Time is an unstoppable force. No matter the environment or situation, the inevitable march of time will continue it's trek, fazed by nothing and no one. It does not acknowledge the three previous dimensions of our world and will continue to do as it may wish.

Of course, I'm no one special. So naturally, time does not abide by my wishes whatsoever. And that's exactly what it did. I did not have a Phone Microwave (Name Subject to change) [1] so it was my displeasure to see the day through.

I can hear it now: 'What, pray tell, has rendered our dearest Hikigaya Hachiman to be in a far more defeatist state than usual?'

The answer, dear children, is damn you for your defeatist comment. And the other answer is the stares. So many stares. As I had said, the eyes are often thought of as the windows of the soul. So naturally, when one feels the glare of malice upon one's back they will often note the sharp pierce within an individual's eye that renders the spine something equivalent to the consistency of watered down rice. Just as pleasant too.

But these stares did not come from the masses. No, they came from my two club mates. To be frank, this in of itself is not unusual. I get stares from them all the time after I make an arguably dubious and "creepy" statement or comment. Yet these stares came off in a way opposite to the normal look of as if they were viewing a pest needing to be exterminated.

It began two days after the outing that Yukinoshita and I shared for research purposes. A rather boisterous Yuigahama had been far more chummy than her usual self. Once I had made my point to leave, that's when the feeling began. A small shock traversed my spine and broke me into a cold sweat as I made the short but very far trek across the club room to the unusually heavy sliding door. Only once contact is broken, then I may sigh in relief.

Anyone with a brain would know that this could not go on. Rather than this coming back to haunt me later, I figured it best to nip it in the bud before it got out of hand.

What a pain.

Human relationships are a pain. Whoever decided humanity was to be a social creature that thrived off the contact of others while needing the tender balance of groups to remain in place for years to come? These connections were too fragile, much like thin glass trying to support a busy bridge. It will never work. Never, and you don't need some master of the sciences to tell you that (which I am not).

As you are aware, this is essentially a club for troubled students (Yukinoshita and I); naturally, it would mean any kind of communication is bound to go according to plan as predicting the movement of the rest of the outcome of one's life. Needless to say, not to plan at all. And say what you will about our Modern Japanese scores (top three mind you), this and that are like comparing apples and oranges.

Yes, yes I know. I'm putting it off by rambling.

Surely you must see my dilemma. It is the winter time, and thus Christmas is fast approaching. Everyone seems to get twisted up during the holiday season, which would make this situation ever the more troublesome when we reach that point.

I shall make an effort to resolve this by then. Now then, where to begin?

Perhaps we take the easier of the two and start off with the Yuigahama route. While indeed a bit guileful (though not near the level of Haruno-san), I believe I can handle her a little easier than the other one.

The Yukinoshita route…..I'd rather not mess that one up.

Quiet you, I can hear that you know.

The orange glow of the setting sun signified the end of club activities and the declaration of the metaphorical war to end all wars [2]. Despite knowing what had to be done, I could not help but notice the apparent shake of my fingers as I closed the novel I was reading. My heart raced in tandem with these nervous shakes, and yet here I am only sitting in place without expending the least bit of physical energy. My warming face was cooled by the moisture generated; one would surely think I'd have run the Chiba Aqualine [3] in this state.

Quite pathetic, isn't it?

Well, it seems like it is time to go on the offensive.


"Hey, uh, I'm heading out now. Yuigahama, mind if we grab a bite?"

The words I have dreaded to hear were uttered before me at this moment from the one I care most for to the other I value highly as a friend. Such words pierced the heart like an arrow that rang true.

The winter sun had begun to set and since a holiday was upon us in the coming week, I decided to end the club early for the sake of celebration and to avoid walking home in the dark.

The sudden question from Hikigaya-kun disrupted all thoughts of his predicted patterns. So much so, I dropped my composure along with my novel; I tried my best to fix this mistake but not without a betrayal of my beloved novel making a loud, unnatural noise that drew the inquisitive looks of my other two companions.

"Yukinon, is everything ok?" The unnaturally cheery voice of Yuigahama-san rang like a flute in my ear. Cool, yet excited brown eyes bore directly into my own.

Straining every nerve in my body to not croak, I gently cleared my throat. "Pay me no mind, Yuigahama-san. It was a simple slip up." I glanced up to meet dead, black eyes staring back at me. And despite the rather cool winter air, I could feel perspiration form across my brow. I couldn't bear to meet those at the moment, so I avoided them to watch the setting sun.

My explanation seemed to satisfy Yuigahama-san as she gave a soft 'Un!' in reply and proceeded to finish her packing. In one fluid motion, she swiped up her bag while hooking onto the arm of a bewildered Hikigaya-kun and made off toward the clubroom door. She turned around and gave a wave, a large smile adorned her face while framed perfectly by her dyed brown hair. "I'll see you later, Yukinon! Let's meet up for Christmas, yeah?"

I simply lifted the corners of my lips, anymore and I would for sure betray myself. "Yes, let's," was all I could muster.

And like a lion making away with its prized gazelle, the two of them left with a thud of the door. I released a breath I didn't know I was holding and slumped back down into my chair.

It hurts.

It hurts so much.

This is what I get for being indecisive and passive. This was all my fault after all. I should have known this would occur and yet it still hurts.

I felt myself moving, but didn't register anything until I found myself standing before an empty bike lot with the orange glow of the setting sun blazing upon my back. The fine swirl of my breath whisked around before me, dancing just ahead of my nose in the chill of dusk.

To be frank, I am not sure how long I stood there gazing at this empty lot. Time seemed to pass by both slowly at a crawl and quick like a bullet train. I just stared blankly in relative silence. You often see this scene in novels and other entertainment media so I was one to believe that such a phenomenon didn't occur in real life. My assumptions seemed to jump ahead of reality as that's exactly what I found myself to do. Yes it was rather cliche and yes it makes one wonder what exactly could be going through the mind in such a situation? I tend to believe it to be emotional shock that rendered me in such a way; I have after all, had my heart jumbled around and now what feels like being torn to shreds and stomped on. Wouldn't anyone try to numb the mind as a coping mechanism for such a radical and drastic change of their lives? Eliminating all perception and thought to cope with the immense physiological and psychological pain is a perfectly valid response. Yes. Lost in thought. Or lack thereof. Valid. I was so lost in non-thought that I evidently did not hear footsteps approaching, whirling around immediately when I heard a voice.

"Say, Yukinoshita, I never took you for an admirer of school bike lot architecture."

I sighed at the corny statement. "Sensei, I seem to recall smoking to be against school rules."

Behind me stood Hiratsuka-sensei who, with what appeared to be a practiced fluidity, sat leaning up on the brick wall of the school, facing out to the road. There was a small glow from the burning embers of her cigarette, the item now a short stub of its usual appearance. A tranquil expression lay on her face and her nearly violet eyes could be glimpsed from underneath her half-lidded gaze. Said eyes glanced at me from the side in a gesture that seemed to communicate 'What do you plan to do about it?' in a smug fashion.

I sighed once more, I resigned myself to the cheekiness of this teacher and joined her at the wall. A small chuckle escaped her as she reset herself on the wall, staring straight out to the horizon. Side by side we stood in silence, watching the sun set over the late winter Chiba skyline. A light but cool breeze rocked the two of us. Hiratsuka-sensei's raven black hair fluttered lightly, the embers of her cigarette flickering out. She muttered a curse and what sounded like a faint "not again" before tossing it to the side, pulling out a fresh one and her cheap drugstore lighter. The flame sparked to life at the pull of her finger, the flame dancing in the wind. Once lit, a satisfied Hiratsuka-sensei flipped the lighter once and deposited it back into her coat pocket in a swift and practiced motion. After some time she took a drag, the carcinogenic air swirling in a similar dance of the winter breeze. Finally, she broke the silence.

"Normally it's Hikigaya that I ambush here, so colour me surprised when I find the one and only Yukinoshita Yukino standing in the very same spot."

My stomach dropped and my heart constricted at the mention of his name. I remained silent and gazed upon the fading concrete. My hands clenched, knuckles turned white as I gripped the hem of my fluttering skirt.

We remained silent. Not a single muscle moved in that crisp wind. I found myself intently examining this unimpressive section of concrete. Years of wear and sun exposure have removed the once lively hue of its freshly laid new segment. The nearly life long encounter of stress have pushed it to its limits and generated cracks in the material. Its support was most likely failing, despite its creation and upbringing engineered for such a purpose; day by day the shoes of many pay it no heed and walk all over it. Once a mighty symbol of strength and durability, synonymous with the great and everlasting monuments and structures of the Ancient Roman Empire [4], now a shadow of that symbol and a pathetic piece of near garbage whose only purpose now is to be walked all over and forgotten by the hums of life.

How familiar.

Hiratsuka-sensei seemed to notice my abysmal state as she made some strange noise and re-positioned, once more taking a drag of her cigarette. "You damned kids. You are both far more similar than you think. It practically disgusts me."

I blinked. What? My head shot up and turned to her direction, but she continued to stare straight ahead.

"Y'know for being such smart kids, you sure are a bunch of idiots. Well, that is the whole reason this started in the first place." She chuckled to herself and tapped on the cigarette with a slender finger. She gazed at the ashen embers that lazily fluttered down to the ground, only to be blown away in the crisp wind. The lead in my heart returned and I went back to gaze upon the now familiar fading concrete.

"I actually had a similar situation with Hikigaya a bit ago. Funny how deja vu [5] works." She took a drag. Her eyes seemed distant, and a far but warm smile lit her expression. "I gave him a story about a student a while ago who fought hard to preserve the status quo. They succeeded, but at the cost of their own happiness. And yet, all that fighting turned out to be in vain.

"However, I look at you and see the opposite. I see someone who has hesitated and given up the fight for the sake of preservation for the status quo. I see the same sacrifice being made at the expense of your own happiness to preserve what was. But I haven't been naive. I can see how things are rolling. You seem to think it's all over. Here's some friendly advice from Teacher to student, beautiful woman to beautiful woman."

I glanced up at the final phrase. Hiratsuka-sensei's eyes sparkled in amusement. "Oi, don't give me that look. I know what you're thinking, it's not nice to tease your elders like that, Yukinoshita-san."

I couldn't help it. I cannot recall nor begin to explain what triggered the onslaught of a change but I could not stop once it arrived. I couldn't stop the chuckle that escaped out of me. Suffice to say, I have not felt better in a while. A wave of anxiety and tenseness seemed to dissipate with every reverb of laughter that I had. Once tranquility had finally come back to me, I expected a dismal look from Hiratsuka-sensei but found myself surprised to be met with a tender and warm smile.

"Now that's more like it." She had taken one last drag before tossing the spent stick on the ground, grinding it under the sole of her shoe. I eyed her as she pushed off the wall, and began to walk towards the staff parking lot only to stop after a few steps and turn her head; half her face was visible while an inquisitive, yet smug look was staring back at me.

"Say, I seem to recall the Yukinoshita family to be fighters who did not allow others to walk over them or stop them from their goals. While I know you to be more considerate which is quite a good thing, don't get me wrong. But that doesn't mean you can't indulge yourself after all you've done; you still have that family name." She gave a smile and a wink, then proceeded towards the staff parking lot.

And as if on cue, I felt my cell phone buzz. I pulled it out to meet two mails: one from Yuigahama-san and the other from Hikigaya-kun. I inhaled and exhaled to reset myself, determination flowing through me. My hand curled around the phone, gripping it tightly as I moved my thumb over the LED screen.


[1] Phone Microwave (Name Subject to Change): The title of Experiment 8 given by Okabe Rintarou from the Steins;Gate series. Quite a good one too, I recommend it

[2] War to End All Wars: One of the monikers given to the Great War, or World War I as many believed mankind would cease hostilities after the event...you all know how that turned out. And yes, Japan was actually part of the hostilities in this event. They would be the primary force that laid siege to the Imperial German port of Tsingtao from August to November of 1914, now present day Qingdao

[3] Chiba Aqualine Half Marathon: An annual event starting from the Kisazaru area in Chiba that traverses a relatively nice path across the Aqualine bridge that overlooks Tokyo Bay

[4] Many roads and structures of the Ancient Roman Empire were/are made of a rather long lasting concrete that, while similar to today's concrete in terms of comparable composition, seemed to have far greater durability and longevity properties than their modern counter parts. Some examples are roughly 2000 years old with very little wear to them. This one goes out to all you fellow engineering nerds and you niche concrete enthusiasts

[5] Feeling of a similar situation you have already experienced before. Also a banger of a song

A/N: Hello all, i am still alive. You may have noticed that I have changed my name from thatguy8801 to MoonlightKaiser. This was done to reflect a more coherent collection of users i tend to use and to finally shed the remnants of old 2010 xbox live gamertag energy. I hope we may get along well and that the change does not interfere with anything. if it does, well that's too damn bad.

You may have also noticed I bypassed the StuCo election arc here. Is there a reason for this? No. I simply did not account for nor plan anything with it. I will admit, I did not do as much planning as I should have. Noted for the future. Also dug into my past emotional teenager self for reference. Yes, actual teenagers are like this. Some things may also seem familiar in this chapter. Yes, this is intentional.

With that being said, I have found my interest in oregairu waning over the past month or so (who knows, maybe I can regain interest once again if I find the right content). And I had resolved myself to cut short and finish this experimental piece before I find myself abandoning it. I was always disheartened when I found a good fic (not saying this one is good by any means lol) that ended up being abandoned by the author. And so I wished to finish this in the coming chapters. How many, you may ask? Well, frankly I don't quite know. Less than 5, that's for sure.

But I have recently finished up radiation treatment (yay!) though, not without complications (naturally). Since my last hospital internment, I have had a serious lung issue that pretty much renders me out of breath after going up the stairs. We still have no clue as to what may be going on, however it seems my respiratory muscles are not functioning at the level they should be and thus not expelling enough air. You can see how this may be an issue. AFAIK, I'm not dying but I have been far more tired lately than usual. What do I know? I'm not a doctor. This long exposition is to simply say that because of this, I want to finish out the fic and get it done before I lose all energy.

With that being said, thank you for your kind words and I most certainly value feedback and constructive criticism, I am hoping to get back into things and then continue to improve. Until next time!

Edit: diction and grammatical revisions; elaborations and content additions