Hello all! This is the rewrite of Inner Demons on my page. I had the idea for this character several years ago when I was truly invested in the Twilight fandom for the first time. I fell out of the fandom before I could finish the fic. Over the summer I began to take up writing the fic again after falling in love with the books and movies again, but I wasn't happy with how the pacing and characters were turning out. So, about a month ago I decided to begin rewriting it. The basic plot is the same and, of course, Valerie is the same. There are differences in the chapters, though.
So, my plan is to follow the book universe. This means Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett are Seniors. Also, since in the books Bella arrives in January, there will be some overlap with the original Twilight plot though I do have to admit it deviates since there's another character in the mix. Thank you, and I hope you enjoy it!
PROLOGUE
What Is and What Can Never Be
The rain was pouring down in sheets and under any other circumstances would have chilled me to the bone. Today, though, I felt numb to the core. It felt different though, like when lidocaine is used in dental procedures. I was well aware that I should feel something, but all I could feel was that empty space. The sun didn't even have the decency to show up for me. I hadn't imagined what this day would look like in detail, but I always thought the sun would be shining bright in the sky as people gathered to say goodbye. All of us would be standing together under the bright rays, smiling sadly at the memories as the life of a person was reduced to just that; memories.
Teenagers didn't often think about life after death. Why should they? Teenage hearts feel everything in full; emotions weigh them down and lift them up more than any adult. Teenagers fall in love harder, faster, but also break down with as much speed. An off comment made by an acquaintance was enough to send some adolescents into a spiraling pit of fear and anxiety, much less the question of what happens when a person dies. The inevitability of being reduced to absolutely nothing would be enough for any teenager to curl up in a ball and never leave the house again.
Yet, I stood on a hill watching a funeral from a distance; a funeral I'd imagined for months. In my visions, I was always in attendance. The least I could do was clear the distance and pay my respects to the person who died. I had to say goodbye lest the questions weigh me down. Where would they go now? Is there judgment for the way that person lived their life, or will they be forgiven in time?
I used to believe second chances were for fools. Now, though, I clung to the idea like a baby would a blanket. Everyone had a chance to make up for their sins by being grateful for the life they'd been allowed to live. I couldn't imagine not being forgiven for the sins of life for eternity. After all, forever is a long time.