And the Aftermath, Open Up Your Eyes.
You're So Alive.
Ok, so, after a really long, and unexcused, absence, I'm back. This is my version of what happens after the season finale. It all stems from something Shonda said in her writer's blog: "The bill was due." Now that the immediate threat is over, can everyone survive the recovery? The story picks up immediately where the finale left off. It will be heavy on the Callie and Arizona but will involve all of our Seattle Grace regulars. Now, on to the disclaimers.
First, I've rated this story mature and this time, I'm not kidding. We all know that our Grey's favorites have pretty good (read: GREAT) sex lives and I'm pretty sure their first reactions to such an intense situation would be sex, sex, and more sex. So, it seemed only natural that this story includes a little, ok, a lot, of smut. Consider it Grey's Anatomy, Uncensored.
As usual, and unfortunately, I don't own any of these characters or anything related to Grey's Anatomy. That's all Shondaland. Sigh…
Chapter 1: Caught in a Landslide, No Escape From Reality
VOICE OVER: When you save a life, it's a lot like that kiss. You know the one. The best kiss of your life. The one you remember in your dreams. The one you are always trying to recreate. It's the one you tell your friends about. Because time stopped during that kiss. Saving lives, that's kind of the same thing. Time stops, for just a moment, and you don't hear the sirens or the shouts or the machines all around you. For just one second there's silence; as though no one and nothing else exists in this world but you and the life you've saved. Or, you and the person you're kissing. And you're afraid to move, afraid to let go of the scalpel, afraid to end the kiss. Because that's when you have to pay the bill. Every single time. Something is owed for the greatest kiss of your life. Maybe a commitment or a goodbye, an apology, or sometimes just the sad realization that one great kiss can still be followed by really crappy sex. Something is owed. Just like something is owed when a life is saved: pain, a scar, a lifestyle change, someone else's organ. And we all know it's not the saving that's tough. It's the aftermath, the new reality. It's waking up alive only to find you can no longer walk; it's sharing that kiss with the one who's walking away. As surgeons, we're the good men in a storm. We're the badass chicks. But, still, the bill always comes due. So, we tell ourselves what we tell our patients: Open up your eyes. You're so alive.
Callie reluctantly ended their kiss and rested her forehead against Arizona's. She didn't open her eyes until she felt Arizona's hands surround her face. "Calliope, look at me. I love you, baby."
"Oh God." The tears that had been gathering in Callie's eyes overflowed. "I love you, too, Arizona. So much. And we, the kids, the ten kids, we—"
"Shhh. I know. There's a lot to talk about. A lot. But we have time. We have all kinds of time." Callie closed her eyes again. They have time. "We'll talk like crazy soon. We'll figure it all out Calliope. But right now," she gestured at the chaos surrounding them, "there're kids who need their parents and patients I need to see and—"
Callie pulled back with a shuddering breath. "I know, you're right. I have patients, too, and I'm sure the people in there need a lot of help right now."
"Exactly," Arizona pressed a light kiss to Callie's lips. "We need to find the Chief… Ahh, Dr. Webber, and get more information. Make sure our friends are safe and—"
"Oh my God! Mark. I need to see Mark, Arizona. I know the officer said he was fine but I need to—"
"I know. We need to see for ourselves that our friends are ok. We need to find Bailey and go visit Karev and Shepard, Grey, Hunt, Yang, everyone. So. Let's go do some rounds, make sure our patients are where they need to be. Then we'll talk to Webber and we'll head to Harborview. We'll see our friends and then we'll go home—Uh, we'll go to your place."
Callie smiled softly and grabbed Arizona's hand. She pressed a light kiss to her palm and said, "We'll go home. Together. And we'll talk. Later." Her smile grew. "Much later."
"Awesome." Arizona smiled her super magic smile.
"How much time do you think you need to do rounds?"
"Umm. I don't know. There aren't many doctors here right now so…"
Callie nodded. "Yeah. So we help by doing whatever needs to be done."
"That's what I was thinking."
"Why don't I text you when I can get free. You do the same and we'll try to coordinate. Sound good?"
"Sounds perfect." Arizona headed to the elevator that would take her to Pediatrics as Callie walked towards the Pitt.
"Hey, Arizona!"
Arizona turned in time to see Callie running towards her and onto the elevator just as the doors were about to close. "Calliope, you're going the wrong—" Her exclamation was cut off as Callie pressed her lips to Arizona's and moved her back against the wall. This kiss was slow and soft and full of heart. It was an 'I love you' kiss, more than an 'I want you' kiss. 'Thank you' instead of 'please'. And just when Arizona's knees threatened to buckle under the weight of such sweetness, the elevator dinged to announce its interruption. Callie pulled away and tossed "See ya" casually over her shoulder as she sauntered off the elevator.
"Whew." Arizona blew out a breath and smiled the rest of elevator's ascent.
At nearly one o'clock in the morning, Callie was standing behind a transportation ambulance when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Most of the staff had left the hospital, heading off to the bars where they would toast their friends, hospitals to wait for word on the injured, or just home to kiss their babies and sleep. Arizona, however, had run into Dr. Webber in Peds and promised him that she and Callie would stay as late as necessary to help coordinate the wholesale transportation of Seattle Grace-Mercy West patients to other facilities.
Callie was finally waving goodbye to her very last patient, an old man with bad knees and a flirty attitude. "Ok Mr. Stanley, you be nice to the people at Northwest. Seriously, no wooing the nurses with stories about how your kneecap was shot off during the invasion at Normandy. Just because they feel sorry for you doesn't mean you deserve their extra pudding."
"Aww, Dr. Torres, now why would I be trying to get their extra pudding?" He winked at the paramedic checking his IV. "Everyone knows you go for the jell-o at Northwest. Only Seattle Grace has the really good pudding, girl. Besides, did I ever tell you how, after those bastards shot my knees, I got up and kept storming them beaches? Tell me I don't deserve some damn pudding!"
"Mr. Stanley," Callie rolled her eyes before she shook her head and laughed. "You know what, you do whatever you want. Run those nurses ragged; you deserve it."
"Damn right I do girl. Now, you go get yourself straight after this mess. I'm not letting no other doctor touch my knees so I need you ready to go girl and soon."
"Yes sir. I promise." Callie nodded to the paramedic and stepped away from the ambulance. "We'll have you back here just as soon as we can Mr. Stanley."
As the ambulance drove away, Callie glanced at her phone and grinned when she saw a text from Arizona. God, she had turned into such a wuss, if just getting text messages again made her smile like a pre-teen.
'Just finished. U C Webbers email? Meet at benches when U R done. No rush. XOXO.'
Curious, Callie checked her e-mail as she headed down the hall.
Dear Seattle Grace-Mercy West personnel,
Due to today's tragedy, as well as the physical damage caused on our premises, Seattle Grace-Mercy West Hospital will be officially closed until Monday. The majority of patients are currently being transported to temporary facilities and all who wish to return to Seattle Grace-Mercy West will be brought back on Monday. I expect all regularly scheduled staff who are able to do so to report to the hospital as scheduled on Monday morning.
The hospital will take the next four days to repair what has been damaged and it is my very sincere hope that all of you use this time to find your own peace. Those of you who were present during today's lockdown may be called upon by the Seattle Police Department to give a statement and should remain available. Otherwise, please use this time to celebrate your own lives and to honor those that were given on this day.
The hospital grieves for the loss of five of its own. Dr. Reed Adamson, Dr. Charles Percy, Michela Nathan, RN and Officer James Wilson were valued members of the SG-MW family. They will be mourned and missed. I will update via employee e-mail any and all details I receive regarding funeral and/or memorial services. Hospital counselors are in the process of contacting the families of each of our deceased and I expect both respect and restraint will be afforded by our staff to these grieving relatives.
I would like to also personally add my deepest sympathy to all of you who have today lost colleagues, mentors and friends. As medical professionals we face death on a daily basis and yet the loss of five of our people shreds a hole in the fabric of each of our lives.
When facing the aftermath of any death, there is not an end to grief but merely a start to recovery. This process will be long; it will be scary; it will be filled with stress and chaos, sadness and despair. In the coming weeks our hospital will be swarming with uninvited guests. There will be lawyers, press, administration, and police. Our jobs as healers will battle with our responsibilities to ourselves and to our families in the wake of these events. Counselors will be on site to help each of you fight the very good fight and please do not hesitate to consult them. Together we will overcome this day, May 27, 2010, so that our friends will not have died in vain.
Sincerely,
Dr. Richard Webber
Acting Chief, Seattle Grace-Mercy West Hospital
Callie could feel tears staining her cheeks as she read the Chief's e-mail a third time. Fear for Arizona and herself, coupled with the confusion of temporarily shutting down a major hospital had made it easy to forget that there were five people killed inside her hospital today. Five people whose lives were stolen inside a building that was supposed to stand for sanctuary and refuge. Though Callie hadn't been particularly close to any of the victims, she took a moment to send up a personal prayer for each of the lost souls.
She remembered how embarrassed Reed had been the day Callie and Arizona found her in the NICU softly stroking a premature infant who was nestled against Alex Karev's sleeping, and very naked, chest. Reed had jumped and sheepishly shrugged her shoulders when Arizona coughed obviously into her hands. So Callie prayed that young Dr. Adamson found the same joy she had in that one quiet moment.
Dr. Percy was a throwback to Callie's stint at Mercy West and she prayed that he realized his tremendous potential. On her first shift as a SG-MW attending, Charles had paged her to treat a high school basketball player but before she could see the injury, he had distracted the teenager with a dirty and probably too-adult joke. While the boy was laughing, 'Doc Perce' had seamlessly popped the boy's dislocated shoulder back into place. Callie had used the distract-them-from-the-pain-you-are-about-to-cause trick herself and she was impressed with Charles's instincts. She remembered, too, how his eyes had widened when she told him he might want to consider a specialty in Ortho one day.
Moving into the locker room to change out of her scrubs, Callie thought back to the day her divorce was final. Somehow the entire hospital knew (because 'people talk') and she remembered hiding out in this very locker room, certain the entire hospital was whispering behind her back. It was Michela Nathan who barged into the doctors-only room, marched straight up to Callie and said "Today's going to suck for you. Trust me, I've been there. But, I'm on your service and just for today, I've got your back. So anything you need to make this day suck a little less, you just let me know." Just that, that no-nonsense support, had immediately set Callie more at ease. She knew Michela was the single mother of two teenage children and she prayed that those boys would one day be able to remember their mother with only joy and gratitude.
And finally, Callie sat on the locker room bench and said a special prayer for James. A retired Sergeant from the Seattle PD, James Wilson had come to work in security at Seattle Grace when his wife of 37 years got tired of repairing the windows his errant golf balls broke. During the four years he worked in the hospital's halls, Callie and James had greeted each other the same way:
"Hey, Sarge, you miss me?" Callie would ask.
"Like the Devil misses Holy Water, Doc. Like the Devil misses Holy Water," was James' reply and it never failed to make her laugh.
So she prayed for James, the one she would miss the most.
When Callie finally made it to the hospital entrance, she could see Arizona sitting on the closest bench. She was leaning against someone who had his armed wrapped around her shoulder. In a rush Callie realized the man holding Arizona was none other than Mark Sloan. She gasped and broke into a run. Arizona and Mark both stood when they heard Callie's approach and Mark caught his sobbing friend on the fly.
"Ohmygodohmygodohmygod," Callie repeated over and over.
Standing just behind their embrace, Arizona smiled and ran a light hand down Callie's ponytail as she watched her girlfriend bury her face in the neck of her former sex friend. Arizona knew Callie had been worried all day about Mark; they had spoken over the phone and assured each other that everyone was fine but nothing could that first moment of physical contact.
"Hey," Mark murmured into Callie's hair. "Hey. I told you I was ok."
"I know. I know you did but—But—I needed to see you."
"I know," he nodded. "I needed to see you too. Needed to make sure you and Blondie were really okay."
"We're fine. We're good." Callie reached out to grasp Arizona's hand while she still clung to Mark. "We're maybe even better than fine. At least the 'we' part."
"Yeah?" Mark questioned as he tipped Callie's face towards his. "Really?"
Callie sniffled and nodded, pulling Arizona to her side. "Yeah. We… Well, you know, we need each other."
"Yeah," Mark nodded sadly and Arizona cocked her head in sympathetic understanding. "I get that."
"Mark," Arizona touched a hand to his arm. "How's Lexie?"
"She's… I mean, physically she's fine. But she's… she's not good. No one's good. How can we be?"
"Yeah," Arizona nodded.
"She's with Karev. He's going to be ok but he's hurt pretty bad. She's going to stay with him tonight and I… I'm going to stay with her," Mark shrugged while Callie wrapped her arm around his waist.
"And everyone else?" Callie asked. "You've seen Cristina and Bailey and—"
"I saw Bailey at the hospital before she left to go be with Little Tuck. I guess Ben picked him up from school so she left. Meredith is with Derek. He's… Shit…." Mark ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "He's going to need a few more surgeries but Yang, she saved his life. Now Yang's kind of floating back and forth between Hunt and Meredith. Hunt's stable and should be able to go home tomorrow or the day after but he's going to need some serious PT to get that shoulder back in surgery shape. Umm… " Mark tried to remember what else the girls needed to know. "Oh. Cristina, she told me to tell you she wouldn't be at the apartment tonight. She asked about you, both of you, wanted you to know that she was ok and would see you tomorrow."
"Tomorrow? She'll see me tonight. We are headed to Harborview. We're going there now."
"Callie. Calliope." Arizona spoke softly and wrapped an arm around Callie's waist so that the three of them stood linked. "It's late. Really late, baby. We need to go home. We need to sleep. Harborview, they are swamped right now. And everyone is hurt and tired and done. I'm done. We need to be done."
"But—"
"She's right, Torres," Mark nodded. "Go home. Be together, just for tonight. Get some sleep. You can see everyone in the morning."
"I—" Callie started to protest but she knew Arizona and Mark were right. There was nothing more they could do tonight. "Ok. But we're going to be there early tomorrow morning, ok? I want to see everyone. I need to see Cristina and Lexie and… Teddy! What about Teddy? You didn't tell us about Teddy!"
"Shh, Torres. Robbins and I already talked about her. I haven't seen her. Hunt said she got out. They got out together and then he came back for Cristina."
"What?" The girls shouted together.
"Oh, hmm, didn't I tell you that part?" Arizona shook her head. "Yeah, well, he came back in when he heard Cristina was still in the hospital. Teddy, she left after that, I guess. I thought we'd see her at the hospital, you know, with Owen hurt and all but… I guess she felt like he made his choice." Mark shrugged, wondering if Lexie had made her choice as well. "Anyway, the Chief, he spoke to her. Said she was fine. Exhausted, but fine. So, I haven't seen her. Or April," he mentioned, almost as an afterthought. "That Jackson kid, you know, Avery? He was at Harborview for a while but April, I don't know where she is. Thought for sure she'd be by Derek's side. Anyway," he shook his head, "Altman will probably be around tomorrow."
"Yeah," Arizona agreed. "I'll give her a call in the morning. I'm sure she's pretty upset."
"Yeah. Listen, I should be getting back to the hospital. I need to talk Lexie into getting some sleep, somehow."
"She'll listen to you Mark. Whatever happens tomorrow, she'll listen to you tonight."
"Yeah. Maybe. Probably. Anyway, I should go." But the three of them just stayed in the same place, arms wrapped around each other's waist and gazing up at the lighted building.
Arizona finally broke the silence. "Does it look smaller to you? Everyone always says places look smaller after things like this. So, does it look smaller to you? 'Cause I'm not seeing smaller." After five seconds with no response, Arizona turned to Callie and Mark. "Guys?" She frowned when the two of them cracked up laughing. "What? What?"
"'I'm not seeing smaller,'" Mark mimicked while Callie laughed harder. "I don't know, Arizona, I definitely think it's shrunk."
"Yep, kinda like Mr. McSteamy after a cold shower," Callie smirked.
"Hey!" Mark exclaimed.
"Oh shut up, you two," Arizona huffed while she tried to hide her grin. "I was trying to have a moment but, you know, be assholes. I'm going home."
Callie hugged Mark one last time as they laughed before shouting, "Hey, wait for me."
"Catch up," was all Arizona said.
"Hey, Blondie!" Arizona turned to walk backwards and listen to Mark as Callie sprinted towards her. "Take care of my work wife," he grinned.
Arizona smiled back and let Callie collapse against her side. "That I can do," she whispered. "That I can definitely do."