'This is contentment.' The Rokudaime's assistant thought as she stared into the Sixth Hokage signing papers in front of him. She is standing next to him, checking his work as he flips pages of the unsigned documents.
At the same time, she reminisced how she gotten to like the shinobi in front of her.
He is her longtime crush. It all started back in the academy. Snob and aloof back then, even with his own teammates, Rin and Obito. As for her, she's a shy girl and couldn't find the courage to befriend him. The only thing she could do is to admire him from distance. But when Lady Tsunade left the village with her, her admiration rested with it.
When Lady Tsunade decided to return to Konoha, she felt excited. Going back home is something she is yearning for so long. Nothing but that excites her... until she saw him again. Her forgotten admiration increases towards the boy, NO, towards the man. This time though, she is not seeing a silent, distant boy anymore but a perfectly framed attractive man. Her perfect guy.
What attracts her most is how he turned from a stoic-type boy to a now goofy and friendly shinobi. He smiles and talks more than she could count. She can feel his kind heart and gentle personality. He is a new Kakashi. The infatuation she had forgotten when they left Konoha deepens even more.
Her eyes soften on her thoughts, still lock on her boss in front.
This has been her deepest secret for a long time, even from Lady Tsunade and Tonton. No one knows but her and herself alone. She tried her best to stay calm and composed. Professionally hiding her inner screams whenever she sees him. She trained herself not to act like a fan girl when her Sixth Hokage is present. That is right, her Hokage-sama.
They are not close unfortunately. She knows little about him, Luckily, she was entrusted as the assistant of the Fifth Hokage. Reaching for his not-so-open-book is as easy as snapping her fingers. Ah. Fate.
Great. He is not married, as she reads. A bachelor. No. A handsome bachelor. But wait, how about a girlfriend? You cannot find that on any papers unless you ask someone close to your target. Former classmates? No. They'll notice for sure. Fate did it again for her. Sakura, one of his student, became her lady's apprentice. Confirmed. He has no girlfriend nor any rumored girl dating. With her inner skills, she easily extracted that info without Sakura noticing her intentions.
Whenever she felt Tsunade will assigned him on missions, she made sure that her schedule is with the lady so she can have a glance of him with no expanations required. He's a man of focus when it comes to his missions. He may be charming when his right eye smiles but her inner self is more attracted when he is serious. His ability, his analytical skills is adding to his overall coolness.
They don't talk that much. They only exchange smiles whenever they passed the Hokage's hallway. Missions and scroll handovers are the only thing between them. Nothing more. They never even hang out even on drinking parties with Lady Tsunade and their colleagues. She always sits beside the Godaime, assisting and controlling her drinks. Seats away from the Copy Ninja, who is always at the farthest corner of the table, where he could escape unnoticeable. He is the first one to leave and her the last for the Lady won't be satisfied until all bottles on the same bar are emptied. But hearing his deep voice with his little chats with their friends is enough.
With a respectable and high-ranking profile as a ninja, a busy schedule and continuous missions, it's highly impossible for her to be noticed by the man. Or to be specific, it's most likely that her feelings will be returned. But it never matter. It never really matter for her. Her affection does not need to be reciprocated. Caring for him is what truly matters.
Fate has come to her for the third time. Kakashi-sama, her childhood and longtime crush, will be appointed as Rokudaime. Her inside panicked. She remembers herself being calm physically after Lady Tsunade told her about his new position. She wanted to propose herself to be his assistant. Her profile for sure will be on top of the list as she is well-trained by her lady. All that she could feel is excitement. Unfortunately for her, it is not her to decide and that is something she can't control.
If it happens though, she will be a little closer. She can spend more time with him even if it's all about work. That is enough for her.
The day of handover comes. Lady Tsunade asked her to organize all documents inside. It is tiring, but a sneak of his handsome presence eases her stress.
She heard the Lady Tsunade scowls at Kakashi when he yawned. It is understandable. Sinking all information in a day, is definitely tiring. Even to her.
She turned to them. Kakashi is resting his face on his chin while the fifth do all the talking.
His lazy eyes suddenly turns to her direction. She gulped. 'I-is he looking at me?' Her inside panicked. But his eyes never left her. He is not just looking, it's already staring!!!
He straightened, eyes still on her, blinking as if he realized something. This is the first time, in her entire life of admiring him from afar, did he stare at her. Her heart races but her skill of hiding it did not disappoint her.
"That is right. Shizune-san." he said, ignoring the Sannin in front of him. "Care to be part of my team?"
That is the fourth time fate favored her.
"Oi Shizune-san." Kakashi called, interrupting her recollection with a snap of his fingers. She is back at the present time.
"Hokage-sama!"
Kakashi sighed. "Kakashi." he corrected. "You've spaced out. Something that matters?"
"I'm sorry. It was a tough day." she lied.
Kakashi stood and hand her the papers she needed. "You can go home now and rest." he said, smiling gently at her.
"Thank you Hokage-sama." she smiled back and headed towards the door.
"Shizune." he called before she leaves. "Kakashi!" he corrected again. The medic ninja chuckles and waved goodbye. A sigh was heard from the man when she left the room.
Her lips curled as she closed the door. Resting her back on the giant piece of wood for a second.
Nothing else. No expectations. She is fine with this. Little chats. Exchanging friendly smiles. Calling him Hokage-sama over and over to annoy him. Bringing him tea from time to time. Those little moment is what all she needed. She is grateful. This is her acceptance, caring and admiring him secretly is what she would always do.