A/N1: Here it is, the Series Finale! I know, I can't believe it myself! My goal is to be finished by New Year's Eve, if editing goes well.

A/N2: You'll notice the number of chapters is higher than the other episodes. Don't get too excited; I originally intended for this episode to be twice as long any of the others (words wise), but the story didn't cooperate. :( I've decided, though, that the story beats work better if they're separated out in more chapters, so I'm spreading the story out over nine chapters. Chapter 10 will be Author's Notes.

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Previously on Jaime Lannister Investigations:

…Bronna hands them each an envelope.

"Just arrived," she says. "Hand-delivered. Pia says hello, by the way, and you should call them for dinner sometime."

Jaime and Brienne frown at the rich gold and blue envelopes, turning them over in their hands before opening them.

Inside is an ornate invitation, inviting them to a re-opening of the exhibition of King Jaime I Lannister and Queen Brienne I of Tarth six weeks from that day. The invitation promises new artifacts and new discoveries that will rewrite history. Jaime's eyes pop wide.

"Sponsored by King Duncan himself!" Jaime says.

"And he and the Queen are going to be in attendance!" Bronna says with a grin and waves her own envelope. "I'm not about to miss that!"

"Tyrion will love it," Jaime says.

"He'll go and love it, even if he doesn't," Bronna sniffs, and Jaime laughs.

His phone rings and he looks at it.

"Speak of the devil," he says and answers it. "Tyrion, we were just talking about you."

"Glowingly, of course."

"Naturally."

"Well, this is going to make you practically worship at my feet: I have a lead on the sword hilt, and mayhaps the dragon bone as well."

Teaser

"A lead?" Jaime says, feeling more surprised than he probably should. Then again, so much has happened in the last few weeks and months, the still-missing magical artifacts have all but slipped his mind.

Brienne and Bronna frown at him.

"The sword hilt," he tells them.

Brienne's eyes widen and Bronna picks up the phone and calls for Sam.

Jaime says to Tyrion, "We're going into the boardroom and I'm going to put you on speaker phone."

"Does this mean I'll need to behave?" Tyrion pouts.

"Would you, even if it did?"

"Jaime, please!"

"That's what I thought."

Sam comes huffing into the boardroom as Jaime switches to speaker phone and says, "We're all here. What's the lead?"

"There's a big Magicon in—"

"A what?" Brienne says.

"Magicon," Bronna says. "It's a five-day conference for magic practitioners as well as people who may not practice but do believe magic is real." She shrugs. "I've learned a lot since I've been on the House of the Undying's boards."

Brienne stares at her in disbelief.

"Yes," Tyrion says, "well, I have it on fairly good authority that the sword hilt is going to be at this Magicon, and mayhaps the dragon bone as well."

"Who's the good authority?" Brienne asks.

Tyrion laughs. "You know better than that, Brienne! Besides, Jaime knows who it is, too, if he'll just think about it for a moment."

Jaime scowls then his face clears. "Ah."

"Ah, indeed. Anyway, the event is in Asshai, and starts ten days from now. According to the website, it's already sold out, but I'm sure Sam will be able to find a way to get tickets."

*/*/*/*/*

"Magicon in Asshai," Jaime murmurs and shakes his head.

"I suppose we should have expected this," Bronna says with a frown. "The boards have been humming with nothing but talk about this event, and rumors have been rampant for weeks about huge surprises in store for the attendees. Everyone's expecting to see irrefutable evidence that Bran the Sleeper is on the verge of waking."

"What kind of irrefutable evidence could there possibly be?" Jaime asks.

Sam's expression changes. "Son-of-a-bitch," he mutters, and bolts from the boardroom.

The others exchange surprised looks then hurry after him. They find him in his office, tapping frantically on his keyboard.

"What's going on?" Brienne says.

"The dragon eggs!" Sam says as a map of Essos appears with thin lines snaking over it. He taps the screen. "They're heading to Asshai."

*/*/*/*/*

Sam and Bronna reach out to their contacts on the message boards to see whether they can get tickets while Jaime and Brienne begin making arrangements to go to Asshai.

"Listen," Bronna says without preamble when they meet to brief Jaime and Brienne the next day, "Sam and I are the ones who have to go to this thing."

Brienne and Jaime exchange a glance then frown at their friends.

"Really," Brienne says, her voice flat. "Last time I checked, I'm the detective in this group."

Bronna rolls her eyes and waves Brienne's words away. "Yes, yes, I know, but this isn't…Sam, tell them."

"We've scored tickets," Sam says, "but only two. Security is also going to be insane, according to LostWolfGirl, who's a member of the organizing committee. She's assured me that you won't be able to just wander around the conference centre without being questioned at every turn."

"Besides," Bronna says, "the two of you would never go unrecognized. Do you really think whoever has the sword hilt and the dragon bone and the eggs will still talk about them if they know you're around?" She shakes her head. "That's why Sam and I are the one who need to go."

"No," Brienne says, her voice flat.

Bronna says, "It makes sense, Brienne! We've been on the message boards now for months, and while we're not part of the inner circle, we've certainly established a presence there. Everyone wants to help the newbies who are trying to learn all they can about magic and Bran the Sleeper."

"Right," Sam says, nodding. "LostWolfGirl, Explorah, OneEyedMaegi, Godswife, and Maegi have all taken us under their wings, and they've already offered to show us around the Magicon and do what they can to get us into the various sessions. You'll never be able to pretend to be us!"

Jaime hums then says, "This could be dangerous, you know. Whoever is behind all these thefts isn't going to look kindly on you poking your noses into places where they don't belong."

"We're more likely to find something out without being discovered than you are," Sam insists, "if for no other reason than because we haven't been in the news more often than not the last few months." He swallows and gives Bronna a nervous glance before he lifts his chin. "Right now, Bronna and I are the best chance you have to find the stolen artifacts."

Jaime raises an eyebrow while Brienne scowls, then he turns to her and says, "I hate to admit it, but they're right."

"Jaime!"

"We don't have time to learn enough about the group to blend in with them. They're also right that we're more likely to be recognized than they are. Our best chance to get information is to let them take the lead."

Brienne glares at him then turns to Bronna and Sam. "Fine," she growls, "I can't argue with any of that, but you are not to try and recover the artifacts, do you understand? Just listen and report back to us if you find out anything."

Bronna and Sam nod very solemnly then turn and gleefully high-five each other.

Brienne groans, closes her eyes, and pinches the bridge of her nose.

*/*/*/*/*

Three days later, Jaime asks Brienne to go for a ride with him. They're in car when Brienne asks, "Where are you taking me?"

"To the reliable authority Tyrion mentioned. I've finally convinced him to meet with both of us." Jaime's hand tightens on the steering wheel. "He's understandably reluctant to meet with just anyone."

"Who is 'he'?"

"We call him the Spider."

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