Cap glanced at her, surprise blatantly working it's way through him. Natasha just gave her a respectful nod and Scott Lang...he choked slightly on his drink. Tony inclined his head towards the empty chair beside him. Shaking her head, Aubrey settled on leaning against the railing, voice sounding more hostile than she meant it to.
"You can't just throw words around like these...especially not these kinds of words."
"Just hear us out...Scott figured something out" Natasha held her gaze before nodding her head to him.
"Alright...yeah...um-" he paused, clearing his throat and starting again. "- Essentially...in as few words possible...I think we can go back in time and bring back the stones we need...using the Quantum realm. I was stuck there for five years but for me, it was five minutes. But we need...we need someone who knows more about this." His eyes turned to Tony. His news worked its way through her and slowly, she sunk into the chair, processing.
"You...You mean that we...we could fix this. Is it even possible?... Tony?"
He wouldn't meet her eyes as he spoke.
"Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck scale which triggers the Deutsch Proposition. Can we agree on that?... In layman's terms, it means you're not coming home."
"I did" Lang cut in
"No, you accidentally survived. It's a billion to one cosmic fluke….and now you want to pull a...What do you call it?" Tony pushed out of his chair and handed Cap a drink.
"A..Uhm….A time heist?" Lang looked proud of the name.
"Yeah...a time heist...of course. Why didn't we think of this before? Oh! Because it's laughable….Because it's a pipe dream."
Aubrey stood, sidling to stand beside Natasha as she cut in. "The stones are in the past, Tony. Theoretically.. We could get them, bring them back-"
"And snap our fingers" Black Widow nodded her head as she finished Aubrey's sentence.
"There's one keyword in that sentence….Theoretically. It's a theory. You can create theories all day but it will only get you so far-" Tony paused, moving to stand directly in front of her, a serious look on his face. "-You, Aubrey, of all people would understand my next words. I can't lose what I've found."
"You mean Morgan" she murmured, hugging herself.
"This could screw it up worse than he already has. You know I wish we could bring everyone back but this isn't a logical or tangible way to safely execute said time heist. I believe our most likely outcome would be...our collective demise." The last words came quietly and she saw in his eyes how much fear had come with their theory.
But she wanted it to be true...so much. And he saw that in return, eyes finding hers. In them, she saw how sorry he was.
"But...but what if we follow the rules of time travel. That means no talking to our past selves, no betting on sporting events.-"
"I'm going to stop you right there, Scott.-" Tony's voice hardened again as he turned back to the group. "-Are you seriously telling me that your plan to save the universe is based on Back to the Future? Is it?"
Lang scoffed, shaking his head "No."
"Good because you had me worried there. Cause that would be horsecrap. That's not how Quantum Physics works.-"
"Tony-" Natasha started "- We have to take a stand."
"We did stand...and yet here we are"
Aubrey felt anger rise up even though she knew Tony refused for a reason. But if there was even a chance? He was wrong. He needed to try. She opened her mouth to say something but Lang beat her to it.
"Look, I know you got a lot on the line, a wife, a daughter. But I lost someone very important to me…. A lotta people did. And now….now we have a chance to bring her back...bring everyone back and you're telling us that you won't even...-" his voice rose with every word and anger glowed in his eyes as Tony cut him off.
"That's right, Scott. I won't even. I can't" His words were quiet as familiar footsteps sounded behind them. Morgan jumped into her father's arms, saying
"Mommy told me to come to save you."
"Good job, I'm saved. I wish you were here to come ask me something else...anything else. I'm honestly happy to see you guys. I just….oh look the table's set for six." he started to walk towards the door, Morgan still in his arms but Cap stopped him
"Tony….I get it. And I'm happy for you...I really am. But this is a second chance."
"I got my second chance right here, Cap. Can't roll the dice on it. If you don't talk shop you can stay for lunch." and with that, he went back inside. Three pairs of eyes turned to Aubrey as she tiredly rubbed her temples.
"He's wrong.-" Lang started, sucking in a breath to say more but Aubrey held up her other hand, giving him a fierce look.
"He's scared…..and...and has so much to lose. I don't agree with him...not one bit but...I can see where he's coming from...I just-" she paced to the railing and looked out over the yard. "-I just wish he'd try."
"We all do,-" Cap's voice came closer as he stood beside her. Receding footsteps sounded as Natasha and Lang headed back towards the car. Cap glanced at Aubrey before continuing "- I miss him too. I miss a lot of people."
"Cap...this isn't a conversation you want to have with me. My head is so full of crap and anger...it's just not a good idea"
"Sometimes...even though we don't want to talk about it….It helps. I know you can't talk to Tony about him so...If you ever need to talk...I'd like to listen."
Something inside her splintered...a mental block that had been carefully put up to help stop the towering emotion. Leaning onto her elbows and tracing the wood grain with her eyes, quiet words escaped from Aubrey's mouth, each one laced with the regrets that swirled around in her mind from day to day. "I forget...sometimes...that he's not here. It's like when...we first got away from Hydra….we'd forget where we were. It's like that…but...worse."
He silently nodded, pain flashing in his eyes. Somehow he knew that she had more to say and waited patiently as the rest of the words tore their way out.
"There are so many things I wish I'd said...And now I'll never get to say them….Because he's gone."
"I could tell you that you're going to be okay and that you'll move on...but that's not how it works and I think you've figured that out by now. However, Aubrey, I can tell you that he felt the same way you did and he'd feel better knowing that you are here with the Starks. Just before the fight in Wakanda, he said 'Steve, if it's me or her, choose her. She'll be okay..she's strong. I...I couldn't do it without her...she doesn't think she could do it but she can. Stark would take care of her...one of you would.' That's what he said Aubrey. He knew you'd be okay."
"But this isn't okay...how can this ever be okay? Am I destined to be here for the rest of my life? Wondering what it would've been like with him!" Anger rose in every word and she tried to keep from shouting but the last words echoed around the clearing as she frantically tried to push the loss away.
Cap heaved a sigh, his shoulders dropping "I wish I could answer that question…..There's a support group that I meet with, once or twice a week. We're meeting tonight and you're more than welcome to come."
"I...I'll think about it...Thank you, Cap...for lending an ear" She walked him to the edge of the porch.
"I told you, you'll feel better" he gave her a sad smile before getting into the passenger seat. Aubrey turned towards the house, not wanting to watch the chance for redemption drive away.
That was how she found herself standing on the doorstep of a run-down church with trembling hands. She hadn't wanted to come but somehow she'd just...ended up there. Puffing a breath out of her lips, Aubrey pulled open the door and went in. Dust particles floated in the air and she followed the signs to a room with chairs situated in a circle. Cap stood off to the side, speaking to a woman in a black sweatshirt. Several more people were littered around the room. Some spoke to others and some sat quietly, hands folded tight. At the sight of her, he excused himself and made his way over.
"Aubrey...you came" He sounded surprised
"I...wasn't going to but Uhm...somehow I just ended up here" She shrugged, fiddling with a hairband. It was her replacement for playing with a throwing knife or star. Pepper had confiscated them the moment she'd returned, instead, supplying her nervous ticks with putty and toys made for fidgeting. Several were in the small backpack she carried, along with what Pepper had taken to calling the Panic bag. It had an emergency phone, a bar of chocolate, picture of her family...and two EpiPen sedatives.
Cap's voice pulled her from her mind "I'm glad you're here, you can introduce yourself or find a chair. We'll be starting soon."
She nodded, all words disappearing from her brain. Aubrey made her way to a chair and slid into it, taking in the surroundings. Twelve people, including herself, milled around. Chairs sat stacked in the corner, a film of dust covering them. Inspirational posters lined the walls and she could make out a few of them in the dimly lit room. Cap sat in his chair and the others must've taken it as a sign that it was starting because soon everyone was seated. Aubrey could feel their stares burning into her but she kept her gaze trained on Cap and her mind focused on his words.
"First, let me say how glad I am that everyone came today...you may also notice that we have someone new with us tonight. If you want to introduce yourself, Aubrey, with your name, age, and favorite thing to do right now."
Sucking in a breath, she nodded, glancing around the group "My name is Aubrey Cristo...I'm..I'm thirty-four...and my favorite thing...my favorite thing is to spend time with Morgan...my friend's daughter...She's five and...just amazing." She stopped there and various murmurs of welcome sounded before Cap took back over.
"Thank you, Aubrey. We'll start today's session with a recap of how everyone is doing, who'd like to go first?"
The woman beside her raised a hand and began a moment later. She looked to be in her early thirties and Aubrey felt oddly comforted by the familiar air of grief the woman had.
"I'm Christina...and my week...it was...it was hard.-" she paused, wiping her eyes "- Yesterday would've been my husband and son-in-law's birthday...My daughter came over...and..and we cried together over poorly made cake. We lit candles for them and….it was hard.." Christina paused, sucking in a breath "- But I'm just so thankful that I have my daughter and I'm not alone."
"That's good, that you see that and acknowledge it. I'm glad you have each other to lean on...some people don't have that" Cap's eyes flashed to Aubrey for a split second before he asked who wanted to go next. Each person took a turn and soon...too soon, she was the only one who hadn't shared.
"Aubrey? You don't have to share if you don't want to."
"I..I'll try to-" Pausing, and rolling her shoulders, Aubrey got her thoughts in order. "-Uhm...So...without going into detail...I...I lost everyone. My whole family was...is...gone and...my best friend left me too...I...I've always struggled with keeping my mind out of the darkness but it's been really...really hard. I've been staying with a friend and his family...which has helped but….Sometimes I feel like I'm drowning. There's nothing I have to turn to...no job..not one that I want to ever go near again...Where do I go from here?" She felt tears rising and heaved a breath, wondering how she could've just blurbed her thoughts to so many strangers.
Christina gently put her cold hand on Aubrey's leg, tears shining in her eyes. "The only place left to go is up."
Cap nodded with her words, adding onto them
Tony Stark fell backward into his chair, face frozen in astonishment.