Normally I like to update stories once a week, but for this one I'll just update as I finish cohptohaps.
So here we go with the fusion AU! Based on a tumblr post I made, ask for the link if you're curious (the fic will eventually add more than what the post ended on).

Despite the fusions's names, I don't intend any romantic or sexual implications except as jokes, but it's totally fine if you want to see certain pairings in this.


"That's weird, the knots got tighter," Luffy remarked, studying the ropes holding Zoro in place on the wooden cross. Zoro and Coby shot panicked looks at the firing squad as Luffy fiddled with the knots.

"Just gimme a sword!" Zoro snapped. "Moron!"

A moment later, Zoro was holding back the Marines with all three of his swords while Luffy and Coby watched in awe.

"I'll join your crew," he said. "But should you get in the way of my ambition . . . I won't hesitate to strike you down."

"Fine by me . . . Zoro!" Luffy exclaimed with a big grin.

The Marines were cut down in a flash, and Luffy looked around at a shriek to see Coby being held at gunpoint.

"Don't—Don't move!" Helmeppo screamed. "Or I'll blow this guy away! I swear!"

Luffy grinned and glanced to Zoro, noticing Morgan creeping up behind him. As Coby assured Luffy it was okay, Luffy and Zoro locked eyes, and Luffy stretched his arm out, grabbing Zoro's arm and pulling himself closer.

"Shall we?" he said. Zoro's eyes narrowed, but with blind trust, he allowed Luffy to lift one arm, grab him around the waist, and spin them in place, pressing their foreheads together.

A strange light emanated from the pair, making Morgan, Helmeppo, and Coby squint, and the pair's forms shifted within the light—

The light faded, and the other three stared, stunned.

A man tall as Morgan stood before them, wearing a white shirt ripped down the middle and holding three swords: One with the left arm, one with the right, and one held with two new arms sprouting from his sides. His eyes (the left one above a small scar) were full of spirit, and his green hair almost reached his shoulders, looking as if it had never seen a comb. A straw hat—Luffy's hat—hung around his neck.

"Swords, okay," he said to himself. "What is this? I'm stronger . . . do you know how to use these? Of course I do. You'd better explain everything later. Right. In the meantime . . ."

He looked between Morgan and Helmeppo, nodded, and turned to Morgan with an unknown swiftness, striking him down with two swords and leaping upon him, knocking him to the ground as he used Morgan as a springboard with rubber legs, flying to Helmeppo. The man, the strange amalgam of Zoro and Luffy, used the third sword to strike Helmeppo as he spun in a somersault.

The man landed neatly, and Helmeppo collapsed.

"Don't worry," the man said, sheathing his swords and looking at Coby. "I hit that one with the dull side."

Coby could only stare in shock. The man grinned and seemed about to speak when he wobbled in place. The light emanated from him briefly as his shape shrunk and shifted and Zoro and Luffy fell to the ground, back to normal.

"Hungry," Zoro said hoarsely from where he lay.

Luffy grinned and picked himself up. "Coby, c'mon, let's get him some food."

"I—Luffy-san, what was that?!" Coby shrieked.

"I'll explain another time," Luffy said, going to grab Zoro and holding him over his shoulder like a sack of flour. "Come on!"


"What a beautiful day," Luffy said happily, staring up at the clear sky.

"Yeah," Zoro murmured. He shook his head and looked back at Luffy. "Hey, don't forget, you have some explaining to do. What was that technique we used? Who was . . . ?"

"That was—" Luffy cocked his head. "Zoro, Luffy . . . Zolu. That was Zolu."

"But who—?"

"You and me," Luffy said, clapping his hands. "Mashed together!"

Zoro narrowed his eyes. "And how does that work?"

"It's a mystery," Luffy said with a shrug. "I've only done it with a couple people before now. Someone I once knew called it fusion."

"Fusion," Zoro repeated.

"He said something about it not being . . . very well-known," Luffy continued, scrunching up his face in thought.

Zoro leaned back, staring at the horizon.

"It made us stronger," he said.

"Sure," Luffy said. "Zolu's you and me, and we're both really strong, aren't we? Add that strength together, and . . ."

"You get super-strength," Zoro finished. "I see."

"We don't have to do it again if you don't want," Luffy added, now taking off his sandal and chewing on it. "'Cause it's kinda personal, plus you seem pretty independent with your ambition."

"I wouldn't mind," Zoro said. "Doing it again, that is. Of course, if I face the man I'm looking for . . . I'll do it alone. But . . ." He paused, gathering his thoughts. "In a bad situation, or if one of us needs help . . . that would be fine, since . . . especially when we have more crewmembers . . . we'll more than likely be helping each other out anyway."

Luffy grinned. "Well, we can also do it for fun."

Zoro frowned. "Right. Well . . . we—er, Zolu—he uses different techniques, your rubber body and my swords. But he instinctively knew . . ."

"Sure," Luffy said matter-of-factly, putting his sandal (now covered in teeth marks) on his foot again. "My instincts and your instincts combined, right?"

"Right." Zoro sighed. "You sure are an interesting guy."

Luffy grinned. "You think so?"

"By the way, do you know where we're headed?"


"You and Shanks were on the same ship?!" Luffy exclaimed in excitement.

"Yeah, not that that bastard did me any favors!" Buggy screamed. He scowled, staring into space. "Oh, he was a confident guy for sure, I felt it in him whenever we fought together—why am I reminiscing about this?! He ruined my life!"

"You . . . felt it in him?" Luffy repeated, tilting his head. Something about that phrasing was odd.

"Never mind!" Buggy screeched. "As I was saying—!"


"—And we hardly have enough food—"

Zoro rubbed his chin and glanced at Luffy. "Do you think Zolu would eat less than us overall, or the same amount? He's one body, but he's pretty big."

Luffy hummed in thought. His humming turned into a song, and then he cut himself off to answer. "About the same? That's how it's been in the past."

"What are you talking about?" Nami asked, looking over her map.

"Zolu," Luffy said, grinning.

Nami glanced at Zoro. "Do you mean him?"

"You'll find out later, probably," Zoro said, putting his hands behind his head and relaxing. "Now, what was that about food?"


"Usopp, calm down," Zoro hissed. "I have an idea . . . but you'll have to trust me."

Usopp nodded, eyes filled with tears. He looked in the direction where Jango and Kaya were.

"I'm going to try a technique with you," Zoro explained, "and if it works, just go with the flow. I think I can take over, but the most important thing will be to stay together."

"Are you going to tell me what it is?" Usopp cried.

"No, because you'll freak out even more and we don't need that right now. Just be glad I'm explaining more than Luffy did beforehand. Are you in?"

"Fine. Will it hurt?"

"It shouldn't."

Zoro sheathed his swords, yanked Usopp to his feet, and grabbed his arms. Suddenly realizing he knew nothing about dancing, he led them in awkward, unpracticed steps across the grass. Usopp was silent but his brow furrowed in confusion, wondering how this could possibly help them.

Their steps became smoother and their feet moved together in a foxtrot (though neither knew the name for it). Finally, Zoro picked Usopp up, and they locked eyes.

The strange light, so similar to the one which had created Zolu, surrounded them as Zoro brought Usopp to him.

When the light faded, a man as tall as Zolu stood among the trees. His nose was long and pointy as a tack, and a third eye rested on his forehead, above which curly green hair grew. His torso displayed overalls, the straps falling off of a white T-shirt underneath. Two arms held a slingshot in front of him while the other (new) two wielded a circular weapon made up of three fine blades—Zoro's swords.

"Time to save the damsel in distress," the man said aloud, and charged.

Jango never knew what hit him. One moment he had been ready to kill the girl, and the next his mouth was filled with a horrible spicy taste—a Tabasco pellet, expertly fired. In just another moment, he fell, for the circular weapon had spun between him and Kaya like a wheel or hula hoop, angled just so he was struck across the chest.

"Excellent," the man said, reaching the clearing and picking up his weapon. His face suddenly morphed, and he yelled out loud.

By the time Kaya sat up, Zoro and Usopp had unfused.

"What was that?!" Usopp screeched.

"You saved me," Kaya whispered, and Usopp decided to table the discussion for later.


"That looks really good!" Luffy exclaimed, jumping up and down at the sight of their new flag. "You're amazing!"

Usopp nodded proudly, setting aside the giant paintbrush. "I know, I know!"

"Now we can call ourselves pirates," Zoro said, clapping him on the back.

Usopp glanced at him and his eyes widened. "Wait, Zoro, you jerk! You still have to explain that thing to me!"

"What?" Luffy said.

"We fused," Zoro explained. "In the forest."

Luffy's grin outshone the sun. "Really?! You did it?! How?! Who was he?!"

"What's going on?" Nami asked.

"I want to know, too!" Usopp said indignantly, poking Zoro's shoulder. "One minute we were dancing, the next we were—we were—"

"Fused!" Luffy exclaimed, waving his arms about in excitement. "You fused, didn't you?!"

"Fused?" Nami repeated.

"It was pretty amazing," Zoro admitted. "Usopp was about to have a panic attack, and I thought if we got ourselves together, I could . . ."

"Help me be less scared," Usopp said in wonder. "I mean . . . when we were—fused, or whatever—I did feel less scared. Do you feel that kind of confidence all the time?"

"But what's his name?!" Luffy exclaimed.

"Probably . . . Zosopp," Zoro said. "Right?"

"But . . . just what are you talking about?" Nami said, looking completely lost.

"Usopp and Zoro squished together and made a new person," Luffy explained.

"Want to show them?" Zoro asked, turning to Usopp.

"I—no," Usopp said quickly. He crossed his arms. "Sorry, I'm just—um, the stars aren't right for it."

"That's fine," Zoro said, ignoring the disappointment radiating from Luffy.

"Wanna show them Zolu?" Luffy asked, perking up quickly.

Zoro shrugged and nodded. Despite his earlier hesitance, it seemed he had accepted fusion as quickly as he had Luffy.

Luffy grinned and led the dance once more as Nami and Usopp backed away, watching curiously. The light shone, and then faded, and Zolu was left standing on the deck.

"What do you think?" he asked, looking down at Nami and Usopp.

Nami covered her mouth, staring in shock, and Usopp's jaw dropped to the deck.

"Were—were we that awesome?" he squeaked.

"You and Zoro? I bet you were," Zolu said with a grin.

Nami frowned at this phrasing, lowering her hand. "Are Zoro and Luffy . . . still in there?" she said tentatively. "Who are we talking to right now?"

"It's me, Zolu," Zolu replied, squatting so he didn't have to look down the whole time.

"But are you Zoro or Luffy?"

"Um . . ." He frowned. "Both, and neither. I'm me."

He crossed his legs and sat as Luffy might, resting his two upper arms on the deck and crossing the lower set.

"Pirates are way weirder than I thought," Nami said at last, shaking her head.

"Weird? This is incredible!" Usopp exclaimed. "Unprecedented! Astounding! And other words for such a phenomenon!"

Zolu yawned. "I'm gonna unfuse so Zoro can nap," he announced, and before their eyes, he shone and split into Luffy and Zoro.

"See you," Zoro said, standing and going to the railing to nap as promised.

Luffy bounced to his feet, grinning. "Say, Nami, do you wanna try it?" he asked, holding out a hand. "You looked really fascinated!"

She stepped back, shaking her head. "Oh, no, you stay out of me," she said quickly. "I'd like to stay myself, if you don't mind."

"Aw, alright," Luffy said. He grinned and turned to Usopp instead. "Usopp, let's go try target practice!"


"Shouldn't he have fused first?" Usopp said tentatively as Zoro approached Mihawk, swords at the ready. "I mean, Zolu must be stronger than both of you—"

"No," Luffy said sternly. "This is Zoro's ambition. He needs to do it on his own."

Sanji glanced to them, vaguely wondering what they were talking about before his attention was drawn away again by the upcoming battle.


"Okay," Luffy said, staring down Krieg. "I have an idea."

He turned to Sanji. "Sanji! Become one with me!"

Sanji's eyes widened and his ears burned red. "What?!" he sputtered, clutching his cracked ribs and coughing. "Here? Now?" He looked around at the cooks, spying on the battle from inside. "But there are people around—"

"Oh, you already know about it?" Luffy said in delight. "Sorry if you'd rather do it in private, but this is kind of an emergency, wouldn't you say?"

"I don't damn well see how doing that will help anything!" Sanji roared, his ears and neck cherry-red.

"What?" Luffy said. "Are you dumb? It makes sense. We both wanna protect the restaurant, even if it's for different reasons, and if we do this I bet we'll be unstoppable, right? Even if it is our first time together."

"Have you . . . done it before?" Sanji said hesitantly.

"Well, yeah."

"In situations like this?"

"In fights, yeah."

"And it worked?"

"Yep!"

Sanji sighed, taking a deep breath and wincing. "Okay," he said at last. "I still don't see how the fuck this is going to help, but if you're so sure . . ."

He began loosening his tie as the cooks and Krieg stared at him and Luffy in utter confusion. "Do we even have time for buildup?"

"Sure," Luffy said. "Like I said, it's our first time. Don't you know anything? I thought you said you knew about this!"

He folded his arms, staring as Sanji approached him and grabbed his shoulder, staring him in the eyes.

"So what're you waiting for?" Sanji said, a bit awkwardly. He leaned in, ears burning red in embarrassment. "Let's do it and get it over with."

"Yeah," Luffy said, grinning, and to Sanji's shock he seized his hands, never mind the cracked ribs, and brought them in and out, in and out, releasing one side and then bringing it back in.

As they danced the jitterbug, Sanji's mouth caught up with his mind at last and he exclaimed, "What the hell kind of foreplay is this?!"

"Is that what you call it?" Luffy said, concentrating on getting them in a rhythm. "I call it dancing."

"Yeah, but what in the world does this have to do with—?"

Luffy brought them in one last time and the light surrounded them as their forms melded together.

The light faded. A man about the same height as the previous two fusions stood on the deck. A tie and collar hung around his neck, while the red vest was neatly buttoned closed. Blonde hair hung in his three eyes, barely covering asymmetrical swirled eyebrows, and the cigarette Sanji had once held, oddly enough, had become a lollipop. The old straw hat rested around his neck.

"Oh," the man said, feeling his healthy ribs. "You meant . . . oh. But what the hell is this . . . ? I see . . . yeah!"

"And who are you?!" Krieg yelled across the way, voicing what the other chefs were too shocked to say.

The man smirked and turned to him. "I'm Sanlu, and don't you forget it, shithead," he said, the two voices he had spoken with becoming one cocky tone. "If you think you're going to take this restaurant, you've got another thing coming."

He ran across the planks of wood, going straight for Krieg. Despite that Krieg was quick to fire sharp spikes, Sanlu hid his arms behind his back and took the hits to his chest and legs.

"No damaging the arms?" he said to himself as he reached Krieg. "Got it. No problem."

He landed kick after kick to the wootz steel shield and even headbutted it, leaving him reeling for a moment. When Krieg had climbed to the mast, Sanlu close behind with a big grin and rubber arms, the shield shattered into pieces.

"That'll teach you to mess with me and my friends," he said, ever-smirking, and leapt backwards. "Good thing this won't hurt my hands . . ."

He stretched his fingers out and dragged Krieg into the water with him like a slam dunk. But the second Sanlu hit the water, he glowed, shifted, and Sanji and Luffy popped out.

"What the fuck was that?" Sanji said in wonder. He climbed up onto the deck, coughing—his ribs weren't quite healed yet. "We did it . . . !"

He looked around. "Chore boy? Where'd you go?"

"Dumbass, he's drowning," Zeff snapped, kicking him across the face with his pegleg. "Devil Fruit users can't swim, didn't you know? Go get him!"

"He can't—? Why didn't anyone tell me?"


"Oh, that?" Luffy said, twirling his hat. "That was fusion."

Sanji narrowed his eyes as Yosaku listened in silent confusion. "Fusion?"

"Yeah," Luffy said in delight. "I think we worked really well together, huh? It was the same with me and Zoro!"

"The swordsman," Sanji said, staring out to sea. "You've . . . fused before, then?"

"Yeah," Luffy said. "Me n' Zoro did it, and Zoro and Usopp too. And, hey—what'd you think?"

Sanji rubbed his chin, thinking.

"It was something else, that's for sure," he said at last. "Is fusing possible with others?"

"Sure, I think so. Zoro and Usopp did it, so . . ."

Sanji sighed. "I would love to fuse with that beautiful lady Nami-san, then! What a perfect combination we would be!"

"Ah, about her!" Yosaku interrupted. "The place we're headed for is . . ."


"Everything went well?" Zoro said once he'd recovered from being smashed into by a runaway boat.

"It sure did!" Luffy exclaimed, eyes shining. "Me n' Sanji fused!"

"Did you?" Zoro said, eyeing Sanji. "Then you must've worked well together."

Sanji suddenly scowled and turned to Luffy. "Hey, I just remembered—you totally surprised me with the fusing thing!"

"How?" Luffy said blankly. "I said, 'Let's become one,' and you agreed."

"I didn't know you were being literal!"

"Well, how else can that be taken?"

"I thought you meant—"

They were interrupted by Johnny, running to them and crying out.


"Usopp!" Luffy exclaimed after Nami had stormed away. "Me n' Sanji fused!"

"You did?" Usopp exclaimed. He glanced at Sanji, considering. "How cool . . . then again, he did just kick me in the face . . ."

"Accident," Sanji excused.


"Hey, Luffy," Zoro said as the four met up in the park, ready to take down the fishmen. "Do you think we should fuse?"

"Ah, about that," Luffy said, but then Hachi sprayed him with ink as the others dove for cover.

"Why didn't you dodge?!" Usopp yelled.

"That's the thing," Luffy said, tugging on his legs. "My feet . . . are stuck."


Usopp eyed Zoro and Sanji, trying to work up the courage to ask to fuse with one of them to ease his fear—but when he saw Chu going for them, he acted on instinct, firing a rubber band at him.

Chu slowly turned to him, and Usopp taunted him before running far away from the village, praying he would be able take him down by himself.

"Hey," Zoro said, clutching his chest and staring into the water where Luffy had been thrown. "Should we . . . try fusing?"

"No way," Sanji said. "Your damn injuries might ruin it. Just do the best you can up here . . ."

He kicked off his shoes.

"And I'll take care of him!"

Before Zoro could protest, Sanji was underwater, Kuroobi not far behind.


"I did it," Usopp whispered yet again.

"So I heard," Zoro said, reclining against a wall. Usopp had tired himself out with shouting self-praise across the town, and now rested with him.

"I didn't need to fuse with anyone or anything!"

"You sure didn't. You're a pretty brave guy."

Usopp grinned.


"So!" Luffy exclaimed, folding his arms with a big grin. The sky was clear and the East Blue sea was beautiful as the Strawhats sailed.

"I think we should all practice fusion," he said. "Only so it's easier in bad situations, right?"

"Good point," Sanji agreed. Zoro and Usopp nodded, but Nami was silent.

Luffy grinned and turned to Zoro. "Think we need practice?"

"Not you and me," Zoro said, shaking his head. "It was pretty easy last time."

"Oh, right. Okay."

"But, on the other hand . . ." Zoro turned to Usopp. "What do you say? You and me?"

"Yeah," Usopp exclaimed, far less nervous this time.

They stepped forward and took each other's hands, stepping in the same manner as last time. It was much easier for them to fuse this time around as they pressed themselves together and grew before everyone's eyes.

"Sup," he said with an awkward grin. "Name's Zosopp."

Luffy held himself back from screaming in delight, instead crying, "So cool! What weapon is that?!"

"Oh, this?" Zosopp said, holding the circular blades. "It's only the best weapon you've ever seen. If I may . . ."

He threw it out to sea like a boomerang, and it came right back, expertly caught in the middle.

"And this is basically the most accurate slingshot in the world," he added, holding the item up and setting the circular blade aside.

Luffy bounced in place, flapping his arms about in excitement while Sanji eyed Zosopp up and down.

"Still have a long nose, I see," he said at last, grinning.

"You looking for a fight?" Zosopp asked before laughing.

"This is . . . something else," Nami murmured.

"I'm something else," Zosopp agreed.

"Well, go on and unfuse," Sanji said.

Zosopp paused, staring into space.

"Not yet, please?" he said in a tone similar to Usopp's. "Huh?" he said, now in Zoro's tone. "Well, okay, if you want."

He looked back to the others apologetically. "Sorry, Usopp doesn't want to unfuse yet."

"Oh, okay," Sanji said, frowning. Zosopp sat against the railing, his upper two arms behind his head and his lower two resting on his legs.

"Sanji, you and me," Luffy exclaimed, turning to him with eyes so bright he might have stored a star behind them.

"Yeah," Sanji agreed, and they began dancing again. Their fusion was far quicker and less clumsy this time around, and soon Sanlu stood on the deck, lollipop in mouth and vest buttoned neatly.

"Hey," he said, looking to Zosopp. "Stand up!"

Zosopp stood, and Sanlu got shoulder-to-shoulder with him, measuring their heights.

"Oh, we're about the same," he said in disappointment before standing on his tiptoes, trying to make himself taller. "Bet I can make myself hell of a lot taller!"

"Hey, you're using Luffy's power, that's cheating," Zosopp protested, smacking Sanlu on the side of the head.

"It's a natural ability, mossy long-nose!" Sanlu protested, sticking out his tongue around his lollipop.

"Cool it," Nami snapped, folding her arms. The two turned to her, and Sanlu grinned dopily before he unfused, leaving Sanji to smile and praise Nami and Luffy to laugh on the deck.

"Nami-san," Sanji exclaimed as Zosopp sat back down with a shrug, "my dear, will you do me the honor of fusing with me?"

"Nope," Nami said, smiling. She gently pushed him aside and turned to Luffy. "Luffy?"

"Ah, you want to?!" Luffy exclaimed while Sanji sulked.

"I—y-yeah," Nami said, holding her arms and shifting her weight. "If you do."

"Well, sure!" He held out his hand. "Don't worry, it'll be fine! And we can always stop when you wanna!"

At this, Nami finally took his hand, and they began dancing while Sanji sat next to Zosopp, still pouting. They stepped back and forth, side-to-side, and fell into the rhythm of the cha-cha; once Luffy spun Nami around, and they caught each other again, and then she spun him and picked him up, twirling in place and pressing themselves together as a tangerine light enveloped them.

"Whoa . . ."

The person was almost as tall as Zosopp, wearing a red tank top and a denim blue skirt held up by blue suspenders. Their face was bright and curious and covered in freckles, a third eye resting in their forehead (Luffy's scar of course in its usual place); the sides were framed by an untamed shock of red hair, and Nami's tattoo had stayed on the left shoulder; Luffy's straw hat hung around their neck.

"Awesome!" the person exclaimed. "Zosopp, stand up for a sec!"

Zosopp stood, and they measured themselves.

"The height really does depend on the partners, huh?" the person said to themselves, grinning. "Makes sense!"

"I guess you're called Nalu?" Sanji said, standing from his place and looking up at them.

The person frowned. "That name really doesn't sit right with me for some reason. I think Luna works better."

Sanji ran a hand through his hair. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"What?" Zosopp and Luna said together.

"My lovely Nami-san is part of you!" he exclaimed, pointing to Luna. "What do I do about this?!"

"Don't be an idiot," Luna suggested.

"What they said," Zosopp agreed.

Sanji muttered something, looking away, and Luna grinned and patted his head.

"If you really want something to do, I could use a snack," they said.

"Me too," Zosopp added, stretching.

Sanji went off to the kitchen, a cloud over his head and his hands in his pockets.

"He's grumpy," Luna remarked. They pulled their baton from their shirt and studied it. "Ah, so this didn't change . . . I see! Weapons only change if each person has their own!"

"That makes sense," Zosopp agreed. "Zolu had . . . er, Zoro's swords. They weren't changed. But obviously my weapon's the best."

"You have two," Luna pointed out.

"They're both the greatest." Zosopp grinned. "I'm unstoppable."

Luna grinned. "Well, that's good! Ah—"

They glowed and morphed and Luffy and Nami popped out, sitting up on the deck.

"Sorry, I got impatient!" Luffy exclaimed, running to the kitchen.

"Warn me first!" Nami yelled after him, standing. "Jerk!"

"How was it?" Zosopp asked, sitting down again.

"Fusing?" Nami said. "Weird. But not in a bad way." She touched her forehead. "We had three eyes . . . oh, we should try stretching next time . . ."

She cracked her back and started for the kitchen, but then paused and turned back to Zosopp. "You coming?"

"I'll come when I feel like it," he said.

She raised an eyebrow. "Okay . . . whatever."


Sanji was very glad to have Nami back, and though Zosopp's continued existence brought raised eyebrows when he entered for snacks, no one commented.

"Look, I'm not complaining," Sanji said at dinner when Zosopp arrived, "but how long are you going to stay fused?"

"I don't know," Zosopp said, scowling. "Why do you care?"

"For one thing, you're taking up a lot of space." Sanji gestured to the area.

Zosopp sat at the table and Luffy and Nami scooted away to make room. "And who do you think you are to tell me what to do?"

"What?" Sanji said. "Well, don't get your damn panties in a twist, I wasn't ordering anything."

"That's right you weren't." Zosopp glanced at Luffy, who was staring at him with a little frown. "What?"

Luffy shrugged and looked away.


"Luffy . . ."

Zosopp had volunteered to take watch for the night, saying something about how he was the only one good enough to do it, and so Sanji and Luffy were the only ones in the men's quarters that night.

"Yeah?" Luffy whispered.

"You said you'd fused before. How long . . . what was the longest time you ever stayed fused?"

Luffy stared at the ceiling.

"Did you fall asleep?"

"I'm thinking!" Luffy huffed. He wriggled in his hammock, getting energy out. "Well, it's hard to say, right? The first time he and I did it . . . we were really bad at staying together, and we had to practice. It took a long time, but we were able to stay together for years."

"Years?"

"But the thing is, we took breaks sometimes," Luffy explained. "Like after a tough fight or a big meal, and during bathtime since I had my Devil Fruit."

"You were fused all the time besides those times?" Sanji said.

Luffy nodded, not remembering that Sanji couldn't see him in the dark. "And later, when we wanted to stay fused even longer . . . we learned how to talk to each other in our heads. Head. His head."

"How so?"

"Like . . ." Luffy paused, chewing on his shirt as he thought. "If something was bothering one of us . . . we couldn't stay together as long. It was unbalanced. So we kinda . . . sometimes sat real quiet . . . and talked in our heads. Head."

"Oh," Sanji said in understanding. "You mean meditation."

"Is that what that's called? Yeah, that." Luffy glanced at Sanji, blonde hair barely visible. "Why'd you ask?"

"Him." Sanji pointed upwards.

"Oh."

"Are you worried?"

"A little," Luffy admitted. "I guess we were lucky . . . that we fit together so well back then. Zoro and Usopp make a good team, but I wonder, staying together for this long seems to be . . ."

He shrugged and covered his face with his hat. "We'll check on the situation in the morning."

"Alright," Sanji agreed, more out of sleepiness than anything, and soon both were snoring.


Sanji squinted at Zosopp as he crossed the deck, heading to the kitchen. Zosopp barely turned his head in acknowledgement as Sanji opened and shut the door.

Breakfast was almost ready when Sanji heard shouting outside. He turned off the burner and hurried out, meeting with Nami, and they went around to the stern, where Luffy and Zosopp were glaring at each other.

"Listen to me!" Luffy said, folding his arms. "You've been—"

"Why should I listen to you, rubber-brain?" Zosopp interrupted, towering over Luffy.

"Because I'm your captain!"

"I'd make a much better captain than you and you know it!"

"You've been fused for too long!" Luffy said firmly. "Unfuse right now, captain's orders!"

"Like I said, I'm not listening to someone who's not as good as me," Zosopp said, bringing out his slingshot. "Let's duel, right here, right now!"

Luffy glowered and turned to Sanji and Nami. "Hey, can one of you help out?"

"Yeah," Sanji said, stepping forward. "If we beat him up enough, he'll unfuse, right?"

"Right," Luffy said.

"I'll be over here," Nami called, backing away, and she turned and ran, hiding inside.

"Are we going to duel or not?" Zosopp sneered. "If you decline, I'll take that as my win. A man shouldn't back down from a fight!"

"I'm not," Luffy said, holding out his hand. Sanji took it, and they fused within a minute.

Sanlu now faced Zosopp head-on, one hand on his hip and the other holding the lollipop stick.

"Bring it on, jerk," he said around the candy.

Zosopp grinned and fired a pellet at Sanlu, who dodged and swung out a kick, knocking the slingshot from his hands. Zosopp's smile vanished as he brought out his boomerang blade, which was flung at Sanlu; Sanlu ducked and straightened back up.

"That all you got?" he said indignantly.

Zosopp smirked again, but then so did Sanlu.

"Gotcha," he said, ducking, and the weapon flew over his head and straight for Zosopp. Zosopp caught it just in time, spinning it like pizza dough before throwing it again; Sanlu ducked underneath it, ran forward, and kicked Zosopp, first in the shin and then behind the knees, forcing him to the ground. Sanlu dodged the blade coming back, knocked it out of the air with a foot, and delivered a hard axe kick to the top of Zosopp's head.

Zosopp was knocked down, and before he could get up, Sanlu kicked him again and again until he was battered and bruised. With a sound and blast of light, Usopp and Zoro fell to the deck, unmoving.

"And that's my win," Sanlu said proudly before unfusing himself. Sanji and Luffy got their bearings while Usopp and Zoro twitched.

"Fuck's sake, my head hurts," Zoro hissed, bringing a hand up to rub his temple.

"Help," Usopp whimpered. "I can't move . . ."

Sanji helped Zoro stand and Luffy helped Usopp.

"Good to see you guys," Luffy said happily, hugging Usopp, who groaned in pain as his joints cracked. "Go take a nap, you look terrible."

Zoro stared at him, still using Sanji for support. "But . . ."

"Nap first, then food, then we talk."

"Aye, captain," they said together, and shuffled in shame to the men's quarters.

"Food's getting cold," Sanji said at last. "Come on, let's go eat."


Zoro and Usopp showed up for lunch, bruised but refreshed, and were quiet for some time.

Finally, Nami broke the silence with, "Do you guys need treatment?"

"They're just bruises," Zoro said, grateful for the conversation.

"Time heals all wounds," Sanji added, dishing out the chowder. "Time and good food. Eat up."

"How do you feel?" Nami asked, oddly gentle.

"Sore?" Usopp offered.

"I meant mentally."

"Better than before," Zoro said through his chowder.

Luffy set down his bowl, the chowder halfway gone already, and looked between Zoro and Usopp. "So, you guys know better for next time, right?"

"Right," they said together.

"Sorry for the trouble, captain," Zoro added, bowing his head.

"Uh—sorry, Luffy," Usopp said sheepishly, ducking as if expecting to be hit. And hit he was, he and Zoro both by Luffy's gentle fists.

"I mean, I get it and all," Luffy added. "Fusion can make you lose yourself if you do it for a long time. You just gotta know your limit."

"It was weird," Usopp burst out. "It was nice at first, but—"

"Calm down and watch your chowder," Sanji said, tapping Usopp's shoulder, and Usopp frantically grabbed his bowl back from Luffy's hands. As Luffy frowned and brought his hands back, now going for Zoro's bowl, Sanji continued, "It's all over and done with, and like Luffy said, you guys know better for next time."

Usopp nodded and returned to his chowder, holding it out of Luffy's reach.


"Hey."

Usopp jumped and turned to see Zoro. He had crept out of the men's room to take a leak and was just heading back.

"Hi," he whispered. He glanced up; Nami was on watch in the crow's nest, and she glanced down to check the noise before returning to her post.

Zoro rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. "I . . . sorry about what happened."

"What?" Usopp exclaimed. "But—wasn't it my fault?"

"Hm?"

"I—well, y'know, I really wanna be the captain," Usopp explained. "That was me coming out of Zosopp, right? I just—I'll only be captain if Luffy quits, but he's not doing that anytime soon, is he, and he really acted captain-ly when we, when Zosopp, was talking like that—"

He stopped, rubbing his arms to calm himself down, and Zoro waited until he knew he was done talking to speak up.

"I get where you're coming from," he said. "But part of it was me, too. I think . . ." Here he stretched, gathering his thoughts. "Sometimes . . . I can be too confident. Like at the Baratie . . ."

"But wasn't it mostly—"

"I dunno why you're trying to take all the blame," Zoro interrupted, rubbing his eyes. "Let's pretend the whole reason Zosopp acted the way he did was because of your personality. If that was the case, I still should've been able to stop you, being part of the fusion and all. I won't let you shoulder all the guilt, Usopp."

Usopp was quiet now, playing with an overall strap and running a thumb over the cloth.

"Okay," he whispered. "I'm sorry, too."

"Right."

There was a noise behind them and they whipped around to see Luffy sneaking out to the deck. He glanced around and froze when he spotted Usopp and Zoro, and then pressed a finger to his lips and tiptoed to the kitchen.

"If he's getting a midnight snack, I want midnight booze," Zoro said abruptly, going after him.

"Wait for me!" Usopp exclaimed, hurrying after him.

The three were able to enjoy only minutes of a small feast when Nami came in and threatened a beating or a tattling to Sanji if they didn't get back to bed.


"Say goodbye, Strawhat!" Buggy screamed, dramatically raising the axe on the execution platform.

"Zoro!" Sanji yelled, making his way to him. "Let's fuse!"

"What?!" Zoro yelled, tearing his eyes from Luffy for a moment.

"We'll be faster—we can reach him! Come on!"

Sanji reached out his hand as he ran forward, and Zoro did the same, but before their fingers could even brush, Buggy brought the axe swinging down.

Minutes later, Luffy stood in front of them, laughing and dusting off his hat.

"Man, that was close," he exclaimed, placing his hat back on. He glanced up at Zoro and Sanji and saw their hands still outstretched, about to clasp. "Ah! You guys were gonna fuse, weren't you?! Can you do it now?!"

"No," they said together, yanking their hands back.

Luffy pouted. "Boo. Come on, then, let's go!"