Chapter 39 – When Darkness Shines the Brightest
A/N: Song (Can I Exist – Missio) Sorry for the shorter chapter! As always, please review.
A high, keening noise filled his ears. So intense that he thought his eardrums might explode from the pressure of the sound. Then deafening silence. The excruciating pain he had endured melted away. The burning subsided as cool air washed over his shivering skin. Cracking his eyes open, Draco recoiled at the two blurry figures towering above him. One of the figures merely sighed while the other deftly lifted him to his feet, a gentle touch settled against Draco's cheek. He nearly sobbed at the affectionate gesture after enduring so much agony and hatred. The contact remained until Draco's vision recovered. He was surprised to find Tegid Foel's silken muzzle pressed against him, their eyes closed peacefully. Draco's focus shifted to the figure behind Tegid Foel and he flinched seeing Cerridwen's dark personage. However, this time she looked different. Less terrifying and harpy-like. He was entranced, as if pulled in by a Veela. But even a Veela's beauty would seem vulgar compared to what stood before him. Tegid Foel, sensing Draco's attention, pulled back and turned his magnificent head towards the goddess.
"Yes, now she shows you her true form." Tegid spoke sagely, "The true goddess of duality. Unless found worthy, none ever witness the inner beauty I have pledged myself to for all eternity."
Draco, despite his exhaustion and lingering pain, remembered his well-mannered upbringing and gave Cerridwen a deep bow of respect.
"My goddess." He whispered.
She merely arched an eyebrow in acknowledgement and beckoned him forward. Gone were the sharp features, yet she retained her regal and ancient expression. It was as if she was split down the middle, divided in color. One side clothed in a purplish midnight blue while the other side was a brilliant silvery white. Gold and silver bands wrapped delicately across every inch of visible skin. Skin that no longer looked as if she were a glowing underwater corpse. Her wild mane of hair, so reminiscent of Hermione's equally riotous curls, reached down the back of her calves and swirled with some unseen breeze. A large cloak draped across her shoulder constructed in a manner Draco had never seen. The dark side was a thick and heavy sleeve, completely opaque with dots of light twinkling along the edges. The light side was a shimmering, diaphanous material where flashes of white fire flickered at the hems. Even her eyes held a dual set of colors, but not as stark as her clothing and hair. One eye was a deep violet with a brilliant shade of golden amber surrounding the pupil, whereas the other was so devoid of color it appeared almost white but for a slight ice blue glaze ringed in a smoky gray. Draco confessed that he felt as if two distinctive eyes followed him rather than a pair. Like each eye was seeing some different part of the world, completely separate from the other. She smirked, likely catching onto his train of thought.
"Yes, each eye sees differently. One of life and the other of decay. You cannot have one without the other." She offered, her smirk dropped as Draco came to stand before her, "Vessel of My Beloved, you have proven worthy of the knowledge of my being and of all that it entails. Once I have granted this wisdom, you cannot turn back. If you do, you will both die and be parted for all eternity. Never to meet again til the end of time. This is a gift not easily shared and so few manage such a precious burden. Are you willing once again, willingly and wholeheartedly, free from any doubt or reservation to pay the price for what you cherish most?"
Draco stared hard at the face of Cerridwen, searching deep within those otherworldly orbs for any trick or clue. They flashed momentarily, but Draco could find nothing that indicated ulterior motive. He was, after all, a Slytherin. Taking a deep breath, he gave another bow before straightening up once again.
"I am willing." He answered.
"So be it." She replied softly.
Bending slightly, she dipped her hand into the vast cauldron below her and stood, holding out the iridescent fluid in her palm before Draco.
"Three drops given willingly." She ordered, "Once you are bound in both blood and magic, the knowledge I give you today shall be shared. For neither of you can carry this burden alone. Remember my warning. Now kneel."
"How will we know if we have bonded properly?" Draco asked as he kneeled before her.
Cerridwen looked slightly irritated at the line of questioning.
"Did I not just say these drops would give you knowledge of all my being?" she countered coolly, "Now cease your questions or I shall rescind my offer."
Draco nodded mutely, properly chastised. She gave him an expectant look as she dropped her palm before his mouth, obviously expecting him to drink from it. He gave Tegid Foel one final glance, who bowed their antlers imperiously, before Draco's returned to the gleaming universe held neatly in Cerridwen's hand. Lifting his own hands, he slipped them under Cerridwen's and tilted the liquid onto his waiting tongue.
Hermione stood terrified, watching as the sky began to lighten while the thick column of blood red smoke continued to surround Draco's form. The moment she had felt him go under or into wherever he was meant to go, she had returned. For a brief flash, she had come face to face with Cerridwen, whose vast black eyes had penetrated Hermione's soul. She had barely begun to form a singular thought before she was roughly knocked back into the present, standing before the cauldron while disembodied echoes floated from within the cloud. She refused to move, knowing the slightest movement might destroy the entire ritual. So she stood and she waited, sweat running down her back and the heavy crystal cutting into her neck. Exhaustion creeped throughout her muscles, but terror, along with a heavy dose of concern, kept her alert and on edge. Samhain was almost over, the inky sky losing its battle to the rising sun. A mist surrounded the ritual circle but never broke the barrier. She took a small degree of satisfaction in knowing that their ritual line was impenetrable. It meant at least one thing had gone right. The cut in her hand burned but she did not dare clean it or heal it, intent on changing nothing til he came back to her.
She bit down on her lip nervously, concerns flowing through her mind. What if Draco couldn't handle what he saw? What if Cerridwen's demands were too great? What if, what if, what if? Hermione thought she might scream from all the what ifs in her life. For once, she wanted surety. Surety they'd survive this night. A guarantee they'd make it out of this place. Any assurance they'd win this war. Confidence that maybe, just maybe, there was a life worth living after this. She sighed heavily, tendrils of a headache wrapping around her temple. She needed him to come back soon. She couldn't do this without him. He was giving so much and she was tired of all the people she cared about giving such great sacrifices.
Soon, the sun peeked through the trees and began burning off the morning mist. Her eyes darted around rapidly, watching as the beams began to creep towards them. Once those beams hit the circle, it would be broken and the ritual ended – whether Draco had completed his task or not. She began tapping her thigh nervously, her magic crackling with unease. The sunlight was only inches away. He needed to come back now! She wasn't sure what would happen if the circle broke while he was still engulfed in that mist. She didn't know if it would irrevocably hurt him as one did if splinched. Or would he simply fade away as Sirius had done in the Department of Mysteries?
She felt herself start, her foot shifting ever so slightly, as a single dusty stream slanted closer and closer. Only a minute or two more and it would be over. A cry of despair escaped her lips as a tear slid down her cheek. The scarlet smoke hadn't thinned out, its billowing form as impenetrable as ever.
"Please Draco." she whimpered, gripping the crystal so hard that it reopened the wound on her hand, "Don't go!"
Another tear slipped from her eye as she released a wail of anguish when a finger of daylight finally pressed against the ritual line. With a hiss, the line flared brighter than the sun – forcing Hermione to shield her eyes as Draco's name slipped from her lips in a final desperate cry. As the light died down, she fell to her knees as tears streaked down and splashed on the ground below. Resting her forehead on the cauldron, cool now that the fire had long since died. The circle was broken, it didn't matter what she did now. Yanking off the dark crystal, the delicate chain leaving a small cut around her neck as it snapped. She didn't care. It was over. He hadn't made it back in time. She refused to lift her head, not wanting to acknowledge that the red column of smoke that had held him was gone, taking him with it.
He was gone. Of course, she thought bitterly. The moment she found happiness, it was always snatched from her. As she looked back on the short life she had lived so far, she realized that every part of her was compromised of stolen moments. Brief glimpses of joy and delight, brutally interrupted by some force beyond her control. From the piercing loss of her parents to the fresh wound of her magical soulmate stolen into the ether. She sobbed harder as more losses and death piled themselves on her trembling shoulders. Oh how she wished she could join them. She was so tired of carrying this. She could have done with him standing steadfast by her side, but now he was gone. Lifting a shivering hand, she gripped at her chest. The breaking pain was too great. The sun was too bright. Anger flared through her.
How dare the day shine when she was at her darkest?!
Summoning all the fury she could manage while forcing the surroundings elementals to bend to her will, she slashed at the sunlight screaming with all the wrath she could muster. Dark, thunderous clouds appeared overhead as the wind began to howl and whistle. Such was her madness, that small trees began to uproot and tumble around while birds shrieked in protest at the unnatural winds. Fat, cold droplets of rain begin to pelt the earth – soaking, flooding, and swelling nearby streams. Hermione let the skies cry for her. She let the wind scream the words she couldn't speak. Roots broke through the earth and slithered, sweeping the ritual tools away, ignoring the cauldron that Hermione was slumped against. Pushing off its iron belly, she let out a mighty shout as crack of thunder shook the world around her. With a pathetic hiccup and a limp flick of her wrist, the roots launched the cauldron away to be lost to the bowels of the woods. She wretched the thick hood of the ritual cloak off as bolt of lightning streaked across the sky. Finally, Hermione settled her eyes in the direction where Draco had been. The wind died. The rain dried up. The roots froze in place. The entirety of nature went still.
Lying crumpled on the ground, half hidden under the sprawling cloak, was a mess of platinum blonde hair with face peaceful and eyes closed. Hermione felt the air leave her lungs. She didn't dare say his name for fear it might cause him, this hallucination of her grief, to disappear. She sat still as a stone, watching, waiting, taking in what she assumed would be her last glimpse of him.
"I love you." She sighed and dropped her head into her hands, the painful goodbye laced in those few words.
She let out a weak sob as her hands fell away. Sniffling, she looked at his beautiful face one last time. Her breath seized. Silver blue eye were watching her cautiously, roving up and down her body, meticulously taking her in.
It couldn't be…
Deliberately, those penetrating eyes blinked and fixed themselves upon her again. Hands slid out from under the cloak, brushing against the debris of Hermione's sorrow, and pressed upwards against the broken earth into a kneeling position. With a muted grunt, deft fingers reached up and heaved the quartz from around their neck just as Hermione had done. She watched like a hawk as a small bead of blood trailed down the exposed skin. She forced her eyes upwards.
"Dra…" she began, unable to force the name upon her lips, knowing she wouldn't be able to continue should they turn false.
"Miss me Granger?"