I go out on a party, and look for a little fun.
But I find a darkened corner, 'cause I still miss someone.
Lux was packed tonight. The club had a well-deserved reputation as a den of iniquity, a safe haven for those who wanted to leave themselves behind for a evening. Desires explored, passions embraced, inhibitions forgotten. Nothing was off limits in LA's most exclusive venue. As night gave way to early morning, for some the party was only just beginning. Sin was in the air and nobody was immune.
Nobody except Chloe Decker it seemed. The detective sat in a secluded booth away from the crowd, observing the dance floor as she waited for her friends to return. Even on this, her bachelorette party, it turned out she had to be the sensible one, the responsible adult who knew better than to leave drinks unattended in a nightclub.
Still, she didn't mind too much. Revelry had never much suited her, and the last time she'd danced here... well, it wasn't exactly appropriate for her to be reliving that memory right now.
They weren't even supposed to be here. The plan for the evening had been kept secret from her of course, but she'd been clear about one thing. No Lux. Definitely no Lux. They'd started out with good intentions, beginning their celebrations on the opposite side of the city and partying their way from bar to bar.
But as the hour grew late the lure of VIP entry and free drinks proved too much. For temptation was the very currency Lux traded in and the tribe were helpless to resist. Good intentions had paved the road here, and now Chloe was stuck in her own personal hell.
It was Maze that had insisted they come. One last visit to the old hunting ground she'd said. They'd tried to correct her, pointing out that the saying was actually stomping ground, but Maze had just given them a predatory smile before replying that stomping was something she'd never done here.
Perhaps it was the return of the 'demon' bartender that had made the club feel so... different tonight. The atmosphere was charged, the dance floor a sea of twisting, writhing bodies that spilled out into every available space. Shadows normally kept at bay by warm fires and golden lights overhead had developed a life of their own, beckoning those willing into dark corners where dark deeds lay in store.
Still, at least he wasn't here. Chloe couldn't help but feel relieved and disappointed over that, all at the same time. She was surprised at his absence though. It was a Saturday night after all and the club owner should have been in the centre of the chaos, the focus point of a vortex filled with lust and wanting, moving easily through the crowds as he enticed them to let go, just this once, for what could it hurt?
She knew from experience that it could hurt quite a lot. It was possible that he had already headed upstairs with his chosen company for the evening, even if it was a little early for that. She tried to ignore the small pang of jealousy that ran through her at the thought. Too late for that now, for who he chose to spend his time with was none of her business, much like her pending union with Marcus was none of his.
Marcus. It was him who should be on her mind. Not her... whatever he was. Whatever he had been. Not her ex, not her lover, for one kiss did not a relationship make. She knew that. And if one thing was certain, Lucifer didn't do relationships. As shocked as she had been at one time over his sudden marriage, she was equally unshocked when it only lasted two weeks. She still couldn't quite wrap her head around that one, and of course he'd never explained.
She was doing it again. Thinking about the wrong man and messing with the ring on her finger for what felt like the hundredth time that evening. Stop it Decker! She pulled her hand away with a frustrated sigh and glared at it angrily. Seriously, she felt like she was going to have to sit on the damn thing if it didn't start behaving soon.
The ring was fine. More than fine. Yet she couldn't shake off the feeling that on her hand it felt wrong somehow. They'd already taken it to a jeweller be resized, Marcus being unwilling to return it to the original store for some unknown reason. Maybe it fell off the back of a truck. She smirked at the thought, her future husband being far too straight laced for anything of the sort. No, they simply hadn't been together long enough for him to know her ring size yet. Never mind the fact she suspected the purchase had been made in somewhat of a rush.
It all felt like too much of a rush sometimes. But she was happy, they were happy together, and that's all that mattered wasn't it? Sure, he had yet to develop any kind of real connection with her daughter, but she liked him well enough and the detective was convinced that he would completely win her over given time. Much like he had with her. Trixie was just in a difficult place at the moment, still dealing with what had happened between her and Maze, struggling with missing Lucifer. And if Chloe was honest with herself, she wasn't the only one.
She'd barely seen him since they announced the engagement. His reaction had been... concerning. She'd fully expected to see that wide, bright smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, a shining shield to hide his feelings on the matter as he congratulated her. What she hadn't anticipated was the small nod and resigned look on his face as he turned and walked away without a word. Almost like he already knew.
Perhaps it was her own fault. She'd asked him to back off, tired of his constant opinions on her love life. What she hadn't meant was for him to stop talking to her altogether. Perhaps they were one in the same to him now.
According to Dan he still came into the station, helping out on cases, assisting with interrogations, but never her cases, never when she was at her desk. The lieutenant spent more time out in the field with her than in his office these days, but no matter how much she appreciated his vast well of experience when it came to police work, it wasn't the same. She still felt the loss of her partner.
It seemed she wasn't the only one he was actively avoiding either, Ella sadly noting that he rarely came into the lab anymore. It had taken Charlotte to point out that perhaps her enthusiasm over the hottest new couple in the department had been rather thoughtless in front of her stepson, and now the lab tec was wracked with guilt over the hurt she'd caused her friend.
Closing her eyes, Chloe took a deep breath before making the decision to concentrate on what tonight was supposed to about, having fun. And that started with more booze. She picked up the glass in front of her, the pink umbrella reminding her of one of the first drinks she'd ever had here. 'He asked me to make you something you'd like. Did I get it wrong?' Annoyingly, she hadn't, despite her normal preference for whisky. A preference that had only grown stronger over the last couple of years, thanks to being introduced to top shelf bottles far beyond those her pay packet could reach.
Still, this night was about celebrating her last days as a single woman and Ella had insisted that meant girly drinks and pink umbrellas. And apparently, it also meant trying her best to lose her engagement ring. Chloe stared wide-eyed at the diamond encrusted band on the table in front of her, so caught up in her own thoughts that she couldn't even recall taking it off. She couldn't even fathom how Marcus would react if she lost it. Probably because you don't know him as well as you think you do.
Shaking that off, Chloe brought the ring closer, holding it up in front of her as it glittered in the strobing lights of the club.
If she was honest, it wasn't what she would have chosen. After receiving something very similar from Dan, she'd imagined that if she were to walk down the aisle again that the ring would have been a little bit more, well, her. Perhaps that was why it had never felt quite right on her finger, despite her previously having worn a band there for many years. It wasn't that she was fussy, far from it, it was just that she had hoped for something that reflected who she was as a person. Just like the ring on Lucifer's hand.
She was letting her mind run away with her again. For all her disappointment it was still a lovely ring. Perfect really. What most women would dream of. In fact that was true of their entire time together, a textbook courtship straight out of a romantic movie. Including the short run time.Flowers, chocolates, fancy dinners in expensive restaurants, he'd ticked all the boxes and she'd found herself swept up in it all. And yet she'd never quite been able shake the quiet voice in the back of her head, the one that said over and over... too perfect.
She was in love though. She was sure of it. How could she not be? And he loved her, he couldn't have made that clearer after he'd walked out on her that one time. She couldn't blame him for freaking out, even she still found herself panicking occasionally with how quickly everything had happened, never more so than after agreeing to marry him.
It had been the right decision though. The lieutenant was strong, secure, dependable. Always there for her. All the things she so badly needed right now. Granted, he wasn't the most exciting guy in the world, but surely over the past couple of years she'd had enough excitement to last her a lifetime. A lifetime she would now be spending with him. Bored out of her mind.
No, that wasn't fair. They'd had their moments, and Marcus had brought out a side of her that she'd never seen before. Not necessarily always a good side, considering her completely inappropriate behaviour at work lately, but different nonetheless. Her face flushed with shame at the thought of it, of what could have happened if they'd been caught. It felt like hypocrisy of the highest level considering all of the reprimands she'd given Lucifer over the years, something she would certainly never be able to do again. If he ever even gave her the chance to that is.
She had no complaints about the sex though. Her fiancé was quite obviously more experienced than she, and he had a way of convincing her to try things she would have never dreamed of doing in the past. The evidence closet being a good example of that. He was so willing to take risks that she couldn't help but wonder if he was hoping someone would walk in on them, and if that was indeed the case then she had a pretty good idea of who that someone was. It was almost as if this was his way of getting at Lucifer, staking his claim, marking his territory, making it clear that she was his now.
But that wasn't her Marcus. It had, after all, been Lucifer who had treated her like a prize in competition to be won, when there had really been no choice for her there at all. The man who called himself the devil was an eternal child, able to feel emotions but never quite able to deal with them. He just couldn't be the person she wanted him to be, no matter how many chances she gave him. For he was the partner who ran away when things became real, and Marcus was the man who came back.
Besides, she told herself, she was lucky really. At her age, to meet someone so desperate to be with her, who could understand the pressures of her job and would likely be a good stepfather to Trixie? He was the whole package in so many ways. He'd even saved her life once, and how many times do you get to be with your own personal hero?
You had a hero before. One who saved your life a hell of a lot more.
That was enough. She was supposed to be enjoying her last night out on the town as it were, yet all she'd done since they got here was sit in a dark corner contemplating the two men in her life. And that was supposed to be over now wasn't it? She'd made her decision. Marcus was the man she was going to marry, and Lucifer... well Lucifer would have to learn to live with that. Even if that meant she'd never see him again.
Even if she still missed him terribly.