Chapter 27
"We die a little every day and by degrees we're reborn into different men, older men in the same clothes, with the same scars."
― Mark Lawrence, King of Thorns
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January 24th, 2045
Dear Dean:
I remembered a bedtime story I used to read to DJ when he was five or six years old. It is not entirely happy, but I didn't write it. It is a book that hides a very important lesson in between the letters it contains. I thought it was too good not to add it to his growing book collection back then.
It is about a boy who wanted to be a superhero, but he couldn't fly away. The ceiling was the main obstacle that kept him from doing so. His parents didn't know he was not a normal boy. One day, he woke up to the sky facing him. He had flown away from his bed while sleeping, and woke up in a different place. The kid was excited but scared at the same time. He was calling for his mother and father, but there was no one around to guide him. Later, it occurred him that he could fly to find his house again.
Long story short, he went back home without a single scratch on his body, realizing he was happy with the four walls that contained him, because that was the place where his heart was. He had tasted freedom; however, the boy still chose to go back to his parents so he could feel safe. He could not be a superhero yet. He was just a kid who needed to learn how to love what he had to be a real superhero. If he didn't appreciate it, he would never be happy, even if he could fly to the place where he wanted to be. He no longer felt the need to fly away again.
You got the general idea of the story now. It will be important for you to remember that. Do I sound like a teacher?
Sorry, man. I blame it on the force of habit , due to the large amount of children that I said the same thing to over and over again while I worked in different schools..
When I read it to my son, he happily yelled that he wanted to fly, but be home by the end of the day. He told me he was happy in his room and with us, too. Miracle was sleeping by his side while we talked before turning the lights off. The book was not supposed to have an open ending, or that is how I saw it.
I created an alternative ending for him, and he liked it. The boy flies to the sky within his mind every day, and he is very happy seeing the world through his curious eyes. He imagines birds and angels floating around the white clouds. On gray days, he watches the rain hitting the grass of his back porch, and wonders if the sky cries because it misses him being by its side.
I know it is sugary coated, but I enjoy that ending better than the one that the book tells. I am that boy, and sometimes, I fly away towards you. You are a bird or a cloud. You are the rain and the wind. Now, DJ is reading another kind of books and has a girlfriend. Her name is Laurel.
She is a very nice girl. I know it will make him happy.
The reason why I wrote you about this is not because I feel the need to talk about a sad book. If I had to tell one, I would write it. I bet we would be highly appreciated characters.
I am confused. Truth is that I don't know what's wrong with me, and I hope that you can help me figure it out.
Last week I started waking up in weird places. Away from my house, I mean. Today I woke up in the Bunker. God knows how I got there with no car, or how I got inside.
I was lying in my old bed, which is clearly as uncomfortable as it used to be before I left the place. DJ kept the key where I left it, so I know where it is hidden. Since I had no battery to call Gen, I was forced to turn on the lights of the Bunker. It hit me in the heart. The place looked too alive to be true. Sometimes I think that it was all a good dream, and then I wake up to you being a slave of my own sweet imagination. Our home looked a little dusty, and it was missing a table. Ignoring those details, that was the last place I wanted to be in. Your room was excessively empty. I forgot how much I needed to buy a cold beer and drink it with you until we fixed our issues. I saw the marks where your guns used to be placed. I found one of Miracle's toys underneath your bed. I cannot believe I missed it.
Once I called Gen, she came to pick me up, making me feel guilty. We are still working on our relationship. We figured out that we were broken pieces that still matched, and they had to be reunited. We have had plenty of dates, yet, it feels like I am being given a second chance to know her feelings about me.
She hugged me as soon as she saw me waiting outside the Bunker, telling me she thanked God I was fine. Physically fine, anyway.
I have not talked a lot about you aloud lately, so today I went to the cemetery with her, hoping to find the right combination of feelings that would let me cry your death. Gen sat by me and hugged me as I trembled against her smaller body. You were right when you said I was too tall.
Unexpectedly, I said I was ready to leave everything behind, so I could see you once more. Gen responded that I could not join you yet, because she needed me and I needed her as well. Our son needed us to be here.
I drove us back to Lawrence, while Gen and DJ planned to install sensors around the house to stop me from walking away. She suggested I might need to see a doctor if this keeps happening. Everything should be okay. If not, I have a plan 'B'.
Don't worry about that. You will know it when/if the time comes around.
The day is about to end, and I have not said anything that matters yet.
Happy birthday, brother. Love you, man.
Sammy
Author's Note: Hey guys. Sorry for not updating sooner. I am going through a lot, and sometimes, pain and anger does not come out through words.
I would love to read the book Sam read to DJ. It does not exist, but I think I would buy it.
If you have a minute, please make sure to leave a review. It makes me very happy, specially these days.
Love you all
KW.-