What's this? A third story? Am I an idiot for trying to write three stories at the same time? Most definitely. But that's not gonna stop me, ahaha!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and Highschool DxD

"Listen up, kid! We've got a year left for this training trip and—"

"Training trip? You've spent the past two years perving on women in the hot springs, going to brothels and bars. Plus, you leave me in a hotel room for most of the day reading over your dumb books"

"Awww! Does the little brat want a taste of the wonders that is the female body? My books, which are glorious, aren't enough to satiate your adolescent mind?"

"Your books are trash—"

Jiraiya gasped, "You have no idea what you're talking about! Y'know why?"

"Don't care." Naruto rolled his eyes and continued walking.

"Because you're uncultured! That's why!"

"If you say so, Pervy Sage."

Jiraiya growled, "That's it!" He grabbed his student by the collar and started walking back to where they came from.

"What gives?!" Naruto flailed his arms.

"We're going back to the nearest town and I'm throwing you inside a brothel!"

"What?! Why?!"

"For the wonders of the female body, why else?" Jiraiya laughed boisterously.

"You pervy old man! I know the wonders of the female body!"

"Oh? You do, do you?"

"Yeah! But I'm not going around peeping on women and having sex whenever I feel like it! I have morals."

Jiraiya rolled his eyes, "Kid, you're a virgin and therefore everything you're spouting is bullshit."

"You can't force me to have intercourse with a sex worker!"

"Then I'll drug you into it!"

"What?!" Naruto's eyes bulged out, "That's way worse!"

"Don't care! Clearly I've been teaching you wrong if you're this against it, and I intend to correct that."

"You asked for this!" Naruto reared his leg back and kicked at his unsuspecting godfather's groin from behind.

"Ffffffffuuuuuu—" He collapsed, holding his family jewels.

Naruto nodded to himself, and walked nonchalantly into the forest, "I'm gonna take a leak, be right back."

"You're… gonna regret… that, kid." Jiraiya sat up in pain.

He took slow and deep breaths, "Think happy thoughts, happy thoughts…"

A few minutes passed and he finally got up.

"What's taking so long brat? That's the longest piss anyone has ever taken I reckon." He grumbled.

"Ummmm, I found a strange scroll…" Naruto scratched his head as he came out of the forest.

"What's it say?" Jiraiya limped towards him.

"I'm not sure… Something about a portal, chakra, other world… It's very hard to understand." He handed the scroll to his teacher.

Jiraiya hummed, "Who knows what it does… Let's find out!"

He set down the scroll with a grin.

Naruto looked at the man giggling uncomfortably.

"All right… I assume if I just apply this amount of chakra."

Naruto yawned as the minutes passed and Jiraiya continued fiddling with the scroll.

"Hmmm."

"What is it now?" Naruto rolled his eyes.

"I want you to apply your chakra into this.

"Why?"

"The scroll requires an insane amount of chakra as I'm just finding out…" Jiraiya groaned.

"If you say so." Naruto kneeled down next to him, "If we die, I'm blaming you."

"Yeah yeah, get to it." His godfather waved him off.

A few minutes passed and the scroll began to glow.

"Aha! It's working!"

Both men stood up and looked at the scroll curiously as the glow died down.

"Well that was a waste of chakra."

"Give it a second, kid. We can't be sure yet."

"What do you want to happen? For some portal to open from beneath our feet and swallow us whole?"

Jiraiya rolled his eyes, "Don't be so dramatic, kid. Of course that's not going to happen."

…

And that's exactly what happened.

"I definitely wasn't expecting this..."

"I told you we shouldn't have done anything with it!"

"I get it, you're smart and I'm dumb. Want a lollipop?"

Naruto rolled his eyes, "Where even are we?"

"An alley."

"I can see that..."

"Then why'd you ask?"

"I— Everything's pretty loud. Think there's some kind of parade going on?"

"Don't know... Stay behind me."

"Now you're paranoid?"

"Let's go up to the roof, we'll get a better vantage point."

For them to say they were shocked at what they saw was an understatement.

"Definitely not a parade..."

"No shit, kid... No use having our jaws on the floor though, let's go get a bite. Put on a transformation." Jiraiya said as he made his way down the side of the building.

"Okay..." Naruto followed after him, barely being able to take his eyes away from the street ahead of them. "I saw a ramen stand, can we get some?"

"I want to find a bar."

"I'm a minor."

"Don't whine, it's not like you're gonna be drinking."

"I want ramen though."

"Fineeee."

"Awesome!"

"You're paying though."

Naruto groaned, "Fineeee."

Not sure how often I'll be updating this but the next chapter will be coming out soon. I should probably sleep though... Hope this caught your attention somewhat.