Hi,

So, this is my first story- it's been written for a while, haven't had a chance to finish and publish until now. It's a rewrite of the horrible ending for MerDer we were given at the end of season 10 and will NOT, not ever contain the unspeakable horrors of the end of season 11. I tried to add a little drama, sorry if it's mostly fluff. It's a fix it story. If you don't like it, don't leave nasty reviews, not all fics are for everyone. If you like it, let me know if I should write more- I have ideas to redo season 11 lol. Sorry for any bad grammar, I tried to catch everything. Merder story completely!

...

"I am staying HERE!" Meredith shouts. She glares at her husband. Both of them out of breath from all the yelling. Her and Derek had been fighting for almost two hours about moving to D.C.

Finally, after what seems like ages Derek sighs, "Meredith, let's just go to sleep- We can't keep fighting… I know I'll just say something I'll regret."

Meredith considers him for a second, she's exhausted, "fine, get your pillow, you're sleeping on the couch".

" Mer, please just understand what I'm saying- it's such a amazing opportunity…"

"Enough, Derek! I'm done talking about this tonight" He then turns to go into their room to get a pillow and a blanket while she checks on the kids.

Derek lays on the couch trying to fall asleep, he misses her snoring and the smell of her lavender conditioner, even though she's in the next room. "Why doesn't she get it? This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for me" he asks himself. He falls into a restless sleep trying to figure out how to convince his wife to move to D.C with him.

Meanwhile, Meredith was just as restless. Even though she's pissed at Derek, she has a hard time sleeping without him. She tries to figure out how to tell Derek that she just wants to shine as well and get him to understand that. She has worked so hard for years, she wants a chance to be known. Not for her mother or her husband, but for her, Meredith Grey.

The next morning, neither of them spoke unless it was about the kids or to the kids. During breakfast, Derek got paged to the hospital, leaving Meredith to bring Zola and Bailey to daycare. Once Derek got to the ER he knew he was in for a long day. "What happened?" he asked Owen as he looked around the chaotic E.R. Almost every bed was filled with patients and an ambulance could be heard coming closer to the bay.

"52 year old female, involved in a 4 car pileup on the highway, presents with depressed skull fracture",started Owen. "She has been having blood pressure issues and seizures en route to the hospital".

"Ok, her pupils are blown, we need to get her to an O.R now!" Derek says. "Call up and have O.R 1 prepped" he instructs as he passes the nurses station.

The surgery was rough, she coded twice and Derek was just placing her chart at the end of her bed when a man ran into the room, right to the patient's bedside.

"Oh my god! Jenny!" The man exclaimed. He looked frazzled, as if his whole world was crumbling.

"Excuse me sir, are you her husband?" Derek asked.

"Yes, I'm sorry, I got here as fast as I could. I've been working in Arizona for the past 8 months at a new job while she stayed In Seattle. We haven't spoken much-we've both been busy I guess. Are you her doctor?"

Derek gave the man a small smile as he finished his ramble, it reminded him of his wife. "Yes, I'm Dr. Shepherd. I'm sorry, but your wife sustained massive injuries in the crash- we had to perform surgery. She's stable for now, hopefully she will wake up soon."

Derek left the man to sit by his wife and noticed how devastated he looked. While walking away from the nurses station,he couldn't help but notice the similarities between the situation between him and Meredith and his patient and her husband. "That won't be Meredith and I" he thought. But before he could think much further, Bailey walked up next to him and slammed a chart down on the counter.

"Shepherd!" She snapped. "Would you kindly care to explain to me WHY I just got out of a surgery with your wife who, again, was giving me more details of the two of y'all's drama than I need to know about how you being a brainless brain man again?"

"Oh, she is upset because I want to move to D.C to continue the Brain Mapping initiative with the President. She said she would go, but now she says she doesn't want to move. I don't know what changed!" Derek replied.

Bailey sighed,"you fool! That girl has bent over backwards trying to be a brilliant surgeon, wife and mother. Right now she's seeing her friends, her peers and her husband getting ahead and she isn't. Meredith is trying to stand out and grow and be seen as the wonderful surgeon, mother and wife that you and I know! She deserves a chance to shine. Now, she has been making a name in the business here in Seattle. She changed her mind because she realized that she needs to do something for her, no one else."

Derek thought before responding. "Mer did mention something last night about her always being seen as "the intern who fell for the attending." I hope she doesn't really see that."

"Pssh! Derek, just go home and talk to your wife. Your problems better not affect my O.R again, ya hear me!"

Derek laughs, "I will talk to her, Miranda".

"Damn right, you will! Also, another thing, don't you remember when you went back to Addison? You looked like a lost, lovesick puppy without Grey, and you saw her everyday. I wouldn't want to imagine how lost you would be if you went across the country without her or those babies,, so don't even think of suggesting going apart either." With that, she left Derek to think about their conversation.

As soon as Dr. Bailey walked off, Derek's pager blared, one of his post op's needed to go back to surgery. He knew the surgery would take hours, so he texted Meredith saying he was going into surgery and will be done late. As Derek was rushing to the patients' room, Bailey's words rang in his head. He did remember that awful time when he chose Addison over Meredith. Not one of his finest choices. Meredith makes him see things clearly, she's his rock, she doesn't freeze in a crisis. It's part of what he loves about her, he can't live without out his Meredith. He decides then that he has to fix this, he hadn't been thinking of her during the recent developments of this project. Derek began to realize that he let the glamour of the brain mapping initiative get in the way of his family.

Meredith's phone vibrated with the text Derek sent about surgery. As she reads it she feels relieved, after rehashing their fight to Bailey, she doesn't feel like going home and fighting some more. So, she finishes up her charts and before long it's time to go get Zola and Bailey and go home.

The three of them drive through the dark streets to the dream house and before long they are home. Meredith gives the kids a quick dinner since its late and puts them to bed. She then turns out the lights, except for the porch, and gets into bed. As she's laying there, she sees the Post-it. Their second vow catches her eye. "No running, no one walks out, no matter what happens." Derek's voice rings in her head from that wonderful day they got married. She makes a note to bring that up to him, neither of them can run, that would definitely be breaking a vow, something she knows neither want to happen. She is exhausted, so Meredith turns over and falls asleep.

Derek is now pulling up to his dream house and seeing only the porch lights on, he hopes that maybe Meredith is still awake. He walks inside and grabs a drink. After a few minutes he walks into their room and sees Mer curled up under the covers, despite their fight, he can't resist, he goes and gives her a kiss on the cheek. She stirs a little and opens her eyes and sees Derek standing there.

"Oh, you're awake" he says.

Meredith groans, " I was asleep…"

"Oh, I'm sorry, go back to sleep, you just looked so beautiful, I couldn't help but kiss you" he said.

"Derek, stop trying to charm me, I'm still mad at you, go sleep on the couch, I don't want to talk now!" As he turns, dejected, to go sleep on the couch, Meredith turns to the other side of the bed and tries to go back to sleep.

After a while of tossing and turning, Meredith decides to give up on getting back to sleep and go get something to drink from the kitchen. As she's sitting there with her glass of water, she watches Derek sleep. He is particularly adorable when he sleeps, though she probably wouldn't admit that to him. Derek, lays on his back with his hand over his chest, head to the side. She giggles because it's the same way Bailey sleeps. Looking down, she sees that her glass is empty. Standing, she puts the glass in the sink and as she turns to go back to their room. All of a sudden, she hears Derek start moaning, she looks over and she sees him tossing and turning. Then, he starts screaming, almost like he's begging.

"NO! NO! Not Meredith! Wake up Mer! I love you! She's not dead. No!

At this point, Meredith rushes over to the couch and runs her fingers through his hair, "Derek…Derek, wake up!" He calms down a little but is still breathing heavy as his eyes open and blue meets green. Meredith can't help but notice the moisture in his eyes and on his cheeks and the fact that he is as white as a sheet.

"It's ok, it was just a dream." She says, while running her hands through his hair, trying to calm him.

"More like a nightmare" says Derek as he sits up on the couch.

"What happened, Derek?"

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. " I had a dream where I went to D.C alone and one day I got a call from Owen saying that you were in an accident and about to go into surgery, but by the time I got to the hospital, Owen came out and told me that you…you didn't make it through the surgery. Then, I just kept picturing the day you drowned and how lost and defeated I felt and… I…I…"

"Hey, I'm right here Derek" says Meredith as she puts her arms around him, rubs his shoulders and kisses him on the cheek.

Derek wraps his arms around her waist and takes a deep breath. Both of them forgetting their fight, they need each other right now. "I love you Mer, I can't loose you."

"I love you too Derek, you're not loosing me, no matter what. Remember the post-it, "no running!" she says, smiling.

They sit for a while in each others arms, thinking and just enjoying holding one another. After a few minutes, Derek looks up at her, deep into her eyes and gives his McDreamy smile. In that moment, he realizes that he knows what to do, months ago he made a promise to take more of the parenting load and step back a bit from work so Meredith could shine and he was going to keep that promise. So he starts saying , "Meredith, I thought D.C was everything, but I was wrong, you…you are everything. I can't go to D.C without you, I'm not myself when I'm without you. Please, don't avoid, tell me what's going on in that head of yours."

Meredith was stunned by his beautiful words, she noticed the tears in his eyes and realized that his nightmare really shook him. Brushing aside memories of her drowning and an upset Derek, she says, "Derek, I am standing by what I said, I am staying here. I have established myself in this hospital. I don't want to just follow people to a new place or just go where I have to earn my place like I'm an intern. I want to develop into my own kick ass general surgeon, I want people to WANT me for me, not because I'm with or know someone who is well 's what would happen if I just up and went to a hospital out there."

"Oh, Mere, you know that you are an amazing surgeon! Better than your mother."

"I know I am, Derek, but you, Callie, Bailey all had the chance to publish and put your names out in the field so that people know how great you all are without being associated with someone famous. I have barely published anything, I mean Cristina is going to run a hospital! Burke basically came out of hiding to select her to run his and I've barely had the chance to build my name. When people hear my name and my specialty, they associate it with my mother." Meredith bit her lip, "and I want to be a better wife and mother at the same time," ending her ramble.

Derek was shocked, he knew his wife was a kick-ass surgeon, wonderful wife and excellent mom- heck, he couldn't even get Zola to put her shoes on, but Mer could every single time. "Meredith, you ARE already wonderful at all those things and we are going to find the right research or an innovative way to grow a kidney or something to get you out there and show people that you are a great surgeon." He gives her his signature smile for the next part,"with the kids, they adore you. Zola constantly talks about your princess tea parties and Bailey gets the biggest smile when he hears your name, they love you no matter how late you work. And, you know I love you, you are the greatest wife ever! You keep me in line, do not ever think otherwise about any of those things! Don't worry about D.C, Mer, I can't live without you, I am going to resign tomo…"

"No!" Meredith says, interrupting him, "you can't give give up your dream, Derek, you've been so excited about this, for weeks."

"Hey, shhhh….!" He says, silencing his wife, looking into her green eyes, "I may have been an ass the other night and I'm so sorry. I put my needs and wants before my family's. I have had my chance to shine, it's yours now. I made a promise to you that I'd take a step back, I should have kept it, like I said before, I let all the glamour of the project get to me, and I'm just asking for another chance, please Mer? I don't want to miss you taking the world by storm or Zola's first day at school or Bails finally saying "daddy" whether we were to all go to D.C or just myself.

Meredith giggles at that last part, they had been trying to get Bailey to say "daddy" for a while now, with no luck. "Derek, you would see us though if we were all in D.C."

"No, Mer, I'm not so sure now, the hours and deadlines they sent over today were crazy! Between working in the lab, getting everything done on time plus you working, I don't see how I'd be home for very long. It doesn't matter though, I'm not going."

"But, I don't want you to resent me or the kids for letting go of this project."

As soon as she finishes talking, Derek softly kisses her before looking at her, shaking his head a bit, "oh, Mer, I could never resent you or the kids, I made this decision myself. Well, Dr. Bailey yelled at me today, telling me what a fool I was, that influenced me to rethink things as well." He kisses her again, passionately on the lips and when he pulls away he gives a short "peck" on each cheek and one on the nose as he says " .you", that will never change."

Meredith looks at her husband, considering his words. "We can do this?"

"Yes… We can do this Meredith. Extraordinary together, right?

Meredith smiles at the memory that Derek just mentioned."Yes" she replies. "You know Derek, the kids are asleep and we just made up." Derek nods, beginning to understand his wife's hints. Meredith finishes, "You have to make up for being a McAss with a lot of sex!"

"Yes, dear!" Derek says with a laugh as he scoops his wife up in his arms. " I am going to do everything in my power to prove how sorry I am for the rest of my life!"

Derek carries Meredith quickly into their bedroom, placing her on their bed. He kisses her passionately as she pulls him closer. They cherish each kiss, taking their time loving each other. After multiple rounds, Derek holds Meredith tight to him as he buries his nose in her neck. Meredith runs her hands over his chest and through his hair as she whispers "I love you, Derek". Derek kisses her neck and repeats the same words. They drift off to sleep content and sated.