DISCLAIMER: THIS CHAPTER TACKLES WEAK EMOTIONAL STATES AND ISN'T SUITED FOR EVERYONE. READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.
"Diana! Brace yourself!" I shouted at her while Diana planted her feet to the ground before soon getting headbutted by Bunni. She withstood it, sending her sliding closer to my position.
"Alright, Dragon Breath right in front of you!" I commanded.
"Dodge it, Bunni, with Quick Attack!" Hilda shouted back, as Bunni started to zig-zag from spot to spot, white pale light surrounding the Herdier. She dodged Diana's fire before bopping against Diana again, making her drop her to her knees.
She defiantly brought herself back up, ready to continue the fight, even though she was already way past her limit. Or at least from what I could tell with those ragged breaths and a small feeling at the back of my head that told me so.
"Alright, I'd say that's enough," I said, surprising Diana slightly before I gave her a small stare.
"You're past your limit, Diana. You should rest for now," I said to her, making her huff before, with a sigh, plopped on the ground from exhaustion.
I cleaned my temples free of sweat while drawing heavy breaths.
"I wouldn't have guessed Pokémon battles would be so exhausting," I contemplated before looking in Hilda's direction who was already leaning on a tree while also panting for air but still had her trademark smirk.
"What? Too tired to continue?" She said.
"Like you are one to talk," I shot back before sitting down next to Hilda who soon plopped on the ground with a dull thud. Since we both had little energy to do anything right now while our Pokémon were also taking a small nap, I took up the offer and leaned my head against my hands, the tree being impromptu support.
Hilda soon leaned on the tree as well while we both gazed at the afternoon sun shining in the distance behind a set of clouds. Its rays were rather easy to bear, making me smile at the sight.
"You know something, Hilda?" I suddenly asked her.
"What?" Was all she said.
"I remember we had a house in a small village with a breathtaking view. You could always go there and be greeted either by the sun or the stars, it didn't matter which," I reminisced while the smile I had became a little pained, "This view reminds me of that balcony."
Hilda then looked back at the view in front of us that was a little obscured by the trees but was still beautiful nonetheless.
"I'm honestly not one for sightseeing like this, I always like to keep my feet on the ground," She admitted before her lips curved upwards, "But I guess I can see where you're coming from."
She then turned back to me with a questioning look.
"What sparked your rant all of a sudden?" She asked, more curious than annoyed while my smile fully fell.
"I'm… scared, Hilda," I said to her while bringing my knees to my chest, "I'm scared that I won't find my way home."
"Don't worry, like Juniper said, somebody in Castelia should know something," She tried to reassure me, but I shook my head.
"But what if not?" I rebuked, taking Hilda back, "What if you said back on Route 3 was true? What if I'm… relying on a fake lifeline?"
Hilda wanted to say something, but her lips that were ready to speak formed into a thin line.
"Look," She started, prompting me to look at her, "I'm not gonna apologize for that again, we already sorted that out. But why are you scared in the first place? Wouldn't you want to just… stay here?"
That made me form a small snarl.
"Hilda, I think I already told you once that I need to go back," I said to her.
"Go back where? To a place where you were pretty much enslaved by your father?" She pointed out and my snarl deepened, "You said he trained you, but I feel like he did nothing more than forcefully cage you for his own benefit."
"Don't talk back to my father!" I snapped at her, "You don't know in what state he was and is in right now! He is dying, Hilda! And I'm the only one who can take over his business!"
Hilda, instead of backing off, matched my snarl.
"And that is supposed to be your problem!?" She yelled, "I get the fact that your father is dying, hell, mine died some time ago, but it feels like you are obligated to do something against your own will!"
"My father made me who I am right now, and spitting at what he had done for me is the last thing I'll do!"
"Well maybe you should, because what he did was nothing a father should do to his own children!"
"What do you know about raising a child!?"
"Probably a lot more than your father ever did!" That broke the camel's back. I immediately stood up before picking up Diana's pokéball and shooting the beam at her while she was playing with Tusky.
"This discussion is over," I stated before storming back to a Pokémon Center where we had our lodging. The pokéball in my hands shook in protest, making me clutch it tighter. After getting inside the center and finding my room, I closed the doors, before releasing a large groan.
"Who does she think she is!?" I said to myself while taking a seat on the bed and hiding my face within my arms, "I open up once or twice and that living cactus will only pin me instead!"
I stood up again and started to walk around while having a strong urge to just punch something really hard.
"My father is still out there, barely alive, and now she just decides that my father is at fault!?" With that shout, the pokéball in my hand forcefully opened to my shock, revealing Diana with quite a snarl on her face.
"Deino!?" She shouted at me.
"What!? I'm still mad here, Diana! Hilda was being a prick!" I yelled back.
"Dei! Deino!" She said challengingly, bopping her head in my direction.
"Me!? What does that have to do with me!? She was the one who just suddenly said that my father was in the wrong! How would you think I would react?!"
"Dei, no! Deino!"
"Go back inside your pokéball, I don't have the time nor the will for this, Diana," I said before launching another red beam from the pokéball, but to my shock, Diana dodged it.
"I said," I began with a forceful tone, "Get inside the pokéball."
"Deino!" She said defiantly.
"Fine, do whatever you want. I don't care, just leave me alone," I said, before laying on the bed, tired from this ordeal.
"Deino?" She asked.
"Don't talk to me now. Leave me be," I said tiredly. Diana slumped, lowering her head before turning away, finally giving me some time alone.
...Why did she say that? My father helped me to become who I am right now, so why would anyone question his method of raising me?
Maybe…
"No, there was no way he would do it out of selfishness," I thought, trying to reassure myself, but why was this anxiety clawing at me mercilessly? I brought my knees again into a fetal position before tears started to form.
God, why was my mind going to such places? Why would I ever have to question my father's affection?
"...I really hate you, Hilda."
{*}{*}{*}{*}{*}{*}
That prick!
How could he just bail out on me like that!? Maybe I could hold back on my words, but come on!
Tusky, being himself, came to me with a questioning look, curious about what happened.
"Axew?" He said while pointing at himself with his chubby arm.
"No, it's not your fault. I…" I actually had nothing to say about this. As much as I wanted to say sorry, my point still stood. It was only a matter of time before I would say anything anyway.
"Never mind," I said instead, "Come on, it's getting dark. We should head back."
I shoot the beam from the pokéball, calling back Tusky, before slowly but surely aimed for the Pokémon Center. Arceus above, I expected him to act all tough and stuff, but seeing him snap like that was a new one.
Was this how it felt when somebody else snapped at you instead?
I brought a single hand against my chest before clutching the fabric of my jacket, my knuckles turning white.
"What a way to make me feel bad," I muttered before reaching the center. It was a little too empty for my liking, but at least it was going to be quiet at night. Couldn't count how many times I wasn't able to sleep because of loud children.
After healing up my Pokémon, I aimed for the booked room we had for lodging. I had already called Lenora and said that I was going to challenge the gym and tomorrow was going to be the big fight.
I still thought that I was still lacking something that would give me an edge on the fight ahead, but I just didn't know what it was. I was honestly a little scared that I could lose.
Opening the doors to my room met me with a place that had everything I needed to sleep. It wasn't great by any means, but it did its job well enough. I kind of missed my mother's cooking, to be honest… and her banter a little too.
Arceus above, how long were we on this journey anyway? Only like two weeks, but still felt like a lifetime already.
I groaned loudly before deciding that a shower was going to help me ease a little. After stripping myself of my clothes, I turned the dial on and let the warm water wash all the grime and sweat I accumulated while battling Radko.
I scowled at the thought of him. Somehow, no matter what I did, he seemed to have a knack for battling that just made him better. Even though he had only Diana, he was on top of things and always in the lead.
Maybe I was approaching the battle the wrong way?
No, how could that be the case when Radko hadn't known about Pokémon for his whole life while I was the complete opposite? What made him special?
"Urgh, why are you so complicated to understand!" I shouted quietly, banging my fists against the white tiles of the shower, "And you still want to go back to that place and live under your father's shadow."
Screw this, thinking about him now just made me madder.
Turning the water off, I used one of the many towels the room provided to clean myself up, before I tackled my long hair. I swear, these things were more trouble than they were worth. Thankfully, I had my own comb stashed with me, because finding one that did its job right was way more difficult than it seemed.
Brushing through my still wet hair was a little difficult as a few strands still got caught inside my comb but that was inevitable. Didn't stop me from complaining though.
It was then I heard a small scratching noise coming from the doors into my room. I was caught off guard since both of my Pokémon were inside their pokéballs so who or what could it be?
I made a small turban out of the towel I had to keep my hair from getting greasy before putting on some reserved clothes and opening the doors revealing Radko's Diana, whimpering.
"Arceus above, what happened!?" I said immediately, caressing Diana's cheeks while her face downcast.
"Deino…" She said, before tilting her head towards the room Radko was in.
Ok, that was it! I could understand snapping at me, but Diana wasn't at fault at all!
I got more appropriate clothing this time before storming towards the doors leading to Radko's room. Diana gazed at me expectantly, wanting me to settle this, and I would be happy to oblige.
I was about to turn the nob, but a small and weak cry came from the other side that made me pause. I wasn't sure what it was at first so I leaned in with my ear, trying to make out what it was that sound was.
And I soon realized that Radko was actually crying behind these doors.
I slowly backed off from the doors, the slight guilt I felt when he left me on the route came back with a vengeance, making me clutch my clothing tightly. I clicked my tongue and I was about to touch the doorknob before stopping myself with my other hand.
"Deino?" She asked impatiently, making me turn to her regretfully.
"Look, Diana, maybe it would be better if we go to my room instead," I said barely above a whisper, and she perked up slightly.
"Dei?" She asked again. How could Radko pick up on anything she said was beyond me.
"I don't think he would want our company right now, if anything, I would make things worse," I explained to her in a somber tone before coming down to her level, patting her head, "You'll come with me for now, okay? We'll give Radko some space."
Diana tilted her head slightly before slowly but surely nodding. I nodded as well before leading Diana to my room while giving Radko's doors one last glance. I bit my lip, before locking the doors and let Diana pick a place to sleep.
Only for her to pick the bed itself.
I crossed my arms while staring at the Deino who already slumped on the sheets.
"Alright, I don't know what Radko lets you do, but you are not sleeping on the bed," I said sternly, making her turn her head to me.
"Deino," She said while not jumping off the bed, in fact, she just made herself even more comfortable.
"This isn't a debate," I stated before coming to the bed and tried my best to pry her off from the bed with very little success. Arceus, how heavy was she!?
"Come... ooooon!" I tried really hard, but the thing just wouldn't move! I even heard her slight giggle, she was mocking me too!
"Alright, I guess we are gonna need more force," I said before finding both Bunni's and Tusky's pokéballs. Why did I have the feeling this was going to be a long night?
{*}{*}{*}{*}{*}{*}
To say getting her off the bed was hard would be an understatement. I did get some sleep,
but it took both Tusky's and Bunni's strength to pry her off the bed, and she was very grumpy about it too.
How you might ask?
"I told you already, this jacket is not yours to bite!" I yelled at her while she kept her grip on my very pricy jacket that took a lot of part-time work to get.
As you could see, she didn't care at all about the jacket, she was just doing it to spite me.
Anyway, we were currently eating breakfast while I was sitting on one of the many tables the center provided. I couldn't say we were eating in silence because of Diana being a selfish prick, but there was nothing I could do until Radko came.
If he would ever come.
The thought made me loosen my grip on the spoon that I was eating my cereals with, contemplating if that stuck-up would show up or not.
I kept swirling the cereals, hoping to distract myself for a moment, before I looked around the mess hall one more time, and lo and behold, I actually spotted Radko near the booth for breakfast.
I was a little happy at first before I spotted that small frown of his that felt like it was there the whole time. I knew for a fact that Radko always tried to keep at least a small smile wherever we were or what the situation was. To see him replace that smile with a frown felt… worrying.
He got a tray of the usual he always got since we began the journey, and for a fraction of a second, our eyes met.
His were completely bloodshot with circles under his eyes visible as well. The frown deepened by a small fraction before he settled down on the same table as me, although he was as far away as possible from me.
Diana picked up on his scent apparently before happily hopping to him. He tilted his head to the ground, spotting Diana and his frown eased a little, though it wasn't fully gone.
"I'm sorry, girl. Hopefully, Hilda took good care of you," He said, his voice hoarse.
"Deino?" Diana asked, making Radko slump.
"I'll be fine, just…" He trailed off before glaring lightly in my direction. His gestures, while small, still felt extremely hostile. He was still definitely mad, that was for sure.
Though for a second I thought I saw something flash gold inside his blue eyes that were surrounded by his red scleras. But once I blinked, the golden light was gone, like it never existed in the first place.
"What was that?" I thought. I was sure I wasn't hallucinating and I didn't see any light that could have caused it so…
"Hilda," Radko said, bringing me out of thoughts. I didn't see Diana anywhere, which meant she was already inside her pokéball, "I'm willing to go on with you until we reach Castelia, but once we get there, we'll go our separate ways."
The fact that his voice didn't match his glare sent the message clearly, but he couldn't keep up the sulky attitude forever, right?
"Look Radko, I—"
"It's fine," He cut me off, his words clearly betraying that he wasn't fine, "You have your opinion, and I do not need to change it anyway."
"Radko, you're being the unreasonable one here right now," I said to him defiantly.
"Am I though?" He shot back, leaning his elbows on the table, "Hilda, I'm dead set on finding my way home, but then you came up with the idea that I was being used by my father."
I got another piercing glare that was honestly quite intimidating.
"Where were you aiming with what you said?" He asked, and I was taken back by that. It took me a few moments to form an actual response.
"Because, again, with how you described your relationship with your father," I began, before subconsciously bringing my right hand on my chest, "Has he ever given you a choice?"
There was a visible crack in his mask that he quickly tried to hide but after a few moments of contemplation, his mask broke fully. His bloodshot eyes started to well up with tears again, and quiet sobs escaped his lips.
"...No," His voice cracked under his answer, "But… that just couldn't be it, right? He… he must have a reason to… to…"
Before he could finish, he fully broke down, but even then he tried to keep his cry to be just barely above a whisper. He didn't want to make a scene, which, while commendable, wasn't really a good way to cope.
I stood up from my chair, ignoring any people that could be staring at us before slowly stroking his back. He looked at me with eyes that I didn't think could get redder, but were so anyway.
"Come, our rooms should still be empty," I said to him, and he didn't give me a reply, instead he slowly got up as well, the breakfast he brought was untouched, but I couldn't care less about that.
I had to make things right since I was the reason why Radko was in such a bad state in the first place. Guilt reared its ugly head again, clawing at me while I led Radko back to my room. After closing the doors and locking them with the key, I let Radko sit on the bed, but he kept his cries to a minimum.
I sat beside him, letting him cry before I hugged him. It was rather hard since he was almost a head taller than me, but soon enough he buried his head on my shoulder.
"There is no way, right?" He asked between sobs, "But then why does everything I think of reach the same answer?"
I wished I was better at talking in these situations.
"Better late than never," I thought.
"Look, until he says it to you himself, you'll never know," I began, and I already thought I was making things worse instead, but I continued anyway, "But once you get back and find that out yourself, you could just deck your old man in the face, and then come back here."
Radko stopped his sobbing, before looking up. Instead of it being the frown I saw today, he was completely baffled, until a small chuckle escaped his lips.
"You are probably the worst pep-talker I have ever heard of," He said, his regular attitude slowly coming back, "But… I guess the prospect of hitting my father does feel rather enticing if it ever comes to that point."
"Hey, once we get to Castelia, you'll ask him yourself, and then it should be you who gets to choose. Not him," I said before a smile appeared on my face, "Besides, you already have Diana, and she will be the last person to ever betray you."
I heard another chuckle from him. Maybe I wasn't as bad at this as I thought.
"I guess you're right," He said before finally letting go of me, revealing a complete mess that was my rival. At least now he wore that damned smile of his, "Thank you, Hilda. I'm honestly surprised that I would say that after what happened down there."
"Hey, it's alright. I'm kind of at fault here too," I admitted, "It was kind of rude of me to just bad mouth your father, even though he probably deserves it."
"Let's talk about my father for another time. Once I get to meet him, I'll ask him, and if I don't like his answer," He said before picking up Diana's pokéball, "I won't be the only one to deck him."
That made me smile as well. I thought today was going to be an absolute mess, but it turned out to be ok… for the most part.
"Now, you should do something about yourself," I said to him while eyeing him from top to bottom, "You look like you came straight out of bed."
"You aren't that far from the truth, loathing am I to admit it," He said. He stood up from my bed and went to the doors, twisting the key before opening his way out of my room. Before he left, he turned back to me with another one of his smiles.
"Again, thank you, Hilda. I thought I would never say this but, I'm happy to be your rival," He said before leaving the place.
That… took me back slightly. I fidgeted with my bangs, tugging them behind my ear while looking away from the doors.
"Freakin' dork."
AN: Excuse me for the warning on the top, but I thought it would appropriate since this was an emotionally heavy chapter. But hey, everything came to a nice and wholesome conclusion.
Shoutout to the awesome community that is the Fanfiction Treehouse, the people there are awesome.
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God's speed.