DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TOUHOU PROJECT!
"Oh my gooooooood! I'm so booooored!" Flandre whined, tossing a random brick at her mirror and shattering it.
The clean-up-committee ran in and swept up the mess and then replaced the mirror with a new one. Then they ran out of the room like little munchkins.
"WAIT! COME BACK!" Flandre yelled desperately after them.
"NOOOOOO! SHE'S GOING TO EAT ME!" One of the munchkins yelled.
Flandre heard screaming and the sound of the munchkins running up the stairs.
"Come back, munchkins!"
"We're fairies, not munchkins!"
"Please play with me..." Flandre whimpered, and then sat down on the ground. It was more of a "slammed-her-butt-into-the-floor" type of sit down, though. She farted on impact, releasing a horrible smell into the air.
"Yuck! Man, I really need to stop eating so many bean burritos. They aren't very good for my digestive system," Flandre said out loud to nobody in particular.
Suddenly, she heard the many locks on the door coming off and the door opened, revealing her older sister, Remilia Scarlet.
"Flan!" Remilia exclaimed, running over to her sister and giving her a great big hug. "It's raining outside, so you can wander around in the mansion now. You can't escape because of the water, so it's totally okay," Remilia explained.
"YAAAAAY! I GET TO LEAVE THIS BORING HELL OF A PLACE! BYE-BYE!" Flandre exclaimed, shooting up the stairs.
"Wait, Flan! Flandre! Come back! You forgot your clothes!" Remilia yelled after her.
Flandre glanced down at herself and found that she was indeed naked. "Oh yeah!" Flandre yelled back, flying back to grab her clothes. "Sorry about that, sis. I kind of destroyed my clothes and didn't notice it until just now," Flandre explained, pulling her shirt over her head. "Okay, cool thanks, BYEEEEEE!" Flandre said joyfully, running out of her room like there was an 80% off Black Friday deal that she couldn't miss.
As Flandre flew down the halls of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, everything blew up behind her. Sakuya came flying out of the explosion and landed on her face.
"Uggggh...my PADS..." Sakuya groaned.
"HA! I KNEW IT! YOU JUST ADMITTED TO WEARING PADS!" Flandre laughed. "Man, I wish I would've got that on tape! It would've gone viral!"
Sakuya rose from the floor and towered over Flandre. "What? No, I said, 'Ugggh...my ribs...'"
"No, you didn't, you totally said PADS!" Flandre protested.
A random fairy maid floated by.
"Hey! Munchkin!" Flandre called to the fairy maid.
"We're not munchkins!"
"Did Sakuya say PADS or ribs?" Flandre asked the fairy maid.
"I heard PADS. Please don't call us munchkins," the fairy maid pleaded.
"Okay. Thanks, munchkin!" Flandre said, thanking the fairy maid, who floated away after being called 'munchkin'. Again.
Flandre whipped back around to face Sakuya. "See? I have a witness. You're totally wearing PADS. Anyway, I've got a whole world of youkai and psychopaths to destroy. BYEEE!" Flandre exclaimed, running away with a big goofy grin on her face.
She ran down the halls until she got to the front room in the mansion.
"WOAH!" Flandre gasped as she looked around the room. A huge chandelier was hanging from the ceiling. A fairy was hanging off the edge of it, singing, "I CAME IN LIKE A WREEEEECKING BAAAAALL!"
"Man, I really need to get out more. I wonder why Remilia doesn't let me outside more often. Probably because she's afraid that I'll escape from the mansion and fuck up everyone's lives. She has a reason to be afraid," Flandre said to nobody in particular, chuckling to herself.
The fairy on the chandelier fell off and died immediately. The clean-up-committee ran in and cleaned up the mess.
"That's the third one today. Why does everyone want to be like Miley Cyrus all of a sudden?" The lead fairy maid asked.
The other fairy maids shook their heads and looked up to see yet another fairy getting on the chandelier.
"Oh well. There are like billions of us anyway, so losing a few is all right," The lead fairy decided.
The other fairies nodded, and they floated away.
Flandre approached the big, tall, black set of double-doors that lead to outside the mansion. She put her ear up against the door and listened for rain, but she couldn't hear anything.
"Did Remilia lie to me!?" Flandre exclaimed, kicking the door. Her foot suddenly hurt. A lot. "FUCK! DAMN FUCKING DOOR!" Flandre cried out in pain, swearing under her breath. "DAMN DOOR! DIEEEEEEEE!" Flandre shouted, destroying the door until the door was just a mere idea. It was as if the doors had never been there.
Flandre gasped when she saw that it was night time, and that there was barely any rain pouring down outside.
"Well, technically Remilia lied to me, so I'm leaving now. Bye, SDM. We have shortened your name to 'SDM' because it's too hard to say 'Scarlet Devil Mansion'. Bye!" Flandre called to the house, and then took off into the air. A drop of water fell on her head and she immediately felt like dying.
"WHAT IS THIS FEELING?! WHY DOES MY HEAD FEEL WEIRD?!" Flandre asked nobody in particular. "Oh wait a minute. That's just what it feels like when I get wet. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh..."
Flandre continued on into the night. She saw someone run out of Eirin's clinic as she passed over the Bamboo Forest.
"WAIT! COME BACK! I DIDN'T MEAN TO SAY THAT!"
"NOOOOO! I DON'T WANT TO BE A TEST SUBJECT ANYMORE!"
Flandre heard shouting from below and saw a tall rabbit-lady running away from an old lady. Oh, that must be Eirin. I should go say hi, Flandre thought to herself. Nah. Saying "hi" is something someone normal would do.
Flandre kept on flying until the rain began to grow heavier, and she found it harder to fly through the rain.
"Shit!" Flandre cursed. "Now what am I going to do?"
Flandre, with her Christmas-light wings folded up so they wouldn't get wet, trudged through the mud. She found it EXTREMELY difficult to walk through the wet dirt. Because that's what mud is: wet dirt.
"UGH! MUD SUCKS! DIEEEEEEEE!" Flandre yelled, destroying the mud. That's her solution to everything: if there's a problem, kill it.
Suddenly, Flandre saw a huge random hole in the middle of the ground. I'll hide in there! Flandre thought, jumping into the hole.
She realized how deep it was when she jumped in and began falling. She couldn't use her wings because they were wet, rendering them useless.
"AAAAAAAAH!" Flandre shrieked as she fell down the hole. Suddenly, her dress flipped up, and all of her Target gift-cards flew out. "NOOOOO! THAT ONE HAD $1,000 ON IT!" Flandre exclaimed, trying to grab it.
"Oooh, a gift-card! Thanks!" A random lady with weird ears said, snatching the gift-card out of the air.
"IDIOOOOOOOOOT!" Flandre yelled as she continued falling. Yup, she was still falling.
Shit, how deep do people need to dig before they're done digging? Flandre thought. Oh wait. I think I see the bottom.
Flandre's butt slammed into the ground. She farted on impact, causing her to shoot back up into the air again. "WEEEEEEEEEEE!" Flandre cheered as she flew into the air. Again.
Then Flandre hit the ground again and felt very sad inside that she was already at the bottom.
"Well, crap. What now?" Flandre said to nobody in particular, staring at the dark hallway ahead of her. "Cool! A creepy hallway that is most likely filled with Eirin's kind(old ladies), dead bodies, and so much more!"
"Nah, no old ladies here. Just me, my older sister, Okuu, and Rin," a voice said from behind her.
"WAAAAAH!" Flandre cried out, nearly jumping out of her skin. She turned around to see a girl that looked like she was her age and height wearing a cute hat and dress. "Sorry, you just scared the shit out of me. I'm Flandre, an explorer," Flandre said, holding out her hand.
"Pleased to meet you. I'm Koishi, a psychopath," Koishi said, taking Flandre's hand strongly and shaking it.
"Really? I'm a psychopath too!"
"Wow! We just met and we already know each other's favorite ice cream flavor!" Koishi cheered.
"Wait, ice cream? You like ice cream too?! COME ON, BFF! LET'S GO GET SOME ICE CREAMZ!" Flandre exclaimed, taking Koishi by the hand and leading her down the dark alley.
"F-Flandre! That's not the way to the ice cream! Oh, I see. You were going to blast a hole in the wall to get there. Gotcha," Koishi said calmly as she was dragged along by Flandre.
"I HATE YOU, WALL! DIEEEEEEEE!" Flandre yelled, kicking the wall. It died immediately.
Flandre saw a girl with purplish-pinkish hair eating ice cream with a bird and a cat. "Oh, hi bird. Hi cat. Hi random girl. We're going to steal some of your ice cream real quick," Flandre said, grabbing the tub of ice cream and two spoons.
"Wait, who are you? And what are you doing here?" The purplish-pinkish haired girl asked.
"Oh, this is Flandre, my new friend. We're BFFS! We haven't taken any selfies together yet, but we will soon," Koishi explained.
"Oh, okay. Carry on," the purplish-pink haired girl said, waving them off and turning back to the bird and the cat.
"Yay! Come on, Flandre! I wanna show you the Underground World Lair Castle Mansion thing!" Koishi said, grabbing Flandre by the hand and dragging her down the hall.
They arrived in a weird place with a bunch of signs that read CAUTION in big black letters. The two girls took a seat on the edge of the platform walking thingy and shared the rub of ice cream. Several times, they got brain freezes, and went on psychotic rampages throughout the underground lair. Then they ended up taking a bunch of selfies with each other and clogging up a bunch of space on Satori's phone.
"Wow, this is fun," Flandre said, taking another bite of ice cream. They had taken one of the jumbo-sized tubs, so they would never, ever, ever run out of ice cream.
"I know, right? My sister, Satori, will play with me sometimes, but it was never as fun as this!" Koishi exclaimed.
"My sister keeps me locked up in the basement. This is the first time I've ever gotten to play with someone besides Sakuya or Remilia. And they barely play with me at all. I feel so free right now!" Flandre replied.
"Who are Sakuya and Remilia?"
"Sakuya is a maid who denies the fact that she wears PADS, and Remilia is my older sister. We're both vampires, so she can only let me out when it rains, since rain slows us down and makes us unable to fly," Flandre explained.
"Satori and I are both satoris. I used to be able to read people's minds, but I closed my eye a long time ago," Koishi replied.
"Why'd you do that?"
"I can't remember."
The two girls were silent for a moment, swinging their feet back and forth over the edge of the platform thing. They watched nuclear chemicals swim around below. There was the occasional uproar of chemicals, but other than that, it was silent.
"F-Flan?" Koishi stuttered.
"Yeah?"
"I know I only just met you, but...I..."
"You what?"
"I...l-lo..."
"Shh...no more words need to be said..." Flandre whispered, putting a finger to Koishi's lips. "I've never done this before, so...I'm sorry if I'm bad at it," Flandre said, leaning into Koishi's face.
Koishi leaned into Flandre, pushing her lips lightly onto Flandre's. Flandre moaned happily into Koishi's mouth, making her blush. Flandre could feel the heat rising to her face as she closed her eyes and pushed Koishi to the ground, still kissing her as she did so.
Flandre got on top of Koishi and tried to put her tongue into Koishi's mouth. Koishi gave the vampire-girl permission, allowing Flandre to run her tongue on every surface of her mouth. Soon, Flandre knew all of Koishi's sensitive spots inside of her mouth: the tops of her teeth, the part underneath her tongue, and the roof of her mouth.
They broke away, a bead of saliva still connecting them. Koishi panted from the kiss that they had just shared. "Th-that was...amazing!" Koishi gasped. "F-Flandre...more please..."
Flandre couldn't help it. Koishi was just too cute. So the little vampire girl leaned into Koishi and got on top of her, kissing Koishi with much more force than she had been before. Flandre shoved her tongue into Koishi's mouth as hard as she could, causing Koishi to let out a very loud and erotic moan.
They rolled around on the platform thingy, still connected by their lips. At times, they almost rolled off, but Koishi always saved them at the last moment. When they broke away, they stared at each other for a long time with a loving look in their eyes, not saying anything.
"Do you wanna...go to my room?" Koishi asked, blushing a very deep shade of red.
"S-sure...if you want to..." Flandre replied, blushing as well.
-Meanwhile, in the Scarlet Devil Mansion...-
"UGH! Why do they keep on jumping off the chandelier?! Don't they know that they're going to die if they fall off?" Sakuya asked the lead fairy maid.
The Lead Fairy Maid(LFM) shrugged. "I honestly don't know, Chief. It's like they're all trying to commit suicide," LFM suggested.
A loud thump was heard from the front room and Sakuya and LFM ran in to see that yet another fairy maid had fallen off the chandelier. They looked up to see another one mount the chandelier.
"HEY! YOU! GET OFF OF THERE AND GET BACK TO WORK!" Sakuya shouted to the fairy maid.
"Oh, sorry! I'll get down right away!" The fairy maid promised. Then she fell off and died immediately.
"We're going to need a bigger graveyard," Sakuya sighed, shaking her head. "LFM, would you mind getting some of the non-suicidal fairy maids to begin making the graveyard that we have for Flandre's old pets larger?"
"I'll get right on it! But...where's the graveyard?" LFM asked.
"Behind the mansion. Now get on it, please."
"Right away!" LFM stated, saluting and then flying off in the direction of some random fairies cleaning the staircase for the one-millionth time that day.
"SAAAAAAKUUUUUUYAAAAAA! WHERE IS FLANDRE?!" Remilia exclaimed, running into the room at lightning speed and bending over because she was out of breath.
"I don't know. I thought you had let her roam the mansion because it was raining outside," Sakuya answered.
"I did, but it stopped raining, and now I can't find her! Sakuya, will you pleeeeeaaaase go look for her?" Remilia begged, getting down on her knees. "I'm so worried! What if she destroys Gensokyo? If she did that, there would be no more drinking contests at Reimu's shrine!"
"Don't worry, mistress. I will find her for you," Sakuya reassured Remilia.
Remilia wiped her eyes. "Good. Thanks, Sakuya," Remilia said, getting up from the floor and heading back into the depths of the mansion.
"Great. I've got a psychotic vampire-girl to find and I don't even know where to get started," Sakuya mumbled sarcastically. She took flight and flew out of the mansion in the opposite way that Flandre had flown.
-In Koishi's Room-
Flandre pushed Koishi gently onto the bed in Koishi's room. She sprang onto the bed in a way that was similar to a cat's way of jumping and crept toward Koishi like an animal stalking its prey. She stopped when she reached Koishi and cuddled the satori-girl in her arms. "You know I love you, right Koishi?" Flandre asked.
"Y-yes," Koishi replied, blushing.
"And do you love me back?"
"Yes, of course," Koishi replied with no hesitation.
"Then you won't mind if I do this, right?" Flandre asked, pulling up Koishi's dress and groping her small breasts.
"Oh!" Koishi gasped in pleasure, leaning into Flandre, who was attacking her from behind.
"Do you like this, Koishi?" Flandre asked in a sexy tone.
"Yes, very much, Flandre! Ooh! Aaaah~!" Koishi gasped.
Flandre smiled in satisfaction and slowly moved her hands down Koishi's stomach to the line of clothing that marked where her panties began. Flandre withdrew her hand from Koishi's dress and sat up, wishing to change positions.
"Koishi, please sit up," Flandre pleaded.
Koishi did as she was told and sat up, allowing Flandre to take off her dress and underwear, leaving her with nothing on. She felt her body begin to heat up when she saw Flandre undressing as well. When Flandre was completely naked, she gasped at her beauty.
"Flandre, you're beautiful," Koishi blurted out, blushing.
"No, you are. You're so cute, Koishi," Flandre told her.
"What would you like me to do, Mistress Flan?" Koishi asked in a sexy way, smiling and winking at Flandre.
Flandre's nose exploded with blood immediately. She quickly found a tissue box to stop the blood and returned to Koishi. "Sorry. That was just too much for me!" Flandre said. Then she sat up against the pillows and motioned for Koishi to come to her. "I'd like you on your back please," Flandre requested.
Koishi felt her body shiver with excitement as she laid down with her legs closed tightly together. "Now what, Mistress?"
"Spread your legs open wide," Flandre commanded.
Koishi obeyed, gasping as cold air hit her vagina. She had never masturbated before, nor had any sex, so her body was new to this way of treatment.
She saw Flandre's arms slither toward her. Koishi felt Flandre's hands brushing up and down over the inside of her thighs, causing her to gasp. "Oh...yes..." Koishi moaned. "Flandre..."
"What would you like me to do?" Flandre asked Koishi.
"Flandre...my...my p-pussy..."
"Your pussy...?"
"I would like you to put your fingers inside of me, Flandre!" Koishi begged.
Flandre was more than happy to obey as she stopped teasing Koishi and began to slowly creep toward her vagina's opening. Flandre almost put her finger inside, but then stopped.
"Flandre? Why'd you stop?" Koishi asked, disappointment heavy in her voice.
The vampire looked up at the satori. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Flandre asked.
"Of course I do, Flandre. Having you touch me makes me feel so happy. It lets me know that you love me."
Flandre nodded, and then lightly inserted her middle finger inside of Koishi. Koishi winced from the pain and felt like she was going to cry.
"Are you okay?" Flandre asked, concerned.
"Y-yes, please keep going. I can handle the pain. Besides, it goes away after a bit, right?"
"It will eventually," Flandre promised, and then inserted the rest of her finger inside Koishi.
Koishi winced again as she felt Flandre's finger brush the edge of her womb, but quickly shrugged it off as Flandre withdrew her finger and inserted it back inside of Koishi once more. With each thrust of her finger, the pain began to be replace by pleasure.
"Please go faster, Flandre...oooh!" Koishi gasped as Flandre sped up the pace.
"I'm sorry if I'm bad at this. I've never done this before; I've only seen this stuff in Patchouli's library on rainy days..." Flandre apologized.
"No, you're greaaaaaaat!" Koishi gasped. "Flandre, something is coming!" Koishi screamed with pleasure.
"You're going to come!" Flandre told her, and began to suck on Koishi's clit.
"AAAaaaaAAAAAAHHHH~!" Koishi squealed as she squirted all over Flandre's face.
Flandre smiled as she licked the juices off of her face with her tongue. "You're very tasty, Koishi," Flandre giggled, licking her lips. There was still cum all over her cheeks and nose, but she didn't mind it.
-Meanwhile, in the middle of nowhere...-
"Damn it!" Sakuya cursed, throwing a knife at a random bird on the ground. It missed, because there's a 8% chance that Sakuya's aim will miss, and that time was one of those times.
"Where is Flandre? There are no signs that she destroyed anything...this is harder than I expected," Sakuya muttered to herself. She trudged through the mud. It wasn't raining anymore, but there was still mud on the ground. Mud is SO annoying. It gets stuck on the bottom of your shoes and then you have to clean it off.
"Good thing I'm wearing anti-mud shoes," Sakuya said out loud to nobody in particular. Then something caught her eye.
A huge, random, weird-looking hole was in the middle of the ground. Sakuya ran over to it and peered down, seeing how deep it was. Damn, how deep do people need to dig before they're done digging? Sakuya thought to herself.
Oh well. This looks like somewhere Flandre would go, so I'm going to check it out. Down I go! Sakuya thought, jumping happily into the hole.
Sakuya was so happy that she got to jump into a random hole in the middle of nowhere. She kept falling.
And falling.
And falling.
Until she hit the ground and farted on impact, causing her to fly back up again. That's a thing that happens to the residents of the SDM. When their butts get hurt, they fart.
"Ugh...where am I?" Sakuya asked, looking around at her surroundings. She got up off the floor, brushing herself off with the edges of her hands.
Sakuya quickly took note of the large tunnel thingy in front of her, which she decided to follow. It was a little dark in the tunnel, but she was still able to see because of the torches on the sides of the walls.
"HULLO? DO YOU WANT MY GIFT-CARDS?" Sakuya asked the tunnel, hoping someone would come out.
No response.
"Damn it! That trick works every time, though!" Sakuya cursed, and then continued walking down the tunnel. "Wait, can't I just fly?" Sakuya thought out loud, and flew down the tunnel until she came into a kitchen-looking room with a bird, a cat, and a random girl in it.
"Uh...hi. I'm Sakuya Izayoi, the head maid of the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Have you seen a little vampire-girl walk through here? She's about this big," Sakuya said, bringing her hand to her waist, "and she has blond hair and red eyes. Have you seen her?"
"Yes, actually, we have. Koishi was playing with her earlier, wasn't she? Flandre, wasn't it?" Satori recalled.
"Yes, Flandre Scarlet. Which direction did she go?" Sakuya asked them.
The bird pointed to the platform-thingy room. "That way. Toward the Nuclear Fusion Room," the bird informed her.
"Thank you very much. Sorry if I'm intruding," Sakuya apologized, and then flew in the direction the bird had been pointing.
She arrived in a room with green walls and signs that read CAUTION everywhere. "Wow. Pretty sweet place," Sakuya observed. "Now, if I were Flandre, where would I go?" Sakuya asked herself.
She flew around the room, looking for Flandre, but found no sign of her. "Flandre!" Sakuya called, flying out of the room. She flew toward a group of doors and found one that read: Koishi's Room. Do not disturb.
"Well, it says Do not disturb on it, so I guess I can't go in. I guess I'll just wait until whoever is in there comes out," Sakuya said, sitting on the floor next to the door.
"Oh, Koishi! Koishi, more! More! Ah! aaaaAAAAAH~!" A muffled voice cried out from inside the room.
"Wow, you came so much," another muffled voice said.
Sex? But their voices...they sound so young... Sakuya thought to herself. Wait...Koishi? Didn't that purplish-pink-haired girl say something about Flandre playing with her? Could Flandre be in there? Sakuya thought to herself, worried. What would Remilia say if she found out Flandre had been having sex with someone?! She would flip out! Remilia is so protective of her little sister...she would never allow someone to have sex with her unless she approved of it...
"Ah, that was so much fun..." The voice that sounded a lot like Flandre's sighed blissfully.
"It sure was. Thank you for that, Flandre. I love you," The voice that must've been Koishi's agreed.
SO IT IS FLANDRE!? OH, SHE IS SOOO GOING TO GET IN TROUBLE! I'M GOING TO GO TATTLE-TALE TO REMILIA! MAYBE I'LL GET EXTRA PUDDING FOR DESSERT! Sakuya thought evilly. But that would be mean. Besides, they didn't think I would come here and listen to them outside Koishi's bedroom. I just violated their privacy...oh well. They're not important anyway. I'll just go back to Remilia and tell her that Flandre made a new friend. She'll be happy, I'm sure of it, Sakuya thought to herself, rising from the floor. As she rose, her coupon book fell out of her dress. "Fuck! MY COUPONS!" Sakuya exclaimed, and then covered her mouth. Shit! They heard that! And Flandre will know it's me!
Sakuya picked up her coupon book off the floor and teleported away using her maaaaagical time-stopping powers. She walked into the SDM and slumped into one of the front room's many chairs. "God, that was tough..." Sakuya said out loud.
LFM came up to Sakuya. "You've returned, Chief! We have extended the graveyard and buried the bodies, just as you have requested!" LFM said EXTREMELY joyfully.
"Good work, LFM. Please tell the other fairies to retire for the night. It has been a long day," Sakuya ordered.
"Yes, Chief, right away!" LFM said, and went to go tell the other fairies the news.
"So, did you find Flandre?" Remilia asked Sakuya.
"You scared the shit out of me, mistress. Please do not sneak up on me like that," Sakuya said calmly. "Yes, I found Flandre. She made a new friend: a girl her age who has abilities like her," Sakuya made up.
"That's great! Flandre really needed some more friends. Anyway, you can retire for the night now, Sakuya. Good work," Remilia said, waving her off.
Sakuya gladly went to sleep. It had been a long night for her.
-Koishi's Room-
"Flandre, will you stay the night, please?" Koishi pleaded, hugging onto Flandre.
"Sure! I'd love to," Flandre told her.
Koishi kissed Flandre softly on the lips. "I'm glad you were my first, Flandre," Koishi said, turning out the lamp on her desk.
"I'm glad you were too."
"Flandre, will you marry me?" Koishi asked.
"Aren't we already married?"
"Well...yeah..."
"We'll need rings. But other than that, we're already bound to each other through love and sex," Flandre whispered.
"Oh, I love you Flandre," Koishi said, kissing Flandre softly on the lips once more. Flandre kissed her back with a little more force than Koishi was using.
"I love you too. I love you so very much. You were my first, Koishi," Flandre told her.
"How will we keep seeing each other when you have to go back to the mansion?"
"I won't go back to the mansion, if I don't have to. I'll stay here with you, Koishi, for as long as I can."
Well, that's the end of this story. Or chapter. I don't know if I want to continue this or not. I really enjoy writing Flandre x Koishi though! They're so cute, in my opinion.
Thanks for reading!