed she was always on her own when off duty, despite her appearing to get along with anyone she came into contact with. Regardless of whether she was alone or not, she always looked content. Happy, even. It irked him a little, what was there to always be happy about?!
Mike narrowed his eyes, turning back to Levi with an irritated look on his face.
'You can't have her.' He growled. 'Stop stealing all my best recruits. You already took Petra.'
'So, she is competent.' He surmised, taking a sip of his steaming tea as his gaze left her.
Mike didn't answer, though he knew it wasn't posed as a question. Hana was indeed a good soldier, almost shockingly so, he had half expected her to burst into tears when embarking on their first expedition. Instead, she had remained calm, and abided by orders diligently. She was unnaturally fast, though he put that down to her small stature and frame, and her instincts when in battle were impressive.
When looking over her credentials, he found she had graduated in the top five of her Training Corps. He concluded that some intense training with his team would make her almost lethal, and he wanted to be the one to hone her abilities. Not the midget that sat opposite him.
Levi cast a bored look at Mike, unperturbed by his glare as he continued on. 'You know the soldiers with the most potential have the best chance of becoming useful under my tutelage.'
'I'm just as good as you, short stack. I've also got more experience as a Squad Leader, so watch your fucking mouth.'
'Tch.' Levi looked away, his expression nonchalant as he let the subject go.
Mike refused to let him take another promising soldier from his team, she would do well in enemy scouting. She wasn't easily rattled, if at all, when given startling or unusual circumstances. That's exactly what they needed. He vividly remembered how she didn't bat an eyelid at him upon their first meeting, she hadn't flinched at the stare he had fixed on her, nor did she lean back and away from him when he had sniffed at her.
Instead, she asked him a question.
'What do I smell like? I've always wondered.'
He decided, in that moment, that she was indeed insane enough to belong to the Survey Corps.
She was also incredibly endearing, and at twenty years old, it made her the youngest in his team by almost a decade. As mean as he was, he still held an amount of protectiveness over his subordinates - especially his youngest member, who smiled as if she were seeing the sun rise for the very first time. Yes, Mike Zacharius would fight tooth and nail to keep Levi's small, hygiene obsessed hands off of his latest recruit. If it were the last thing he did.
He'd lost the cadet to Levi, of course, it didn't take much to convince Erwin to green light his request. Levi inferred that it would be some time before he was forgiven by Zacharius, not that he cared much for his forgiveness to begin with. They both knew the best place to develop her abilities would be under Levi, whether Zacharius wanted to admit that or not. It was more than that though, Levi would admit he was curious about her. A kid like that joining was a death sentence, usually. Yet there she was with three solo Titan kills upon her first expedition. To him, she was an enigma.
The cadet in question stared amusedly at her new captain, her hair braided back and out of her face. It was cleaning day, and thus it was Hana's first time seeing Levi in his cleaning attire up close. His cravat was currently peeking beneath the napkin he had wrapped around his mouth, which he had pushed down to his chin in order to speak. He also had one wrapped around the crown of his head, which Hana assumed was to keep it out of his face while he cleaned. He hadn't stopped there, either, he was also in a dull grey apron. His formal uniform beneath it.
She was certain that she wasn't the only one who found it amusing.
'Something funny, cadet?' he deadpanned.
That was a trick question, she realised. If she said say yes, he would reprimand her for being insubordinate. If she said no, he'd tell her to wipe her smile off of her face. When she said nothing, his eyes darkened, and Hana knew when not to test someone like him. Even though she found him far from intimidating in that moment, she did respect him. Idolised him, even. So Hana opted for silence, and she concluded that was what he wanted from her.
That and submission.
'Your task is to scrub every stairway in this quarter of the building, and the bannisters.' He said nothing more, and breezed past her.
'How many times?' She called out, turning around to stare at his retreating back.
Levi halted in his steps, his head only turning by an inch to indicate he had heard her.
'Excuse me?'
'How many times do you want me to scrub it? Once will not completely dissolve the grime.'
He didn't need to face her to know that she was probably smiling as she spoke, and he'd admit it irked him to a degree. Not because there was any smugness in her tone, or that she was doing it to irritate him. It because she was being genuine, and knowing that her smile was sincere made him wonder why in the hell she would choose this life.
God, who was this kid?!
'As many times as it takes, until I am satisfied.' He deadpanned, before he continued walking.
That was the second time she had made a lasting impression on him.
Hana thought back to her previous captain, whom had grumbled out insults beneath his breath after informing her that she was transferring. She had recalled he didn't look particularly happy about it, while she remained confused. The transfer was unexpected, but Mike had assured her that her skills would serve better in Levi's team, which was Special Operations.
'It's an honour to be transferred to them.' He sarcastically remarked, 'It only happens by request.'
'Captain Levi requested my transfer?' Hana blinked, brushing loose strands of her chestnut hair out of her face.
Mike Zacharius had ignored her question, and instead placed a hand on the twenty year old's head, a rare and apologetic look adorning his features.
'Listen kid, he can be a bit . . . difficult. He's hardest on the newest recruits, so just keep your head down.' Hana nodded, smiling up towards her superior.
It was only for a moment, and really he blamed the kid for it, but he let a smile of his own slip. Hana caught onto it, her eyes lighting with joy. He recovered, replacing it with a slight scowl, and removed his hand from her head.
'You smiled! I made you smile!' She pointed a finger at him, a laugh escaping her lips. 'I knew you liked me!'
'Yeah, yeah. Just remember what I said, kid.' He waved her off, turning his back on her to return to his desk.
Before closing the door behind her, she turned back to him. 'Thank you for everything that you taught me, Captain. I'll miss the team.'
She didn't miss the soft look in his eyes as he nodded towards her. Thinking back on it while she scrubbed the bannisters on the second floor, it warmed her heart to know he cared enough to offer her advice.
Quickly, she realised that no amount of cleaning was good enough for her new superior. Hana had guessed as much, but she expected - as Zacharius had warned - that he would be pretty hard on her for a few weeks. She didn't think that her grin when she noticed his cleaning attire had helped her either, but she was alright with it. As Zacharius said, if she kept her head down she imagined he would ease up. Well, ease up in a way that didn't feel like he was specifically targeting her anymore. Hana had found him a little predictable in how he handled new recruits, and she supposed that he had expected her to put up more of a fight, or complain. Instead she had gone for the path of least resistance, besides, cleaning wasn't that bad.
She didn't even think he knew her name, let alone want to recruit her into the special operations team. It was said to be both an honour and a death sentence.
'I think you've scrubbed that enough times.'
Hana looked to the top of the stairs to Petra, who was smiling down at her, arms folded. The two girls had shared several conversations already, since they bunked in the same barracks, but Hana didn't know if she could call her a friend yet.
It had been less than a month, and apart from Petra, the others hadn't really spoken to her much. Like Levi, Eld wasn't really one for conversation, but he was a good instructor during training. Oluo seemed to be a member no one ever took seriously, despite his kill number and how old he looked, but Hana put that down to the fact he bickered with Petra so much and that he did silly things like imitate their captain. Gunther was helpful during training, and calm if Hana felt like she had asked a dumb question, but he hadn't spoken to her much outside of it.
She eventually realised that she would need to prove her loyalty, and earn their trust, over some time. They were a much closer group that she initially thought, and she admired that.
'I'll leave that for the Captain to decide.' She said, halting in her scrubbing to look up at Petra. She was currently on her hands and knees, sweat had dripped down her neck, it was a particularly hot day. 'Otherwise he'll tell me to do it a tenth time.'
Petra smiled at the newest member, 'he'll ease up, he's just making sure you listen to orders.'
Hana nodded in response, returning the smile and going back to her task.
'You don't talk much, do you?'
Hana was asked that a lot, for most of her life, and her usual answer was something she realised wouldn't suffice anymore. At least, not in the present tense.
'Otto was the talker, I just mostly listened.'
Silence descended upon the two, and Petra gave the girl a sympathetic look as Hana turned away. She'd meant it when she said that she knew he had died happy, doing what he wanted. It didn't completely erase the empty feeling in Hana's chest, nor the loss of him, and she hadn't anticipated feeling this lonely.
'I know we're all going to die,' her voice was soft, 'and so did Otto. But . . . I didn't expect him to go so early.' She laughed softly. 'Sorry, was that dumb?'
'No. Not at all.' Petra assured, her own smile soft. 'Were you two . . . ?'
She let her question settle in the silence between them, before Hana's eyes widened and a laugh escaped her lips. She shook her head.
'No . . God no. We grew up together, he was like a brother.' She laughed once more, it was an assumption she had gotten often. Almost automatically an influx of silly memories invaded her mind, and she couldn't get past the image of him as a child sharing a bath with her, or the times he'd wet his pants when he was in trouble with his father.
'I wasn't exactly his type anyway.'
Petra's eyes widened slightly when she deciphered what Hana meant. 'Oh- Ohhhhhh. I see.'
'Our fathers had been friends, but we lost them when Wall Maria fell. That was the year we enlisted, he was the only family I had left.'
'Not anymore.' Petra chirped, pointing a thumb at herself. 'In time your family will expand to us.'
Hana sat up a little, opening her mouth to thank Petra before they were interrupted.
'I don't recall idle gossip being part of todays chores.' Levi had appeared from behind Petra, and despite him only being a few inches taller than her, his dark eyes and stoney face set her on a panicked edge. 'Get your lazy ass back to work.'
'Yes, sir.' Petra cast an apologetic smile at Hana before leaving.
Levi stood in absolute silence as Hana returned to her task, she could feel his stare on her head as she focused on the stone steps. She dunked the brush back into the bucket, forcing herself to not look up at him as she continued with both hands. She guessed that he was probably waiting for her to react in some way, since he didn't sound particularly pleased over the fact she and Petra had been talking.
In actuality, he was appraising her, trying to locate any indication that her previous conversation had had any affect on her mood. He'd heard her speak of her deceased friend, whom had been the reason he had discovered her within the Corps to begin with. Only he found nothing, except that she was deliberately avoiding his gaze, not even the sag of shoulders. He doubted she was that good at hiding her emotions, she seemed fine with displaying them. Had she really just accepted the inevitability of death without numbing everything she could feel?
It was impossible for a girl this naive.
'You're dismissed once this task is complete.'
He was gone before Hana could even look up to confirm what he had said, leaving no trace of his presence. If Petra hadn't seen him herself, Hana would have questioned if he had been there at all.
He realised she was an idiot, with a heart far too big, not long after that. Really he should have returned her to Zacharius, for he shouldn't have to babysit his damn subordinates in such a way.
It had started off as a casual enough day; upon a training session she had been acutely following every single one of his manoeuvres in what he assumed was an attempt to replicate some of them. She had good instincts, and he observed that she was quick enough to embrace an unideal situation and adapt. He needed that to translate in the field, which according to Zacharius, it did.
'I expect you to work in tandem with the team.' He instructed, as he glided through the trees. 'However, there will be occasions where we are forced to act alone, and on instinct, but without behaving recklessly.'
To emphasise his point, he suddenly redirected his grapple hooks, and it yanked him backwards, in the opposite direction that he and Hana had been gliding in. On cue a wooden Titan entered her line of vision, taller than the previous ones.
Thinking of what he had previously said, she disconnected her grapple hooks, firing them higher into the tree line as the gas propelled her upwards, narrowly missing the makeshift titan she would have crashed into. The momentum propelled her higher, and she readied her blades as her hooks were redirected below her into the back of the Titan. She spun, downwards, and fast, slicing through the nape of the Titan.
Hana steadied herself as she slowed down, coming to land on the forest floor.
'Did she . . . did she just use the Captain's move?' Oluo stumbled out.
Gunther raised an eyebrow, as he came to land beside him, moderately impressed. 'When did she learn that?'
'Ha!' Petra laughed out, still suspended in the air. 'What did you expect? She's been watching every move we make.'
Levi landed in front of her, face impassive. He placed his blades into their respective holders, folding his arms. He was annoyed, Hana realised.
'Did I not advise you to avoid being reckless?'
'Sorry, Captain.' She didn't try to explain herself, in truth she just wanted to see whether she was capable of exacting that move.
It required so much control of your body physically, you needed to be in the correct position at the right time. She thought he would have been impressed, she knew he was impressed, but she also knew he hated being disobeyed more.
'While a move like that needs a large amount of skill to be executed, it also drains you of your gas. If you're on your own, the chances of survival plummet drastically, and if you're in an open space, it's even less.' His glare darkened. 'Gas reserves are vital in these scenarios. Use that fucking brain of yours to do some critical thinking before making a dumbass move like that.'
'Yes, Captain.' She smiled, nodding in understanding. She looked so damn eager to do well that it was irritating him.
He had chewed her out, but she didn't miss the fact that he had essentially called her skilled for making the move in the first place. So she would welcome the insults, because it also meant she had improved, and that meant she would become a better and valuable soldier to humanity.
Besides, he may have used colourful language, but she knew it was constructive criticism.
She turned away from him once dismissed from practice, joining Oluo, Gunther and Petra on the walk back. Smiling in gratitude as she was complimented for the move.
'Not bad, kid.' Gunther remarked quietly, shoving at her shoulder lightly. 'Silent, but deadly. You're full of surprises.'
Oluo looked at her suspiciously. 'How did you do it? He never taught you that move.'
'Practice.' She shrugged. 'Lots of practice.'
'Have you been practicing on your own? Out of hours?'
Hana nodded in confirmation to Petra's question, unsure of why she looked so surprised. She was sure they all did similarly, they couldn't have been as good as they were just out of talent.
'Why didn't you ask one of us for help?'
Hana looked back to Petra, only realising now that that was probably an option.
'I . . . didn't know that I could?'
'We're team, idiot. You're supposed to ask us for help.' Oluo scoffed. 'Remember that.'
She nodded, refraining from apologising, because she knew that would irk him, and followed in silence. Gunther, looked up to the sky, seeing that the sun was low, indicating it was late afternoon. He descended into a conversation with Hana's superiors, as she begun to daydream. She begun to feel guilty at their surprise over her private practice sessions, she hadn't thought they would care. In fact she thought it was expected of her to do just that.
Perhaps, Hana thought, she hadn't been trying hard enough to befriend them as her team. It was different to Mike's team, it seemed easier to worm her way into their good graces, despite her sitting by herself during meal time's. Commitment not just to the cause, but to the team as an individual, was the most prominent quality Levi's team appeared to ask for.
'Who spends their birthday training?! Was he always this boring?'
Hana blinked, returning back to the conversation upon hearing of a birthday.
'Eld never does anything like that, he thinks it's a waste of time.' Gunther replied to Petra, as if the answer was obvious.
'Why would it be a waste of time?' Hana chided in softly. 'Your birthday is the only day you can literally make everything about you. It should be a happy day.'
'Still being alive to make it to another birthday is joy enough.' Oluo remarked.
'So you guys don't do presents, or cake?' Oluo looked at Hana as if she were stupid, and she gathered that he thought it was good enough response. Frowning, she continued. 'That's so sad. Everyone should celebrate their birthday.'
'It isn't exactly like the Captain would allow something like a party anyway.' Petra shrugged, bright eyes flickering to Hana. 'I just thought Eld would do something, like take the day off or whatever.'
'It's a waste of time.' Gunther mused. 'It's just another day.'
But it wasn't, Hana wanted to say, though she gathered already that no one agreed. Which was sort of . . . miserable. Surely you could let yourself enjoy your birthday? It wasn't exactly like you were asking to run around stark naked through the dining hall at lunch. Hana decided it wasn't something she'd allow her team to do from now on, and decided that there was still a couple of hours until supper was due. She could make it into town and back in time for that.
Levi watched the group leave, his eyes focusing on Hana's back as she trailed after them. Eld stood behind him, rubbing at his bearded chin as he appraised the same girl.
'She couldn't have executed that move just after watching it a couple of times.' He mused.
'She's been practicing.' Levi added, though he was certain Eld would have already concluded to this.
'She's good.' Eld said, an amused grunt escaping his lips. 'Better than I expected, but she needs a lot of work. A lot of it is unrefined, raw talent.'
'Tch. Did you think I would recruit a useless sack of shit?'
'You stare at her a lot, I thought you might be sweet on her.' Eld joked dryly.
'Don't be ridiculous.' Levi scowled, turning to Eld. He changed the subject. 'I dismissed you for today, why did you turn up for training?'
'It's a dumb celebration.' Eld waved off. 'Why would I choose to spend it alone, anyway?'
Levi said nothing as they begun their walk towards their horses, their subordinates still in their line of sight, but smaller. Nothing more was said on Eld's birthday, until later that night, during supper. The man in question stared in surprise as Hana stood by his table, a friendly smile on her face as she held the small cupcake in front of him. A single candle stood in its centre, the flame flickering as she recited happy birthday to him.
Surprisingly, her voice was sweet, though nothing outstanding.
The dining hall remained in absolute silence as she did so, both because she had presented her superior with a dinky little cupcake, and because it was Eld Jinn she was doing it for. He wasn't exactly known for his conversation.
Petra, Gunther and Oluo stared openly at the scene in front of them, and Hana chose to imprint their amusing faces into her memory. Eld cleared his throat when she finished, placing the cupcake in front of him, his cheeks reddened in embarrassment when she waited for him to blow out the single candle. He then nodded, muttering a barely audible 'thank you'. Hana was satisfied with it though, and turned away from him and the rest of their team to return to her lone table. Immersing herself in her notebook as if she hadn't just embarrassed him in front of the entire legion.
Mike Zacharius and Hanji Zoe grinned from their table across the hall, the latter of the captain's more obvious and slightly deranged, while Mike's was subtle. Of course she was the type to buy someone a birthday cake, and sing it to them in a crowd.
'God, that kid.' Mike muttered under his breath, and slowly the rest of the dining hall begun to return to their own conversations.
Levi sat opposite his commander, Erwin, who sported a smirk over the debacle that had just occurred. He cleared his throat, as if to fight a laugh, and Levi wanted to scowl at him. He knew he had something to say.
'It seems the cadet you both were fighting over has a flare for theatrics.'
Being reminded of the fact that Levi had deliberately stolen another one of his recruits, Mike directed a glare towards him from his end of the table.
'She's not as unhinged as four eyes, and has far more potential.' Levi quipped, sipping at his tea. He kept his gaze on the young cadet across the hall.
'That's just hurtful.' Hanji pouted, not offended by the comment. 'There was no need to drag me into it.'
Mike inwardly bristled, feeling the sudden urge to protect his former cadet. 'Her heart's in the right place, she's just-'
'An idiot.' Levi interjected, levelling his deadpan gaze at him.
He was mildly irate with Hana, and the stunt she just pulled. This legion was full of leeches tight with their pay checks, he knew that a majority of them would at least try to dupe her into thinking it was their birthdays just to get a free cake out of it. They were all fucking children.
'She's not an idiot.' Mike countered. 'She just likes to make sure everyone's happy.'
'It's childish.' Levi deadpanned, and turned his face away from the captain to end the conversation.
'Nevertheless,' Erwin mused, ending the conversation. 'It was a nice gesture.'
As Levi had predicted, Hana had sung happy birthday, and provided similar cupcakes, to three other soldiers that week. He was livid. It was bad enough to have a member of his squad embarrass him with something so juvenile, but it was even worse that she didn't seem to mind. Who in hell bought birthday cake's for people they barely knew?!
So, Levi bitterly thought, it was up to him to amend the situation, since she was clearly incapable of taking care of herself.
He chose to start with a casual warning to any future leeches, lest they accost her during her work hours. She was being paid to become one of humanity's valuable soldiers, not a birthday party planner.
It started when he discovered a trio of male cadets lurking around the barracks, more specifically, the women's. Considering that the men's barracks where on the opposite side of the stables, they had no reason to be snooping this late in the afternoon.
His footing was light as he leaned against the doorway of the entrance of one of the barrack's entrances, watching the three relatively young cadets as they huddled around one of the bunks. They were younger than Hana, from what he could see, idiotic teenagers.
'She bunks with Petra, doesn't she?'
'I don't know. When I asked Petra she told me to leave Hana alone.'
At least someone in Levi's squad was behaving responsibly.
'Yeah, but it's cleaning day for them. Why don't we try Captain Levi's quarters? I think Hana's-'
'If I'm not mistaken you do not belong in this quarter of the barracks.' Levi interrupted, his voice low, yet it sufficed in causing all three boys' shoulders to tense and turn. Standing to attention in front of Levi, all boys raised their fists to their chest. Alarmed looks on their faces.
'N- no sir.' One muttered, and Levi folded his arms as his grey eyes scanned each of their faces.
'I'm assuming you're just lost, and that you are not here with the specific aim of taking advantage, and abusing, my subordinates generosity by falsifying the date of your birth for the sake of a fucking birthday cake.'
Levi's tone remained monotonous, but the dangerousness of his eyes emphasised that he did not want an answer, just submission. All three of the boys shook their heads in unison.
'And that you will not be harassing her with such a juvenile request in the future.'
This time, they nodded, and it wasn't until they were verbally dismissed by Levi that they released a breath. The three of them scurrying out of the women's barracks with their eyes cast down to the floor.
The captain though that that should suffice in keeping Hana from going broke over stupid gifts, as word was surely bound to spread, but just in case it didn't he had one more plan in place. He scoffed, really this kid was just too much damn trouble.
Without a word of greeting, or even eye contact, Levi placed his supper and cup of tea on Hana's empty table that same evening. She looked up from her soup, eyes inquisitive, but said nothing on the matter. She returned to her meal, a smile now gracing her lips, for she knew exactly why he had done so. Her captain practically ignored her, and the multiple stares and whispers that came from surrounding tables.
The only time he shifted was when he caught sight of two members of the legion heading towards Hana's table, she looked up at them with a friendly smile, a greeting on the tip of her tongue until they halted in their steps. A tense look adorned their face, and Hana turned to her captain to see that he was staring directly at them, expression feigning nonchalance, but the daring look in his eyes was obvious.
Both men turned around, and headed back towards their table, and Levi returned to sipping his tea.
'You don't have to babysit me, I'm not a child.'
Her tone wasn't accusatory, as he anticipated, nor was it irate. Instead, she seemed mildly amused, perhaps even touched, and that annoyed him further. She didn't look up from her notepad as she spoke, which made Levi want to snatch it from beneath her in order to have her undivided attention.
'I wouldn't need to if you weren't so idiotic.' He deadpanned. 'Stop wasting your money on useless brats who haven't even taken the time to learn your last name.'
'People are allowed to have a little piece of inconsequential joy in their lives, especially people like us. Stop being a spoil sport.'
She looked up at him then, her smile soft, as she placed her chin in her palm, leaning on it. Hana imagined he had never had a birthday cake, which was probably how he preferred it. He scowled in response, looking away from her to stab at his his meal in silence. As she had guessed, he was just as studious with the way he consumed his meal as he was about mess in his vicinity. He chewed quietly.
'Remind me of when your birthday is again?' She teased, and his eyes flashed.
He swallowed his food before responding.
'If you ever have the audacity to cause such a spectacle with me, I will have you on stable cleaning duty for the next six months.'
She laughed, and the sound was so soft and damn lovely he could almost gag. This was humiliating.
'Okay, so a cake and candle isn't your style.'
'Any efforts to interfere in my private matters, or obtain confidential information, will resort to punishment.'
She didn't seem the least bit threatened, and a flash of a memory of an old friend crossed his mind. It was barely detectable, but the way in which she reacted to his threats was almost like Isabel. Except Isabel had been loud, brash, externally confident. Hana was none of those things, but her evident lack of fear for Levi, whilst simultaneously showing him respect, made it difficult to ignore the single similarity. Only she didn't evoke the same paternal affection as Isabel had, instead something he wasn't familiar with planted itself in the pit of his stomach. He buried it.
'Don't be an idiot, kid.' He said after a beat of silence. 'If you're going to waste your money, waste it on useless shit that makes you happy.'
Her eyes softened at his words, despite them being void of empathy or sincerity, she still knew he meant well. A little like her previous captain, except Levi was a lot more blunt. She respected it, she didn't imagine you got to the sort of position he did without having to make yourself so.
'But I like making other people happy.' She shrugged, and Levi appraised her for another stretch of silence.
'You're unbearably naive.'
'Perhaps,' she laughed, and again he tried to tune out the part of him that found the sound pleasant. 'But sir, you know as well as anyone how short our life span is here. It would almost be a sin to not steal some type of joy in the moments where we are relieved of that reality.'
He would never say he agreed, so instead he said nothing. He remained in silence, thus ending the conversation. Hana took the hint, and returned back to her scribblings in her notebook. From his position, he couldn't see what she wrote, since her hair had fallen around her face, shielding the notepad and her expression from him. She had shoved her empty bowl to the side, and leaned on the table.
Suddenly, she looked up, and her pale blue eyes took him off guard for a second. Hana placed her chin in her palm once more, staring at him, as if she were deliberating asking something.
'Spit it out.' He mumbled, bringing his teacup to his lips.
'That- that move I've seen you do. The one where you descend from the head of the titan, and spin around it with your blades.' She said quietly, and it was the first time she had ever looked nervous, he realised. 'Could . . . could you show me how to do that?'
He stared at her for several moments, wondering what prompted the question. Really, she should have been practicing her assists more, considering that was a weak spot of hers, and it were almost as if she could read Levi's mind.
'The others are going to show me how to help set up and assist attacks more tomorrow afternoon.' She supplied. 'But I really would also like to learn some more fatal solo attacks.'
Their eyes remained locked for a few moments, and if he were anyone else he would have rolled his eyes at how eager she was to please both him and the team. Which was something he did want from her, only to be less embarrassing about it, yet she didn't seem to care how obvious she may be. She took pride in it even. He simply could not comprehend it.
'We'll start at 6AM tomorrow morning.' He answered eventually, looking away from her. 'Be at the training grounds at 5:55, anything after and you're late.'
'Thank you, Captain.' Her smile was so bright it was almost blinding, like she was seeing the sun for the first time.
He didn't know how to explain it, but it was a smile so untainted that it almost made her the sun. Unique, almost painful to look at, but difficult to move your eyes away from. And her tone was so painfully sincere, emphasising the genuine gratitude that she so clearly felt and he hated. God, he hated it. It was disgusting.
Regardless, after that, he regularly spent his meals at her table in the dining hall. The rest of his team quickly followed suit.
Hiiii. This is going to be a very very very short fic, maybe like three or four chapters, and I'm still deliberating how to end it. I couldn't get her as a character out of my head, but in all honesty I was too lazy to write out a full fic that included everything in canon in detail along with characters, so instead you're just getting a short story that predominantly focuses on Levi and Hana's moments. Significant moments in their relationship. I hope that's okay!