Click. Whirr.
Zoom. Shunk.
Clatter. Vrrrrp.
Sigh.
"Are you two *trying* to kill me?"
Zero, the Red Demon, the Destroyer, Squad Leader of the 0th Squad of the Maverick Hunters, deceased, recently un-deceased, blinked at the question.
X, the Father of All Reploids, newly-minted Squad Leader of the equally-new 17th Squad of the Maverick Hunters, had the decency to look embarassed.
"What a mess," Dr. Cain continued, shaking his head in the general direction of the two maintenance tables. "Maybe you're just trying to kill *yourselves*. From this level of damage, it seems you very nearly succeeded." He gave a meaningful look at Zero. "Again," he added.
Zero frowned.
X looked at the other robot. "Don't mind him," X said, his voice a plea for understanding. "He only gets morbid when the stakes are low. He's feeling better these days."
"Oh, yes, worlds better," Dr. Cain said, though his tone left his meaning open to interpretation. "You know, I was just thinking it'd been too long since I'd gotten to perform a full overhaul. Now I get to do two! I'm so lucky."
X shot disapproval at the human. Zero's frown deepened. "Sarcasm," he said, with just a little uncertainty.
Dr. Cain smiled. "Good! Glad to see we didn't lose all our progress with death number one."
"You're impossible," X sighed.
"No, Zero is impossible," Dr. Cain said merrily. "And yet here he is! Isn't that something. The real question is, are you alive again, or merely undead?" He peered closely at Zero. "Hm. You don't *look* like a zombie."
"Be nice," X said in as stern tones as ever he used. Ah, so that relationship was intact! From that end, anyway. Wonderful. Time for the next test.
The robot arms around Zero, which had been bustling about during the talking, withdrew. That gave him enough room to move. Dr. Cain swept his fingers across his datapad; the precautionary restraints around Zero's limbs rotated away, shunk-shunk. Because he was no fool, Dr. Cain also changed the repair sequence on X, focusing attention on his lower body and leaving his arms- and their weapons- free. Just in case. To Zero, Dr. Cain spoke. "Raise your arm."
After a moment, Zero pointed his right arm straight up. Dr. Cain checked a mental box. Able to interpret ambiguous commands- a much more important demonstration than the physical check.
"Form a buster."
It happened faster than Dr. Cain could blink- fingers vanished into Zero's forearm, replaced with the emitter to a frightfully powerful weapon. Typical. Even when every system was on the brink, Zero's self-repair had prioritized his arsenal.
"Charge a shot."
An audible whine filled the air, sliding up in pitch like a violinist's fingers sliding up his strings. When the sound was borderline painful it stabilized, oscillating slightly.
"Release it without firing," Dr. Cain whispered when he realized he was staring.
The sound ebbed, even more slowly than it had risen. When it was gone, Zero looked at Dr. Cain. The human nodded. "Good," he harrumphed. "You can lower your arm now. You passed."
Let him think he was talking about post-repair. To Dr. Cain, the release of the charge meant something far more important: Zero's weapons worked, but he didn't feel threatened. Time for a gamble. "Your combat mode's disengaged, then?"
"Never."
And yet neither Dr. Cain nor X was classified as a threat. That... was very comforting. Dr. Cain felt himself relax slightly. A quick input caused his backup plan to disengage. Three lasers underneath the table rotated back out of sight. Zero would never know how close he was to oblivion.
Dr. Cain felt X's eyes upon him. They were... expectant. Like X knew Dr. Cain was operating on multiple levels, and was waiting for the explanation that was surely forthcoming. Damn, but he was sharp.
Well! Dr. Cain didn't owe X an explanation, not yet anyway, certainly not in front of Zero. Not after seeing that ridiculously redacted report on the endgame of the Second Maverick War. And Dr. Cain never was very good at playing defense. "These are some pretty impressive plasma burns, Zero," he said. "If I didn't know better, I'd say only weapons of your caliber could hurt you so badly."
As expected, Zero didn't react; it was his default response- well, his second default response, behind killing things until matters were simple again. X, for his part, squirmed. Ha! You see, X, I'm not the only one keeping his cards close to the vest.
There would be time, soon Dr. Cain hoped, to come clean on these things. But some maintenance had to be done first. Some things needed to be patched up. Let the two robots come to terms on their own. Then they could explain what, exactly, had happened in Area 00. Just as soon as they knew themselves.
"Well, you can tell me all about it when you're ready," Dr. Cain said graciously. He tapped a few times at his data pad. Once more, the arms began to move towards Zero. The red robot flinched, then froze- never relaxing, but acquiescing.
"If you gave me raw materials I could do this myself," Zero noted.
"Naturally," Dr. Cain said, "and you will have to do some of it- some of your components are stubbornly incompatible with our tech standards. I wouldn't know how to do the finer repairs. But if you let me help you with what I *can* fix, it'll save you time and energy."
"It's good enough for me," X lobbied.
"It would be," Zero blurted.
"Of course," X said with a smile. "I trust Dr. Cain to help me out, just like I trust you."
"And-" Zero began, but stopped. His eyes flickered to Dr. Cain. So transparent. It looked like the good doctor was the impediment now. In that case, it was time to exit stage left.
"That should keep you going for a while," he said with a few more taps. "You've got a few hours' worth of repairs queued up. As for me, I'm going to go take a nap."
"Are you serious?" X said.
"I'm an old man, not a spring chicken like you lot. All this excitement has taken a lot out of me."
"You only say you're old when it's convenient. I know I've said those words before."
"Fine. In that case, I need my beauty sleep."
X's look was incredulous.
"Exactly!" said Dr. Cain. "See how much I could use a little beauty sleep?"
X rolled his eyes. "Your age excuse was better."
"Let's go with that one, then."
"But I'm older than you," X pointed out before Dr. Cain could shuffle away. "Zero and I both are."
Dr. Cain smiled, but probably not for the reason X might have guessed. "But you both slept for a long time already. I've got a lot of catching up to do. Best to get started."
The door clicked shut behind him. So- he was confident he could leave the two of them alone. Now that he'd given them a bit of a push, it was time to let them come back together. As for him, well, he needed to go somewhere that would let him watch.
He wondered if he had time to grab some popcorn from the lounge, first.
"He didn't bother you too much, did he?" X asked anxiously.
"No."
"Oh, good. He means well," X added. "He just... says things. He can't help himself."
Zero looked down at his vulnerable, exposed body. He watched as the arms went about their business. "It does... seem like he's trying to help."
X laughed.
"What?" Zero said nervously.
"I just remember saying those words before," X said. "You were in a similar position, the first time we met."
Whirr.
Vrrrm.
"Don't you remember?"
Zoop, click, clunk.
"You don't remember."
"I remember meeting you," Zero insisted. "I do! I remember the things I thought about you then. Most of them. I just don't remember-"
Shck. Vrrrm.
When Zero didn't clarify, X closed his eyes. "Don't worry about it. I know you're trying."
"Trying isn't good enough. You've been in battle. You know that. Trying hard isn't winning. Trying hard is what happens right before you die."
"You're not going to be able to make this a downer," X said with a smile. "The war's over, we survived, I got you back alive... it's about as good an outcome, overall, as we could have hoped for."
"Was it?" Zero asked.
"Oh, yes! The war... well, war is always awful, but compared to the First War- that's what they're calling it now, the First Maverick War, this was the Second- compared to the First War, this went much better. The Mavericks rushed this one, they weren't ready. We were on our guard, too. We weren't ambushed and massacred in the first hour, like happened in the First War. No large-scale defections, either. Not from the Hunters, anyway. And most of fighting was well outside of the cities. The civilian costs- and the Hunter costs, too- they were all much lower. If you have to have a war, then, then, this was a... good..."
Ch-chink. Clang.
"I didn't realize," Zero said. "No perspective. I only saw my small piece of the First War, and almost none of the Second. I guess they would have done all the damage assessments while I was dead. Dead?" Zero frowned. "Is that even the right word for me? Death is supposed to be final, or it's not really death, and I'm not dead."
"No, you're not," X said, regaining some cheer. "And that's only a good thing." He laughed. "Now that there's a squad leader senior to me, maybe they'll stop trying to make me boss of the whole Hunters."
"No," said Zero firmly.
X gave Zero an intrigued look. "No, what?"
"To... any of that," Zero said.
X's expression became playful. "What, you don't want to be Commander?"
"Of course not! I didn't even want to be a squad leader. I only did that because Sigma insisted." He huffed. "Maybe now that he's a traitor they'll let me step down."
"Not a chance," said X. "You're a hero, did you know? No one has your combination of service record, time in service, and decorations."
"Decorations?" Zero said, his voice both apprehensive and confused.
"They made a medal after you."
Zero winced. "Sarcasm again, right?" he said hopefully.
"Nope."
"I don't want medals," he said. "I don't Hunt because I want a medal. I doubt anyone has ever done anything because they wanted a medal."
"You deserved it, so..."
"No, I don't," Zero spat. "Not after..."
Sk-k-k-k. K-shhhh.
He looked around, nervously, before continuing in a lower voice. "Not after what just happened," he said.
"After what happened?" X said innocently.
"After I nearly killed you! I tried really hard. I very nearly succeeded."
"Wasn't you," said X.
Zero gaped.
"It wasn't you," X repeated. "You were being controlled by the Mavericks. They had some really good hardware installed in you to let them do it. I know, I removed it, remember? There's no shame, there."
"Of course there is," Zero said. "If it could happen once, it could happen again."
"Yes, it could absolutely happen that you could die again, and your nearly-rebuilt body could fall into the hands of Mavericks who happen to be the only beings on the planet with the slightest clue how your systems work, and they could install an additional hardware adapter to let them control you- yes, that could absolutely happen again."
"Even I can tell that's sarcasm."
"Zero," said X more seriously, "I feel really bad for you. I do! I know I'd be shaken up if something like that happened to me. But don't think for a second that I blame you for it."
"You should," Zero said. "A part of me..."
"Yes?"
"A part of me..."
Zero stopped cold, face thoroughly creased.
Vrrrp. Click.
"A part of you," X supplied, "likes fighting? Even when it's against me?"
"Yes," said Zero, almost too relieved. "Yes, I... yes, that's it."
"But the rest of you didn't, right? You didn't want to. You resented it."
"Bitterly."
"And the rest of you is most of you," X said reasonably. "That's the part I trust. That's the part I want by my side."
"But the other part comes with it," Zero protested.
"And I'll put up with that to get the rest."
"You don't know how dangerous that is," Zero whispered.
"Zero, if my arms weren't under repair, I would smack my own face. You died for me. That's the real you. That's what I believe. And it'll take a lot more than this to shake my faith."
Zero's mouth opened, then shut, opened again, shut again.
Clatter clatter. Whirr.
"I don't even know what to say to that," Zero said.
"Well, you'll need to get better at talking if you're going to be Commander of the Maverick Hunters," X said.
"I'm not going to be Commander! You're more senior than I am, anyway."
"No way. You've been in the Hunters since December 5th, 2147."
"That was the day I joined, but I haven't been in the Hunters the whole time," Zero countered.
"Sure you have."
"Time spent dead doesn't count. Subtract six months."
"You were never disenrolled, though."
"Disenrollment is automatic for those KIA, like I was. This will be a re-enrollment. I'll start from scratch."
"Not from scratch. There's a provision for interruption of service. If things ever calm down I want to take a sabbatical to do some research. When I do that, I'll come back with the same seniority as when I left."
"Okay, so for me death was a sabbatical."
"I don't think those words have ever been said before."
"Still doesn't count."
"Okay, so we won't count time spent dead. But that still leaves you the senior by two days."
Zero's face was taut with concentration. "What day are you counting for your enrollment?"
"June 6th."
"That's not right. Sigma's rebellion started on June 4th."
"I know," said X, "but there wasn't anyone around to do paperwork that day. I didn't officially join the Hunters until after the First War ended."
"But that doesn't reflect reality. You were a Hunter right from that day."
"No I wasn't," X demurred. "I was a concerned citizen, just doing what the First Law required."
"Was that a joke?" Zero said, puzzled.
"No."
"Oh. I thought it was. No, really," he said when he saw X's face. "I thought it was a joke. I saw a fair number of reploids that day, and none of them did even a fraction of what you did. You went way beyond what was required by the Laws. You were a Hunter that day, whether you acknowledge it or not." Zero smiled. "That means you're the senior one, by... thirty hours."
"Thirty...? No. What day are you counting for your reactivation?"
"The day we fought," Zero mumbled quietly.
"Ah, but you were activated before then," X said. "You met Moulson's Threshold much earlier."
"Moulson's...?"
"Oh... it's a robotics term."
This was ground Zero couldn't fight on, and he knew it. "What's your Hunter rating?" he asked.
"Bee," X said modestly. "Far below your Ess-rate."
"Bee?" Zero said incredulously. "Bee?!"
"I figured out the formula behind the examinations," X said, embarassed. "At that point I could have passed any exam they gave me. That's not fair, and it's not a fair evaluation of my abilities. So I stopped taking them."
Zero blinked. "Reading and reacting is your whole combat style, though," he protested. "That *is* your ability. If you could reverse-engineer the exam, then that exam is evaluating your abilities perfectly."
"I didn't think of it like that," X said. "That doesn't mean I'm going to start taking the exams again. The people who matter know regardless of what the paperwork says."
"That's more my style than yours," Zero said.
X laughed. "Knowing each other is changing us both. Actually," he said, before that could make Zero feel too uncomfortable, "I know why you were asking, to see if you could make me senior that way. Now that I think about it, though, I think I will take the exams again. Up to Ess-rate, anyway. And I'll backdate my paperwork to the start of the First War, and for you... I'll write down that you hit Moulson's Threshold on December 3rd, 2148."
Zero did the math. "That would make us the same seniority," he said.
"Exactly!" X said.
Zero's eyes widened. "Then neither of us is senior to the other."
"Which means neither of us can become the other's boss," X said happily. "Then neither of us can be Commander of the Hunters."
"And that," said Zero, "is victory."
Victory indeed, thought Dr. Cain, finishing his popcorn.
There was nothing more to worry about, then. Physical maintenance was still ongoing, but relationship maintenance- the far more important of the two- that was complete.
Dr. Cain had just enough self-awareness to bask in the irony of taking so much care of this relationship when each of his had crashed and burned. Then again, none of his relationships had swung the course of history.
This one, on the other hand, was the pivot on which the world turned.
And, for now at least, it was holding.
Dr. Cain turned off the lights, lay down, and took a nap.
Author's note: this ditty owes some debt to Laryna6. Thanks.
it's been too long since my last story. It won't be this long before the next, though. Coming on March 7th: Move, a story of a reploid who becomes mortal enemy to Hunters and Mavericks alike... merely by doing nothing.
