Castiel waited until Dean was asleep before quietly slipping his arms from the hunter, allowing him to stand up and head for the door. He gave one last look to be sure Dean was still unconscious before he left. Cas walked towards the shuffling he heard from the library, knowing Sam was still up.

The younger hunter was pulling various books from the shelves. Cas looked over the collection he had amassed and surmised he was gathering every single book the Men of Letters had on demons.

Sam didn't look up, but he spoke anyway. "Hey."

Cas stepped in. "Hello Sam." He debated with himself for a moment before he decided to take a seat at the table beside the mountain of texts.

Sam grabbed one last volume before he headed back and took the seat opposite Cas. "Dean?"

"Asleep." Cas assured him.

"Like actually asleep?" Sam asked.

Cas nodded. "He'll have a few hours until his dreams return."

Sam winced. "He's been-?"

"Since we cured him, even angelic assistance cannot keep his nightmares away all night."

Sam swallowed, feeling his chest tighten. He forced himself to push it aside.

"Kevin?"

Sam cleared his throat. "Uh, he is going to stay at the hotel at nights. I don't think he's ready to trust sleeping here…"

"While Dean is here." Cas finished.

"Yeah. Honestly I'm impressed he is okay enough to spend the day here."

The angel nodded, feeling a flash of residual horror at watching Dean plunge that blade through Kevin's throat.

Sam took a deep breath, trying to steer the conversation away from those memories. "Where did you guys go?"

"Ohio, Georgia, Arizona." Cas recalled. "We just drove for a while. Stopped at a couple motels."

"He get any rest at all during that?"

"He did." The angel shifted slightly. "Dean found a case and we worked it."

"Where?"

"Tonto National Forest. A couple groups had gone missing. And a kid, Liam. We got the kid out, but everyone else was dead."

Sam flinched, glad the kid made it, but sorry to hear of the rest. "What was it?"

"Wendigo."

"What?" The young hunter's eyes snapped up to Cas. "Everything. Now." He demanded, needing the whole story.

His face was set in a constant expression between concern and disbelief through the entire summary of the case. "And how was he?"

"Calm." Cas admitted. "Like he was himself again. In control."

Sam nodded, wondering if that was a good sign or not. "He seems to be doing… okay."

"Mmh." the angel sighed. "I can't tell if he is pushing through it alright or if it just hasn't caught up to him yet."

"You mean he could still be in shock."

Cas bowed his head slightly in agreement. "He feels things very deeply. If it hasn't sunk in yet…"

"Then he's screwed." Sam breathed. He looked over Cas carefully. "Do you think he can come out of this?"

There was a lengthy pause before Cas' posture deflated slightly. "I don't know." He admitted, feeling a slight twinge of relief at having someone to share some of this burden. "I'd like to think so but…"

"With everything."

"I think as the mark corrupts him again, he'll-"

"Yeah." Sam cut him off. "I know." He distractedly tapped his fingers on a book, pointedly trying not to think about the ways the mark corrupted him the first time.

"Did you have any luck finding something that would take it off?"

"No. I've been looking for a way to slow it down. At least buy us more time before he gets worse again."

Cas took a deep breath. "You know with the scale of the things he did as a demon, I don't know if he'll be able to resist as long as he did."

"Yeah. I thought about that. It just makes it more important." Sam admitted.

Cas looked over the stack of books, nodding and hoping one of them had the answer.

Sam watched him for a few minutes, choosing what he wanted to say. "Thank you." He said quietly, getting Cas' attention. "I don't think he would have made it through the last couple days without you."

"Of course."

Sam gave a weak smile. "Honestly I sort of felt relieved when you guys didn't return that first night." He felt a pang of guilt for the feeling.

"It's understandable."

"Cas, what happened in the hotel before I got there?" Sam asked, needing the full story.

"He killed Hannah first, and used her grace on me." He paused trying to figure out how he wanted to tell the things that happened after. How the tension between them was likely what snapped the final thread Dean had. "He was frustrated with me and he left. He came back, soaked in blood a few hours later. That must've been when he hit the Cape."

"Yeah."

"He left right after and started to hunt down the angels Metatron had kept in his inner circle." Cas frowned. "He tortured seven angels before he got the location of my grace."

Sam followed. "And he went and found it."

"He almost didn't give it to me. He said he was worried it'd kill me."

The hunter frowned, absorbing the information. Dean had gone through all of that for Cas. To save Cas. Even with what he was, and the methods he employed, there was still some mission to save someone he loved. He had to hope that maybe that spark could be a good sign. He shook himself from his thoughts to listen to the angel as he continued.

"I healed from it for a while." He paused for a moment, making up his mind on what to skip. "I found an opportunity and I knocked him out. I painted the devil's trap and managed to crack the wall to split the warding and call you."

Sam nodded, feeling like it wasn't quite as easy as Cas had made it sound, but not sure he was ready to hear the details of whatever fight he imagined that took. "He was with Crowley the whole time before that. Crowley called as soon as he bailed. Said he was a powder keg and I needed to find him. He saw it coming." He had been surprised when Crowley had reached out. "I think even he was scared."

Cas bowed his head, focusing his gaze on one of the books on the table. "Dean was… It was hard to see him like that." He sighed. "I've been trying to keep him away from the news channels. I was glad didn't search for it on his own."

"Good. Yeah, it's not...that wouldn't be good."

"No. I wouldn't imagine it would be." The news was still running coverage of the massacre almost 24/7. They had still only just begun identifying the dead. Cas straightened up, needing to change the subject. "Would you like help looking through these books?"

"Sure." Sam accepted, sliding one across the table to Cas before opening another himself.

Cas settled in for a few hours researching with Sam, but he was sure to return to the hunter's bed before his nightmares had a chance to push through. He found Dean sleeping on his side, Paka having settled against him. He put him back into a deep sleep, and would be there when he woke.

.

Kevin brought breakfast with him when he arrived in the morning. Sam was surprised to find Dean actually pick at it, not expecting him to accept food at all. He chose to believe that was a good sign. Maybe Cas' quick escape with him had actually had a significant impact on him. He could hope.

Cas found himself following Dean to the garage where the hunter started to work on fixing the impala after the damage the wendigo did. He started buffing out around the scratches.

"Do you need new doors?" Cas asked, looking at the tears in the metal."

The hunter continued to work. "No, I can weld a patch into the holes. She'll be good as new."

Cas nodded, not sure what that entailed, but he was glad to hear it could be fixed.

"What's the plan?" Dean finally asked, needing to know.

Cas knew what he meant. "We're looking for a way to slow the mark's corruption." he replied.

"Okay, and when that doesn't work?"

"Dean-"

Dean kept his head down, eyes on his work. "I just gotta wonder when we should start focusing on figuring out a way to lock me down so I can't hurt anyone else."

"It won't come to that."

"Yeah, and we'd find a way to get this mark off before I was in danger of dying." Dean's voice a little harsher than he intended. He watched Cas flinch slightly, and he felt guilt for bringing that up.

"We'll try our best." Cas finally said.

Dean sighed, stopping his work for a second to look back at the angel. "Cas. I'm serious. You can't let me become that thing. I can't be a demon again."

"You won't have to."

"You have to promise me. Do whatever it takes to take me out before that happens."

Cas looked at him, pain in his eyes, but he nodded, unable to deny the hunter this request.

"Thank you."

.

It was early that evening when Sam came out to the garage, interrupting Dean's work. He was amused to see Dean in the welders mask with Cas just staring at the process as is. "Hey."

Dean put the torch down, removing the helmet to look at him. "What's up?"

"Rudy called, he's got a couple werewolves, and no one's nearby. Asked if I could back him up."

"Want Cas and I to suit up?"

"I've got this one." Sam said, trying not to sound too hasty to avoid a hunt with Dean so soon. "Besides, I've gotta fly there if I want to make good time. It's in Tonopah, Nevada."

Dean furrowed his brows. "Tonopah…" He muttered, trying to think of why that name sounded familiar.

"Yeah, something wrong?"

"No." He said, dismissing it with a shrug. "You call if something goes sideways, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll check in." Sam assured him. "Kevin went back to stay with his mom for a bit. Research there."

Dean nodded stiffly, knowing that Kevin just wasn't comfortable staying around the bunker with Sam gone, and he couldn't blame him. "Yeah, okay."

"You two going to be okay?"

"I'm not made of glass, Sam. We'll be fine."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Jerk."

"Bitch."

Sam headed back out of the garage, heading to pack up for the trip.

Dean stayed still for another minute before his face lit up. "Tonopah." He stood, remembering why it sounded familiar.

Cas tilted his head and furrowed his brow, trying to figure out why Dean seemed to have that same expression he had when he had gotten Cas that hat. That mischievous sort of happiness.

Dean however didn't elaborate, simply pulling his phone out of his pocket and heading off to make a phone call.

.

That night Dean ate takeout across from Cas when Sam called to say he had landed.

"I'm just about to go hunt down somewhere to sleep."

Dean spoke, his mouth still full of lo mein. "I got you a room at a motel."

Sam paused. "You what?"

"I got you a motel room." Dean repeated. "Figured you were getting in late, called ahead."

"You've never done that."

"Fine jeez. Try to do something nice for once."

Sam hesitated. "Where?"

"521 N Main St."

There was a pause as Sam tried to figure out if this was a trap of some sort. He finally relented with a sigh. "Alright. I'm grabbing a rental now. I'll call you in the morning, let you know where we're at with this."

"Alright. Watch your back."

Sam hung up the phone. Dean leaned back against the wall, swapping out open containers of chinese food and continuing to pick at it. Cas watched him make a genuine attempt to eat, and he was grateful at least for the effort. The silence continued for a few minutes.

Dean cleared his throat, speaking without directly looking at the angel. "With Abbadon for a while we capped her with a devil's trap and kept her head away from her body."

Cas scrunched his brow. "I would prefer not to talk about decapitating you."

"Sorry." Dean muttered, knowing it wasn't fair to Cas to keep bringing it up. But it was the only thing that kept looping back into his mind.

Castiel was silent for a moment, overcoming his own emotions to try to lend the hunter the assurance he needed at the moment. "I won't let you become a demon again." He repeated his earlier promise, trying to put a bit more conviction into it than before.

Dean looked up at the angel, it being the first time Cas had directly promised to take him off the board before it came to that. He saw the tension in his posture, watched the strain in his eyes, but he felt a small flash of relief at the words. He nodded his thanks, feeling a bit more at ease.

"But you have to promise me you'll keep fighting." Cas insisted, his eyes locking with Dean's. "You have to promise to give us as much time as we can to find a way to save you."

"I will."

"Promise me."

"Jeez, alright! I promise."

Cas held his gaze for another few seconds before he let it drop. He took a breath to calm himself and watched Dean roll his eyes before returning to his food.

Dean let the newly uncomfortable silence drag on for another few minutes before he just decided to push past it. "So, you ready to learn how to paint a car?"

Cas relaxed somewhat, grateful for the change in conversation. "Is that the next step?"

"Well, we have some sanding to do, but yeah. It's coming up pretty fast."

Cas listened to Dean describe everything left in finishing the repairs on the car, just relieved to hear the hunter talking so easily about something that wasn't life or death. He watched with curiosity as Dean's phone chimed a message alert.

Dean pulled it out, noting the simple "FUCK you." from Sam, and he chuckled, shoving it back in his pocket.

Cas tilted his head in question. "What?"

"Oh nothing." Dean said, a grin still plastered across his face. "I just sent Sam to a… you know what, nevermind." He stood up, closing containers to throw in the fridge. "Come on, let's get back to work."

Sometimes I look at this, and remember that when I started writing "Only Human" I was planning it to be a quick 3 chapter story.

Also. 521 N, Main St. Tonopah, Nevada. Address of one world famous clown motel.