Title: Pella Wanwar Pairing: Tauriel/Thranduil
Series: The Hobbit [Films 2012-2014]
Rating: T Type: Fanfiction
Summary: After the desolation of Smaug and the battle of the five armies, all survivors have to rebuild and heal. For Tauriel it seems an impossible task, were it not for her King.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of The Hobbit characters or anything from the universe of The Lord of the Rings. I am just taking the characters and playing with them a while – promising to restore them whole and unblemished! Thanks t Tolkien for creating these toys for me to enjoy. Please don't take any of my playing as having any bearing on the actual series. Enjoy.
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When he found her there, in the ruins of Ravenhill; shattered herself, he finally accepted the pain that flooded through her.
He let her weep.
Kili was gone; she had never known pain such as this… but then, she had never known love. She had only known loyalty and duty.
All her life… all the years bound by honor were nothing, but for that moment in his eyes.
It stretched out in a splintered time that let them share eternity… In that moment they lived a lifetime; they loved more than words could express. Their lives together would have been full and joyful… they would have remained with the humans of Dale and their descendants married into the Dale generations for centuries until Kili grew weary and their great-great-grandchildren needed them no longer. Tauriel would have taken Kili west to the undying lands, there to a contented end…
Reality filtered through the remembered dream; she felt for the shattered vision that settled in the shadows… the truth crept about and veiled her abused and battered frame was almost too much to endure; he was gone.
Yet her heart beat on… her lungs continued to breathe…
She held his motionless body; Kili of Durins folk… and closed his lifeless eyes; his loss ripped a hole in her chest; tears streamed down her face to think she could have changed his fate… and she acknowledged her King, caring little for how she appeared… simply hollow…
She was raw and told him that if what she was feeling was love then she wanted no part of it…
Thranduils ice-sharp eyes observed her and he seemed to soften… he told her her pain was simply because what she had felt and shared with Kili was real.
Her King stood watch over her as she cried and he gently pulled her upward when Kilis kin arrived to take his body to the mountain he had fought so hard to liberate.
Tauriels strength was waning as she approached the Lonely Mountain but Thranduil bent his frame about her and took her weight. Comforted and supported by the King of Mirkwood, she was guided to her loves final resting place.
There, in a tomb of his forbears, Kili rested atop a cold and unwelcoming lump of stone, the last in the line of his brother, Gili, and his cousin, Thorin Oakenshield. And Tauriel was placed at the foot of his Sarcophagus as the dwarves, men and elves about her paid their respects to the fallen heroes of battle.
To her surprise, the battle-hardened Tauriel had become numb, deaf to any and all offers of solace granted by those who knew Kili and others who simply owed him their lives.
Thranduil had left her for a time, never truly too far away but enough distance to allow her grief while he spoke with Bard, now leader of the men in Dale, and Dain, now King under the mountain and ruler of Erebor and Lord of the Iron Caves. She heard them speak, not too far away, of burying the dead, of clearing the fallen Orc and debris of battle, of a new union and of sharing the wealth.
Time became meaningless to Tauriel over the following days, she was aware of all around her… she simply didn't care.
Eventually, she was removed from the space, Thranduil insisting she take rest and soothe her pains in the great baths, take a meal and rejuvenate, promising she could return once Kili had been attended to as per his people's rituals.
She wasn't keen to do this, but allowed herself to be gathered once more in her Kings arms and led away; all she knew was that there was comfort in the circle of his embrace and peace in allowing another to make decisions for her.
Tauriel was taken to her room and left to sleep; which found her easily.
She awoke at some point, days later, still numb and letting one moment fall into the next… washing and dressing in her freshly laundered garments.
The dwarves and men held their burial rites and Kili passed into legend.
"What now of Tauriel?" Thranduil asked after the ceremonies had passed by and were the memories of another season.
She stood at the foot of the sarcophagus, recognising the still statue of Kili and feeling as though she was stone herself. "What of her?"
The King tilted his head; his ice-aqua eyes attempting to pierce her resolve; she had none…
"I cannot leave you here…"
She shook her head, "And where would you take me to escape this…"
"Home," he said. There was no further point to make.
The King reasoned there was nothing for her in Erebor… that there was no reason in her prolonged suffering…
So when she agreed to leave she was surprised to be honored by Bard and his children… all three little ones had thanked her, giving her tokens for saving their lives… Tauriel accepted, not truly seeing them.
And before leaving Erebor for the final time, Thranduil took his leave of the Dwarves and Men and looked to Tauriel, who was stopped at the gate by Dain who gave her a stern gaze.
"I owe you something," the Dwarf Lord informed the elf.
"I do not believe so," she answered quietly.
"Aye, I do," he confirmed, sniffing loudly and turning to his side, "for the kindness you showed my kin…"
A page stepped forward with a chest and handed it to Dain, who turned to fix Tauriel as he moved the proffered item into her hands, "This is now yours."
She looked down at the chest in her hands… "What…?"
"You don't open that until you reach Mirkwood…" Dain told her and shot a look to Thranduil, "And you remember the gift is bestowed on you and your descendants alone."
Tauriel accepted the gift; she had no energy to question or argue… and from there she was drawn to Thranduil, who lifted her onto his Great Stags son…
"His name is Pella Wanwar," he informed her… I named him for three hearts I know continue beating through the loss they have faced…"
Pella turned his great head and looked to her; his antlers were slightly smaller than his fathers, but he was still an impressive sight to behold.
She placed her hand on his snout and watched his eyes close in acceptance, "On the borders of lost…" and she raised his head to look into his soul, "You will do your father honor."
The stag stood all the taller; one heart on the road to healing, so she turned to the second.
"He is magnificent, My Lord."
"He is yours," The King stated, his eyes lighting when reading her surprise, "he is the younger son of my own, fallen steed."
Taureil looked at once to the pain in his eyes, "My Lord…"
"Master him well," the King informed her, holding her eyes, "and he will always be true to you."
Those eyes, she thought, they bore more the deeper once you looked beyond the surface.
And beyond that ice, that coolness, there was a maelstrom of loss and hurt… which she understood now.
She had heard of how Legolas had left after the final battle; she knew his father would feel that absence, for the truth of it was she felt it also.
Legolas was kingly; he was honest, he was kind and true. If only she could have loved him as she was supposed to… he was a fine figure, cutting a swath that could only be etched in the most perfect depictions of all great artisans, new and ancient. None could deny his beauty… for he was perfection.
And yet…
Tauriel could not deny Legolas… should he but say the word and she would be at his side in all things, save one…
She had once, briefly, entertained the notion that their mutual appreciation could bend to romance… but knowing Thranduil would never permit his son and heir to court a lowly Silvern Elf from an ancient militia line, she had dismissed the idea and had never permitted it time again to ponder on.
She looked her King now; much changed by recent events, uncertain of how he would view the situation now. He was willing to accept the love she had borne for a Dwarf… could he accept a loosening of suitor-ship standings within Elven society?
Tauriel realised she had been stood, motionless, for too long… she moved to tie the chest to her steeds saddle, to find Thranduil assisting her.
The King was helping her loop buckles about the case…
When their hands touched, there was a flash and she met his eyes, knowing at once how isolated and uncertain the stoic leader of the Elves felt; over the loss of his soldiers, over the absence of his son and through the youthful bonds he had formed with one-time opponents.
He was just as much on the borders of lost as she was.
Tauriel found her hand closing on Thranduils, hoping to offer support and comfort…
The Kings expression softened, his lips curving before he leaned to her and placed a kiss upon her forehead, the gesture surprising all about them…
Thranduil then straightened, turned on his heel and strode toward the head of the troupe, his head held higher, his back straightened and his hand resting on the hilt of Orcrist, the elven sword Thorin had borne when first stepping foot into Mirkwood.
Tauriel looked about her to the soldiers, mounted and stood in formation, awaiting the marching order and doing their very best not to acknowledge the display she had been a part of… so then she looked to the humans and dwarves, who were all giggling and whispering amongst themselves…
A confused tumble of emotion filled her chest, making her gulp back the sensation… she hadn't felt anything for some time allowing the swirl to shake through her until she looked to Pella whose steady gaze calmed her.
She climbed into his back, the stag whinnying in appreciation…
And the company began moving through the gates and leaving Erebor in the past.
Tauriel breathed, looking ahead and following her King; knowing that whatever was to come, she and all about her must heal… it was the way of the world… and the heart.
