A/N: Against all the odds, I've found myself sucked back into the HP fandom, via some incredible WolfStar fics...made me want to try to resurrect this story. No promises on updates, sorry! If I come up with more chapters, I will gladly write and post them.

iIi

"He reminds me of Moony," James whispered. He didn't have any illusions of privacy, but it made him feel a bit better to pretend his every word wasn't overhead. "And he's so young-looks like a 4th year, don't you think? No way he's of age-"

"I've seen them even younger, out the window," Lily said darkly. "Saw two kids dragging a third down the road yesterday. All three with battle wounds and baby fat. We landed in a hell where children are hired soldiers." The babe in her arms whimpered, and she relaxed the hold she'd unconsciously tightened around him, kissing apologies onto his downy head.

Naruto was a very cute baby. Everything else about escaping death via alternate dimension was-well, it sucked. They were prisoners. They didn't speak the language. Their wands had been taken, and would likely never be returned. And without them-even if they managed wandless spells-they were no match for the magical warriors who always, always watched them. Like the one sitting at the kitchen table, flipping through dictionaries at an incredible speed, creepy red-back eye spinning like vinyl on a record player. It was hard to tell, between the face mask and the headband and the gravity-defying grey hair, but James didn't think he was wrong about the gangly limbs and awkward posture being symptoms of a teenaged growth spurt. Between the beanpole body, prominent facial scar, and the haunted look to his all-too-human grey eye-not the creepy-ass red one he was scanning dictionaries with-their guard really did remind James of Remus. Heartbroken 5th year Remus, to be exact.

Nothing good lay along that train of thought. Nothing good lay along most trains of thought. Harry...

But Naruto really was adorable, and a needy newborn gave James and Lily something to do. Naruto guzzled milk like the World Cup depended on it, pooped a lot, slept a lot, burped obligingly when encouraged to, and-just in the last two days-began offering up big, gummy smiles.

That was when their guard started...hanging out with them. He'd made his presence known quite viciously at first-squatting on the ceiling, haunting corners, making a show of sharpening his deadly daggers and ninja stars. Went from invisible to snatching Naruto right out of James's arms in less than a second, and didn't give the baby back or remove the blade from Jame's throat until James managed to communicate that he'd only been reaching for a kitchen knife to puncture the seal on a stubborn can of baby formula. 'Hanging out' was a very generous description of the ninja's broody presence, but it was refreshingly relaxed by comparison.

The dictionaries were delivered via toad, along with several beginning English textbooks, packets of tea and biscuits that Lily nearly wept with joy over, and a note from Sirius-which they did weep over. Both of them.

I'm a hostage, I think, Padfoot wrote. But I'm finding I don't mind too much. They've got Snivellus too, and he keeps acting up and pissing her off-the woman-if he hasn't learnt his lesson by now, he never will, eh? But Harry's happy. They treat him like gold. I hold him as much as I can, play with him. He's eating and sleeping and playing. He'll be alright. Please-please be alright, Lily, Prongs, go along with whatever you need to, if they'll keep letting us send messages like this-that's enough. I think they might let me try a translation charm soon. See if they'll let me send a message to Moony. I'm worried about him...

As was James. Maybe that's why he kept seeing Remus in the studious young shinobi teaching himself English at a worn kitchen table. There was a note with dictionaries too, in carefully scripted English. For Kakashi, it said. Lily and James also. Kakashi will use fast.

Lily had taken that as a bit of a challenge. She had no supernatural red eye to scan with, of course, but James knew her far too well to bet against her.

iIi

The climate was absolutely horrible-cold, wet, and dark-but with a shinigami's gastric juices as the alternative, Minato decided he quite liked his new dimension's endless, bone-chilling rain. He'd had no trouble finding supplies; once he'd scouted the terrain, located roads and the towns they led to, and placed hiraishin markers in shops and the local medical clinic, it was no trouble at all to find food and clothing. Good blades were hard to come by, and he had yet to source a decent tent, but keeping himself, Kushina, little Harry, and even his hostages warm and dry and fed was not a problem. He quite enjoyed the challenge of building bigger and better shelters using various earth-style techniques. The latest one even had a climbing structure with shallow tunnels and a small slide for Harry-chan to enjoy. Anything to distract the little one from the grief and fear of missing his parents.

At some point, though, they would need to find a more permanent solution. He didn't want to provide for his family only by stealing, or for Harry-chan to grow up in hiding, and he certainly didn't want to keep his hostages indefinitely. They were ill-behaved and wanted to kill each other; terrible examples for Harry, both of them. He couldn't afford to grow complacent in his daily battles with the old man with the boots and the beard-that one did not show the physical prowess of a shinobi, but he was patient, powerful, and creative, and seemed to be gaining allies by the day. This impasse needed to end.

To this end, Minato set out to be found. This was easier than he would like it to be. All he had to do was step beyond the boundaries of Kushina's brilliant protective seal-work-or teleport to an unprotected hiraishin marker, as he did now-and the old man would find him.

"Hello," Minato began, offering a friendly smile. He'd already dodged one attack; now the old man lowered his jutsu-stick, watching Minato with cold, cunning blue eyes. A series of pops and cracks brought the man's allies: the man with one leg and mis-matched eyes, the woman with a severe gaze behind square spectacles and exceptional aim; the young couple who fought as a team and, when they didn't know Minato was observing them, shared a kiss. They all looked very tired, and very fierce.

Minato nodded to each in turn, then added a polite bow for good measure. "For you," he said, holding out the letter from Harry's parents. Naruto's new guardians. They had written everything he'd asked. And the pictures Kakashi had taken, showing the Potters alive and well, safe in Konohagakure.

Minato placed the letter carefully on the forest floor, then backed away. The old man raised his jutsu-stick, and Minato coiled to leap-but the stick was clearly pointed at the letter, and with a murmured word, the papers flew to the old man's hands.

There was a great deal of muttering over the contents of the letter. Also gasping, staring, and weeping. These people seemed entirely incapable of hiding their feelings-well, apart from their leader, whose icy eyes watched Minato as creepily as ever.

"Also," Minato said into the first good pause, very careful with the pronunciation-"for you." He pulled a summoning scroll from his belt, unfurled it on the damp forest floor, and activated it it with a hand seal. The uglier, grumpier hostage appeared in a poof of smoke, bound and gagged. Minato hiraishined away, glad to be rid of one of the more annoying elements of this new dimension.

Ideally, the return of a hostage and proof of their own people's well-being would lay the groundwork for productive peace talks; either way, Minato was not at all sad to lose the one called Snape; he kept trying to kill Kushina, and while fending him off gave her something to do, Minato could only witness this so many times before he killed the man himself.

Tomorrow the real games would begin. Minato smiled; negotiating was one of his favorite games.