I have begun another one - Yep I know, I haven't forgotten about Least Traveled Road, despite the fact I may have jumped the shark with that story. I will finish. Posting this to see what you guys think Please Read and Review as it helps me a lot, inspires me to write more.

This is AU, I really wanted to write something where Joey and Pacey never grew up together.

Chapter 1

On a Wednesday morning in July

We dried our tears and we said goodbye

Another angel gone before her time

But she's still alive in our hearts and minds

You never know, you never know

What you've got until it's gone

But heavens knows that when are old

She will be forever young

Tonight we sent an angel home

Sing out and celebrate her song

Tonight she'll go where we can't go

Sing out, sing out, sing out

Oh oh oh

Oh oh oh

There are things in life we can't explain

In a blink of an eye everything can change

So just appreciate the little things

'Cause you never know what tomorrow brings

You never know, you never know

What you've got until it's gone

But heavens knows that when are old

She will be forever young

Tonight we sent an angel home

Sing out and celebrate her song

Tonight she'll go where we can't go

Sing out, sing out, sing out

Oh oh oh

There's an empty room at home

Uh uh uh

How can it be so damn cold

Uh uh uh

Together we're not alone

Uh uh uh

Tonight we sent an angel home

Sing out and celebrate her song

Tonight she'll go where we can't go

Sing out, sing out, sing out

Oh oh oh

On a Wednesday morning in July

We dried our tears and we said goodbye

Angel - Kodaline

It was typical cliched weather, the clouds hung dark and threatening in the sky, blocking the sun from penetrating the chill in the atmosphere around the small gathering. Joey stood, her arm slung protectively over her friend as she silently sobbed, clutching Joey's waist in despair, a handkerchief at her nose and her watery eyes downcast. Joey stood tall, hoping to be the rock for the small blonde at her side.

She looked around her, the cemetery was quiet, the priest spoke in a soft, lulling tone. The occasional sniffle or blowing of ones nose sounded through the air. Joey discreetly wiped a tear from her eye before it had the chance to travel any further. Her eyes roamed the small gathering by the graveside, Joey only knew a few faces. Jack, stood close by his father, an expression of despair. To Joey's left stood Dawson, he stood emotionless. Joey could only assume he was still in shock over the events of the past week. Joey pulled Jen closer to her side, tightening her arm around the small woman. Everyone else were unknown to Joey, as was the small seaside town the funeral was being held.

Jen had spoken of Capeside, a beautiful picturesque sea side town on the cape, although the reason for her first visit was not under the best of circumstances the beautiful landscape was not lost on her as they had entered the small town hours previously. Joey looked up to find a lone figure standing by a large oak opposite, in her direct line of vision, a tall man, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. His face obscured as his looked at his feet. Joey felt drawn to him, having no discernible reason as to why. He looked up and their eyes locked briefly, Joey felt her breath catch in her throat. The sadness was unmistakable, even with the distance between them. His eyes blue as the ocean yet clouded with an emotion other than sadness, regret?

No, it appeared something akin to guilt.

He dropped his head once again to survey the ground beneath him, searching for answers in the sodden earth beneath him. Joey stood, barely listening to the words being spoken about the terrible loss of a young life, one taken too soon. It was always the same wasn't it?

Funerals, words spoken about a person, usually too late. Words that should be said when they were alive. Sometimes Joey wondered if people held onto those words because they couldn't say them to the living, for whatever reason. They kept them locked up within them, avoiding saying them because of confronting emotions they had no idea how they might handle them or how they could possibly be taken.

There had been many words spoken at her own mother's funeral years before that had never been spoken while she had lived, Joey had spoken many of those words to her as she sat by her grave, laid flowers. She had never said anything to her mother while she was alive, not what she really wanted or needed to say.

Did it mean anything, did it make a difference that she had said them when she was dead?

She supposed not.

The low rumbling of thunder made it's way across the sky as the priest wrapped up and moved to offer his condolences to the mourners. Joey looked about her, noticing the man from beneath the tree had left, a small tightening in Joey's chest passed through her before she noticed Jen tugging on her arm, pulling her toward the car. Joey mentally shook off the feeling he had invoked within her, it was deja vu, in a sense. Something she had never quite felt, she had certainly never seen him before and yet he seemed, no; felt familiar.

Jen and Joey walked in silence to the line of cars parked on the kerb outside of the cemetery, Dawson trailed behind slowly. Joey sat behind the wheel, knowing Jen was in no state to drive. She blew her nose softly and buckled her seatbelt as Joey pulled away from the kerb and onto the street, heading back towards town to Evelyn Ryan's house where the wake was to be held.

Joey noted Dawson's demeanour as he sat quietly in the backseat, looking out over the landscape as it whirred past. Joey frowned, all her friends were broken and there was nothing she could do to help them except be there for them when they would eventually turn to her.

Joey was new to the close knit group of friends, having met Jen at a small cafe close to Worthington campus six months prior. Jen had been sitting at a table alone, waiting for Jack in the crowded cafe, Joey had ordered herself a coffee to go but the rain had begun to beat down while she had stood in line to be served and had stood awkwardly in the coffee shop waiting for a break in the weather so she could make a run for it. Jen had noticed her and had offered her a seat.

Joey had never had any close friends, much less girlfriends. She had spent most of her twenty one years on her own, spending most of her time with her books and studies. Now as her third year at Worthington College was slowly coming to an end she found herself within a small group of very close friends. Sometimes it felt as though Jen and Jack had been in her life forever, she loved them dearly and could not imagine life without them. She didn't know Dawson very well, he seemed to drift in and out of their little group on a whim, when he found the time to pull away from his own small group of pretentious film making friends. Joey was truly happy for this as she didn't quite feel comfortable around him, he was nice enough but there was something about him she simply could not relate to, while optimism and dreams were certainly an attribute, Joey couldn't help but wonder if one could get by in life on those things alone.

Joey was a realist and quite the cynic, believing that life was not simply all about hearts and flowers. Certainly she liked to believe they existed, but the life she had lived up until now did nothing to stave of her misanthropical view of the world and the lives of those which lived within it.

Joey pulled Jen's car up along the many others parked by Grams Ryan's boundary fence, they all slowly got out and headed into the house.

Joey and Jen busied themselves helping Grams with the food and drinks until there was nothing left to do, Jack arrived along with his father, he sat alone in the kitchen, his head down. Jack had completely shut down over the past week, not even Jen could get through the walls he'd erected in the time.

Their Boston house felt different now, as though something had been taken away. In the four months Joey, Jack and Jen had been living in the place it had been filled with fun and laughter. Now things were different, and while Joey knew it had only been a week it felt as though maybe things would never be the same.

There was sadness and despair but also anger which hung around Jack and Dawson. Joey moved through the front door, the old hinges squealing in protest as she passed through it to offer Jen a cup of tea. Jen smiled gratefully. They stood for a beat in silence.

"Thank you for coming Joey, you really didn't have to." Jen spoke softly as she looked down across the lawn to the small dock and the creek beyond, Joey glanced at her friend and gave her a small smile.

"It's the least I could do Jen." Said Joey, taking a sip from the small, intricately painted tea cup. Jen only nodded, letting out a breath of exhaustion.

"I'm worried about Jack" Jen said, glancing into the house momentarily before turning to Joey, she nodded knowingly.

Losing someone you loved was bad enough, losing a family member was almost unbearable. Joey knew this all too well, some nights she still even cried herself to sleep at the loss of her mother, now lately more than ever. Their recent loss exacerbating all of the feelings she had pushed down inside of her for so many years so she could move on with her life. Oddly, at times more recently, Joey felt as though she was now grieving for her mother all over again.

Jen and Joey's attention was pulled from their own private musings by the sound of Dawson's voice, Joey and Jen looked to each other before their eyes moved to find Dawson following someone from the side of the house. Joey recognised the other figure as being the man she had seen beneath the oak tree at the funeral.

The two spoke to each other barely above whispers, Joey could tell by the body language of the two men it was not a pleasant conversation and looked to be quite heated. Joey could make out a few words spoken by Dawson at the man but was unable to hear any of his responses to him.

Joey watched on as Dawson poked at the man in anger, he simply shook his head or swiped Dawson's hand away. Joey could see Dawson's facade begin to crumble as the man waved his hands around, wildly gesticulating. He didn't however lose his temper at Dawson or raise his voice. The man began to move away from Dawson and turned toward the house, he made his way up the front steps and disappeared inside, not acknowledging Jen or Joey at all. Joey turned to watched as he disappeared into the house. She turned to Jen who by now had a frown across her face as she too watched him vanish from view. Joey turned to watch Dawson walk off towards a large white house across from Grams'. Joey tilted her chin towards Dawson's retreating figure.

"Is he going to be okay?" She asked Jen. Jen shrugged before finally nodding.

"Yeah, he just needs to cool down, he'll be fine." Joey chewed on her lip with worry.

"What just happened?"

"What always happens." Jen sighed and turned to enter the house.

Jen stood in the doorway to the kitchen and watched the exchange between the two men, speaking in hushed tones before Jack nodded and sat down at the table.

"I need to get back to Boston, but you know where I am Jack. " Jack simply nodded numbly and watched as he moved off towards the back door. He turned to look back at Jen and gave a small smile before heading out the door. Jen quickly made her way to the door and called to him.

"I'm sorry." She called out. He turned and shrugged as he opened the drivers door of his mustang.

"Yeah." He cleared his throat and nodded. "Me too Lindley. Take care of Jack." He said, jumped in the car and drove off. Jen waved, although it was well after he was gone, she stood at the back door and looked behind her to Jack, knowing that as close as they were it was not going to be easy to help him get through this. They had been through a lot together and had always found themselves out of what ever cloud they had found them selves in, this however felt different. Jen felt completely out of her depth.

Hours had passed by slowly and Joey and Jen stood in the kitchen saying their goodbyes to Grams. Dawson had never come back from his parents place and Jack had left with his father. Grams shook her head at her granddaughter.

"No Jennifer, it's fine. I can clean up. You ladies had better get back." Jen nodded and Grams turned to Joey. "It was a pleasure meeting you Josephine." She said, drawing her into an embrace. The sudden show of affection from the older woman took Joey by surprise, she reciprocated awkwardly but smiled as she pulled away.

"You too Mrs Ryan." She spoke softly, Grams nodded her head and followed the two women out into the yard, Jen drew the keys from her bag and looked over the creek, the sun was slowly setting on the horizon.

"I'll talk to you soon Grams." She nodded her head and stood back, waving to Jen and Joey as Jen backed out and turned the car around. Joey waved from the passenger seat and they made their way onto the road, out of town toward Boston.

Joey sat in the dim light of the kitchen of their house in Boston, Joey was surprised how the beautiful semi detached house had become a home and Jen and Jack much like family. Joey had moved in with Jen and Jack four months prior when Jen had asked her, claiming the dorms were lonely and seeing as the house was a gift from her father out of guilt for being a crappy father Jen beamed that she wouldn't have to pay for rent or the utilities. Joey had jumped at the opportunity to have her own room and people to share space with she actually liked. Lisa, her Worthington roommate was a little creepy, wearing dark clothes and wandering around with Edgar Allen Poe literature where ever she went in the dead of night. Joey was convinced she belonged to some odd satanic cult, it was either that or perhaps simply Joey's overactive imagination and skittish kitten tendencies.

Jen had retired to bed an hour earlier, exhaustion of the day's events finally taking it's toll on her.

Joey allowed the silence wash over her while sitting, nursing a cup of herbal tea. Her thoughts went back to the days events, she was glad to have finally made it through the day with her self intact, emotionally speaking. For a long time after her mother's passing Joey refused to set foot in a church, regardless of the occasion. She had spent the entire ceremony of her cousin's wedding two years ago in the front garden of the church. She was thankful today was a graveside funeral so she could attend and be there for Jen.

Joey's thoughts went back to the young man with the ocean blue eyes, she could still feel the sadness and guilt she had discovered there. The familiarity about him also confused her, she had certainly never seen him before. Joey frowned, maybe she had seen him in passing somewhere on the street or at Worthington. He looked to be the same age as she so it was possible, not really probable but nevertheless.

Joey quickly glanced at her watch and decided it was getting late, she had an early day planned of studying at the library in the morning. Joey stood and moved to the sink, she tipped the remaining tea down the drain and moved out of the kitchen.

There was an eeriness to the hall within the darkness Joey never felt before, knowing it was more than likely a mix of her exhaustion, the heightened emotional state the day had brought on and the late hour.

Joey yawned as she slipped quietly into her room and beneath the welcoming sheets of her bed, she closed her eyes, the days events passing through her mind . Pausing every so often on certain events. Him standing beneath the large oak. Dawson arguing with him in the yard at Grams. Joey couldn't get him out of her head, she had no idea who he even was.

Joey sighed and closed her eyes, slowly drifting off to sleep. The last of her thoughts were of the man with the eyes which mimicked that of the ocean, swirling with sadness and guilt.

The gentle lapping of the water of the creek sounded against the pilings of the dock. Normally the clear blue sky above could help him with regards to signs or, perhaps hope for the future his mostly optimistic side was now in hibernation. The weather completely betrayed the storm within himself. He stood looking out over the creek, glassy stillness of it's surface reflected the vision of a man who felt hollow inside.

Dawson stood, his hands deep in his pockets while he stood, the sun close to breaking over the trees on the horizon. Dawson felt completely and utterly lost, something he had never felt before, certainly not on such a grandiose scale.

She was gone.

He loved her more than anything and she was gone.

She was gone and he knew exactly who to blame.

And he knew it too.

Dawson, vaguely aware of footfall along the worn, wooden dock tilted him head back, knowing who it was before he spoke.

"How you doing Dawson?" Mitch stood beside his son and looked out to the water, the sun beginning to glisten on the surface of the lake in the early morning. Dawson let out a heavy breath, no words to speak of however. "I know it seems as though everything is falling apart and they don't make sense but. "He turned to Dawson. "You can't keep this up." He said. Dawson finally looked to his father and lifted his brow in disbelief.

"It's been just over a week Dad, what do you you expect." Mitch shook his head.

"I know son, I know. I'm not asking you to forget about everything, about her or about what you had."

"What are you saying then?" His tone bitter, his stance challenging. His father no idea what he was currently going through, he had no idea and yet here he stood assuming the role of a man with all the answers.

"What I am saying is that you need to begin to move on, she wouldn't want this." Dawson's response was a mere snort of asperity. "She wouldn't want you to give up." He continued, ignoring his son. Dawson only shook his head while he begun to turn away form the creek.

"Excuse me while I try to ignore the considerable amount of hypocrisy in that Dad."

Mitch allowed his shoulders to slump with defeat, he used to pride himself of being able to give his son advice, to be the rock of insurmountable strength, he now couldn't be that man for Dawson. He did hope his son would be able to find his way out and while he knew he needed to figure it out he also was not so naive that it would take a mere week to get out of this fog of sadness he found himself trying to navigate within.

Dawson shook his head as he made his way into the bedroom, slamming the door to make more of a point than to show his anger.

"Unbelievable" He mumbled, pulling at his clothes from their hangers and tossing them haphazardly into the waiting suitcase. Where did he get off, he knew nothing about what Dawson was feeling, he couldn't even imagine how he could possibly know that the love of his life was now gone. She was dead and he was left to go through the rest of his life broken and stumbling to pick up the pieces after she left him.

While she left him he could not be angry with her, it wasn't really her fault.

It was the fault of someone else entirely, that one man who still had a hold of her heart, even after all these years.

Dawson was angry with him and he and he alone was to blame.

Dawson finished packing his clothes and pulled his suitcase from the bed and dragged it down the stairs. He left his suit in the wardrobe in his childhood room, not wanting to be reminded of why he was there in the first place. He knew that when he got back to Boston there would be enough of a reminder of her, of what he had lost.

The warm mid may breeze tugged at Jen's soft blonde curls as she locked her car outside of her house, leaves from the large oaks rustled in the spring flurry. Jen sighed and smiled as she made her way up to the house. A week had passed by slowly as her small group attempted to regain their footing, she had spoken to Jack over the phone each night and although he had not returned to Boston she knew he was beginning to cope with his loss. It was going to be hard, she knew that. She was thankful he had not shut down all lines of communication entirely.

Jack would be staying for the rest of the semester along with the summer in Capeside.

Jen had opted to stay in Boston for the summer and continue to work in the small cafe three blocks away, Joey worked at Hell's Kitchen, a bar not too far away from Boston Bay college and would not be returning to Pennsylvania for the summer either.

Jen had not spoken to Dawson at all in the past week, she had tried to reach out to him only to get his answering machine, her phone calls screened and her messages never acknowledged.

Jen dug into her bag at the sound of her phone ringing.

"Hello" She smiled into the phone.

"Hey Lindley, we still on for lunch tomorrow?" He asked her.

"Well, it is Wednesday." She grinned knowing it never mattered which day it was they always caught up for lunch when they were both free to do so. Jen closed the door behind her with her foot, Joey looked up from her book as she sipped at a glass of iced tea at the kitchen island counter. Jen offered her a wave, she grinned back. "Actually, I was hoping to invite my friend along too."

"Oh, okay sure. See you tomorrow then Jen."

"Okay, Bye."

Jen made her way into the kitchen and hoisted herself upon the kitchen stool. Joey sat her book up and smiled at her friend, happy she was beginning to see the Jen she knew beginning to return. "So, you coming out to lunch tomorrow?" Jen asked "I'm meeting a friend" Jen noticed Joey's hesitation, knowing her enough by now to understand Joey felt uncomfortable around other people she placed her hand over her arm and smiled warmly. "He's an old friend, he may be a little sarcastic but he's a good guy." She said, Joey nodded finally although with no small amount of trepidation.

Joey frowned, while she was thankful Jen had happily brought her into her circle of friends she felt nervous each time a new person was introduced to her, especially seeing as most of her friends were close as they had all known each other for a long time. Joey really had no one, a friend or two back home but she had never really been close to them and they didn't talk much after graduation. Now they were preparing to wrap up their third year of college. The first two and a half years was filled with her working or studying, meeting Jen really only by chance. She was happy as she and Jen had become very close in the six months they knew each other, while Jen and Joey talked a lot about their current lives in Boston Joey rarely talked about her life back in Pennsylvania , Jen had spoken of some of her friends and life back in Capeside and New York, they had not really opened up to each other fully. Joey knew it would eventually.

Joey sighed, she knew she had to try harder to be less nervous around new people, maybe going out to lunch would help her to come out of her shell more.