"Ran-chan!" – Regular Speech
'Stupid Spatula Girl!' – Thoughts
"Hiryū Shōten Ha!" – Martial Arts Technique
{Grandmother!} – Mandarin/Language other than Japanese Speech
Chapter 25: Saotome Showdown?! Genma Versus Ranma!
Several Days Later
Ukyo's Apartment, Above Okonomiyaki Ucchan's
Ukyo moaned slightly as she was pinned to her futon by an amorous Amazon, her mouth once more being treated to Shampoo's mysteriously brain-bending kissing skills. This had become something of a daily habit for the Joketsuzoku Champion, who delighted in reducing the Osakan Chef to a puddle of goo simply from kissing and some light petting.
Of course, it wasn't simply Ukyo who got this treatment; Ranma received the same visits, and he barely made any perfunctory protests anymore! Significant progress in the purplette's book.
After a moment, the two girls parted, both panting from their extended make-out session.
"D-Dangit, Shampoo!" the brunette gasped as she managed to get her neurons working again. "You said that Ran-chan was your first real kiss, so how the heck are you so dang good at it? I've kissed more than you and Ran-chan have together and you still make me melt like a first time kisser every single time?!"
Amusement danced in Shampoo's eyes. "That would be telling. I believe the saying is 'a girl has to have some secrets', no?"
Ukyo huffed at that before quickly bucking her hips and dislodging Shampoo. The brunette quickly turned the tables on the Amazon, so that she was now the one pinning Shampoo down.
"Oh no, now I've been caught. Whatever will you do to me?" Shampoo said coquettishly, fluttering her eyes at her fiancée.
A flurry of possible answers came to the Osakan Chef at that particular moment, each more lewd than the last, but she managed to tamp down on most of them, settling on, "Oh, there's a lot I could do, but I'll settle for this, sugar."
Then she leaned down and hungrily stole another kiss from Shampoo.
After Ukyo satisfied her honour by being the dominant one for a change, she went through her morning ablutions and got dressed for school in her usual outfit. Getting changed while Shampoo was there made things...interesting, but Ukyo was nothing if not determined. She would admit to herself that it did give her something of a thrill though.
"So how're things at the Nekohanten?" Ukyo asked as she walked alongside her Amazon fiancée as they headed to meet up with Ranma.
"Busy, busy. It's a good chance to practice Martial Arts Waitressing, but stupid boys keep trying to grab my butt." Shampoo groused. Not that the unworthy idiots ever managed to grab it, but it was the principle of the matter!
"Yeah, they keep tryin' that with Ran-chan when he works over at my place." the Chef scowled. "And it ain't just kids our age; a salaryman tried the other day!"
"Old pervert." the Joketsuzoku girl snorted in disgust.
"In a way, I can't really blame him...Ran-chan's female form's cute as a button." Ukyo admitted. "But considerin' Ran-chan's taken, by us no less, I can blame them."
The two girls shared a smirk at the fact they were the ones to lay claim to Ranma. Akane was well and truly out of the running, and Kodachi had been kept busy by training for more Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics for the past while...not to mention the fact that she was as crazy as her brother.
"Hey Shampoo, Ucchan!" their fiancé called out to them from his tent, looking relaxed and pleased to see them. A good change from the wary and cautious attitude he'd had before the Love-Aid Bandage Incident.
"Mornin', Ran-chan." Ukyo greeted him with a hug, one that Shampoo joined in on.
"Nihao, Airen!" the purplette purred as she snuggled into her two spouses-to-be.
"Wow, what happened to your tent, Ran-chan?" the brunette blinked as she disengaged (reluctantly) from the hug and set eyes on her fiancé's tent. It was covered in childish drawings that were half-washed off, mostly having to do with 'idiot stinky head!' and 'ungrateful disciple!'
"Happōsai." Ranma sighed as the trio started to head to school. "He came in, doodled all over my tent, left while I was asleep, then taunted me when I got up to go to the sentō this morning. What a pain..."
The diminutive Grandmaster of Anything Goes had yet to forgive Ranma for the incident at the Akuryōnaie Hotel, and had been enacting many petty and spiteful little pranks...once he'd healed up from being blasted off like a cannonball and slamming into a mountain.
"I'll talk to grandmother." Shampoo scowled. "She's getting tired of him meddling like this."
"I think everyone has for the last two-hundred years, Shampoo." Ukyo remarked dryly. "Especially the women of Japan and China."
Her companions nodded fervently in agreement.
Soon, Shampoo had to bid her Airens farewell as they arrived at Fūrinkan shortly thereafter. She didn't really mind having to part ways with them; she'd been educated in practically everything she needed to know while growing up in Nyucheizu, which involved a lot more modern knowledge than some people (Akane, Nabiki, that fat fool Genma...) could have imagined. Thanks to a few low-level memorisation-aid tricks, it hadn't been hard.
No, she had little to no desire to bore herself to death learning thing she either knew or wouldn't use once she and her spouses returned to China.
With a spring in her step, the Amazon Champion headed home to start her shift in the Nekohanten. Today was a good day in her book!
Later That Day
Tendo Residence
The atmosphere around the Tendo Household had been tense for multiple reasons. One was that Akane was still fuming after walking in on Ranma cuddling with Ukyo and Shampoo in the Akuryōnaie Hotel's video room. Another was that Sōun had actually enjoyed himself (once Happōsai had been removed from the equation) and had played a few enjoyable games of shōgi with Ranma, which made Genma irked at him for being so friendly with 'that rebellious Boy' when they were trying to get him to obey them.
The biggest reason for the tension, however, was that Happōsai was in an absolutely foul mood. He had been beaten and humiliated by Ranma, Ukyo and Shampoo, aided and abetted by Cologne, much to his growing frustration.
Happōsai was not used to being stymied so much by one group of people. Usually he was the one making others feel frustrated! Having the boot on the other foot, as it were, was not a pleasant experience.
The diminutive Grandmaster of Anything Goes, when he wasn't out on one of his panty and bra stealing raids, locked himself up in 'his' room in the Tendo home and plotting on how to get even with Ranma (the girls were secondary in his mind, as Ranma was his official heir and thus the main problem).
He was absently organising his vast collection of pilfered panties and 'borrowed' bras when an evil little idea came to him, one that would both punish Ranma and leave Happōsai himself without having to be seen as the bad one. As a bonus, he had even thought of a plan to keep punishing Ranma even if the boy managed to do his usual 'come out of it smelling of roses' routine that he'd been doing recently.
"Kehehehehe..." Happōsai cackled. "Ranma...! You should never underestimate the cunning of the elderly!"
Elsewhere, both Cologne and Ranma felt both a shiver down their spines and an incipient headache brewing for some reason.
With Genma
"Checkmate!"
"Now hold on, Tendo-kun!"
The pudgy Master of the Saotome School of Anything Goes frantically scanned the shōgi board before slumping in defeat. "You have gotten better, Tendo-kun."
"Hahaha...I taught Ukyo and Shampoo the basics of shōgi at the Akuryōnaie Hotel, Saotome-kun." Sōun said with a smile as he stroked his moustache smugly. "That made me reconsider the basics of the game more. Just like with martial arts, the fundamentals are indeed key."
Genma grumbled, but put it aside with a sour face. Things had NOT being going to plan, not at all. He had steadily been losing more and more control over The Boy, and there was nothing he could do about it. He hadn't been able to corner him at that dratted out-of-season hotel, and that old hag kept fighting him off when he tried to get his hands on the marriage forms.
He had to get The Boy to recognise his place, and soon. Otherwise, his wife would no doubt try to enforce that dratted Seppuku pact that he'd foolishly signed. How had he been supposed to know that Nodoka would go more than slightly round the bend in their absence? They'd only been on the road a little over a decade since the pact was signed! All of the letters she'd sent him had gotten steadily more...worrying...as the years went on, and he was fairly certain that by this point, she was absolutely serious about carrying out the dratted thing.
No, he would not die like that, thank you very much. Genma was lazy and unambitious for the most part, but his ability to sense a threat to his survival had been something which had always been master-class; thus he just KNEW that Ranma's Jusenkyō Curse would be seen by Nodoka as an automatic failure of the 'manliest among men' clause of the contract.
'The Boy would doubtless follow his mother's wishes if she demanded it of him, thanks to his 'honour' and the like.' the panda-morph thought sourly. 'Matters must be taken in hand, quickly. He doesn't realise that his life hangs in the balance...and more importantly, my own!'
Never let it be said that Saotome Genma didn't have a solid list of priorities...as skewed, lazy and self-centred as they might be.
"Genma!" a familiar and dreaded voice said, and the pudgy man visibly flinched before he slowly turned to face the diminutive form of his Master.
"Y-Yes, Master?" he said nervously.
"It's been far too long since Ranma challenged you for his mastery. Why have you not responded to it?" Happōsai demanded.
"M-Master, there have been more than a few incidents which have taken up our time." Genma answered, amazingly only stuttering at the first word.
"Excuses, excuses." the pint-sized martial artist scoffed. "Genma, I want you to arrange a match with Ranma by the end of the month! No excuses, and not trying to finagle your way out of it! No cats and no cold water! And at least try to put up a good fight!"
"Y-Yes, Master." the panda-morph reluctantly acquiesced. Inside, he was furiously plotting on how to turn this disaster in his favour.
Over in the kitchen, Kasumi sighed. She tended to stay in the background of things, but she did have opinions about what happened around her; she just tended to not voice them, to remove one more source of stress from everyone around her.
'Oh Akane. If you were just more honest with yourself and Ranma-kun, he would still be with you.' the home-maker thought sadly. She quite liked Ranma...not as a boy, but as a potential brother-in-law. He was rough around the edges, yes, but he was kind and honourable, praise which few boys at Fūrinkan could earn from her.
Now though, it was clear (to anyone who wasn't Akane, their father and Saotome Genma) that the union of the Saotome and Tendo Schools wouldn't take place in this generation. Kasumi took heart in the fact that at least her father was starting to realise that the joining wouldn't happen between Ranma and Akane.
Sighing again, the oldest of the Tendo daughters continued to work on the preparations for lunch. A home-maker's job was never done, it seemed.
Later
Outside Fūrinkan Highschool
Once more, the students of Fūrinkan were treated to the sight of Saotome Genma's panda form wrestling with a tire. Mutters sprung up as a few students recalled the last time that the panda-morph had come to the school.
"Aw fer...what're ya doing here for now, Pop?" Ranma asked as he leapt nimbly over the crowd, with Ukyo following at his heels. The bifauxnen was glaring at the fat panda angrily, as she too remembered what he had done the last time he came to Fūrinkan, not to mention the amount of emotional pain he had put her Ran-chan through. If he thought he could come here and do something like that again, he had another thing coming!
A splash of hot water later, and a quick change of clothes, and Saotome Genma put on his best 'serious martial artist imposing stance', which was kind of wasted given the panda act he had been putting on just a few moments previously.
"Ranma, the time has come for a true test of your skills as a martial artist!" the pudgy man proclaimed, pointing at his son dramatically.
"Now what're you blabbing about?" the pigtailed martial artist asked flatly, crossing his arms indifferently.
"Do you not recall your challenge to me when you defeated Ryōga?" Genma prodded.
"Yer gonna have ta narrow it down a bit, Pop." Ranma said dryly. "I've beaten ol' Pork Chop more times than a drum."
(In Nagoya (actually Okinawa), one Hibiki Ryōga felt the urge to throttle his rival. As he got such urges on an increasingly frequent basis, he paid it no mind.)
Genma looked aggravated. "Challenging me for your mastery, Boy!"
"Oh, that?" Ranma smacked his fist into his open palm in realisation. "Wait, now?"
"No, idiot Boy!" his father barked. "I'm notifying you that it will take place on the last day of the month! You have until then to train to the limit and prove that you are worthy of earning the title of a Master of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts!"
"Jeez, where's he gettin' his lines from?" Ukyo scoffed. "Late-onset Chūnibyō?"
WHAM!
"Who's a Chūnibyō?!" Genma growled after he got up after faceplanting on the ground.
"I dunno, Pop." Ranma drawled unconcernedly. "Why not here and now? Seems like a better idea than me waiting for you desperately tryin' to come up with a plan or a plot to win. What's it gonna be? A c-cat again? Puppet someone else in the fight? Hire Pantyhose Taro ta fight me in his Cursed Form?"
"Humph. Do you really think that I need such underhanded tactics to defeat you?" the fat man scoffed.
"Yup."
"Definitely."
WHAM!
Genma faceplanted again at Ranma and Ukyo's instant and unhesitating reply. They showed absolutely no hesitation in affirming their lack of belief in him! He was a Master martial artist! He deserved more respect than this!
"Look here, Boy!" the Saotome master growled as he stood up. "It is only through my benevolence that you are even being granted this opportunity! Show some respect, or I might withdraw my agreement!"
"I'm the Old Perv's heir, remember?" Ranma said scornfully. "I'm the Heir to the Grandmaster's position, so if I skip a Master rank, it's an inconvenience, yeah, but going from a regular martial artist to a grandmaster in one fell swoop? Now that sounds kinda cool."
Genma glowered at him. "Fah. Do as you will. The last day of the month, at the Tendo Dojo. We shall see who is worthy of the title of mastery then, Boy."
With that, he turned and walked away.
"What the heck got into him?" Ukyo asked with a frown. "It ain't like him to get off his butt to do something like this for no reason."
"Happōsai, I'll betcha a hundred yen." the pigtailed martial artist said with an irritated look on his face. "The ol' perv's still pissed at me, so he's sending my old man to do his dirty work."
The engaged pair leapt over the crowd and headed back inside as they talked.
"You don't have to take him up on it." the Chef pointed out. "It's an obvious trap."
"Yeah, but even though I said all that about jumpin' to the grandmaster's position, Happōsai ain't gonna keel over any time soon." Ranma answered as they stopped in an unused classroom to talk privately. "Heck, it wouldn't surprise me if the old pervert outlived my grandchildren. That's even if he ever intend ta actually pass the title on, considerin' how much of a loose cannon he is, even for a wanderin' martial artist! No, I have to earn a Master's position if I want to be free from my Pop interfering with me anymore, which means I have ta walk into this trap."
"How does that work?" Ukyo asked.
"Because, son or not, if I'm an equal Master of a separate branch of the Saotome School, Pop can't just demand my respect and for me to jump at his command." Ranma explained. "Unlike a lotta modern martial artists nowadays, the Saotome Branch of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts doesn't run accordin' ta government laws and stuff, needin' a certificate in teachin' and in PE to teach stuff; we follow the path of the wandering martial artist, where everyone works on respect and mutual acknowledgement."
"Huh...Cologne teach ya that?" the brunette asked.
"Yup." her fiancé nodded. "She told me how to get out from under my old man's thumb for the most part, and then explained why. Even if I'm his son, even if the Saotome Ranma Branch of the Anything Goes School will be considered a sub-branch of the regular Saotome Branch of Anything Goes, as a Master in my own right, the old man and Mr Tendo won't be able to order me around willy-nilly, or try to, as they have been."
"Oh!" Ukyo realised. "Because they wouldn't tolerate another Master ordering them around, they have to respect you and give you that same respect! That's brilliant, Ran-chan!"
"Heh...yeah, it's pretty kick-ass, but It'll only work if I beat my old man." Ranma said with a frown. "I know he has some things up his sleeve that he never taught me, so it ain't like I know I can win. As lazy as my old man is, he is a Master himself."
"We'll talk ta Cologne after school. She'll have a plan." the Osakan said comfortingly, hesitantly putting her hand over his. "You'll win, Ran-chan. I know it."
"Ucchan..." Ranma smiled at his 'cute' fiancée. He then reddened slightly as he realised that they were pretty close together, with Ukyo doing the same. Almost at the same time, they moved their heads closer together and gently kissed one another. It wasn't passionate, nor was it entirely chaste, but it was heartfelt.
When the two of them parted from one another, panting slightly, they were both bright red and found that Ukyo had somehow transitioned to straddling Ranma after he sat on a desk.
"Wow...that was..." Ranma said.
"Y-Yeah...that was somethin' alright." Ukyo agreed breathlessly, inwardly delighted that her Ran-chan was comfortable enough to kiss her, at school of all places! She remembered what time it was though. "Oh, w-we'd better head to class...break's almost over."
"Already? Dangit." the pigtailed boy frowned before getting up, setting Ukyo down on her feet gently in the same motion. "Well, we'd better get going then. Last thing we need is for people to start ragging on at us for no reason."
"I guess." Ukyo pouted. Stupid school, taking her away from her Ran-chan time, just when things were getting good!
After School
Backyard, Nekohanten
"Yes, that sounds like one of Happōsai's plans alright, Son-in-Law." Cologne nodded as she finished listening to Ranma giving her his reasoning about what was going on. "He isn't as lazy as Gemma is, but if he has a chance to cause trouble without having to do much himself, he usually takes that route. He hasn't changed in three-hundred years..."
"What's the plan?" Ukyo asked, dearly wanting to see the fat panda get his just desserts. Yes, she'd kicked his ass when she'd first arrived in Nerima, but watching her Ran-chan kick his was always so much more satisfying.
"We simply train Son-in-Law hard and keep an eye out for Genma trying to sabotage him." Cologne said with a smirk. "Saotome Genma is as of yet unaware of the Mōko Takabisha, and Son-in-Law has several tricks aside from that which can even the odds against him, regardless of how tricky he can be."
"How could he sabotage Ranma?" Shampoo asked with a frown.
"Make me too injured to fight. Basically pullin' a Kodachi." Ranma said with a scowl. "Is it OK if I move my tent back here until the match?"
"Certainly! Shampoo will appreciate it, no doubt." the old Matriarch cackled.
"Kodachi? As in Kuno Kodachi?" Ukyo blinked. "Dunno what you mean there, Ran-chan?"
"She cheats like crazy, is what I mean." the Saotome Heir snorted. "This is from before you two showed up; back then, Kodachi was the undefeated champion of Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics...mostly because she ambushed her opponents on the streets or in their homes beforehand and injured them to the point they couldn't fight. When Akane was dragooned inta replacing the Fūrinkan team, Kodachi actually ambushed her in her bedroom with a giant mallet."
"What the...?" Ukyo blinked in surprise. She'd obviously known that the 'Black Rose' was a few ingredients short of an okonomiyaki, but this put a slightly more solid idea on exactly how twisted she was.
"Crazy Ribbon Girl is very dishonourable." Shampoo shook her head in disapproval.
"Yeah. I dunno why she does that; she's legitimately skilled in the sport." Ranma shrugged in confusion. "I had to sub-in for Akane and fought Kodachi. She cheated like hell in the ring as well, but she was very much a good fighter inside of the restrictions of her chosen art."
"Who knows. But the important thing is, you have experience with an opponent who is not above sabotaging their competition before a match." Cologne said with a nod. "While you train yourself, I shall focus on aiding Ukyo in her attempts to practice her qigong and neigong. Shampoo, head back to Son-in-Law's camp, pack everything up and bring it back. I shall see about cleaning it for Happi's 'art' once you do..."
Two Days Later
Streets of Nerima
With preternatural reflexes, Ranma avoided the hail of tacks, leaped over the 'hastily discarded' banana peel and ducked to avoid the 'unexpectedly flying' length of wood as he made his way back to the Nekohanten after doing an errand for Cologne.
The perpetrator, a fat panda wearing a badly-fitting trenchcoat and an undersized fedora peeking out from behind a building, made Ranma want to curse him in Chinese Sailor for a while. He'd learned some of it inside of the first few weeks of being in China; his old man had made them stick around in the city they'd crawled ashore into for a while to learn some 'Martial Arts Street Fighting' techniques, and the sailors there had been only too happy to expand his vocabulary.
'Dangit, not even Kodachi was ever this persistent!' he thought sourly as he double-checked the meat that he'd just picked up.
The last couple of days had been rife with traps, 'coincidental' and 'accidental' flying objects, and the occasional group of thugs attacking him, while someone lurked in the background trying to throw stones or something to hurt his legs and arms.
Extreme for his old man, but not out of the question. Fortunately, none of the attempts had been near Ucchan's or the Nekohanten. Cologne was on watch in those areas and his old man wasn't stupid enough to provoke her without a damned good reason...too much, anyway.
His training had gone on fairly well in the last couple of days; he'd managed to fire two of his Mōko Takabisha at the same time, one from each hand. It was actually a bit of a drain on his chi, but with practice he ought to be able to manage it easier.
He was also spending some time going over everything he knew of his old man's combat style; every dirty trick he'd used, every technique in the older Saotome's repertoire, every nuance of his way of fighting...everything and anything that Saotome Genma had used or demonstrated in his son's presence.
Ranma knew that testing to become a Master was rough and never easy; his old man and Mr Tendo, for example, had regaled him and the Tendo daughters, when the two men were deep in their cups, about the fights they had taken with a fellow wandering martial artist after they had locked Happōsai away. It had, according to their drunken ramblings, taken tenacity, determination and more than a few unconventional tricks to emerge victorious.
Personally, Ranma took most things that his father boasted about drunkenly with a pinch of salt. Still, it matched up with everything he had suspected about Mastery Qualification tests, and he knew Genma would hold nothing back to deny Ranma any further freedom from him.
A very small part of Ranma, the part that was a lonely little boy who had grown up on the road with mostly only his father's company, felt saddened by this. A lying, gluttonous, egotistical, cowardly, venal, selfish jerk he may be, but Genma was his father, at the end of the day. He was the one who had raised him, trained him, and ultimately shaped Ranma into the martial artist he was right now.
Still, the rest of Ranma knew that this was necessary. It was time and past time that Genma stopped interfering in his life. He was sixteen, almost seventeen, and he was well past bowing to his father's will on almost everything.
'Them's the breaks, Pops.' he thought. 'Wonder what he's thinkin' with all of these stupid tricks...he has ta know it ain't gonna work on me...is he trying to make me irritated enough to make a mistake in the match?'
Considering the issue, the Saotome Heir thought it sounded about right. Nothing irked him more than pointless and irritating attacks over a long period of time. His old man knew that fairly well, so it was a probable tactic for him to pull. Well, now that Ranma was on to him, he'd make damn sure that his old man wouldn't get things his way.
Smirking, Ranma headed into the Nekohanten to finish his errand.
The Day Before the Match
Nekohanten
A rather frazzled Ranma sat down and started eating the chow mein that Shampoo had made him. His two fiancées looked on in concern.
"Poor Ran-chan. Genma's really not let up on him over the last couple of weeks." Ukyo frowned. The number of petty and vindictive little pranks that the elder Saotome had been using had risen to truly ridiculous levels. It had gotten to the state that the only places Ranma was safe were Okonomiyaki Ucchan's and the Nekohanten; school was no sanctuary from Genma's plotting either.
Tacks in his shoes, glue on his chair, buckets of water falling on him when he opened doors, soap on the ground to try and trip him up...the list went on. Although to be fair, Kuno, with his usual staggering lack of personal awareness, kept stumbling into the ones that didn't involve Ranma's seat or clothes. If it wasn't for the fact that Ranma's nerves were being frayed every time it happened, Ukyo would have found the antics of the 'Blue Thunder' amusing.
"Grandmother has knocked Genma out and tied him up." Shampoo said with grim satisfaction. "He'll not bother Ranma until it is time to fight tomorrow."
"Good, but...how're we gonna make Ran-chan relax?" the Osakan Chef asked with a frown. "He's jumpier than a mouse in a cat lady's house."
"I...might have an idea." Shampoo admitted, a dusting of pink covering her cheeks. "It'll work if we're both careful about it."
"What? C'mon, spill." Ukyo urged her fiancée. When the Amazon Champion did so, the brunette found herself blushing at the idea...but she wasn't against it. The main question was if Ranma would agree to it.
The Saotome Heir was finally managing to relax as he finished the food in front of him. He swore up and down for the nth time since these hellish two weeks had begun that he was going to punt his old man into LEO for what he'd been pulling. Stupid panda...
"You doin' OK, Ran-chan?" Ukyo asked as she joined him at the table, careful to not try to sneak up on him.
"I can't lie, I've been better, Ucchan." Ranma said heavily, not bothering with his usual macho bullshit. He was too mentally exhausted to try. "Pops' stupid tricks an' antics're drivin' me up th' wall, y'know? 'leastways I'm safe here."
It took Ukyo a moment to decipher that, as Ranma's brogue had dropped into even rougher territory than before. She smiled at her childhood friend-slash-fiancé warmly, a hint of a blush on her face.
"Well, sugar, me 'n' Shampoo figure you need a good rest tonight, so here's what we were plannin' on to let you relax tonight..." Ukyo smirked.
Later That Evening
Shampoo's Room, Nekohanten
Now in her Cursed Form, Ranma looked uncertain about this entire idea. Shampoo had leant her some fairly modest pyjamas, ones that looked like softer versions of the Amazon girl's regular clothing except coloured the same as the Joketsuzoku outfit Ranma had worn in the duel against Ryōga for the right to be the Saotome Heir.
"Are you two sure that this is OK?" the redhead asked uncertainly.
"Ran-chan, we are, seriously." Ukyo said, wearing her usual sleeping kimono as she brushed her hair while sat in front of Shampoo's dressing table. "We wouldn't have suggested it otherwise, and Cologne wouldn't have OK'd it otherwise either."
"The Old Ghoul would approve anythin' that got me closer ta you two." Ranma pointed out dryly.
"True, but not on the night before an important duel, beloved." Shampoo pointed out from her place seated on the edge of the bed. She wore more daring nightwear than either of her fiancées, a pair of panties and a négligé top that accentuated the shape of her bust while artfully concealing everything but a fair amount of décolletage.
That being the case, when she got up and walked over to Ukyo, Ranma's eyes couldn't help but wander across her long and silky smooth legs, her firm and taut derrière, and even her cleavage.
'Gah! What're ya doin', ya idiot!' she scolded herself, wrenching her eyes away from the very pleasant sight. 'What are ya, Kuno or Ryōga?! Get some control over yer hormones, dammit!'
Shampoo, meanwhile, had taken Ukyo's brush and was helping finish off her grooming.
"That's nice, Shampoo..." the Chef sighed happily.
"I'm glad you approve." the lavender-haired girl smiled. "This reminds me of when I helped my Shield Sisters with their hair..."
"Shield Sisters?" Ranma blinked.
"Airen, you've met them." Shampoo reminded her. "Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung."
"The twins?" the redhead said, recalling the Ōkaryū no Mai (Dance of the Great Fire Dragon), Chō Hōō (Super Phoenix) and Chō Hōō Hi no Mai (Super Phoenix Fire Dance) techniques that they'd used. It irked her to admit that it was thanks to Akane being totally tone deaf that they'd managed to beat the first one, and thanks to Akane whacking exploding eggs away like in baseball that the last two had been beaten.
"Yes. They're my Shield Sisters." the Amazon said as she finished brushing Ukyo's hair. "They're my closest female friends in Nyucheizu. We swore an oath to protect one another when we were young."
"Why the special name then?" Ukyo asked as she luxuriated in the silky smoothness of her hair.
"The oath was a special one." Shampoo replied as she headed back over to the bed. "I can't say much more than that; even as my Airens, you aren't close enough to the tribe to divulge secret oaths to. I do miss them though..."
"Even though they tried to claim me as theirs as well?" Ranma raised an eyebrow at her.
Shampoo smirked slightly. "Indeed."
"…" Ukyo's eyebrow twitched slightly. Great, one Amazon at her throat had been bad enough, but now some tween Amazons wanted in on her Ran-chan. More to the point, ones that she didn't have an understanding with, to boot.
"With the Joketsuzoku, it is first come, first served when it comes to men who has defeated members of our tribe in combat." the Amazon Champion shrugged. "I bestowed the Kiss of Marriage on Ranma first, so they have to bow to my claim out of respect and tradition, unless I offer to make them sister-wives."
"Would they even go for that?" Ukyo asked curiously.
"Likely they would. Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung outwardly portray themselves to the villagers as only liking women, but they like men just as much." Shampoo replied. "That was more to dissuade people like Mousse from going after them than anything else, and I am their first love."
"I thought Mousse was a one-of-a-kind guy in the Joketsuzoku." Ranma said with a disturbed look on her face at the possibility of multiple Mousse-like people in the same village.
"Brr." Shampoo shuddered at the thought of multiple Mousses. "He is. There are some males which are similar to him, but he is the exemplar of his negative character traits in the entire village. Some are like him, but not anything close to as bad."
The three continued talking for a while, but then it was decided that they should go to bed, which was the part that worried Ranma the most in this situation, because she was going to be sandwiched between them on the bed.
"There, that's not so bad, is it?" Ukyo said as she hugged Ranma from the front, while Shampoo mirrored her from the back. All three girls, well Ukyo and Ranma more than Shampoo, were flushed red at this positioning, but none of them could argue that it wasn't nice.
"Y-Yeah...this is...kinda nice." Ranma agreed, uncharacteristically meek.
"It's nice, to feel your warmth like this, Airen." Shampoo muttered as she hugged her from behind. Ranma gulped as Shampoo's not-inconsiderable bust squished onto her back.
Ukyo pulled the covers up and settled down to sleep. "Just rest, relax and let your tension, go Ran-chan. You'll need all the rest you can get for tomorrow. You're gonna win, I know that."
"Too true. No fat panda is going to stop our Ranma." Shampoo added, sleepiness entering her voice and a bit of her old pidgin coming back.
Between the warmth of her fiancées and her own mental exhaustion, it did not take long for Ranma to fall asleep, cute snores coming from her. In short order, both Ukyo and Shampoo followed suit. All three were unaware when Cologne came in, snapped a picture of the girls with a camera and left, mentally cackling to herself.
The Next Day
Tendo Dojo
Saotome Genma stood in the Tendo Dojo, adjusting his belt every now and again nervously. It was almost the appointed time for the duel, and Ranma still hadn't arrived, which was somewhat concerning.
Off to the side stood his old friend Sōun, who would once more be acting as the referee in this match. Sitting off to his rear and to the side were his daughters. Kasumi was looking much as she always did, while Nabiki was as scheming and canny as ever. Akane was in high dungeon as well, scowling like a storm in a teapot at nothing. Probably at the prospect of seeing her rivals flaunt their relationship with Ranma in front of her.
'I must be victorious today! I must!' the pudgy man thought with a frown. 'It's for The Boy's own good!'
He had devised a cunning strategy in order to defeat his son, one that The Boy wouldn't see coming. All Genma needed was for Ranma to drop his guard once, and he'd be able to pull off a win.
As the older Saotome adjusted his glasses for the umpteenth time, the familiar sound of feet landing on grass reached his sharp ears and he straightened imperceptibly. Seconds later, his son, flanked by those two girls and the old onibaba perched on his shoulder like a parrot, strode into the dojo.
"You're almost late, Boy." Genma barked authoritatively.
"Keep yer gi on, Pop." Ranma replied with his usual insolence and rolled eyes. "I'm here now, ain't I?"
Inside, Genma frowned. He'd very specifically been pranking Ranma for the past two weeks in order to raise his tension and make him twitchier than a cat in a house full of rocking chairs, which had been succeeding when last he'd seen the boy before the old hag had interrupted him and knocked him out.
Now though, Ranma was as fresh as a daisy, and seemed completely relaxed. Had Cologne pulled some sort of trick from her bag of 4000 years of Joketsuzoku tricks? Had she used Xi Fa Xiang Gao to modify his memories? Had she used an incense of some kind to forcibly relax him? Genma didn't know, but regardless of how, it did mean that one advantage of his was gone.
Once Cologne jumped off of him, and Shampoo and Ukyo had given him a pair of good luck hugs (much to Akane's fury), Ranma took his place opposite of Genma and awaited Sōun's words.
"Ahem. This is a match to determine whether Saotome Ranma is worthy of attaining the title of 'Master' in the Saotome-style of Anything Goes Martial Arts!" the moustached man announced formally. "There shall be one round only, and the winner is determined by knock-out or surrender on the part of one of the participants. There are no restrictions on techniques and styles, other than the stipulation that lethal blows and techniques are forbidden. Should either party use such things, I shall intervene and stop them, and the one who attempted to do so shall be formally disqualified. Do both of you understand?"
Both Saotome men nodded once firmly.
"Very well. Take your stances." Sōun said with a nod.
With well-practised ease, Genma and Ranma fell into the same ready stance, the basic stance of Saotome-style Anything Goes.
'Hm. The old man ain't too shabby.' Ranma thought as he analysed his father. 'He's tightened up his defence since I last sparred with him.'
'His guard is almost perfect; there isn't a single opening to be found!' Genma thought in disbelief. 'As always, his capability for self-improvement is astonishing. Ranma...you truly are amazing. But you are still naïve! The phrase 'youth and exuberance cannot defeat age and treachery' isn't an empty one. I will show you the truth of this, here and now!'
"Ready..." Sōun raised one arm before bringing it down in a chop. "...begin!"
A pair of blurs met in the middle of the dojo as Ranma and Genma collided, father and son already exchanging blows at a furious rate. Punch, block, kick, redirect and more were exchanged in the first few seconds, so fast that only Cologne was able to track all of them with perfect acuity.
'Unexpected...Genma is giving as good as he's getting.' Cologne thought with narrowed eyes. 'Given his lazy nature, I would have imagined him not getting back to full fighting fitness for a great deal longer than a fortnight. I underestimated him...'
Disengaging and leaping back at the exact same moment, the father and son duo charged in at one another again. Kicks, punches, throws, attempted pins...all of these were unleashed over the next few minutes as the two men struggled to overcome one another.
"Ehhh, Genma's not doing too badly." Nabiki said blandly. She didn't care either way who won. If Ranma lost, it would make good information to sell to idiots like Kuno, but otherwise, she had no stake in this mess of a fight.
Akane was torn between glaring jealously at Shampoo and Ukyo for being so close to Ranma, and glaring sullenly at the blurred and fast moving figure of Ranma for having become so much stronger than her!
Yes, a part of her remembered that she'd been weaker than Ranma from the get-go, but the majority of her didn't really care about little things like 'reality' and 'the truth' due to her jealousy and feelings on inadequacy.
Meanwhile, Genma and Ranma separated after yet another clash that had resulted in a draw.
'We're evenly matched in the basic Anything Goes arts.' Genma concluded. 'That means...'
'...the warm-up's over.' Ranma finished in his mind. 'Time to kick things into high gear.'
"Kachū Tenshin Amaguriken!" Ranma roared, his arms blurring into the familiar technique of the Imperial Chestnut Fist as he flew towards his father.
"Naïve! You are still naïve, Ranma!" Genma shouted. "Kakei!"
Amazingly, each and every blow from Ranma's attack was redirected away from Genma by his arms spinning in vertical circles in front of him. No matter how Ranma tried, not a single punch broke through Genma's defence.
"Oh my. What's that Mr Saotome's using?" Kasumi asked.
"That's Kakei, a technique taken from the combat martial art version of Tai Chi." Sōun answered. "It uses the rotation of the arms combined with manipulating the latent chi in the world around you to protect the arms, and softly redirect blows away from the user. A tricky technique to use, to be sure."
'Tch. Figures the old man would use such a lazy technique.' Ranma thought. 'But that was only a quarter of my speed. Let's see how you like three-quarters speed!'
Abruptly, each of the Saotome Heir's blows become much faster, with Genma having to try much harder to maintain his technique. Then, a single punch blew through the older Saotome's defences and socked him in the side of the face, sending him stumbling back.
"If that's all ya got Pop, then ya might as well use the Crouch of the Fierce Tiger and give up." Ranma grinned as he returned to a guard posture.
"One blow, as well as that one was landed, does not win a match, Boy." Genma growled as he cricked his neck slightly, before sliding into a slightly modified stance. "Now, allow me to show you my new technique...one that will show you hell..."
"Melodramatic, much?" his son snarked, but readied himself nonetheless. His old man may be a ham, but he usually did have a reason for saying hammy things.
In a flurry of movement, Genma leapt at Ranma, arms blurring. "Jigoku no Yurikago! (Cradle of Hell!)"
Ranma immediately dodged it and roundhouse kicked his father across the face, a look of disturbed fear on his face.
"Ran-chan's actually afraid!" Ukyo whispered in shock, Shampoo nodding numbly in agreement.
"Just what is this 'Cradle from Hell' technique that has my Son-in-Law so fearful?" Cologne wondered through narrowed eyes.
'I dunno what the heck his technique is, but every instinct I have is telling me to not get hit by it!' Ranma thought with wide eyes. 'What the heck kinda technique did you cobble together, Pop?!'
Sōun was also puzzled by this suddenly intimidated Ranma. The only 'training' that he'd seen his old friend do which was out of the ordinary was him hugging a large car tire for hours at a time, and even he couldn't see how that could make a martial arts technique, let alone one strong enough to spook Ranma in such a manner.
Face locked in an unusually serious expression, Genma launched more Jigoku no Yurikago attacks, one after another, with Ranma retreating from each of them, an unnerved expression on his face.
'This is so darn ridiculous! What the heck is this technique?!' the pigtailed martial artist thought as he dodged another Jigoku no Yurikago. 'Not even the Shin Shishi Hōkōdan gave me the same bad feeling as this thing!'
That actually made him put the breaks on, mentally speaking. 'Hang on...if Ryōga's massive pillar of chi couldn't make me run like this, then it can't be fear that's making me retreat! It's somethin' else...what though...?'
"Ah, so he has stopped merely reacting and started thinking." Cologne smirked.
"What do you mean, Grandmother?" Shampoo asked.
"Saotome Genma trained Ranma to listen to, trust and automatically respond to his instincts as a matter of course." the old Amazon replied. "That is a major strength for Ranma, as his instincts are razor sharp and his body automatically moves before his mind has time to consider the threat. That being said, it is also a weakness that those aware of it can take advantage of. I have been encouraging Son-in-Law to think about the sort of threat he faces every time his instinct warn him to move. It seems that my advice is bearing fruit now."
'What I'm feeling isn't fear, not like I'm dodging a powerful attack.' Ranma continued to think as he dodged the incessant attacks of his father. 'It's more like...revulsion? Like I'm dodging something way creepy, like c-cats. Is that it? Is this 'Cradle of Hell' just a creepy attack of some kind, not a powerful one?'
"Jigoku no Yurikago!" Genma roared and leapt at Ranma once more...who didn't dodge!
Once the attack was complete, Ranma found himself trapped in Genma's arms and legs, like a giant...hug...
"Oh, ya gotta be kiddin' me!" he roared, throwing his father off of him. "A freakin' HUG ATTACK?! No wonder I was wiggin' out! Nothin' more embarrassing than being hugged by your father in public! Talk about a lame attack..."
"...Shampoo, did Genma really just use a hug attack on Ran-chan?" Ukyo asked flatly after a moment.
"I want to say 'no', but he did." her fiancée replied equally flatly.
"Saotome-kun..." Sōun shook his head in disbelief.
'I...I can't believe he overcame the psychological effect of the Jigoku no Yurikago!' Genma thought in shock. 'Ranma is so unused to physical affection that even being hugged by me should have made him freak out to the point of giving up! It must be those darned girls! They've removed that weakness in him! Grrr...!'
Things were not looking good for the Master of the Saotome School. As he dodged, blocked and tried to counterattack his son's renewed assault, his mind recalled a special set of techniques he had once created...
'NO! I swore to never unseal them, especially not after what happened to the Kūmon Dojo!' he tried to dismiss the idea of using THOSE techniques, but images of what might happen to him at the hands of The Master if he lost to his son kept dancing through his mind. What little honour Genma had clashed with his desire to not be punished and, surprisingly, honour prevailed for the most part.
'It...it should be fine if I only use two techniques, one from each style.' he relented slightly. 'Only two and only for this match. That is the most I will use!'
Retreating slightly, Genma concentrated and, with a mental effort, slightly cracked open two sets of techniques that he had not used in a long, long time.
"Ranma, all martial artists have techniques they would prefer not to use, even if they are not lethal, or deadly to the user." he said with a scowl at his son. "Unlike the Jigoku no Yurikago, these techniques are a part of a serious fighting style that I once created, and swore to never use again. Consider it an honour to be considered enough of a threat that I must unseal them even slightly."
"Eeeeh? Izzat so?" Ranma drawled. "Bring it, old man!"
"As you sought, so shall you receive, Boy." Genma growled before bellowing, "FREEZE!"
Not having expected that, Ranma actually froze for an instant, but it was more than enough to allow Genma to charge in close to him and unleash a powerful attack.
"Yama-Sen Ken: Mōko Kaimon Ha! (1000 Mountains: Fierce Tiger Gate of Opening Blast!)" the Master of the Saotome School shouted, spreading his arms with almost blurring speed and kicking out at the same time, taking Ranma off-guard.
"Hm?!" Cologne regarded this new technique with interest. She could see that his words regarding it were not false; this was a powerful technique from a powerful style. Yet he preferred not to use it. It made her wonder why that was the case.
Ranma flipped in the air and landed on his feet.
"Not bad, old man." he said with a smirk. "But one attack ain't gonna win this for ya! Now that I know how your attack goes, I'll be able to stop it!"
"Indeed?" Genma smirked at his son before assuming a loose stance with his arms held up, with the hands loose in front of him. "But how can you defend...against what you cannot see?"
All the (powerful) martial artists in the room stiffened slightly as they felt Saotome Genma's 'presence' vanish. Even although they could see him right in front of them, their senses couldn't feel him.
Then he vanished, and Ranma was rocked by rapid-fire blows from behind.
"Umi-Sen Ken: Haku Dato Shin Shō! (1000 Seas: Strike of the Spitting White Snake!)" Genma roared as his final pair of blows sent Ranma flying, his shirt ripped off of his body and torn to shreds by his father's attacks.
"Ran-chan!" Ukyo exclaimed in worry.
Fortunately, Ranma flipped in mid-air and landed just as before, rolling his shoulders one after the other and wincing. "OK, I have ta give ya this much; that one stung." he said.
"Humph. Bravado can only take you so far, Boy." Genma snorted as he assume his stance once again. "Strike down my Haku Dato Shin Shō if you are able to, but do not boast before you accomplish that much!"
"That's the plan, Pop. Time ta show you one of my new best moves!" Ranma smirked before holding his hands out. "Sō Mōko Takabisha! (Double Pride of the Fierce Tiger!)"
A pair of yellow chi blasts erupted from his hands, leaping across the distance between him and his father, even as he tried to hide in the Dorobō no Gaitō (Mantle of the Thief). The man was blasted off of his feet and slammed into the solid wooden wall of the dojo, held there for a moment before Ranma cut his attack off.
"...Saotome-kun?" Sōun called, but it was obvious that Genma was in no fit state to answer. His eyes had rolled back and he was slumped against the wall bonelessly.
"Ahem...this match is over." the Tendo Patriarch declared and pointed at Ranma. "The winner is Saotome Ranma, the newest Master of the Anything Goes School!"
There was a pause before Ranma was almost bowled over by a pair of happy, excited girls performing flying glomps. Luckily for Ranma, he managed to quickly wrap an arm around each of them and steady himself as Ukyo and Shampoo hugged him for all they were worth.
'That was a well fought match.' Cologne thought approvingly as her son-in-law managed to persuade his fiancées to let him go. She turned to regard the unconscious form of Saotome Genma with a frown, however. 'Those two techniques that he used were very different from his usual Anything Goes Style, far more powerful and complex, not to mention potentially deadly. The reluctance evident in how he used them tells me he was telling the truth about how he would have preferred to not use them. This warrants investigating, because I know Ranma; he'll have at least guessed the basics of how to use both of those techniques already. If there's a negative consequence to using them, then I need to find out.'
Later
Saotome Genma's Room, Tendo Home
Grumbling and grousing in irritation, the Master of the Saotome Schoolsat next to the window and stared unseeing out of the window.
It was over. He could no longer order Ranma to submit to him as a master to a student and be able to have some sort of moral ground, as Ranma was now the Master of his own, separate school of Anything Goes.
The precise name of Ranma's new and divergent branch of martial arts was up in the air, but for the moment, it was being called the New Saotome Style, while Genma's school was being called the Orthodox Saotome Style.
'Orthodox...pah. I have never been anything approaching orthodox in my entire life!' the pudgy man scowled.
"Still grumbling like a child, Saotome Genma?" Cologne asked as she appeared on the windowsill, startling the man.
"And what do you want?" he growled.
"You are well aware than Ranma has quite the skill in learning techniques from a single glance." the Matriarch stated bluntly. "He has, in all likelihood, already broken down the basic theories and principles behind the two unusual techniques you used against him today. I wish to know if they possess any negative side effects, given how reluctant you were to use them."
"Yama-Sen Ken and Umi-Sen Ken do not have any negative effects on the user." Genma denied. "They are merely too powerful to use in regular situations."
"Explain." the single word spoken was no less than an order.
"Both styles, when you look at them on the surface, compare the human body to a house; undermining the foundations, breaking through doors and the like." Genma explained after a moment. "The truth of the styles is that both are based on criminal activity. Yama-Sen Ken is based on a robber, breaking through the front door and looting a house, whereas Umi-Sen Ken is based on a burglar, breaking into a house and looting the place via stealth. When I created Yama-Sen Ken, shortly before Ranma's birth, I could tell that a Master of it would be too powerful, so I created the Umi-Sen Ken in order to perfectly counter it. I then sealed my own usage of both styles, and gave the Yama-Sen Ken scroll to the Master of the failing Kūmon Dojo, in hopes he could revive it."
"I take it that didn't happen?" Cologne asked after a moment of silence.
"No. When I said that the Kūmon Dojo was failing, that referred to the state of the dojo itself as well as the fact it had no students." the pudgy man said with a tired sigh. "Kūmon Ryūya was a competent martial artist, but he lacked any greater insight into techniques he did not create himself. He saw that Yama-Sen Ken compared the human body to a house and practised the techniques. He used and mastered three to my knowledge; the Mōko Kaimon Ha, the Dokuja Tanketsu Shō (Poisonous Serpent Searching Hole Palm), and the move which killed him, the Kaichū Hōju Satsu (Jewel Held in One's Own Pocket Kill). He used it on the only thing keeping his dojo standing, the central pillar, which made the dojo collapse atop of him, mortally wounding him."
"You were not there?" Cologne asked.
"I heard the tale from a few of my fellow wandering martial artists early on in Ranma's training trip. For your information, I spoke to the man for maybe ten minutes, and left before he started practising. How was I supposed to know the man was daft enough to practice techniques like that on his own dojo, knowing it was practically falling down around his ears?" Genma answered crossly.
The old matriarch had to admit there was truth to the fat man's words. Kūmon Ryūya sounded very much a daft idiot to have done that.
"I swore to never use either style again, and kept my word for over a decade and a half." Genma finished his tale. "and against my own son, no less."
"You say that Umi-Sen Ken is a style specifically designed to counter Yama-Sen Ken. What would happen if two equally skilled Masters of the styles clashed?" Cologne asked.
"Barring outside interference, the Yama-Sen Ken Master would be defeated." Genma stated. "All of the ultimate techniques of Umi-Sen Ken are specifically designed to counter and negate the ultimate techniques of Yama-Sen Ken. Because of that overly-specialised nature, however, Umi-Sen Ken lacks versatility and power. In Ranma's hands, I don't doubt he can make up for that somehow."
"Indeed." Cologne doubted that Ranma would want to use either style once he knew of their origins, but he didn't need to know about them until he'd practised them until full Mastery, now did he?
"The Master has something planned for The Boy." the fat man said gruffly. "I don't know what, but as it is The Master, it cannot be anything good."
"That doesn't need to be said, Saotome Genma." the old Amazon snorted. "Happi may be troublesome, but I have just about had it with him. If he crosses me again, he will have a short, sharp shock before waking up in a retirement home."
With that, the old woman hopped away into the night.
"And don't you think The Master is aware of that?" Genma mused as he closed the window and started to get ready for a nice hot bath.
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Next Chapter: Mousse Returns: A Circus of a Problem!
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