Dying and being reborn is the weirdest feeling. It didn't help that I couldn't really remember dying at all. But that didn't cause me much problems. I knew as soon as I was aware that something had changed within my existence. It also seemed that everything around me had changed. For one thing I wasn't inside my apartment. I was in what looked like the basement of someone's house. I also noticed while trying to stand up that I was a lot shorter. As in dwarf short. I was six feet one inch tall now I'm lucky if I top five feet. And I'm obese as HELL! I mean WTF, sure I had a 'dad bod', but whoever I was now was a fucking fatass. I felt like a damned beach ball. I searched around trying to find a way to identify who I was now, and finally found a wallet with an I.d. in it. It strangely enough had my name on it, but it wasn't me in the picture. It was A red haired balding dwarf. And for some ungodly reason it was niggling my memory. It probably would have driven me insane, until I got bored and turned on the laptop on the desk. When the new broadcasts popped up. The high light real had stories like. 'The Flash saves family in car accident', 'Lex Luthor wins Florida primary', and 'Teen Titans Bust H.I.V.E. school'. That last jogged my memories. I was in the body of freaking CONTROL FREAK! Oh God in heaven this was RETARDED.

1

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1

To be honest it took me quite a while to calm down from the tantrum that I was having. However, when I did calm down, I realized that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity. I could be anyone, live any life, have any power, or even assume the body of whoever I wanted. I'll be honest with you, I almost cried tears of joy at the very idea of that. Then I decided that I was going to royally fuck up every plot I didn't like from every show in the world. The first thing I was going to do, however was fuck with the teen titans. I quickly flipped through the channels on his Television. I honestly didn't know any of these shows, until I found one I did. Jackie Chan adventures. It was also an episode I was intimately familiar with. 'Queen of the Shadowkhan'. I smirked at this. This was good. I could totally deal with that. I played with the remote for a moment then with a press of a button, I was in the show. Specifically, as the thirteen-year-old Chinese girl with a tattoo of Tarakudo, the Oni Shogun himself. Now normally Control Freak would just take over for a character and then have fun running through their adventures. Or learn their skills and then use them himself. That's are far as I can remember through. Any memories of this guy were fuzzy and fading fast. But I knew the remote inside and out. And one button that the little lard ass wasn't willing to push for whatever reason, was the total reset button. It basically made him BECOME, the character. This was what I decided to do. I'd honestly rather be a thirteen-year-old athletic girl, than FAT dwarf.

2

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2

I became Jade Chan. Specifically I became Jade Chan Half-Oni daughter of Tarakudo. Oh, I know that She wasn't his daughter. She believed she had become the queen of the Shadowkhan. But I knew that what was really going on was that she had been infused with a heaping helping of demon chi, and spiritually she was the psuedo daughter of Tarakudo as long as she had his mark. And since I had no plan on allowing Uncle Jackie to remove MY mark it didn't matter. The first thing I did was command the shadowkhan to hide in my shadows. Then I pressed the release button taking myself and my new ninjas out of the show. Once I was back in the reality of the teen titans, I instantly felt better. It was odd. Considering that I didn't notice the headache building before I left the JCA universe. However as soon as I returned to the DCU the pressure in my head disappeared and I could think clearly. I scowled angrily at that. I had thought that I'd be stronger, I thought the reason Jade went crazy was because she was too young to handle the dark impulses. It seems there was more to the 'dark chi' taking over her mind than I had thought. I decided that before I did anything else I needed to meditate.

3

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3

After calming myself and driving out all my newly acquired darker impulses I realized something. My normally controlled emotions were now out of control. Right now, specifically my darker impulses. I wanted to fight. To take everything I wanted. Not good. I was mostly apathetic in my past life I didn't really care for much. I could not stay like this I would have to do something about it. And I smiled happily at the idea that had just popped into my head. With a wicked grin I left the basement and then the house. I made my way out of the neighborhood of the former owner of my body as the sun was setting over jump city. I made my way through the city towards the large 'T' shaped sky scraper. It took me two hours to get to the Titan's tower from the residential area. This honestly kind of pissed me off given that I knew Control Freak had a car but I couldn't remember where he kept the damned thing. Any way as I finally arrived at the entrance to the tower, I was honestly PISSED THE FUCK OFF to see the titan's all speed out of the tower through their various modes of transportation. As Robin's motorcycle passed me in a blur, I stomped my foot in indignation, the as soon as I had done it, I sat down at the entrance to the tower in mortification.

4

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4

It didn't take me long to calm down, or to get mad again. Considering that it took the Titans two hours to come back. When they all showed up out of a shadow, I stood up quickly. Robin's bike and Cyborg's SUV parked right in front of the door.

"So, who are you and why are you sitting on our doorstep?" Robin asked without preamble.

"I looked at his thoughtfully before smiling in bemusement and shaking my head at the straight forwardness from a ninja. "I am **** ******* and I was, killed, I guess in my universe. I woke up in your universe as Control Freak, and decided to use his remote to become the cartoon character Jade Chan. Now I was planning to fuck with you all for a while before coming clean and possible joining you as a Titan or possible just going to another reality via the remote. The problem is that I didn't fully understand what Demon chi would do to my brain while the demon was in the same dimension as me and I noticed that I was slowly being…. warped I guess is the best way to put it. So, I decided instead of playing with all of your heads the best this for me to do at this point, would be getting Raven's help with making sure I don't get overwhelmed by demon chi and go crazy."

The whole team blinked at me in confusion. "Look I know this is probably too weird to be believed." I started to say, only to be interrupted by Raven. "It's not that far-fetched, we've run into dimensional travelers before. I just don't know why you would know of us if you are a from a different universe."

I looked at them thoughtfully. "In my original world this reality was part of a comic book, cartoon, and movie world called the DCU or Detective comics universe. The characters involved were costumed superheoes. Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman." I looked at them steadily. "The teen titans."

THIS caused a reaction. Raven's eyes widened, Beast Boy turned into a cat and yowled, Robin just glared at me. "Exactly how detailed is your information on this 'universe'?" He asked grimly.

I looked at him for a moment deep in thought. "Do you know someone named Jason Todd?" I asked softly.

Robin stiffens. "What does that name mean to you?!" He demanded with a glare. I looked at him closely for a moment. "Is he still alive?" I asked in a matter-of-fact tone. That was when he moved. I felt the wind blown out of my lungs as my back was driven into the reinforced glass of the tower's door. "What do you know?!" He roared. "What do you mean is he still alive?"

"There was a movie." I said with a wheeze. "Joker had beaten him half to death and then left him in a building with a bomb." Robin eased back with Cyborg's hand on his shoulder. "Then Ras Al'Ghul brought him back with the Lazarus pit. But he came back pissed beyond belief that Bru- uh I mean Bats didn't kill joker for what he had down. He was fifteen when he was killed."

"Jason is dead." Robin said with a sigh. "When did Ra's resurrect Jason?" I could hear the desperation in his voice.

I sighed sadly. "He's already resurrected him. Jason is probably building resources for his plan. You had already changed your name and costume by the time he started. I have no idea where he was hiding out until he started though."

Robin nodded somberly. "So, Ras brought him back?" I nodded. "In the film when the Bat questioned him, He admitted to setting up the joker when it happened and that he didn't want anything like this to happen. He had overestimated his ability to control the Joker." I told him solemnly. "But don't worry Jason is going to be one hundred percent himself, just more Anti-Hero than Caped crusader."

"I have to stop him." Robin said with a firm determination. I shrugged awkwardly. "I don't think you can." I admitted regretfully. "You have to remember that Jason was also trained by the bat. And he was a street kid before he became your brother. He'll only be found if he wants to be found."

Robin sighed at this. "You're right Jason will only be found if he wants to be found. Now I suppose we should decide what to do about you."

I looked over at Raven. "Well, you could let me hang out with my sister from another father." Raven looked at me with an arched eyebrow. "You're not actually half demon." She said in a deadpan. "No but my body is." I told her with a smirk. "And I'd like to be in control of it please and thank you." I could see the smirk, small though it was, building on her lips. "Very well I'll teach you to control your body, mind and powers. Little Sister." It was then that I noticed the smirk widen. It was my turn to arch an eyebrow. "Considering that all I wanted in my first life was the chance to be the little sibling that was looked after do you really think calling me that is going to bother me?" I asked incredulously.

"I thought you said you used to be a dude?" Beast boy asked uncertainly. I frowned at him. "No What I said was that my original body was Male. That has nothing to do with my spiritual personification, only my physical genitalia. I would have totally been sexless most of the time if I could."

"Most of the time?" Cyborg asked hesitantly.

"Well yeah, I mean you can't do the nasty without the parts being there." I said with a frown. "I'm nonbinary not a-sexual."

"I don't care what your sexuality is." Robin said firmly. "But in the body of a twelve-year-old there will be no sex happening."

I blinked at him stupidly. "Dude! I told you I was almost thirty! I have NO desire to have sex with a child! Or a pedo!" The disgust for both options definitely carried in my voice. "If I want to have sex I'll just jump into a porno or something."

This caused a stunned silence that I didn't appreciate. "Look JADE is a child so this body is a child. However, I am not a child! I am almost thirty years old, which makes me older than all of you, so get over it!"

5

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5

The first thing that Raven had me deal with was meditation. The ability to focus my power inwards and gain insight into myself. With sure knowledge of self comes the inability to be manipulated UNKNOWINGLY. That doesn't mean I wouldn't be manipulatable, just that it couldn't happen without me knowing about it. This means that I'd have to lose a direct battle of wills to be controlled. It took me weeks inside my mind to review and organize my thoughts, feelings, and memories. Thankfully weeks inside your own head translates to a single weekend of meditation.

With all the mental work I had done I found two things I didn't really like.

{FLASHBACK}

The first thing I noticed was that my mind was arranged like a blockbuster after an earthquake. Which I personally thought was cool. I spent the time reviewing my memories. It was only when I had all the memories reviewed and reshelved, that I noticed the two sigils on the walls of the room. One was the mark of Tarakudo. The other was a Pentagram, and I don't just mean a reversed pentacle. I glared at it for a moment trying to figure out just why it was there. I stared at it until I heard a laugh. I twirled around to find myself staring at Mr. Mxyztplk.

"Looks like he got you good, doesn't it?" Mxyztplk said with a devilish smirk. "Would you like me to explain for you?"

I frowned at the imp. Then I nodded slowly. "If you would please?"

"You made a deal with Satan. He had your Ex-Stepfather's soul, and you challenged him for the return of said soul. He decided that there was no point in fighting a person with no power so he offered to send you somewhere you could train yourself up to be a challenge. The trick however is that you get one lifetime to grow strong. Then he decided to seal the memories of the deal so that you wouldn't remember how you got here, or WHY." The imp explains with a sadistic smile. "They don't call the morning star the father of lies for nothing."

"So, I made the original mistake." I said thoughtfully. "I trusted the word of Lucifer."

"Indeed, you did. Now the question is, what are you going to do about it?" The Imp asked with a grin.

"I'm guessing you have an option for me?" I asked warily. I wasn't surprised when I saw the look of anticipation on his face.

"Oh, I have more than an option little man, girl, whatever." He said eagerly. "I have an offer to give you the means to beat the morning star easily. In return you'll be doing me a favor. When you finish the favor, I'll even throw in a prize. If you succeed in the mission, I have for you then I'll make you a {GAMER}."

"First I would ask about the mission." I said with a frown.

"I want you to Assassinate Superboy Prime." Mr. Mxyztplk said with complete seriousness.

Needless to say, it spiraled from there. But in the end, I chose to agree to the imp's request.

{flashback end}

I looked out of the window at the titan's tower. It was almost time to go. Mr. Mxyztplk was going to give me a lift to my world's version of hell to kick Satan's ass. Then he was going to drop me off on my first world to train up for assassinating Superboy prime. I honestly felt slightly bummed out about this. I mean seriously. Here I am in the, sorry A, DC universe, and now I have to leave! It was frustrating as hell.

"You ready to go?" Mxyztplk asked behind me. I had to suppress a shiver. When I was in full control of my body's fear reaction to the imp I nodded and spoke. "I am." With a snap from the suited imp, I was gone. When I got over my discombobulation, I realized that I was in the middle of an arena standing opposite to a well-dressed man in an Armani suit. He narrowed his eyes at me and asked in a voice that promised pain and pleasure in equal measures.

"What is the meaning of this?" I looked at him with every bit of scrutiny I could use. He was about six feet, with short 'i've just been shagged rotten' black hair. Muscular like a porn star not a fighter. I wasn't thrown though. This was the morning star the father of lies. Former favorite of the almighty. No, I wasn't going to take this being lightly at all.

"Well Lucy it's like this." Mr. Mxyztplk said with a smirk from the Imp. "You decided to play dirty with the kid. So, I decided to take this opportunity to game his assistance for some personal business. All I had to do was to give him some help and bam boom I have a killer working for me."

"I only agreed to one assassination." I said stiffly. "And it was only partially to get the reward you offered." I held up the weapon provided by Mxyztplk. The Scythe from Dante's Inferno. And to top it off I was hopped up on Shendu's twelve talismans. So yeah, I'm super-fast, can fly, and immortal, and I have the personal weapon of the grim reaper. No, I'm not taking this easy at all.

"Now I believe you need to worry about the young lady with the scythe." Mr. Mxyztplk said waving a careless hand and causing a gong to sound. With that I charged forward as fast as I could and swung the scythe at Lucifers head. Needless to say, I was met with a Two-handed sword blocking my path.

"Did you really think it would be that easy?!" He sneered at me angrily. I smirked at his as he glowered at me. "Nope I thought it would be easier if you were a SLUG!" I said defiantly activating the Monkey Talisman. With the power of the Rabbit Talisman it was a synch shoving the scythe blade into the discombobulated devil/slug. I looked down at the clearly dead slug for a moment confused. Surely that wasn't it? I looked at the Imp sitting on a Romanesque throne. "Did I, win?"

Mr. Mxyztplk tilted his head in concentration, before he nodded slowly. "It would seem that you have. Your stepfather's soul has left Hell and is now in purgatory. And that means it's time for your training run before you go against Superboy Prime."

"Why don't I just go ahead and kill him now?" I asked holding up the Scythe. He looked at me with a deadpanned expression. "You do realize that he outclasses you in every way even with those talismans and the TINY amount of shadow magic you can use?"

I honestly couldn't keep the surprise off my face. "Seriously?!"

"Of course! Your nowhere near strong enough yet!" He bellowed in my face. "You are on the very LOW end for fighting in my Universe. But don't you worry I'm going to let you get all the Training you need to be able to kill him. By Assassination, that is. I'm not going to give you godhood. You can pursue that on your own after achieving my request."

I nodded slowly. "I suppose that will have to do. Let's get on with this." The Imp nodded with a wicked grin. "Well Bye-Bye Little girl!" He said before snapping his fingers making the world go black.