These scenes are a collection in no particular order. I write and post missing scenes from various episodes when they come to my mind. There is no timeline, but I will state which episode the scene is from at the beginning of every chapter. Here's to uncovering mysteries.


Surrender Benson

Nick answered his phone as he and Fin drove back toward the precinct from the barricades to and from Long Island. They were no closer to finding Olivia, further discouraged by the fact that she had been missing for over four days.

He reached into the center console to answer the number he didn't recognize. "Detective Amaro."

The exhaustion taking over his body was so intense he could hardly find the energy to speak. Every emotion he was previously capable of feeling had long been abandoned. Now he was as numb as he possibly could be, wishing to remain that way. It was easier not to feel.

However, when he heard the voice of the woman on the other end of the call, those feelings returned all at once.

"Nick. Nick I need backup at 598 Hollow Road, Sound Beach. He's down."

It was Olivia - what was left of her. The voice was somehow familiar, yet almost unrecognizable. Even so, he knew who it was immediately.

"Liv! Olivia, are you ok?" He need to know that she wasn't calling as she sat mortally wounded.

"Send paramedics in first. He's down." She didn't answer his question.

"We're on our way, Liv. Hold on. Just stay on the line with me, ok."

He gripped the phone until his knuckles were white.

Nick was discouraged and still relieved by the silence on the other end. It meant she really was alone. Lewis wasn't luring them into a trap. Olivia held the phone, her steady breathing audible only every once and a while. She said nothing, and he didn't push her to. His foot pressed on the gas, taking the car swiftly toward the closest interstate exit to turn around.

Fin held the handle above him as he looked over. He kept his voice low. "It's Liv?!" The feelings surged back into his throat as his heart began to pound violently against his chest.

Nick took the exit and then hopped back on the interstate, headed back to the island.

"Yeah. Says Lewis is down. Call for backup. Get SWAT to standby. We need paramedics." Nick nodded, fear morphing to quiet anger and desperation in his voice.

Fin didn't question him, plucking the speaker device from the dash.

"Detective Odafin Tutuola, Manhattan SVU requesting backup at 589 Hollow Road, Sound Beach, Long Island. SWAT and EMS requested." He held the speaker as he waited for a response.

Nick didn't have to look at his speedometer to know he was going way over the speed limit. He had to get to his partner. He had to know she was ok.

"Copy. Backup's on the way."


Olivia heard the car's tires over the rocks as she sat on the floor, her back against the wall. Lewis was in front of her, uncuffed after she'd gotten him free, beaten to a pulp. He was out cold, and Olivia did nothing but look at him blankly. She couldn't do anything else.

She let her head rest against the wall as she tried to fight off unconsciousness. It was a never-ending struggle she'd battled in for four days. Her head pounded, stinging and aching at the same time, mimicking exactly what every nerve in her body did. Deep pain echoed within her bones, the very frame of her being. Even deeper pain reverberated in the very depth of her mind, her thoughts, her emotions.

Even if she had the mental drive to stand, she was unsure her legs would hold her. Her arms felt like they were aflame as the burns and cuts, glowing bright red, tried to heal themselves. The bones in her wrist sent shooting pains up her arm and down every finger of her left hand, no doubt shattered. The pain in her ribs alerted her to a more serious injury. With the difficulty she felt taking deep breaths, she knew also that her ribs had been josteled too hard. All of her body had been.

Her eyes remained closed as the heard the door of the house open.


Nick pulled into the vacant driveway with anxiety that threatened to eat him alive. Fin felt exactly the same as they both stared at the desolate structure nestled alone ashore the overcast bay.

"I'm going to go in." Nick turned the car off and then stepped out where a steady rain had begun to come down.

He touched his gun absentmindedly, silently picturing what he might find within the isolated home. Every image he pictured frightened him a bit more. Fin could hardly stand up as he held the car door to support his weight upon his legs as he swayed on his feet.

The two vehicles that pulled in behind them were alive with flashing lights. One was an ambulance, the other a squad car from a nearby precinct. Paramedics jumped out of the ambulance.

"Perp is down. Get him out first. I'll find the detective." Nick told them.

"You're sure it's clear?" One of them questioned him.

"Detective Benson knows what she's doing. It's clear." His emotions came out in explosive anger. Of course Lewis was down. But he had to see it first. He had to be the one to see his partner first.

The paramedics slung bags over their shoulders and grabbed the stretcher from the back, about to head in as more backup arrived on site.

Nick looked up at them. "Just wait. I'll go first."

"You coming?" Nick turned to Fin.

Fin felt the butterflies in his stomach begin to leap into his bloodstream. He swallowed and shook his head.

"I can't." That was all he had to say. The occupants of the squad car stayed outside upon Nick's request. They stood together as the paramedics awaited Nick at the door.

Nick put a hand on his fellow detective's shoulder and then jumped into motion. He jogged to the door where the paramedics were, taking a look back out to the bay, holding the doorknob in his hand before going in. Movement came from deep within the house, and he held his gun in his hand while he weaved into the hallway and encountered another.

He stopped. "Liv?" The tone he used was full of caution. A voice inside his head screamed at him to leave. It took everything he had to continue forward toward the scene that he knew would break him.

"He's down, Nick. In here." His partner's voice came from a room at the end of the hall.

When Nick stepped into the room, he noticed how his partner, sitting on the floor, flinched violently. She held up her hand to fend off a blow as if it was an instinct. Looking almost ashamed, she let it fall to the floor again, the phone still lying beside her. Quickly, Nick holstered his weapon and took a look at the scene that lay before him. His feet had turned into cement blocks. He couldn't move. Paramedics bumped him as he could do nothing but stare. They hoisted Lewis' still body onto the stretcher after checking his pulse, leaving the room before he was even strapped in.

Just inside the doorframe, Nick was stopped, frozen. What an empty room, an empty room full of distress. There she was, the woman they'd all searched for endlessly - the one whose face he'd seen in the winks of sleep he'd caught the past three nights. She sat on the floor, blood smeared on her arms, chest, and face. When she looked up, he saw the darkness in her eyes. Something about that look snapped him back into motion again. He walked as quickly as he could to her side and crouched down in front of her.

"You alright, Liv?" His voice was soft, just soft enough to keep the shooting pains in her head from getting worse.

Olivia reached out and put her hand around Nick's arm. She had to make sure he was real.

"Yeah." She sighed as heavily as her ribs would allow, realizing he was really there in front of her.

Nick covered her hand with his own resting on his knee before reaching out to push her hair from her face. He examined the gash in her head, the split in her lip, the bruises already beginning to form. It made him so sick he thought he might puke. And at the same time it made him so angry he thought he'd explode.

"God, Liv." He whispered in utter shock.

He couldn't stop the words from falling out. "I'm so sorry."

Olivia used the last of her reserved energy to reach up and take his hand away from her face and shake her head. "I'll live." It was like the breath of the wind, so soft he could hear the very pain in it. Everything she'd endured the previous four days spilled out in just two words. She tried her hardest to offer him a reassuring smile, but it was nothing but a grimace.

Nick could see the pain radiating from her broken body. Every inch of her was covered in perspiration, mingling easily with the blood that still seeped from her fresh wounds. Her arms had patterns of lacerations and burns, her shirt torn and singed. Every injury he saw pushed a pin farther into his heart.

Her eye was already blackening, her wrists bruising badly. No doubt Lewis had restrained her with the handcuffs lying on the ground - handcuffs that she wore on her belt as she protected the city. The pain in her eyes revealed the darkness she'd experienced in four day's time. It killed him that those same eyes he'd looked into almost every day for the last three years had changed. Olivia Benson was different.

"Please - sit." She knew she couldn't stand yet. She needed time to breathe before another assault began - one instigated by the paramedics, the press, the other officers.

It didn't even look like his partner in front of him, but Nick did what she asked. Needing to keep the reality of him close, Olivia moved her hand so he could keep it in his. She couldn't lose her line to the real world while she closed her eyes. The pains running through her wrist and hand were dulled by the comfort of Nick's hand.

She knew what awaited her outside that house, and she wasn't ready to face it just yet. Nick supported the weight of her body, relief filling him, trying to push the sickness from him. She leaned against him heavily. He took every bit of weight she had been carrying alone.

"I thought you weren't going to get here in time." She whispered, unable to let her brain keep suffering from an onslaught of unspoken feelings.

"Neither did I." Nick confessed just as quietly.

Olivia turned her head to look straight into his eyes. "I look like hell."

Even in the oppression of the room, she lifted his spirits a little. Even with the small smile of relief on their hearts, neither one of them could even hint at a smile.

"Never." Nick assured her.

The anxious feeling he held in his heart made him stand up again, taking her hand.

"Come on." He helped her to her feet, where she unsteadily stood for a bit.

He held her around the shoulders as he kept telling himself "it's over. She's ok."

Olivia didn't walk, but instead hugged her partner - tighter than she thought she was capable of. Nick wrapped his arms around her, wary of hurting her, but letting her know his comfort as he embraced her. The relief was tangible in the room. Maybe she wasn't ok, but she was alive.

His fingers caught a tear in her shirt, and he touched the torn skin beneath. As he stepped away from the hug, he held her hand in front of them both to steady her, and they walked toward the door. Olivia's heart raced as she heard the noises outside of more vehicles arriving, more voices. She didn't want them seeing her like that, especially other detectives. She was broken; she was in pain. They would know it the moment she stepped into view.

Nick felt the hesitation in Olivia's body as he reached for a blanket hanging over the couch in the living room. Holding it with his free hand, they both reached the door. He was the first to leave, pushing it open and letting her step out into the open where Mother Nature continued her wet onslaught of the island.

Nick stopped and let the blanket drape over Olivia's shoulders. Both of her hands remained extended, too painful to lower as she stared at the NYPD personnel staring back at her. The looks they gave her let her know what they were thinking. She'd worked so long to gain respect for her strength in the department, and that one moment was tearing it down. The help Nick offered with the blanket didn't affect her at all.

When his gaze returned to his partner, he could see her mind racing. "It's over now, Liv." He whispered to her.

Maybe if he said it enough times, she'd believe it. Maybe if he repeated it again, he'd believe it. Her legs moved in sync with Nick's, and they both stopped when Fin came up to them. The knife already in his gut was wrenched sideways as he looked at the woman he'd so long worked with and grown to love like family. She was bloody and bruised, seemingly smaller than she used to be. Her face was so dark with exhaustion and discomfort that Fin thought his breath was never going to return to his lungs.

He hated to give her the news he had to. "He's still alive." The terror in Olivia's eyes was evident to him once the words left Fin's mouth.

Her nerves began to panic again. "I don't know how."

The adrenaline her body ran on was leaving rapidly, and it showed in the shaking that her voice did. That voice didn't belong to her. Fin and Nick didn't recognize it at all. The woman standing before them seemed like a person neither one of them had ever met.

Fin assured her with a nod. "You did what you had to do."

The words didn't even seem to get through to Olivia as she stared down at Fin, her world frozen again.

"Let's get you out of here." Nick gently moved a little to try and get her to follow.

When she didn't, he tried to ignore the shattering his heart did for the hundredth time in a mere five minutes.

He tried harder to get her attention the second time. "Come on, Liv. Let's get you out of here."

As Fin reached for her, Olivia felt her legs move beneath her. Every raindrop on her face reminded her of her existence. Shewas alive.

Nick led his partner to the second ambulance on the scene; he saw the same look of panic in her face as they stood together.

He whispered in her ear gently, unmoving as he kept his hands on her shoulders. "I'll go with. I'll be right here."

And he would be. She believed him.