My head hurt. That was the first thing I was aware of. I slowly opened my eyes and rubbed the crustiness from them. The room blurred into focus. I rolled over onto my back and sat up, trying to stop the world from spinning my closing my eyes again. When it had settled, I opened them and blinked. I was in a bed and it wasn't mine. I slowly pushed the sheets off of myself and stood up. I steadied myself as I walked out into the living room.

Will was sitting at the table, eating pancakes. He looked up as I walked in.

"You're up," he said, putting down his fork. "How do you feel?"

"Like I got hit by a shuttlecraft," I told him. I pulled out a chair and slid into it, holding my head in my hands.

"You, uh, drank a lot."

I nodded. I remembered that much of it. "I'm sorry I took your bed." I didn't remember that part.

"It's fine. I slept on the couch."

I looked at the couch and saw a blanket thrown across it. "Sorry," I muttered. I climbed to my feet and ordered a water from the replicator.

"You should try the pancakes."

"I don't know if I can handle food right now," I told him. I took a drink of the water and relished its coldness. I sat back down and looked at him. "You don't look great, either."

"I look better than you do," Riker said. He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to get it to lie flat.

"Touche." I reached over and took a piece of bacon off his plate. As I munched on it, I surveyed Will. He was wearing his uniform again and looked like he had showered. He has dark circles under his eyes, like he hadn't gotten a good night's sleep. He probably hadn't.

"You know, you could have made me take the couch."

"How much do you remember about last night?"

I grimaced. "Not all of it," I admitted.

"You were quite adamant about sleeping in the bed."

"Ah." I looked down. "Was there anything else I should be embarrassed about?" To my surprise, Riker's face colored a little under his beard. "Oh no."

"It's nothing."

"It looks like something."

"No, you just, er, tried to kiss me."

I put my head in my hands and leaned down on my elbows. "I'm so sorry."

Will laughed. "It's fine. I have to go, though. I'm on duty."

He stood up and disappeared out the door, leaving me to stare at his empty plate. Well, now I was just embarrassed. I checked the hallway and, finding it empty, slipped back into my own quarters. In the shower, I tried to remember what had happened last night. Nope, it was a blank. I had not drunk in over a year so I should have known that my alcohol tolerance would be low. Instead, we had drained the whole bottle. I supposed I was lucky that I had woken up in bed alone. I groaned and leaned against the shower wall.

Did I have feelings for Will? I didn't think I did. I liked him as a person. We had bonded when I'd been on board a year and a half previous but, really, we hadn't spent that much time together. A few days here and there. They had been emotionally charged and action-packed days, but it was still not enough time to truly get to know him. I was touched that he had finally come to my rescue after a year on Sandor, but that didn't mean I had romantic feelings for me.

I wasn't sure how he felt about me. He had kissed me last year but I got the feeling that he kissed a lot of people. He cared about me, obviously, but I didn't get any romantic vibes from him. I wondered if he had been as drunk as me last night. Probably not, I figured, as he seemed less hungover this morning.

I was just happy that he hadn't actually let me kiss him.

I climbed out of the shower and into a clean set of clothes. I didn't particularly want to dwell on it. Obviously, nothing was going to happen, regardless of how either of us felt. I would be off the Enterprise soon. The thought made my gut clench. I had no idea where I would go, but I knew I couldn't stay here. I was surprised that Picard had let me come on board at all. I supposed that Will must have put in a good word for me.

I stretched out on the couch, towel drying my hair. I felt better. Despite the upset stomach, I thought the previous night had done me good. I no longer had the clenching pain in my heart. My visit to Beverly the day before had also helped as my wound didn't hurt anymore. I checked under my shirt. Not even a scar.

It was almost as if it hadn't happened.

I tossed aside the towel. I wasn't sure what business I had getting drunk when my future was a completely blank slate, but there it was. I had always had uncertainty in my life, moving from job to job and place to place. But for some reason, it seemed worse now. Now I didn't have the one thing that made me who I was, the one thing that protected me when all the world seemed to be against me.

With a snort of dark humor, I wondered if I would be welcomed back to Sandorian society now that I could no longer shapeshift. Most likely. And I had received the Silver Moon in my absence. Maybe I was a hero.

I was spiraling into dark thoughts when the doorbell rang. Assuming it was Will, I called out to him to come up. I hopped to my feet when Picard entered.

"Captain."

"Miss Lawrence. Please, sit down."

Picard looked around the room and then pulled out a chair and sat down. I slowly settled back on the couch, looking at him uncertainly. Maybe he had come to yell at me.

"I'm glad to see you're doing well. Will told me about your injury. It was a brave thing you did."

"Thank you," I said. "It was probably stupid, though."

"Sometimes the line between bravery and stupidity is a fine one," Picard said. He leaned back in the chair. "I've come to talk to you about your future on the Enterprise."

"I know you want me to leave," I said pre-emptively. "I'll be gone at the next planet that you can drop me off at."

Picard raised his eyebrows. "I had something different in mind."

I stared at him. "I assumed you'd want me off your ship after what happened."

"I must admit, I have a hard time forgiving what happened. But after speaking with Will, I understand that you were under duress. And in the past year, you've more than paid for it. I have a proposition for you."

"A proposition?"

"Sandor has requested entry into the Federation. Obviously, that will be a very long road after what happened last year. But the Federation Council is considering it. I've been assigned to asses them. I want your help."

"My help?"

"I spoke with Prime Minister Grey this morning. He said that he would appreciate your input as we work through the issues to be addressed before they could be considered for entry."

I could feel the dark abyss yawning open inside me. "Sebastian said that." I sighed. Why couldn't the man just let me go? "I don't know, Captain, I don't think that's a good idea."

"I thought you might say that," Picard said. "I've been ordered to give you an offer: you can help with the process and, in return, you'll be forgiven for your attack on the Enterprise. You'll be free to come and go on the Enterprise and on Federation worlds."

"So, it's an ultimatum," I said. "Why don't you just arrest me?"

Picard sighed. Now that I was paying attention, his face was strained. "I'm not happy about this, Tasha. I didn't want to involve you. But Grey is insisting and the Federation is on his side. I'm not going to keep you here if you want to leave. But you might have trouble on Federation worlds or space stations in the future. I honestly don't know if they would press the issue."

I leaned back into the couch. "So, I help you and you let me stay here? Or drop me off on some planet?"

"Wherever you want," Picard said. "And I doubt that it will take long here, a week at most. We simply need to asses their current policies and give them recommendations on changes. Then, in a year, a Federation representative will come back and make the final judgement."

"That doesn't sound too bad," I said hesitantly. I had no desire to see Sebastian again but if it meant that the Federation wouldn't hold my hijacking against me, who was I to argue? Besides, I reasoned, things could not really get any worse. And Sandor had no more use for me now that I had lost my shapeshifting abilities. They wouldn't want me back.

"I'll do it."

"Excellent." Picard rose and I followed suit. "I promise you, we won't put you in a situation where they can take you like last year. And if you feel it is too much, you can stop attending the proceedings."

"Thank you," I said gratefully."

"And you're welcome to either stay in your quarters or roam the Enterprise. I trust you won't try to commandeer her again?"

"I….no, definitely not," I spluttered. Had that been a joke?

Picard turned and left, leaving me standing with a hand on my chest. My heart hurt. I took a few deep breaths. It seemed that just as soon as I thought I was out of a situation, something happened and I was right back in. It was exhausting and terrifying. I took a few more deep breaths and sat down. I was okay. I could do this. I wouldn't be put in a situation where I would need my shapeshifting, anyway. Picard had promised.

And I would have to trust him. We would stay on the ship, I assumed. Sebastian would have to come up here. I could handle being in the same room as the man for a week. And he had apologized the last time I had seen him. As if that meant anything.

I stayed in my quarters the rest of the day. I was still tired, both from my injury and from the drinking the night before. I napped on the couch and then in the bed. Finally, disorientated and half asleep, I rolled over and turned on the lights.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"1650," the computer returned.

I had slept most of the day away. I got up and tried to unwrinkled my clothes. If I could shift, I could just change into something new. But no, that kind of thinking would get me nowhere. Instead, I just straightened my shirt and pants. That would have to do.

Something was beeping, I realized. That must have been what woke me up. I narrowed it down to the replicator and pushing the blinking button.

"Tasha?"

"Will?"

"Is everything okay?"

"It's fine," I told him. "I was asleep."

"Oh, sorry. I wanted to see if you wanted to get dinner. We need to talk."

That sounded ominous. "Sure."

"Ten minutes, meet you in Ten Forward."

"Alright."

The light on the replicator went out. I would really have to see about getting a communicator like the last time I was onboard. Although, now they should be able to track me, now that I wasn't a shapeshifter any longer.

"Stop it," I muttered to myself. I ran a few fingers through my hair and left my quarters. In this form, my hair went down to my shoulders. I shuttered at the thought of getting a haircut. I hadn't had to have a haircut since I was seventeen. They made us get them twice a year at the rehabilitation center that I had lived in from thirteen to seventeen. Since then, I had just shifted it longer or shorter.

Ten Forward was less busy than it had been the night before. For that, I was grateful. I had to attest some of my testiness to the noise level. I didn't do well around crowds. I found an empty table near the window and sat down. The stars streaked by outside. I watched them, mesmerized, until I realized a waiter had appeared.

"Oh, hi. Do you have orlita?"

The waiter nodded. "We actually just added it to the library today."

"I'll take that, then. Thanks."

Just added it today. That had to be because of Sebastian. Maybe the Enterprise was going to try to make a good impression for their guests. Maybe ordering the drink wasn't such a good idea. It reminded me of when Sebastian had served it to me in his shapeshifter prison. I wanted to put my head down and cry. It seemed like everywhere I turned, there was another bad memory.

"Hey, how was your day?"

Will slipped into the seat across from me.

"It was fine," I told him. "I slept for most of it."

"I'm sure you needed it. Because of your injury," Will clarified when I opened my mouth to protest. "Not because of last night."

"Oh. Yeah, you're probably right." I tried to fight a blush creeping up my cheeks at the mention of last night. If Will was willing to forget the attempted kiss, then so was I. And I didn't even remember it in the first place.

"What did you get?" Will asked when the waiter set the glass in front of me.

"Orlita. It's a drink from Sandor."

"Looks interesting. I'll have the same."

I sipped the clear liquid. It had the tangy flavor I remembered, just without the alcohol.

"You said you needed to talk about something?" I asked, remembering.

"I do." Will frowned. "I talked to the Captain this morning, before he came to see you. He told me about the plan. I'm sorry, Tasha. I had no idea that this would happen. When Grey reached out to us yesterday, I assumed you would be kept out of it. That's why I didn't mention it."

I held up a hand to stop him. "It's alright," I said. "I told Picard that I was willing to help. It'll be fine."

"It doesn't seem fair, considering what he did to you."

"I know." I sighed. "I don't know why he wants me there. But I'm guessing you won't let him kidnap me this time."

Will's hand formed a fist on the table. "I won't."

"Good. Then we'll be fine. Picard said it will only take a week. I can handle that."

Will nodded. "Good. I was worried. After…what happened, I didn't know if you would be up for it."

"I have to move on at some point," I pointed out. I took another drink of the orlita. "After this, I can find somewhere to settle and move on with my life."

"That was something else I wanted to talk to you about. Oh, thank you." Will took the glass from the waiter. "I'll have a sirloin with potatoes."

"I'll have a pot pie," I said. "Chicken."

Will turned back to me. "What are you going to do after this week?"

"I have no idea," I said honestly. I took another drink to delay whatever question Will was going to ask next.

"You could stay here for a while."

"I could," I agreed, nodding. "It seems like Picard will let me after I help you guys out. Maybe I can hang around until I figure out where I want to go."

"You could stay here," Will repeated.

"And what, wait bar?" I sighed. "I need time, I think, to figure out what I want to do."

"After this week, we can talk about it," Will said.

"Sounds good. I just need time to adjust. And get through this thing with Sebastian. I swear, the man's haunting me."

Will frowned. "Do you think he had a motive to asking you to be part of the talks?"

"I don't know. Maybe he really wants my input. But I don't see why he would."

"I don't like it."

"I don't like him," I said. I took another drink. "But I'll deal with it. When's the first meeting?"

"Tomorrow at 1300. We're meeting in the Observation Lounge with Grey and some of his associates. You shouldn't have to do much."

"That's good at least."

Our food arrived and I took a bite of the steaming hot pot pie. It was delicious. We ate in silence for a while.

"It's good to have you back," Will said suddenly. I swallowed and looked up at him. He had a strange look on his face.

"It's good to be back," I said earnestly. Honestly, anywhere was better than being trapped on Sandor but the Enterprise had held a special place in my heart since I had first come aboard a year and a half ago. I put down my fork, food finished.

"Well, I need to go. I have to finish reviewing the protocols for tomorrow."

"Protocols?"

"There's a standard list of requirements for entry to the Federation. It's been a while since we've done this so I don't remember them all."

"Ah. Have fun with that. I think I'll stay here a while."

Will nodded and left. I sat looking out at the star lines. Tomorrow was going to be interesting. The last time I had seen Sebastian, he had apologized to me and thanked me for saving his life. For the first time since we'd been reunited, we had been on equal footing. He had had no power over me. It would be the same tomorrow. And that was something that I could handle. I would have to.

I took a deep breath. Tomorrow would be a big day. I was ready for it.