Hey everyone, I hope everyone is doing ok out during this time of need. The first 2 chapters are rewrites. And when I read it and then heard it. It sounds off to me. So I decided to rewrite it. or is it revamp. I'm not sure. But I wanted this story to sound better if you listen to it instead of reading it. And since it has been I think almost a year or less I've decided to post 3 chapters. I am still working on chapter 4. This story is a slow burn so be patient.

I don't own Naruto

Masashi Kishimoto does!

Konoha's Unpredictable

Prankster

Chapter 1

It was just like any other day in The Village Hidden in the Leaves. Most villagers were waking up while many villagers were already doing their early morning routines. The sunrise was coming up over the Hokage Monument and everything was peaceful. Till the screams of outrage villagers were sounding off throughout the village. And the name of the person the angered most of the villagers this morning was.

"Naruto!"

Uzumaki Naruto, Konoha's most unpredictable child and the self-proclaimed world's number one prankster.

Hokage office

Hiruzen Sarutobi is a elderly man who is almost 70 years of age. He is a battle hardened shinobi that has been part of three shinobi wars. Even if he's up there in age don't let it deceive you. Some of the older generations from the first and second shinobi wars know him as the "Old Monkey." While some of the other generation know him as "The Professor." And to his enemies he is known as the "God of Shinobi." But to everyone in The Leaves Village he is known as the Sandaime Hokage, the fire shadow of the land of fire.

When the Sandaime Hokage came to his office this morning. He came in with his battle hardened eyes. He was ready to destroy his biggest enemy in the world, paperwork! Oh how he wished he could use a fire jutsu on the paperwork. So he could just be done with it. As much as he wants to see the paperwork disappear.

There are many important documents. When it comes down to running a ninja village. But that never stops the old monkey. From completing his day to day task. Everyday before he begins his work for the day. He usually makes himself some hot tea and smokes his tobacco. All the while in the privacy of his office. The Sandaime Hokage is reading his Icha Icha Paradise, his guilty pleasure.

Out of nowhere an Anbu appeared while kneeling and giving a bow. This made the Hokage put his precious book down, and gave a small sigh. So he gave a nod for the bird masked Anbu to proceed with his verbal report.

"Hokage-sama we have a situation on our hands." The Anbu said this in a monotone while still kneeling. "The Uzumaki child just pulled another prank on the villagers." The Anbu replied as he continued with his report. "To make matters worse, He has done some property damage. All of the villagers are not too pleased, as well Hokage-sama." The Anbu said as he waited for his Hokage to decide what to do.

"I see." Said the Sandaime, while sighing to himself.

"So what did he do this time?" Question the Sandaime Hokage.

"Hokage-sama, he pretty much rigged most of the civilians front doors. So when they opened the door the traps would set off. Either you were hit with a balloon filled with paint, water, or flour." the Anbu stopped to recount all the traps that they found. "Hokage-sama, that was just the first set of traps. That we manage to discover at first. The child placed a secondary trap, just in case the first ones failed Hokage-sama." The Anbu finished reporting.

The Sandaime raised an eyebrow as he heard the Anbu's report of the situation on hand.

"So what was the other trap then?" Asked the aged Sandaime Hokage as he sighed once again.

"Hokage-sama, he pretty much used animal feces and urine to catch the civilian off guard if his first trap wasn't successful." The bird masked Anbu said with some hesitation.

The Hokage wanted to facepalm. But he just groaned instead. "Where is Naruto-kun now?" The Hokage asked as he took another puff of his tobacco to calm his nerves.

"It was reported that he went to Ichiraku Ramen stand Hokage-sama." The Anbu reported

"Tori, bring Naruto-kun to my office please." The Sandaime Hokage said while taking a sip of his tea.

"As you wish Hokage-sama." The Anbu said as he left the Hokages office in a swirl of leaves.

Ichiraku's

"Hey old man, Ayame-neechan good morning. Can I get three bowls of miso ramen please." Naruto said excitedly.

"Good morning Naruto-kun you seem happy this morning." said Ayame with a warm smile.

"Oh yeah I had a lot of fun this morning, before coming here to eat." Naruto said with his foxy grin.

"Ah good morning Naruto you are up earlier than normal. Is there something special going on today?" Teuchi asked, having an eyebrow raised at the young blond.

Naruto gave a sheepish grin, while rubbing the back of his head. As he tried to think of a good excuse for a reason why he acted so strangely this morning.

"Well old man, I had a great workout this morning. I'm practicing to sharpen my ninja skills. So far all my hard effort in training has been paying off." The young blond said as he gave his foxy grin.

"Well done Naruto, I know you will achieve your dream someday. Just keep working hard and never let your determination waiver. Teuchi said showing Naruto he had full confidence in him.

"First bowl of ramen is on the house." Teuchi said, so enjoy it.

"Thank you old man I really appreciate it." Naruto said in the most respectful way while giving Teuchi a small bow.

"Naruto here is your first bowl. I hope you enjoy it. Ayame said with a smile on her face.

"Thank you Ayame-neechan." Naruto said while beaming at her.

Once Naruto got his hands on the bowl of ramen. He became quiet and started to eat his food rapidly. Some time passed while the young blond devoured bowl after bowl. Teuchi and his daughter could only watch in amusement. How Naruto was able to put down that amount of ramen in such a little body. The kid was about to get started with another bowl, when an Anbu appeared.

"Uzumaki-san, Hokage-sama requested you to see him immediately." The Anbu said in a monotone.

"Ok, I'll leave as soon as I finish eating this bowl of ra…!" But Naruto never got the chance to finish speaking.

"Hokage-sama asked me to bring you immediately. Please Uzumaki-san don't make it harder than it needs to be. Or else I may be required to take you by force." The bird mask Anbu said once again in a monotone voice.

Naruto sweat drops with what the Anbu said. He thought about what he should do next. He quickly decided what he was going to do. So he told the bird mask Anbu.

"Okay, okay, easy there birdy. I'll leave right away then. O-Oh Anbu-san can you pay for me please, thanks. I'll see you at Hokage-jiji's office, I don't want to be late." Naruto said as he took off running without saying another word. The bird mask Anbu was about to leave, but Teuchi called him out.

"Anbu-san, someone needs to pay for the food young Uzumaki-kun ate." Teuchi said while laughing to himself about the misfortune of this Anbu.

The Anbu was caught off guard and was left standing dumbfounded. When he was told that he had to pay for the Uzumaki brats food. Thinking nothing of it, he asked for the total he had to pay.

"That's going to be 1500 ryo for his ten bowls of ramen." Teuchi said with a happy smile on his face.

Hearing this the bird masked Anbu almost lost his composure. His Anbu training was the only thing restraining him. From killing the young kid he then curses the Uzumaki brat under his breath. Leaving him barely with any money left. Thinking on the best way to get his revenge on the brat. He remembered that if anyone ever hurt the young blond brat. The Sandaime Hokage would execute any person hurting his adopted grandson. He then gave the correct amount of ryo to the owner and shunshin in a swirl of leaves.

Hokage offices

The Sandaime Hokage was hard pressed with all the paperwork that he was working on. He was cursing the Yondaime for never sharing the secret to do the paperwork.

(Flashback)

The Yondaime was a prodigy born once a generation. Ever since he was in the academy he out shined every today Yondaime has the best ninja record for the chunin exams. Uchiha Itachi was another prodigy that came close to beating the record. Namikaze Minato was the first rookie to enter the chunin exams alone and win it in a battle royale.

He became Jiraiya's apprentice and was hungry for his thirst for knowledge. And his love to learn new jutsu. Cemented his eagerness to protect his family, friends and the village. And in the third shinobi war Namikaze Minato became the Konoha's Yellow Flash, he pretty much single-handedly put an end to the war. Killing thousands Iwa shinobi earning his flee-on-sight order. Around the same time he was able to help push back Kumo forces. Even going into battle with both A and his brother Bee the eight-tail jinchuriki to a draw.

When the time came to choose a successor. To the surprise of the entire village and the displeasure of others. The Sandaime Hokage chose Namikaze Minato to be the Yondaime Hokage. In a month-time he began to learn his position of Hokage. And during that time he was able to discover the secret to finish his paperwork.

He classified it as a double S-rank secret punishable by disgrace. Leaving many clan heads of the village and the rest of the village council leaders cursing the Yondaime too. The only person who had the privilege to know this well kept secret was the Fire Daimyo. This rumor spread around the Elemental Nations making the Yondaime a very hated man by most nations. Many hidden villages sent spies to find and steal the secret to defeating paperwork. Unfortunately none were successful, and many were caught in the process and sent to T&I. Not even Orochimaru knew the secret and he was considered a genius.

(End flashback)

The Sandaime Hokage wanted more free time for himself. Time to spend with his family. Time to walk in the village, just like when he was a kid himself. Time to enjoy his twilight years of his life. And most of all, time for his beloved Icha Icha books to read. A knock on the door snapped him out of his thoughts.

"Enter!" The elderly Hokage said.

"Good morning Hokage jiji. You wanted to see me." Naruto said, as gave a cheeky smile.

"Ah good morning Naruto-kun. How are you doing this morning?" The Sandaime Hokage asked as he put down his pipe.

"I'm great this morning jiji. I had my morning ramen, and one of your Anbu paid for my meal. But I don't think he's going to be happy about it." Naruto said while scratching the back of his head. He was about to continue speaking. When out of nowhere the Anbu appeared kneeling in front of the Sandaime Hokage.

"Hokage-sama I'm sorry for my tardiness." The bird masked Anbu said while kneeling.

"Report" The Hokage said as he made himself more comfortable for the following headache.

"Hokage-sama when I left to retrieve Uzumaki-san, he was about to start eating his ramen. When I pass down the message to him." The bird mask Anbu said but was quickly interrupted by Naruto.

"Oi, oi, Hokage-jiji I told him I would have come on my own after I finished eating my ramen. Then he threatened me by using force. So to teach him a lesson, I pulled a prank on him. I left him with my bill to pay. And I came as fast as possible before he tried to hurt me." Naruto said as he huffed and crossed his arm and pouted.

The Hokage's office began to fill with killing intent, making the temperature drop. The bird mask Anbu began to sweat from the killing intent emitting from the Sandaime Hokage. This time in a commanding voice the Sandaime asked "Tori, finish your report."

"Hai Hokage-sama, after I told him I would bring him by force. He asked me to pay his bill and took off to the Hokage tower. I was left dumbfounded before I realized I was left to pay the bill. I was about to leave but the owner of the stand stopped me. I asked him for the bill amount, to my shocking horror, I had to pay 1,500 ryo. I paid the man then asked isn't one bowl of ramen was too much, he said and I quote."

"Who said he ate one bowl of ramen?"

"I was afraid to ask how many he ate before I got there." Tori said as a tick mark started to appear. So I asked how many bowls Uzumaki-san ate? The answer made me go pale, he told me he ate ten bowls." The bird masked Anbu finished reporting to the Sandaime.

"I see." Said the Sandaime as he let out another sigh. "Tori, please don't threaten Naruto-kun again, do you understand! And I'll reimburse you for your troubles" The Hokage said with a voice full of authority.

"Hai Hokage-sama ! And thank you." Anbu said kneeling with his hand in a fist over his heart. The Sandaime only way it off, like it was no problem.

"Naruto-kun the reason I asked for you to come was I heard reports that some mischief has befallen the village. Who or what could have done that?" The Sandaime Hokage asked as he stared at the young blond carefully.

Naruto started to feel the sweat building on his forehead. All the while Naruto was feeling the pressure, knowing he had to admit to his jiji. He was the one that created all the chaos in the early hours. Naruto could never lie to his jiji. Since his jiji is the one person other than the Ichiraku's to treat him well. And because of that Naruto doesn't like to disappoint his jiji. He always tells him the truth. The one thing that terrifies him is for his jiji to abandon him.

"Well you see Hokage-jiji, the other day the villagers were treating me badly. They tried to give me rotten food. Then a few of them tried to attack me, luckily I was able to protect myself. I ended up pulling a prank on them on the spot. I didn't hurt anyone, just immobilize them. I knew if I hurt them people would try harder to kill me." Naruto explained to the Hokage.

"I see." Said the elderly Hokage.

"Naruto-kun, when and how did you manage to put this prank together in such a small amount of time?" The Sandaime Hokage asked as he took another puff of his pipe.

"Well Hokage-jiji I had that plan ready to play out for about one year. As for your other question jiji. Throughout the day I was setting certain things up. And during the night sky, I was able to finish wiring and putting down a secondary trap. Man I wish I could of seen their faces." Naruto said with a sheepish grin while rubbing the back of his head.

"By the way, jiji just to let you know I have many other plans to prank the village. If I need to make my point come across." Naruto said as he looked at the Hokage with a wry smile.

After hearing the young blond explain why he did what he did. Sandaime listened how he was able to create the plan and how. Hokage was left rubbing his temples and the future paperwork this kid could cause if not looked after properly. Then he curses the young blond father for never telling the secret to finishing his paperwork in a timely fashion.

"Naruto-kun, are you ready to start the academy in a week's time? The Sandaime Hokage asked, giving a warm smile.

"Jiji, I'm really excited to become a ninja. Then I could do super cool jutsu just like the Hokage. Then the village would have to acknowledge my existence." Naruto said before he paused for a moment and spoke again. "Alright jiji I know what I want to do when I grow up. I'm going to become Hokage!" As he proclaimed while he fist pumped his little fist in the air.

The Sandaime Hokage had an amused look on his face. As he watched the young blond proclamation.

"Your parents would be proud of you Naruto-kun. Now show me how strong is your Will of Fire." The Sandaime Hokage thought to himself.

"Naruto-kun I hope you understand that I'm not able to spend much time with you. But I do want you to know that I care for you. So how about this, I will teach you certain skills that most people don't know how to do. It might be boring at first. But you would become one of the most powerful ninja ever to live." The elderly Hokage said, giving Naruto a warm smile.

"Alright Hokage-jiji I will try my best not to disappoint you." The excited blond said as he was jumping around the office. "Would it be alright for me to go jiji." Naruto asked The Sandaime while giving him a true smile.

"You may Naruto-kun" The Sandaime excuse the boy

As Naruto left the office, the Anbu was waiting for his next instruction to obey. All this time he waited for the Hokage to either dismiss him. So he can get back to his duties. But it seems like the Hokage forgot about him.

"Tori, please refrain yourself for threatening Naruto-kun again please." Sandaime said as he let out another puff of smoke.

"Hai Hokage-sama." Tori said while still kneeling.

"You may leave now." The Hokage said Then the Anbu vanished in a swirl of leaves.

The Sandaime Hokage thought to himself. "Damn what a troublesome day. I'm getting too old for this shit!"

At the Nara Compound

Whack, whack, smack, "oh-w-w-w ouch!" both father and son said in unison.

"Can either one of you help out around the house every one in a while. Yoshino yells out angry at both her husband and son.

Both father and son were rubbing their heads when they stopped all of a sudden. Looking at one another both said at the same time troublesome.

"Someone powerful is using our clan's famous phrase "how troublesome." Shikaku said while still rubbing his head.

"Would that be more of the line of plagiarizing our phrase" Shikamaru said as he rubbed his head as well.

"The only thing you lazy man needs to remember is mercy" Yoshino Nara said to both her husband and child.

"How troublesome!" said by both males the another whack and smack was heard.

On Naruto's way home

Naruto hurried to his secret home. While most people in the village knew where he lived. Villager and ninja alike vandalized his apartment. And sometimes when he was a little kid. He would get beatings in his place left for dead.

But ever since he found his second home. He would go to his apartment from time to time. Just to make people think he was still living there. He quickly stopped by Ichiraku's to pick up some ramen for dinner before going home.

On his way to his secret home. He would constantly look around his surroundings. Just in case prying eyes saw his whereabouts. He had to make sure that his secret entrance would never be found. He would purposely run in zig-zags. Be able to confuse anyone that was following him.

After a few minutes he got to the edge of the river. The Naka river was the only river that went through the Uchiha Clan Compound and out the village. So he hopped off the edge of the river bank, near a huge tree. When he landed on a flat rocky area with dirt. He moved the vegetation he was using to cover the main entrance to his secret home.

When he crawled through he quickly began to climb up the inner hollowed part to a section. Where he moved again more vegetation he was using to block the view of the actual tunnel. Naruto lost himself in thought. How the last few years he's been happy since he found his new place. Compared to his rundown apartment he occasionally lives in nowadays.

(Flashback)

A four year old Naruto was walking back home. After eating his dinner at Ichiraku's. Whenever he had a chance to eat ramen, it made him forget all about his troubled life.

As he walked down a dark road, he was passing an alley. When all of a sudden someone grabbed him, pulled him violently into the dark alley. Little Naruto tried to struggle free. But was quickly knocked out cold.

When Naruto finally woke up, he found himself in a wheat sack. He started to feel afraid of what might happen to him. And on top of that he didn't know where he was being taken.

He heard voices and they were talking about him. And how they are going to get rid of him. Now Naruto was fearing for the worst thing possible. And he knew most people in the village would rather see him dead.

"Natsu, we are almost there, it's a good place to hide all evidence." The unknown person said with words full of confidence.

"Koyo, Shut up! And keep it down. We can't let anyone find out what we have done. Otherwise the Hokage will execute us." Natsu said in a low voice looking to see if there were any witnesses.

The two ninja's came up to a dark forest area, where there was a ravine water current taking it out of the village. That is what Naruto heard the men say attempting to end his life. His only thoughts were of the only people that care for him flash through his mind.

And then he felt great pain piercing his little body. He was stabbed three times before he knew it. He let out a cry of pain, before falling unconscious again. The chunins threw him off the ravine and hoped never to see the demon brat again.

The cries were heard by some Anbu patrol. When they got to the area they heard the Anbu found the two chunin asked them their reason for being in this part of the forest. The two chunin told them they were chasing a thief, and last saw him in this part of the forest. The Anbu asked for their names and asked a few more questions. When the two gave them their names, and got all the necessary information. Once the Anbu were satisfied they shunshin in a swirl of leaves. Freaked out from the close call the two chunins left the forest.

When the chunin's toss Naruto in the ravine. He hit the water hard and started to float down the Naka River. As he was floating down the current. The wheat sack got caught on a root of an extended tree. Some time passed while Naruto was still unconscious in the water. The little blond was fortunate not to drown.

When little Naruto finally awoke and began to regain consciousness. He thought everything that happened last night, was just a horrible nightmare. The nightmare felt so real, he thought he was about to die. The feeling of getting stabbed and then thrown into the ravine, was a very troubling thought.

Once little Naruto was able to shake the cobwebs. He immediately felt the pain in three parts of his little body. He was about to touch the painful areas. When he noticed that he was wet, and numb all over his body. He realized that he was still in a wheat sack.

Naruto began to get himself out of the bag. But at the same time he felt the pain on his hand. Thinking of escaping and getting to a warm place. He struggled for a time before finally he was able to get free, and grabbed on a tree root. Little Naruto was able to pull himself up on the little flat surface.

He immediately went to lay down on the sun part. Then he closed his eyes and fell asleep again. Little Naruto woke up a few hours later, and looked around to see where he was at. He started to move closer to the tree. So he would be able to climb out of the bank.

When he discovered a metal looking object by some overgrown roots. It looked like it was hiding a hole or den of some type. Little Naruto, being curious, went to see what it was. When he saw the item he got excited. It was a ninja weapon, a knife looking thing. He thought it was so cool.

Naruto tried to wiggle himself through the roots. But he was not able to. Then with his new found weapon. He began to cut, enough of the roots to let him slip in. After a lot of effort Naruto was finally able to accomplish his goal.

Naruto entered the den by crawling. When he stood up and looked around, he was in awe. The was mostly hollow on one side. It looked like someone worked on it for years. But it didn't look like any adults worked on this. While Naruto was looking around, something caught his attention.

He quickly noticed a hole a few feet above his head. So he decided to investigate the new hole. He began to climb, using some of the roots. When he finally reached the hole. He decided to enter it and see where that would lead him too.

When Naruto entered the hole he felt a little scared. As he crawled into the darkness. The hole began to light up. He saw that the light was coming from an emblem looking design. It looked like a spiral swirl.

Little Naruto became more curious, so kept crawling forward down the tunnel. After a few minutes when he got to the end of the hole. Naruto's mouth fell agape, it was a complete surprise what he discovered.

When he was done being shocked. Naruto climbed down and started to look around the place.

All he could do and look in awe at all the things that he found there. He found a work area to read and draw weird kanji seals that he didn't understand. As he kept looking around he found a bunch of cool weapons and other things. All of a sudden his eyes saw a pair of beds. He walked over to get a feel for them and to his amazement the bed was very comfortable. Once he was done testing the sleeping area he walked over to the dresser. He was surprised to have found some scrolls in one drawer. In the other drawer he found some clothes. Everything seems to be a little big to fit him properly. But he could work with that. Everything looked like it was in good condition. After looking around and getting used to the place. Naruto decided this would be his new home away from home.

(Flashback End)

After reminiscing for a few minutes. Naruto got to the old tree, and climbed down to the entrance. Then he crawled a few yards, before it became a walkable space.

Naruto enters his home and walks over to the makeshift kitchen. Took out a scroll and poured some chakra and in a puff of smoke. They had a few bowls of ramen for dinner. Then he called for his secret guardian. "Shisui-sensei, I'm back and I brought lunch.

A/N: Well I hope everyone enjoys the story. If anyone is interested in being a beta reader for me I would appreciate it just PM me. Reviews would also be appreciated.