Disclaimer: All recognizable Rizzoli & Isles characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners including, but not limited to Tess Gerritsen. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fanfiction story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No financial gain is associated with the publishing of this story. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: I have often been told that I don't write nearly enough multi-chapter fics. I am drawn to one-shots, particularly as they work so well for post-ep pieces and missing scenes. However, I have been toying for some time with the idea of committing myself to a longer piece that goes back to the beginning—that is, the beginning of the infamous friendship of Jane Rizzoli and Maura Isles. I don't want to set myself up for failure with the rigid equation of one chapter equaling one episode in the series, not only would that be a heavy burden it would make the piece ridiculously long. But I will return to scenes, dialogue and themes that will be familiar to regular viewers of the show. I hope you'll hang with me as I try to tackle this. I can't guarantee regular updates or that I'll bring this piece clear to the present with the show. I am indebted to Dorothy Snarker for her recaps of the episodes—an archive of brilliance I was able to access as I planned out this piece.
To Get Me To You
Dr. Maura Isles sat quietly at her desk as she browsed page after page of shoes on her laptop screen. While her employees were at lunch, surely socializing with one another, the doctor sat alone.
The fear of having made a mistake was crippling. She wasn't usually one to second-guess her decisions, but this was different. Being in Boston now was nothing like her time here as a student. She was older, yes, and with that came decidedly different needs. Sexual partners, dinner dates, those were easy enough to find, especially with her philanthropic connections. Truly meaningful relationships were another matter.
Her employees feared her; her colleagues were turned off by her brilliance. The only thing she was certain of was her ability to do her job.
"Dr. Isles?" Maura was startled out of the inventory of her life by a vaguely familiar voice.
"Yes?" Maura looked up. "Oh."
She was unable to hide her surprise as she saw in the doorway to her office a woman she had seen once before though in much different circumstances …or… different attire.
"I figured I would get that response," the tall woman smirked.
"I…" Dr. Isles was unsure of what to say.
"Officer Jane Rizzoli," the woman stepped forward and held out her hand.
Maura stood and shook the officer's hand. The last time they met this woman looked, for lack of a more polite word, like a whore. She was dressed like every streetwalker the doctor had ever seen and the doctor had, unfortunately, treated her poorly.
"I was undercover. Vice."
"I see. It's a pleasure to officially meet you, Officer Rizzoli," Maura smiled.
"Please, just Jane."
"Maura," the doctor was surprised at how comfortable she was with this rather intriguing stranger. "Would you like to sit down?"
"No, I need to go. I wanted to introduce myself in case, you know, we ran into each other again and I wasn't undercover," Jane gave the infamous Rizzoli smile.
"Thank you for stopping by," Dr. Isles smiled back.
The doctor sat and watched as the officer walked through the morgue toward the elevator bay. She hadn't been quite so captivated by anyone she had met since returning to Boston. Who was this woman and why had she felt immediately comfortable in her presence?
oOo
Five months later…
Dr. Isles sat at her desk, signing what seemed an endless stack of bureaucratic nonsense. When she took the position of Chief Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, she had no idea the sheer amount of paperwork that would be involved. There were a lot of things about this job she never truly prepared for, as a pathologist the only thing she was prepared for were the myriad of bodies that would come through the doors. She wasn't the type to be lonely, but there was something about being in Boston now that felt similar to loneliness.
"Dr. Isles," a voice broke the silence and immediately put a smile on the doctor's face.
"Office…er…Detective Rizzoli," Maura stood from her desk. "Congratulations on your promotion."
"If they let me keep it," Jane looked down, ashamed at her bandaged hands.
"Oh," Maura couldn't help but follow Jane's eyes and wonder about those healing hands. "I'm sorry about…"
"No, don't," Jane cut her off. "I came by to thank you for the flowers."
Dr. Maura Isles was a naturally inquisitive person. When she learned of what had happened to Jane Rizzoli at the hands of Charles Hoyt, she read every news story she could find and used her access to Boston Police Department records to retrieve the case files on Hoyt. Though she knew the facts of the case, she would never presume to know the psychological damage the serial killer must have left on the detective.
While the detective was in the hospital recovering from her encounter with Hoyt, the doctor didn't know what would be the appropriate thing to do, so, ever considerate, she sent flowers. She hoped Jane wouldn't find it odd and was pleased to learn she hadn't.
"You're welcome. I didn't know if you would be up for a visitor and when I called the hospital, I spoke to a woman who confused me for one of your doctors. She was quite frantic," Maura said.
This made the lanky detective chuckle.
"That was probably my mother," Jane said.
"Oh! I apologize for confusing her by introducing myself as Dr. Isles," Maura's anxiety snuck out.
"Don't worry about it," Jane smiled. "Ma is rather overbearing. She gets a little wound up when one of us gets hurt on the job."
"'One of us'?" Maura inquired.
"Frankie, my kid brother, he's a beat cop," Jane explained. "Just joined the force. Fresh out of the academy."
"It sounds like you have a strong tradition of public service in your family."
"Nah, we're making up for the other brother," the detective joked.
An awkward silence set in, Maura unable to find anything to say that wouldn't pry into the lives of the Rizzoli family. Despite her intrigue with the woman in her doorway, she said nothing as Jane stood fidgeting in self-consciousness.
"I should go," Jane said.
"It was good to see you, detective," Maura was able to say.
Offering a nod and a smile, Jane turned in the doorway to make her way out of the office.
"Hey, Dr. Isles?" Jane turned back to ask. "Would you like to have lunch sometime?"
"I…" Maura was stunned by the generosity of the detective. "Yes, I would like that."
Dr. Isles smiled. Could Jane Rizzoli be the friend she had been hoping to find?
oOo
"You did not!" Jane snorted as she put down her fork and wiped at her mouth with a napkin.
The woman sitting across from her was blushing after telling this relative stranger about her most recent date and how she had diagnosed the man on sight with a rare genetic disease.
"I thought he deserved to know," Maura shrugged. "Early treatment has proven effective."
Jane laughed out loud at this. She found the doctor both quirky and adorable, a rare combination for someone in her line of work.
"I haven't been on a date in awhile," Jane's voice became serious all of the sudden. "It's a little hard to explain away these…"
Jane lifted her hands and held them palms out for the doctor to see. There was pain in the detective's eyes that the doctor had no idea how to address. She hardly knew this woman, but she felt the deep desire to comfort her, soothe her pain. It was a strange sensation for Maura.
"I can't even begin to imagine," Maura was sincere.
"Anyway…" Jane grabbed for the bill. "Sorry to be a buzz kill."
"Buzz kill?" Maura was confused by the reference.
"You know, a party pooper? Mood killer?" Jane raised an eyebrow, she'd never met someone who was so obviously brilliant yet unable to grasp basic colloquialisms.
"Oh," Maura was embarrassed at how much she didn't understand. "You are certainly not a buzz kill, detective. Here, let me get this."
Jane Rizzoli's pride was now on full display. She refused to give up the bill and had already attached her credit card to the slip to hand to the waitress. She was not about to let the doctor pay for their lunch—their first lunch together.
"You get it next time," Jane smiled.
This brought a smile to the doctor's face. She hadn't driven the detective away. She was pleased to hear the detective would like to get together again. Maybe this would turn into something after all.
Just maybe.
oOo
Six weeks later…
Maura Isles was sitting at a bar called the Dirty Robber with three cops. It was a scenario she wouldn't have believed six months earlier. In fact, as she sat there it was still surreal. Making friends with Jane Rizzoli meant making friends with the people in Jane's life. In this case, her current partner Detective Barry Frost and her former partner Detective Vince Korsak.
While she continued to find herself out of place surrounded by cops in a social setting, she found herself strangely comfortable in the presence of Jane. They had easily fallen into a routine of spending time together whether at the bar after work or at a café for lunch. They had quickly become quite the team at a crime scene. Slowly she was learning about Jane—who she was, what she loved, why she was a cop.
"Time to call it a night," Korsak said as he stood up and put on his suit jacket. "Jane, Dr. Isles, it's been a pleasure."
Maura smiled at the detective, a man she had found to be wise and beyond helpful on cases. She wondered why he was no longer Jane's partner given the short amount of time the detective had been on the Homicide squad.
"I'm right behind you," Frost said, following the older detective and waving behind him at the two women at the table.
Jane reached for her own jacket, before placing her hand out on Maura's shoulder stopping her from standing. Her touch was surprising, not entirely unwanted by the honey-haired woman.
"Would you like to come over to my apartment?" she asked. "It's still early. I'm sure I have a bottle of wine and beer."
Maura found herself once again surprised by one of Jane's invitations.
"Yes, I would," Maura smiled.
The two women made their way out of the bar and seemed to decide on walking to Jane's apartment without a word exchanged between them. While they walked side-by-side in silence, Maura found herself continually glancing at the tall detective. She couldn't help but notice her beauty. Her raven hair was wavy and her understated makeup accentuated strong model-quality facial features.
"This is me," Jane slowed as they reached the steps outside her apartment building.
"What a great location," Maura followed Jane up the steps.
"It's no Beacon Hill, but it works for me."
This made Maura stall inside the front door of the building. Should she tell Jane that she was considering purchasing a home in the historic Beacon Hill neighborhood? She couldn't remember if she had told Jane where she currently lived.
"Don't tell me," Jane's face showed panic. "You have a Beacon Hill address?"
Maura shrugged her shoulders and began climbing the stairs again.
"Not yet," she answered.
Once they were inside Jane's apartment, Maura set down her purse and looked around the small, but warm apartment. It fit the detective perfectly. It wasn't fancy, yet it felt like a real home. It was everything Maura's condo was not. It felt lived in and welcoming.
"Would you like beer or wine?" came the voice from the small kitchen.
"Wine," Maura answered, walking toward the detective and taking a seat on a stool.
"Do you always drink wine?" Jane asked.
"Not always," the doctor answered. "But I do like it."
"I prefer beer," Jane said as she poured the doctor a glass of wine and reached for her bottle of beer.
"I've noticed."
"Yeah, what you see is what you get with me," she smirked.
Leaning against the kitchen counter, drinking her beer, Jane Rizzoli was easily the most interesting person in the world in that moment to Maura Isles. She couldn't help but watch the detective's every move. She had so many questions that had yet to completely form in her mind. She wanted to know everything about the detective.
"What?" Jane asked, noticing Maura staring.
"Sorry," Maura blushed and looked away.
Jane grabbed her beer and the wine bottle before walking toward the couch, assuming Maura would follow. The doctor followed, sitting with perfect posture on the detective's couch.
"Relax," Jane chuckled.
"Hmm?" Maura asked. She thought she was doing a good job of hiding her nerves.
"You don't have to be so, so…" Jane slouched against the arm of couch. "Put together. Get comfortable. Drink some more. Relax."
Maura smiled and leaned against the back of the couch.
"See? It's not so bad," she said while taking another gulp of her beer and put a foot up on the coffee table.
"I don't want you to be uncomfortable around me," Jane admitted.
"Oh, I am not uncomfortable," Maura assured her. "Quite the opposite, actually."
Jane raised an eyebrow at this.
"I'm not very good at social interaction," Maura explained. "I haven't really had many friends."
"That's sad!" Jane blurted. "Everybody needs friends."
Maura shrugged her shoulders and looked into her glass of wine. She knew she was awkward. She knew her intelligence could be intimidating. But she never really knew why she was terrible at making and keeping friends.
"Sorry, I tend to say what I'm thinking without, well, thinking."
"It's refreshing," Maura responded.
"Could you tell my mother that?" Jane laughed.
"Your mother sounds like an interesting woman."
"Interesting? More like irritating!" the detective shook her head. "She's a good mom, don't get me wrong, but sometimes I want to tell her to back off. It's the Italian in her, you know?"
At this Maura figured Jane was referring to the stereotype of Italian mothers. The stereotype she was familiar with despite having never met Jane's mother.
"Are you close to your parents?" Jane asked.
"Umm…" Maura considered how to answer this. "We don't see each other often. They are busy people."
"That's too bad," Jane tilted her head. "My family can be annoying, but I wouldn't trade them for anything."
Long buried pain was surfacing for Maura and she wanted nothing more than to change the subject.
"More wine?" Jane asked, holding the bottle over Maura's glass in anticipation.
"I won't be able to drive," Maura shook her head.
"I'll call you a cab," Jane said. "Or you're welcome to stay."
The offer was not as surprising to the doctor as it might once have been. The familiarity between them had grown quickly. Perhaps it was the wine or maybe it was simply the kind of person Jane Rizzoli was. Maura was beginning to feel as if she had known the person on the couch next to her for years.
The doctor noticed Jane rubbing her hands and found her mouth moving without thinking through what she was asking.
"Do they hurt?"
Jane looked down at her hands, stopped rubbing her palms and seemed embarrassed that the doctor had caught her.
"Sometimes."
"How many weeks of occupational therapy were you prescribed?"
"Eight," Jane cringed at the thought, something Maura took to mean it was a particularly long eight weeks as any type of physical or occupational therapy tended to be. "I quit after six."
This woman was deceptively complex. Underneath the sarcasm and bravado lived the hidden self-conscious person who hadn't had her detective's shield long and who had been bullied, ridiculed and questioned her entire life. To everyone else she was strong and brave on occasion, yet she was also fragile, unbelievably compassionate and harboring secrets that might one day spill out.
"This is none of my business," Maura hesitated. "I assume you had to see the BPD psychologist?"
She expected Jane to bristle. She did not.
"I did. It's required, you know?" the detective finished her beer.
Maura watched as the woman walked across the room to get another beer from the fridge. She began to worry that she had overstepped with her question.
"I didn't mean to…" she began when Jane returned to the couch.
"Hey, it's okay. It is what it is."
Looking at Jane, Maura once again saw the deep pain that had surfaced from time to time when she was observing her.
"Do you meditate?" the doctor's question was met with an inebriated guffaw.
"You're one of those, aren't you?" Jane teased.
"Which?"
"Yoga, health food, meditation?" the detective's tone was both light and yet not accusatory.
"Is that a bad thing?" Maura wondered.
"For you? No. For me? Definitely."
Maura shook her head and realized that Jane Rizzoli was truly her opposite in every way. And stubborn. It would take a great deal of prodding to convince the detective that meditation might be good for her.
"I'm going to grab another beer, my fifth tonight if you're keeping score. Something tells me that wouldn't jibe with your healthy lifestyle."
When Jane returned to the couch she was grinning ear to ear. It was going to take some getting used to, the joking and sarcasm of Maura's new friend.
"I have a weakness for Girl Scout cookies," she volunteered to the delight of her audience.
"Shocking!" Jane placed a hand over her heart, a mocking gesture.
Looking at the bottle of wine, the doctor couldn't decide if she should stop or not. Though she'd only had three glasses of wine, she, like the detective, was feeling slightly buzzed without the ability to self-censor.
"Another glass won't kill you," the dark-haired woman noticed the inner struggle the doctor was having.
"I'll have to stay," Maura revealed. "I don't feel comfortable taking a cab when inebriated. I don't trust my safety."
"You can take my bed and I'll sleep on the couch," she offered.
"No, this is your house. I can sleep on the couch."
Jane busied herself collecting a blanket, pillow and sleeping attire while Maura slipped off her heels.
Despite having gathered everything for bed, neither woman had any intention of abandoning their drinks or actually sleeping. It would be the first night of their friendship where they spoke freely until the early hours of the morning. And it wouldn't be the last.
oOo
Maura Isles was wide-awake. It was nearing four in the morning and by her best estimate she had been lying on this quite uncomfortable couch for over an hour staring at the ceiling.
When she and Jane had agreed it was time to get some sleep, she felt exhausted, but as soon as she got settled in and Jane retired to her room, she found she was wide-awake. The doctor's very busy mind was repeating the various things she had talked about with the detective tonight. Every few minutes she couldn't suppress the smile that broke out on her face. Tonight was one of the best nights she could remember having in years. It was laid back in a way that she was unaccustomed to. She had been more open than she usually was. And she felt at ease with Jane.
Wiping the smile quickly off her face was what Maura thought sounded like whimpering. She listened carefully for the noise to repeat. When it did she was now certain it was whimpering and it was without question coming from the part of the apartment where she assumed Jane's bedroom was.
It didn't take the genius doctor long to remember the details of Jane's encounter with Hoyt. She immediately considered the possibility that Jane had suffered from nightmares since what she believed must have been an unimaginable event in the detective's life.
Maura found herself panicking.
The sound echoed in the quiet apartment once again.
Should Maura attempt to wake Jane? She knew the risks of waking someone in the midst of sleepwalking, but she couldn't remember if any existed for those in the midst of a nightmare. As a pathologist, she never had to study parasomnia. However, the cause of her panic had to do with her new friendship with Jane. Did they know one another well enough at this point for Maura to approach the sleeping woman in her bedroom and wake her? She also wondered about her own ability to comfort another person. Could she?
The sound came louder this time. Maura made a split-second decision.
Approaching the detective's bedroom, she wasn't surprised to find her friend tangled in the bedding. She was, however, surprised by how heartbroken she felt at the sight of the clearly distressed woman.
"Oh, Jane," Maura whispered to herself.
She stood in the doorway for a moment, waiting to see if the whimpering was over. She took a moment to take in her surroundings, noticing how simply the room was furnished and how it fit Jane's personality perfectly.
Instead of a whimper, Jane cried out. It startled the doctor.
No longer able to stomach what she was seeing, Maura stepped toward the center of the room and stooped near the edge of the bed.
"Jane," Maura whispered. "Jane, wake up."
Her cries returned to whimpers. The doctor noticed her hair was matted from profuse sweating. She found herself wanting to reach out to move the hair out of Jane's face. She didn't.
"Jane," she said again, this time a bit louder.
When she received no response she moved positions so she was now perched on the edge of the bed. She thought the detective might feel her presence this way.
Watching Jane writhe in her bed, her legs constantly moving, her fists clenched, Maura wanted nothing more than to relieve Jane of the pain she was obviously in.
"Jane, it's me," she said. "You're having a nightmare."
She gently placed a hand on Jane's arm and could feel the twitching muscles.
"Jane," she raised her voice a bit higher and gave a gentle squeeze to a forearm.
This caused Jane to jerk awake. Without warning, Maura found her wrist in the tight grip of her friend. Though she wasn't fearful, despite the vice-like grip on her wrist, she was concerned with what Jane would say about Maura having come into her bedroom to wake her up.
"It's just me," she assured her.
The terror had not left Jane's face and she continued to clench the doctor's wrist.
"Oh, god," Jane was mortified by the situation.
"It's okay," Maura nodded toward her wrist and Jane immediately let go.
"I…" Jane started.
"You don't have to explain."
Maura stood from the edge of the bed and walked out of the dark bedroom. When she returned with a glass of water, Jane was sitting up, her hands covering her face.
"Here," she offered the glass. "You need to rehydrate. You've been sweating."
"I'm sorry," Jane groaned after she downed the glass of water.
"There's nothing to be sorry for," the doctor was at a loss as to where she should stand.
The brunette nodded to the edge of the bed, inviting Maura to sit.
"I doubt I should say this," she began, "but I can't imagine what you went through."
The detective was caught off guard, but she figured the curious doctor must have known all about her encounter with Charles Hoyt. As much as she liked Maura and as comfortable as she felt with her, she couldn't bring herself to talk about what had happened. Not with Maura and not with anybody else.
"We don't have to talk about it," Maura backtracked.
She suddenly felt terrible for even mentioning it. In the short time she'd known Jane Rizzoli, she had never known her to talk about the event that had changed her life. She certainly shouldn't have expected Jane to talk about it now. Not after a nightmare.
"Do you, umm, mind staying in here for a little while?" Jane's voice was wavering.
Maura had never seen the timid, vulnerable side of her friend until now.
"Not at all," Maura answered without hesitation.
Walking around the bed and climbing on top of the bedding, Maura wasn't sure what she was supposed to do.
"Just be here," Jane whispered.
"Okay."
They both stared at the ceiling for an incalculable time. Neither said anything. After awhile the ever-vigilant doctor noticed Jane's breathing slowing to a normal pace, a sign that she was no longer distressed. Maura kept thinking about how embarrassed Jane was and it made her sad. Jane should have someone in her life to hold her on nights like this. She shouldn't have to fight these battles alone.
Looking over at the detective, Maura noticed she had fallen asleep. There would be no more sleep for the doctor. Whether she was uncomfortable or afraid Jane would slip into another nightmare, she wasn't sure. The entire situation was foreign to her and she couldn't interpret her own feelings. She had not felt this protective of another person in her life.
Is this what true friendship was?
oOo
To be continued…