I had heard people say 'this trip changed my life' more times than I could count and everytime I thought well what was your life like before. Don't get me wrong we can all appreciate a good story in the little backwoods town of Bon Temps that I grew up in. Nothing ever really happens and it doesn't seem to bother anyone until someone comes back from somewhere (sometimes as far as just two towns over) and suddenly everyone's thoughts go to their story or they start thinking about why they don't have a story.
I had enough of a story even if it was a bit of a sob story.
At the sweet age of five I lost my parents and older brother in a flood when they were travelling to take my brother to a football camp. We weren't the wealthiest of families by far and my parents had scrimped and saved so that he could go. I was supposed to go with them but had begged to stay at my Gran's house instead. My little disability meant that being in large crowds like I was going to be once we reached the camp was going to be pretty much unbearable before you tacked on the hours of driving that would have worn me down. I had said goodbye and then trotted off to help my Gran in the kitchen with a smile on my face. A few hours later and that smile didn't return for years. Even now I would catch a stray thought here or there about how it was so tragic for me and Gran to be left alone like that. Gran would get smiles of sympathy for her losses whilst in their heads they pitied her for being lumbered with me, Crazy Sookie, the defective child.
Only a few years later after fighting hard Gran lost her other child, my Aunt Linda, to cancer and my barely teenage cousin Hadley took off to parts unknown with a boy from a town over. Gran got the same looks and I caught the same stray thoughts all over again.
So we were alone and that was OK cos we had eachother.
Times were hard for Gran and me. She had retired when she started looking after me and as much as renting my parents house out lifted a little bit of a burden money only ever stretched so far but Gran never left us wanting. Be that as it may I started working the moment I could. I mowed lawns and did grocery shopping for some of the older ones in town for a few coins a piece and when I was old enough I would babysit for the youngsters in town. When the local bar was sold to a new guy in town I managed to get a job busing tables after school which moved to hostess and then an actual waitress as I got older.
I didn't do too well in school. It's hard to concentrate on what the teacher is saying when you can read the minds of your classmates and everyone is thinking about everything but the work they are supposed to be doing. School was always difficult but I did well enough all things considered to pass all my tests. It meant that when the lovely old lady that ran the local library retired I stepped in to replace her. Working days at the library and weekends and evenings at the bar meant more money but bills and taxes soon started creeping up and has Gran got older medical bills stacked up on the top of that. I had no choice but to get another job. So I spent my days Monday through to Saturday at the library and Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday evening working at the local Walmart and Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday evening working at the local bar leaving me Sunday days for church and catching up on things around the house and the garden. As mobile as Gran was there were some things that she just couldn't do.
Gran helped where she could. She had sold some of our land when I was younger, as much as she could anyways. Everything in my parent's house that wasn't a piece of much needed furniture was sold. We took bits and pieces more sentimental than anything but with everything else if it could be sold it was, what couldn't was donated.
She made the occasional thing here and there. She sold her quilts twice a year at the local fayre and she sold her preserves. Anything she didn't sell went in the stock pile. With the wild fruits that grew in the woods around our home there was never a shortage. There was a short time where she and I ate nothing but toast and preserves til we got back on track again.
She baked and traded with others within her clubs. More times than I could count she would head out for the afternoon with Maxine Fortenberry (the town's biggest gossip) with a bunch of fruit pies and come home with casseroles and pasta dishes.
Most people in our town just got by and whilst most would offer anything they could most had too much pride to ask. There was nothing wrong with a bit of trade though not in my Gran's books and since her apple pie was the best in the Parish they were rarely brought back home again.
The one thing that Gran did the most was babysit. She told me having the young around knocked 10 years off her. She charged but never really much. It was usually a little bit of food or a couple of dollars. As soon as the kids were gone she would put it in the trinket box on the mantle. At the end of every month she would send me into town to take it all to the bank. The bank teller hated me.
I never took from Gran and I never let her or the house go without. I was the master at remaking clothes. Jeans to shorts or skirts, dresses to skirts or tops. When clothing became too threadbare to be used as anything wearable it was cut up and used as cleaning rags. We wasted very little. We couldn't afford to really waste anything.
Life was hard and there were a few winters we didn't have the wood to burn to keep the chill out of the house at night. I was barely ten the second time and still too young to be swinging an axe to take down the trees around us and then splitting them. I slept in Gran's bed every night that winter, the two of us huddled under the blankets. Louisiana never gets the bitter cold of the northern states but its cold enough at night to give you more than a chill.
From the moment I started working I put a little money away. It was never much just a dollar here and there. It became a little more as I gained more jobs and a little more still when those jobs ended up higher paying or when I had a good night of tips. It all went in this little box in my underwear drawer.
At first I was saving so that I didn't have to work so many jobs. If I could have dropped the supermarket job I would have been eternally glad (even though I would have missed out on a lot of the discounted food) but then my two best friends came up with a wild idea. We had never gone beyond the Parish borders and we were tired of listening to everyone else's stories. We wanted our own. One Sunday while they sat in the sunshine and I mowed the yard we made a list of cities. It had to be a city that we went to. Coming from a small town we wanted a different feel. There were a few beaches thrown in for variety but it was a city we really wanted. Some of them were crazy like New York or San Francisco and LA which we knew if we picked we'd be on zimmer frames by the time we could save enough but there were some sensibile ones too. We chose with a pin. The pin said Dallas so Dallas was where we saved to go. We were sixteen and still in school but ready to take on the world.
Five years after that afternoon was when my two best friends Tara and Lafayette had the money for us to go. I was short over two hundred and fifty dollars. We had planned to fly and stay in a good hotel and to have money to shop and to go to clubs and to eat out almost everyday. They had scrimped every penny they could and had actually done it. I on the other hand would have done it except my car broke down and a simple repair costing less than a hundred turned into three times that and then a week later the washing machine broke down and needed repairing. The repair job on that was higher than buying new so I had to go into my savings twice in less than a month. A few months later a bad storm put a hole in the roof and it cleared me out. I had to start over and so I hadn't bought anything I didn't desperately need for over 3 years. I had darned and rehemmed my clothes til there was practically nothing left of them. Knowing it would take me at least another year to put the money together barring any further complications I told my friends to go without me but to have fun for me.
My friends being my friends changed the plans.
We downgraded the hotel we were staying in and drove instead of flying. It wasn't the luxury break we had planned for all those years but it meant we were going and we were going together.
The day we were leaving followed one of the worst nights in my history at Merlottes. News of lay offs at the nearby working plant sent many people into the bar to do the only thing they could do, drown their sorrows. It took til three in the morning for the last drunk as a skunk worker to stumble out to their ride home. When I fell into my bed it was quarter past. When the high pitched beep beep beep of my alarm woke me it was a little after six. I was bone tired but as I climbed out of bed and stretched up towards the ceiling I knew today was the day.
Today was my very last day before we left.
Today was the day I left Bon Temps for the first time.
Today was the day my very first vacation began.
Heading to my bathroom I did my business and took a shower to get the bar smell off me. By the time I headed downstairs I was feeling more myself, smiles and all.
"Good Morning Gran."
"Good Morning Sookie. I didn't hear you get in last night. Was everything alright?" I smiled at Gran's back. She was huddled around the stove cooking what smelled like bacon and eggs. She tried her best to stay awake for when I got home so late but I knew it was getting harder for her.
"A bunch of workers were in. They're laying people off at the plant. Not sure how many just yet but there was an awful lot in last night."
"Did everyone leave alright?"
"That's why we were so late leaving. It took a while to get everyone a safe ride home. Sam took a few himself in his truck." Sam was my boss at Merlottes. He was the nicest guy around these parts and the easiest one for me to be around. My little disability meant being around people for long periods of time would leave me with screaming headaches. The drunker they got the louder their thoughts became. I barely got anything from Sam. It was quite relaxing by comparison.
"Was he there to lock up?"
"Yes. He walked me to my car just like usual too. He is very conscious about our safety at night."
"That's because he is sweet on you."
"Gran!"
"It's true Sookie dear. That boy had his eye on you since before you turned eighteen. It's a good job he has always been a gentleman or I would have had him pick his switch." She may have mumbled that last part but I still heard her. Sam was my friend, that's all.
Gran brought over the plate of bacon and egss and a stack of toast that looks like it could feed a family. I give her an incredulous look.
"Don't look at me like that Sookie. I know you have been skipping meals to save for your trip." I look away for a second but it is more than enough for Gran. "Sookie I am happy you are going on this trip." Her hand wraps around mine forcing me to look at her again. "You have worked so hard for so long Sookie. You need to stop and do something for yourself. Go have fun and come back with a mountain of stories to tell me." I smile not really knowing what to say. Gran had never really said anything about our trip. I'd always thought that she expected it to just be a dream, something to hold onto. There were times like when my savings had to be spent that I believed I would spend the rest of my days saving up for a trip I'd never take.
"Now eat up before it gets cold. You have a long day at the library and the bar and then that long drive. You need to keep your strength up. Why you decided to leave then I'll never know."
Whilst Sam happily gave me the time off (the other waitresses would be more than happy at a chance at more weekend tips) and the supermarket didn't mind giving me the single day off I needed from them the library was a different kettle of fish. I was the only member of staff at the library which meant if I wasn't there it didn't open. There wasn't the money to hire anyone else to work there. I managed to swing the Saturday and the Friday after much pleading and begging. The Monday took a little bit of underhanded guilt tripping since I had worked several hours unpaid for two months because of the local high school. It did mean however that all three of us would be working a full shift today before climbing into our cars and beginning the three and a half hour trek. We fully intended on being in Dallas for breakfast Friday morning. We weren't going to waste a second we didn't have to.
My time in the library seemed to fly by. It was the last chance before my weekend off so there were plenty of people coming through the door swapping over their books for the weekend. There were a few looks from some of the older customers obviously upset at me for changing their routines. Mrs Gentry even told me I was being positively rude with my selfishness. Then she went on at me about how about the only time she had ever left Bon Temps was on her honeymoon and she hated every single second in New Orleans.
I had to bite my tongue to say that was her not me. I'd never know if I liked it outside of this town if I didn't leave it at least once.
By the time she had left I was partly mortified she had berated me at work with three other women behind her but the other part, the secret part of me, wanted to leave right then and there. That little part had always whispered to me that I should just pack up and leave and find something exciting, something that wasn't this quiet little town. I always shushed it, pushed it down deep. I wasn't afraid to leave I just didn't want to leave the only family I still had left and Gran would never leave that farmhouse.
As the day wound on I returned to my day of putting away books, checking through books that were late and requesting book loans from the Shreveport Library. We didn't have the largest library or the most impressive. Every book that was ours had been read at least a thousand times and other than the requisite children's books, the study aids for the high school and books on the Civil War (people were still very enthusiastic about it round these parts, there were even clubs) the other permanent fixtures were the bodice ripper romances. Every one was well loved and on constant rotation with the over fifty crowd. And me. Most of the new books we had, best sellers and cook books and the like were loaned to us from Shreveport on a monthly basis. All the loaned books were kept on a special stand beside my desk. I gave them and every other shelf a good polish every day and pulled all the books to the front of the shelves.
At four thirty I locked the door to the library and jumped into my car heading in the opposite direction to home for my shift at Merlottes. Merlottes was a nice bar and grill, a lot nicer than some of the others in the area. Most of them leaned more towards dive than anything else. It was a simple place filled with booths and tables and a pool table that was always popular on Friday and Saturdays as all the singles flirted it up.
Walking through the front door I waved to Tara who was behind the bar giving the resident drunk Jane Bodehouse a look. I knew that look. Jane had opened her drunken trap again.
My eyes scanned the tables quickly as I walked through glad that the tables weren't too full. I partly wanted them to stay that way so that none of us were too exhausted on our drive out to Dallas but if it got busier tips would be better and I would have more money to spend whilst in Dallas. I wasn't a flashy girl by any means and never had any cash to flaunt but a new dress would be pretty nice all things considered.
I'd almost made it passed the kitchen doorway when I heard Lafayette call out to me.
"Hey Sook!" I stuck my head around the door. "You ready to get your freak on up in Dallasssssssssss!" I laughed at him shaking his butt around as he spoke. He was dancing around the kitchen waving his spatula around, the tassle ends of his purple headscarf waving around as he moved. He looked as flamboyant as ever and it made me smile even bigger to see him so free and so happy.
Terry bless his soul was stood in the corner giving him a wide eyed look. Even after all these years cooking at his side Terry still had moments where he looked overwhelmed by Lafayette's wild nature.
"I most certainly am. How you doing Terry?" His face softened a little as he turned to face me. For all his troubles and the PTSD and all Terry was a good guy. He and I had a lot in common when it came down to the folks of Bon Temps. Though we were different in the head we were both judged as defective, broken, by the town. On some occasions when the PTSD got the better of him it was painful to be around him. Every thought and emotion seemed to triple in strength and it would hit me like a hammer, shields or no shields.
"I'm doing good today Sookie. How about you?" His kind nature always makes me smile. How someone could stay so kind despite everything they had seen was amazing.
"I'm doing good now Terry thankyou. I'll see you guys in a lil bit."
Turning I headed towards the office where each of us had a little cubby to keep our things in. Sadly Sam was in there on the phone with someone so I had to grab my uniform and change in the ladies. It wasn't the best scenario and I banged my elbow on the door pulling the white tshirt over my head but at least it was private. With my shorts and tshirt in place I checked myself over in the mirror. Pulling my ponytail a little tighter I flattened down a few stray hairs and left.
Stopping quickly in the office to drop off my library clothes into my over sized bag I left quietly with my waitressing things. With my apron on and pad in hand I take a deep breath checked my mental shields and step out into the dining room. Time to put my game face on.
As the hours dragged on and the bar filled up more and more Tara got crabbier with everyone, serving drinks with more attitude than she usually would. Sam was up and behind the bar by ten helping Tara, his strawberry blonde hair becoming more mussed as he ran his hands through it more and more as the crowds just never went away. Lafayette whilst still his fantabulous self was bouncing from order to order almost as fast as I was running from table to bar to serving window. As fast as I took an order I was serving the drinks to the table before last and then getting food for the one before that. My smile had gone from polite to crazy to edging on demented by the time midnight rolled around, something it seemed had been passed over by everyone in the bar.
Most of the patrons were again from the plant with many more of the town coming in to commiserate with them. From the sounds of it a third of the staff would be leaving within the month. Sam looked less than happy at that as did the rest of us. Less money in the community meant less money for local businesses which meant more lay offs. It was a vicious circle. I for one definitely couldn't afford to lose a single one of my jobs.
If I'd had anyone else working with me but Arlene the night would have been a lot worse. She was a veteran waitress, although heaven knows what would happen if you said that to her face, so although the pair of us were clearly overwhelmed being down a waitress (Dawn just didn't show) we managed just fine. Nothing was dropped and as fast as drinks hit trays or food came up on the window it was served. Nether of us stuck to our sections opting to pitch in on the other's if we needed to.
By midnight the kitchen was closed and cleaned but the bar still had a few patrons left. Sam took over the bar sending both Lafayette and Tara off into the night. They both promised to meet me at home at the end of my shift. I was planning on leaving my car for Gran whilst I was away just in case she needed it. Lafayette had a convertible so it was the obvious choice for our trip. It was more extravagant than anything anyone else drove in Bon Temps even if was a fair few years old.
With the night winding down it was easier for Arlene and I to keep to our sections, cleaning up the empty tables and booths when we got a quiet moment. Jane was propping up the bar like she did almost every night spinning some tale or other about her deceased husband. The stories she told were always crazy and you had to take them with a pinch of salt. She and her husband were like a bad country song either loving eachother hard or trying to kill eachother. I guess that was why she spent every night since his death in here lost in her memories with the aid of a bottle of Jack.
Dropping my mental shields I used my disability to get a read on those who were left. Most were gearing up to move, others dawdling over their drink trying to delay the inevitable and then there were a few like Jane who were more propping up the bar waiting for another drink than showing the willingness to locate the door. In all honesty I believe the only reason Jane goes home is because we close.
By one thirty the tables were clear. There were only a handful left sitting at the bar and even they were waiting on rides home. After a sweep around and a quick check that we hadn't missed anything in the booths Arlene and I split the tips evenly between us. We had both helped out the other tonight so it was only fair.
"Well we've definitely had a good night," Arlene exclaimed slipping her money into her purse.
"They worked us hard tonight though." I said slipping my own money out of sight.
"Yeah," Arlene yawned "but at least they tipped us. This will pay for the present I got put aside for Lisa's birthday and buy us some groceries." She stood up from her seat straightening out her shorts as she moved. "I guess that will come in handy for you on your trip. Will get you something sexy to wear for a night out or something." I smiled rising from my own seat as she shimmied her butt around. I waved to Jane's son who had come to usher her off home. He lifted his hand in greeting before gripping his mamma's arm as she stumbled. He deserved a sainthood. That man had been called out almost every night for the passed few years to take her home.
As the last person headed through the door I threw the lock and pulled both bolts before giving the dining room and bar one last once over. Nobody could ever claim I was lax in my duties. With just the small lights behind the bar illuminating the space it should have been hard for Arlene and I to make our way to the office but we were well practiced in seeing in the dark. With ease we made it to the back, Sam following us through with the nights takings bagged and ready for the safe. Tomorrow was bank day and also pay day. Sam had gracious allowed me mine the day before so I could cash it and pay a few bills before I left. The little bit that was left over I had given to Gran. The grocery store and the library both paid me on Fridays aswell but I managed to get my library pay check today to give to Gran since I wouldn't be there tomorrow and Saturday. The grocery store I would have to wait until I came back. Hopefully the money we already had would pay for any bills before I could cash it.
I slipped my tips into the side pocket of my oversized bag and fished around for my car keys. They never stayed where I had put them and even with the small light on in the office I could never see them. With a triumphant 'aha' I pulled them free of my bag catching one of the housekeys on my hair brush. I was almost across the threshold when Sam called me back.
"Hey Sookie." I smiled waiting for him to say what he needed to but he wrapped his arms around me instead. "You have fun and stay safe OK. I wanna hear all your stories when you get back." I wrapped my own cluttered arms around him holding a little tighter when he squeezed me tight.
"I will Sam. Don't worry I'll be back before you know it." Smells so good. I kept on smiling as I pulled back even as I heard him. Maybe Gran was right.
I left through the back door heading to my beat up old car. As I unlocked the door I waved goodbye to Arlene as she slowly drove passed me. Climbing into the car I spotted Sam stood in the open doorway the yellow light casting an eery colouring over him. He raised his hand to me as I started my car thankfully on the first try. I lifted the fingers on one hand keeping the thumb tucked against the steering wheel as I slowly backed out of my parking space.
By the time I pulled up behind the house I was feeling every one of the hours I had worked. My feet were sore and my back ached and I didn't think my limbs could feel as heavy as they did right now. I had around an hour before Lafayette and Tara arrived. My duffle bag was sitting beside the front door so all I had to do was drag it out once they got here. With that in mind I pulled out all the essentails from my bag and put them in the small handbag I was taking with me. It was the nicest bag that I had and was a gift from the Merlottes girls for my birthday last year. There was a small clutch in my bag for nights out but this one would do fine for during the day whilst we were out and about. I pulled out my paycheck from the library and tucked it under the phone in the kitchen. Gran knew it would be there but would see it as soon as she walked in the room anyways.
With that job done I crept up the stairs artfully dodging the creaks on the third and fifth steps. Once in my room I turned on the lamp before pulling out a tshirt and some shorts to change into. They weren't the shortest pair of shorts I owned sitting just above my knees but like all my shorts they had once been a pair of jeans that just kept getting cropped shorter and shorter.
I had no intention of sitting in that car smelling like grease and old beer for the whole drive so I took the hottest shower I could stand trying to keep it quick and trying to keep it quiet. Gran may have eluded a time or two that she wanted to wave us off but she needed to sleep and if I could keep her asleep I would.
With pink skin I towelled off and slipped into clean underwear and then my clean clothes keeping an ear (and my mind) on the drive out front. The hot water seemed to have loosened me up a bit and worked away some of the aches. I didn't want to use my hair dryer on my hair because of Gran so I resorted to towelling it off a few extra times before sticking it in a loose bun. I had a hat in my bag that we used to wear at Merlottes in the summer and that would keep any chill off me if we kept the roof down. It wouldn't be the greatest fashion accesory but it would serve its purpose.
With no sign of the others I picked up my uniforms and my towels and quietly took them to the laundry room downstairs. Checking the back door was locked (even out here in the middle of no where you can never be too careful) I grabbed a banana and an apple and headed to the front door. Picking up my bags I headed out the front door locking it behind me before I took a seat on the porch swing.
It was a peaceful night filled with all the bugs and critters. There was no breeze but the warmth wasn't too oppressive for this time of year. I sat back eating first my banana and then my apple staring at the star filled sky. After my parents and brother died Gran told me they had been taken up to heaven. I would look out of my window at night staring at the stars wondering which one was them.
I smile at my childhood thoughts before turning my head to the slowly moving convertible. The worn thin gravel barely made a sound as the tires slowly ran over it. Lifting my bags from where they sat at my feet I smiled at my two friends grateful they were as quiet as they were in respect for my Gran. Everyone loved my Gran but these two were always family. With Tara's alcoholic mother and Lafayette being shunned by pretty much everyone because he never hid his sexuality they had spent a lot of time here with Gran. As kids they had helped with chores around the house and neither ever balked when it was something basic for dinner. Tara especially was happy with anything, it being cooked was just icing on the cake.
"Hey," Tara whisper yelled as she opened up the trunk. "You ready?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I am."
"Sook you get in back, get some shut eye. Tara and me are good. We got a nap before we came for you and you worked a hell of a lot more hours today that we did." Laf was much more subdued that usual whether that was because he didn't want to be too loud because of Gran or if he was just that tired I wasn't sure.
"You sure. I don't mind keeping you company."
"We all good. Tara can take over if I get too tired. It's only a few hours and then we can get us some food." I climbed into the back seat smiling to him in the rear view mirror in thanks before settling my head against the door.
With our limited duffle bags in the boot of the car and a silent goodbye from each of us to the woman inside the rickety old farmhouse we set off down the road into inky blackness, towards our few days of freedom.