Conversations we never had.

These characters never had these conversations, but, oh, if only they had …

(I have five chapters planned so far ...)

.

1) Arya – Catelyn: "I don't want to be a lady"

Catelyn had been looking for her daughter all morning. After the family breakfast, both girls had been sent to their respective rooms to get dressed and ready for their lessons, but while Sansa had joined Septa Mordane in her language lecture, Arya was nowhere to be found. Knowing her daughter's knack for disappearing and skipping lessons, Catelyn knew not to be so terribly worried about her whereabouts. Yet, after checking in the usual places where Arya would normally venture and coming up empty handed, Catelyn was starting to feel more concerned.

"There you are!" the mother exclaimed after spotting the young girl in one of the stables. She had her back to the entrance and was dancing, ducking and jumping facing a stack of hay by the corner. "What are you doing here? You were supposed to join your sister and the girls for your lessons. Beth told me you skipped the singing session again."

"I can't sing" came the feeble reply in between heaving and panting. Apparently she had been at this exercise long enough for her body to feel the exhaustion.

Catelyn walked up to her daughter and upon closer inspection she realized what it was that had Arya so focused.

"Is that your dancing partner?" she asked pointing at the heap of hay in front of the girl.

Arya had built a dummy by covering a mountain of hay with an old shirt and placing a hat on top.

Caught red-handed, the girl turned around and looked sheepishly at her mother. "No" she said faintly.

Signalling at the wooden sword in her daughter's hand Catelyn pried further. "Is that how you intend to woo the boy? You know the idea of capturing their hearts is not meant to be taken literally" she raised her eyebrows and pursed her lips.

"Well, I'm not going to capture a boy with my singing" she shrugged. "I'm never getting a boy at all!"

"What makes you say so?"

"I can't sing" Arya replied ducking and thrusting forwards with her sword at the dummy.

"Not if you don't practice."

"I don't want to practice. I don't want to learn. I hate language. I hate singing. I hate poetry. I hate numbers. I hate sewing", she emphasized every utterance with a powerful thrust at the hay dummy.

"And I suppose that poor boy over there is responsible for your tragic situation so you feel the need to hack him to pieces" her mother teased her.

"Well, at least he doesn't pester me" Arya replied sending a side-eyed glare at her mother.

"Do I pester you?"

"Yes!" she breathed out. "No. Well. A bit."

"Because I'm a pain and it is my joy in life to make you to suffer" her mother offered.

"No. Well, sometimes."

"Who else pesters you?"

"Sansa!" she replied offhandedly. "Sometimes" she added tilting her head sideways. "And Robb. And father sometimes. And Jon and Bran too. Oh, and Septa Mordane. Definitely, Septa Mordane."

"And do you think we all want you to suffer and that's why we pester you?" When she saw the conflicted look on her daughter's face, she stepped forwards, sat on the floor and patted the ground next to her signalling for her daughter to sit next to her. "Come".

"I'm training" Arya shook her head.

"Show me."

Arya looked at her mother in confusion. "You want to see me training?"

"Well, I can't see you practising any other skill or studying any other subject, so I might as well settle for this one."

Arya started balancing on her feet, thrusting forwards with her sword, slicing sideways and hacking downwards.

"You're good. But when you attacked his right side, you left your head exposed." Arya looked at her mother open-mouthed, surprise showing in her face. "I've seen your father and the boys train long enough to have picked a few hints here and there" she explained.

"How come I never get to train with them?"

"Would you like to?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed. "I hate my lessons. I don't learn anything valuable. It's just words and mind numbing idle activities. Nothing useful. I don't want to be useless, like Sansa."

"Do you consider me useless?"

"No."

"I know how to sing, that's how I used to get you and your siblings to sleep when you were young. That's how I used to entertain guests at Riverrun when my father held meetings with his bannermen. I can sew, that's how I mend all your clothes that for some mysterious reason just keep tearing. And that's how I made you and your siblings your first cloak when you were babies. I know my numbers, that's how I help your father with inventories and help run the castle. That's how I used to help my father, too. But I was not born knowing those things. I had to study and practice. Just like you need to practice."

"But you like it! I don't!"

"I learned to like it."

"How can I learn to like something I'm horrible at? Septa Mordane is always criticizing my stitching and my language and my painting and my singing. I can't do anything right. And Sansa is perfect."

"She's not perfect. She's just-" but she was swiftly cut off by her daughter.

"Yes, she is. Everybody says so. Septa Moradne said so and she says I'm horrible!"

"Did she really say that?" Catelyn asked with concern.

"Yes! Well, not exactly in those words. But she never praises me and she only sees my faults."

"I'll talk to her. But the only way to improve is by practicing. It's like this sword of yours. The only way to get better is by training and going to your lessons."

"I hate it. I hate being a girl" she pouted.

"Come here, sit" Catelyn patted the ground next to her again. "There are many things that I like. And that I liked when I was a girl. I couldn't do them all, but I did enough. And there were many things I didn't like, but I had to do them nonetheless."

"For example?"

"Wiping your vomit when you were a baby!" Catelyn teased her.

"Well, that's you job as a mother" Aray returned the banter.

"Exactly. It's my responsibility, so I did it."

"Mhh"

"What is it that you like and that you want to do?"

"I like playing and being outside and training with a sword and with the bow. But I can't do that because I have to go to the stupid lessons. I don't want to be a Lady and get married and run a castle and clean baby's vomit. I wish I were a boy. A poor boy with no stupid lessons."

"I see" Catelyn nodded. "Because you hate your life. You hate sleeping in a soft bed with warm blankets. You hate it when we sit by the fireplace and tell stories. And I know you loathe the sweet cakes we had today for breakfast. And it's even worse when you have all the time to play with your siblings. I know, I have seen your face. I know how much you detest it when you and Bran chase each other around the gardens. And not to mention your awful clothes which are always clean and mended, and how you get new clothes when you outgrow your old ones. Yes, I completely understand. You wish you were a poor boy who had to get up at the crack of dawn, gulp down a glass of milk with a meagre loaf of bread, go work in the stables picking up manure wearing pants and shifts which may not be warm enough for the weather and whose sleeves you have outgrown. It's a great life, working from the moment the sun comes up until the sun goes down with no time to play. If that's the kind of life you want, we can ask your father to send you to Wintertown. Don't worry sweetling, I'll speak to him today. By tomorrow you'll be free of the yoke your life is." Catelyn finished and started to get on her feet.

"What?" asked a very confused Arya.

"Do you like your life?" Catelyn sat down again next to her daughter.

"Yes" she replied hesitantly. "But I don't like the stupid lessons."

"These are the things we need to do. The price we pay for our benefits. When I was your age I loved playing outside. My sister, my brother, and a ward we had, he was a dear friend. The four of us would go into the forest, we would go for a swim in the river, we would ride horses. I had a lot of fun. But I also attended my lessons. All my lessons, the ones I liked and the ones I didn't. And I had to help my father run the castle. My mother died when I was a little girl, so I had to take care of my younger siblings. You don't have that added responsibility. All you have to do is go to your lessons."

"We have too many lessons."

"No you don't. You just need to manage your time. I found time for everything. Yes, I had to give up things I enjoyed. But I also made sure I enjoyed what I did. As highborn, we have many perks, but we also have many duties."

"Mhh"

"One of those duties is knowing how to run a house. For that you need numbers and language. Why don't you try to express the way you feel in words instead of hacking away at a poor hay boy with an old shirt riddled with holes" she pointed at the hay dummy for effect. "Learn how to express yourself well and you'll be able to draft peace treaties and trading negotiations. Learn your numbers and your House will flourish. Learn how to sew and you will be able to mend the clothes you want without having to resort to other people. Learn how to sing and you'll be able to entertain valuable guests in your house and, more importantly, make your children happy. Life is full of challenges for us to face. The key lies in how you deal with those challenges."

Arya stayed quiet for a while, pondering what her mother had just said.

"Will I have to marry?"

"Yes, eventually. But it doesn't have to be a bad thing."

"What if I don't like him? What if he's stupid?"

"Many men are stupid. Many women too. But most of them are good. Look at your father and I. When we married we didn't love each other. In fact, we didn't even know each other. I had been betrothed to a dashing young knight, handsome, full of life, who could sing and tell jokes, and who would take me riding in Riverrun. And look who I ended up with?" she smiled with complicity. "A dull boring man with a serious face" she winked. "And what about your father? He was free and had all his life ahead of him. Yet, he was suddenly stuck with being a Lord, Warden of the North and had to marry this boring southron girl he'd never met. Terrible isn't is?"

"Now you're just being silly."

"Am I? Do you think I wanted to marry your father? Do you think he wanted to marry me?" she shook her head. "But we had to do it. It was our duty. I suppose we could have refused. He could have run away to Essos and become an explorer of fantastic exotic lands and I could have roamed the countryside watching sunsets on the lakes and mountains. But our families would have suffered for it. Your father was the last heir to House Stark since Benjen was too young. If we wanted to win the war we had to band together: Stark and Tully to defeat the Mad King. If we hadn't done our duty the Rebellion would have never succeeded. We did our duty. But we found a way to like it. Your father and I married for duty but became a couple for love. I can't imagine my life without him now, and I'm pretty sure he can't imagine his without me. We built a beautiful life and had four beautiful children."

"Five" she corrected her.

"Oh, yes, I keep forgetting about this girl who's just a pain. Can't remember her name now, but she's always running around and … Ouch!" Catelyn feigned a painful groan when her daughter hit her playfully on her head with the wooden sword.

"So if I go to my lessons I will have your life?"

"Is that so bad?"

"I suppose it isn't. I just wish they were not so boring, or that I was better at them." Arya conceded begrudgingly.

"Let's make a deal. You can skip singing for now. And I'll talk to your father about getting you sword fighting training lessons. But you have to promise that you will try your best at all the other lessons, not just the ones you like."

"I promise."

"Remember this Arya, as highborn, we have lots of benefits most people don't have. We have people who help make our lives comfortable. But we also have a responsibility to those people and to our families. You can't have the perks without the duties. The only duty you have for now is to attend your lessons. And don't worry about Septa Mordane. I'll talk to her. She's a good woman and she loves you, but I'll talk to her to make sure she praises you too when you make an effort. Can we have a deal?" Catelyn extended her hand to her daughter.

"Deal" the girl replied shaking her mother's hand.

"Now, go hack away that pestering boy before I make you marry him" Catelyn said with her finger pointing at the unfortunate heap of hay and sat back to watch her daughter revel in an activity she enjoyed doing.