A one-shot.
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Every Thursday evening after work, they went to Merle and Annie's house for dinner.
It was one of those things – one of those permanently in place plans – that was just part of their daily routine. And every Thursday when they arrived at the house, Annie was there, hugging them as if she hadn't just seen them the week before and Merle was already getting Daryl a beer. And since they knew Beth didn't drink, they had started stocking cranberry juice in their refrigerator just for her.
Their son, Hank, was eleven-months-old now and was just like his mama, always so excited to see his Uncle Daryl and Aunt Beth, always wanting to be held by one of them or toddling after them wherever they went in the house and wanting them to play with him and his toys. Daryl's evening usually ended with him on the living room floor with his nephew, playing with Hank's Fisher-Price dinosaur and caveman set, teaching the baby the best way for the caveman to shoot down the pterodactyl.
It was always so amazing to Daryl how many toys Hank had. It wasn't as if the baby had a ton. It wasn't as if Merle and Annie had the money to give their baby a ton of toys but Hank still had more toys than he and Merle ever had growing up. The only toys Daryl had ever had were all dirty and broken, handed down to him from Merle, who had found them in dumps.
Hank, on the other hand, was sitting on a soft blue fleece blanket spread across the floor that smelled like fabric softener, surrounded with toys and stuffed animals, some of which Daryl and Beth had gifted to him. Hank definitely didn't have the life of Dixon babies before him and the way Merle watched him with a prideful smile and twinkling in his eyes, Daryl knew that Merle's son would never have anything in common with their own childhood.
Beth stood in the kitchen, helping Annie clean and straighten up from dinner, and she dried the dishes as Annie washed them. The radio on the counter was on, turned to an oldies station, and Beth hummed along to the familiar Supremes song that was currently playing as Annie handed her one of the plates.
"How are things between you and Daryl, Beth?" Annie asked.
Beth smiled. "Wonderful," she answered the same as she did every other week Annie asked that question. And she knew Annie asked not because things seemed wrong between her and Daryl but because Annie kept waiting for some sort of announcement for the couple to make. Whether that announcement be an engagement or pregnancy and Beth knew that Annie wasn't the only one waiting for it. Her daddy, she knew, was not just waiting but expecting it.
Beth and Daryl both knew that people were wondering when they would take that next step together. They had been together for almost a year now and had been living together for just as long and to most, getting married just seemed like the next obvious step for the couple. Beth knew that just a few years ago, she would have been expecting Daryl to propose to her by now at this point in their relationship but the current Beth, the Beth she was now, wasn't even sure she wanted that.
She loved Daryl Dixon. Loved him more than anything in this world. She had never loved anything the way she loved him. And she wanted to be with him forever. In her heart, she knew that they were always going to be together. She didn't need a ring or wedding to know that. And it wasn't like Daryl was giving any signs that he wanted to get married either.
And Daryl loved her. Told her in whispers as they laid in bed in the small bedroom in the trailer, his arms around her and his breath warm in her ear.
He would still surprise her with little gifts like he had when they had just started getting closer to one another all that time ago and he had begun courting her in a way. He would surprise her with Hershey chocolate – her favorite – or some wildflowers he had come across in the woods or a new bracelet for her wrist even though she knew that he didn't think she had to hide the scar.
They slept with his arms around her or his hand on her hip or her feet tucked between his legs so he could keep them warm for her and when he found out about a group meeting for those suffering from eating disorders being held in a church basement two towns over, he had given subtle encouragement to her to think about maybe going and he went with her every other week to show his silent support when she asked him if he could come, too.
Beth didn't know what she would do without Daryl in her life but she didn't worry about the day coming when he would no longer be around. She never worried about that because she had complete confidence that it would never happen. And getting married wouldn't change anything between them except she would be Beth Dixon instead of Beth Greene and she knew that what her last name was wasn't important to what their relationship was.
If she worried about anything in their relationship, it was her.
She knew there was something nestled deep within her mind that made her be the one that didn't want to get married. She didn't want to thrust the burden of her upon Daryl. She knew she was getting better but she knew she could be difficult and testing and right now, Daryl seemed fine with all of her issues and her health problems and what it was taking to overcome it all but someday, down the road, he might not be fine with it and she didn't want to have some ring keeping him to her if he really wanted to walk away.
Beth and Annie finished the dishes and as Annie excused herself to go to the bathroom, Beth went back towards the living room, lingering in the doorway between the two rooms, watching Daryl as he sat on the floor with his nephew, letting Hank hit him in the cheek over and over again with his stuffed black bear that Daryl had bought him when he was first born. Daryl was just sitting there, smirking, asking the baby what the hell he was doing, and Hank just giggled with laughter as if he understood.
And that was another reason why Beth knew she couldn't marry Daryl. She would never be able to have children. Her daddy liked to say that medical miracles happened every day but starving herself severely for years had had its consequences and screwing up several of her body's systems was one of the ones that was irreversible. She would never be able to have a baby and though Daryl had never said anything to make her think that he wanted a child of his own someday, that might change and she didn't want him to be married to a woman who wouldn't be able to give him one.
Daryl lifted his head then and saw her standing in the doorway, smiling faintly as she watched, and he smiled a little in return.
She was wearing a dress that evening as she wore a dress every other weekday – a green one today with one of her gray cardigan sweaters because no matter what, she was always cold – and her hair had been down but somewhere between dinner and now, she had tied it back in a braid. He wasn't quite sure how she managed it but every day, she seemed to be prettier than the one before and he still wasn't all that sure as to why the hell she was with him.
He thought about it a lot even though he tried to get himself to stop. He reminded himself that they had been together for almost a year now and she had never given him the slightest hint that she wasn't happy. Every time she lifted her head at her desk in the office and looked out the window that overlooked the garage, if he was already looking at her, the instant their eyes met, she burst into a smile as if they hadn't seen one another in days. She held his hand and wrapped her arms around him in as tight a hug as a little thing like her could give him and she brushed hair back from his forehead and kissed him softly on the lips and murmured to him in a quiet voice that she loved him so much. Always so much.
Even with Merle completely turning his life around, getting out of prison and marrying Annie and getting a legitimate job and having this house and now, having Hank, Daryl never saw any of that for himself. He liked his trailer in the woods and he liked being by himself, going to work and then going home and going hunting and that was his life. He never saw himself having more. Never saw himself with a house and a wife and a kid. He just saw himself with Beth and he knew he wanted to always see himself with her. That was pretty much the extent of him looking into the future.
He never saw the point behind making plans because no matter how much a person planned for something, the universe had a way of doing whatever the hell it felt like doing and there was never too much a person could do to avoid it.
He had this life and he was happy with this life. It was better than any life he could have ever imagined having for himself and he knew it was all because of that blonde woman standing in the doorway, watching him with a smile on her face and a slight pinkness to her cheeks.
No, Daryl Dixon had no right being with a girl like Beth Greene and he supposed he wasn't the only one who thought that. But for some reason, Beth didn't seem to think that. She told him every day, more than once, that she loved him and who was he to question her? He couldn't doubt her because she looked at him right in the eye and said those words without wavering or hesitating and every time she did, no matter how many times she said them, it always made him feel warm all over and he wanted to be warm like that for the rest of his life. Beth was the only one who could get him to feel like that.
He thought sometimes about asking her to marry him. Merle and Rick had both asked him about it and Hershel Greene had been dropping his own hints – more and more lately; hints the older man thought were subtle but were actually anything but.
And Daryl seriously considered it from time to time but there was something always holding him back. Beth loved him and she made her happiness with him damn obvious but he knew that things like that might not last forever. Some people got married and stayed married for the rest of their lives, but other people got married and spent the rest of their days in misery. He didn't know how it would be for him and Beth. He loved her and she loved him but who was to say that one day, she wouldn't wake up and hate the very sight of him?
He didn't want to keep Beth with him just because he was selfish and couldn't imagine his life without her. He didn't want to force her to stay with him if all she wanted to do was leave just because he put a ring on her finger. He'd would more than willingly kill himself before he did anything to make Beth unhappy.
And maybe it wouldn't be like that. Maybe they would get married and she would be happy with him until the day one of them died and it would be a good life. But he just couldn't be sure of it because he still had such a hard time believing that she was really happy with him in the first place.
"Beth, you have to come see the adorable costume I have for Hank this year for Halloween," Annie beckoned Beth and Beth left to go into the baby's nursery.
Merle looked down the hallway to see that the women were gone before looking back to Daryl, now playing with Hank and his fire truck and plastic firemen. "How are things between you and Beth goin'?" He asked.
Daryl lifted his eyes to him and gave him a little smile. "Real good," he said but never one to divulge more than he had to, he lowered his eyes back to the baby and the toys.
A few minutes later, Beth came back into the room and couldn't hide her yawn and Daryl pushed himself to his feet, saying it was probably time they head home for the night. Merle hefted Hank up and Beth smiled, taking the baby in her arms, hugging and kissing him goodnight and smelling his wonderful scent of baby powder.
Annie hurriedly went into the kitchen and returned, shoving a plastic container of leftovers into Daryl's hands. Hank was then passed to Daryl, who kissed him on the head and didn't even flinch as Hank grabbed the scruff on his chin and tried to yank it off. Annie hugged them both and Merle kissed Beth on the cheek and there was a chorus of goodnights from everyone as Beth and Daryl stepped from the house, heading to his bike parked in the driveway. The night was clear and cool and Beth tightened the sweater around herself as she tilted her head up and looked at the stars twinkling in the black ink sky.
"It's so beautiful tonight," she said with almost a dreamy sigh, her smile faint.
She then looked at Daryl to find that he was looking right at her and she didn't need for him to say anything for her stomach to flip and clench as it usually did when Daryl looked at her with that dark look in his eyes.
She reached over and took his hand, sliding her fingers between his. Daryl held onto her hand tightly and she moved in a few steps, closer to him, her chest brushing along his.
"Le's go home," he said in his low gruff voice that could always make her shiver.
She smiled again and nodded slightly, staring right up into his eyes. "Nowhere else I'd rather go," she told him softly and Daryl leaned down then and brushed his lips across hers.
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