Not Our Neck Of The Woods

Act I: The Apprentice

As the Spirit Train pulled out of Castle Town Station, Princess Zelda stood in the doorway at the front of the passenger car, her hands clasped together as she gazed upon the engineer of the locomotive. Or rather tried to gaze upon him. The young man - more of a boy, really - had his back to his lone passenger as he concentrated on managing the on-rail vehicle, and he was also partially obscured by the heavy artillery cannon that sat on two wheels between the passenger car and the engine.

As far as Zelda was concerned, Link was as efficient and charming as the train he operated. He wasn't charming in that 'sweep you off your feet' kind of way, but in that sweet-natured and humble kind of way. From what little the Princess of New Hyrule could see of the dedicated engineer, he was still clad in that lime green tunic and hat she herself had picked out for him, seeming to have long-since foregone his smart, dark blue engineer uniform despite having it readily waiting in the wings. This was the first time Zelda had found herself in his company since… Well, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to call her previous time with Link an out-of-body experience, to say the least.

Glancing down at the couplings that kept the passenger car and cannon attached to one another, watching said couplings shake and rattle in time with the train's movements made the figure of royalty gulp nervously. She then shook her head, trying to usher her concerns away. She needed to have courage; the kind Link undoubtedly had. Pulling the folds of her flowing pink dress up slightly so as not to catch it on anything, Zelda started forward, stepping out of the safety of the carriage and onto the decidedly rickety (and noticeably small) platform of sorts that the cannon stood erected upon, her fancy shoes not exactly having the firmest of grips upon the smooth surface. The train shook suddenly as it went over a faint bump in the tracks and Zelda gave a cry of alarm, losing her balance and instinctively reaching out to wrap her arms around the cannon's tall, wooden support just in time, for if she hadn't steadied herself, she would surely have been sent sprawling off the train, perhaps even getting caught under it and… Zelda shivered at that thought. It was, to put simply, not a prospect worth dwelling on.

Pressing onward, though not daring to let go of the cannon as she made her way around it, the princess finally arrived in the locomotive's cab, Link still with his back to her as he worked the throttle, shifted a few levers, adjusted a few dials and otherwise engaged in a complex ritual that Zelda could scarcely follow or make sense of, reluctant as she was to admit that fact. She had seen Link operate this machine a hundred times over, yet she had never thought to memorise any of it lest she ever find herself in a situation where she had to work the controls? There were times when having grown up in the lap of luxury made Zelda sick at herself…

"Link… Thank you for this," she said, just loud enough for the boy to hear over the chugging of the train and the hissing of its equipment. She was referring to how Link had taken time off from work to take her for a private train ride for old time's sake.

"The pleasure's mine, Zelda," the engineer said offhandedly, his focus still not wavering from the task at hand. He then realised what he was saying. "Zelda!" he exclaimed, whirling around to face her, his cat-like eyes wide with bewilderment. "How…? I mean, how did you get into the cab?"

"I climbed around the cannon," Zelda stated, putting on a proud, confident facade. After all, there was no need for Link to know that she had very nearly slipped right off the train.

"Zelda, that was really dangerous," Link told her firmly. "What if you had fallen and hurt yourself, or worse? I mean, you're the only Princess this kingdom's got! And… Well… You're one of the only real friends I've got." he admitted in a quiet mumble, turning away for a moment as he said that last part.

"Well, I only wanted to show you how grateful I am," Zelda said somewhat apologetically. "Not many can make time for a Princess."

Link perked up a little at that, raising his eyebrows as he turned to face his passenger once more. "Isn't that the other way around?" he asked, smirking slyly.

"Oh, clam up," Zelda replied, putting her hands on her hips, but in spite of her attempt to pout, she had a small smile on her face, knowing that Link was right in a sense. Link, on his part, chuckled, aware of how sassy and hot-headed the Princess could be at times.

"Well, like I said, I'm just glad to have you aboard, Your Majesty," he said. His words were truthful, but he couldn't help adding a light, playful touch of mockery as he said the words 'Your Majesty'. Zelda might have been the Princess of New Hyrule, but after their journeys together, she would always be so much more than a figure of royalty to him. She was indispensable for reasons that had nothing to do with her heritage. There was no one quite like her in Link's eyes; a one-of-a-kind friend whom he was proud to know and always glad to share the company of. "Still, I should stop the train and see you safely back to the passenger car. The engineer's cab is no place for a Princess."

Zelda frowned slightly. "Oh?" she said, folding her arms. "And just what do you mean by that, my dear Royal Engineer?"

"I'm not implying anything, honest!" Link assured her, a little alarmed at her reaction. "I just meant that it gets pretty hot in here after a while, and as a one-man crew, I need to alternate from managing the levers and dials to shovelling coal at regular intervals," he said, gesturing to the narrow, bucket-like rectangular attachment at the foot of the front of the cannon, which held a fair amount of coal pieces and a small shovel; more of a spade than a shovel, really. "It'd be a shame to get that beautiful dress of yours dirty."

"Dirt? Ha! What's a little dirt?" Zelda declared, trying to sound tough. "And I've been in this cab heaps of times!"

"As a spirit," Link reminded her. "You couldn't feel the temperature as a spirit without a vessel. When you're very much alive, however, you find yourself sweltering very quickly when driving a train. There have been times when I had to pull over and get out for a few minutes to stop myself passing out."

"Then we'll split the work load! I'll shovel the coal and you work the bellows or whatever you call it!" Zelda insisted, her eyes filled with determination and a thirst to prove herself as something more than just a delicate girl in a pretty dress. "It'll keep us busy and take our minds off the heat!"

"Oh, boy…" Link said, suppressing an exasperated sigh. Experience had taught him that once Zelda had an idea in her head, there was no talking her out of it. "A Princess shovelling coal. This should be a treat," he muttered knowingly.

"What was that?"

Link shook his head, conveying that it was unimportant. "Okay, you can stay in the cab and help," he said at last. "But remember: I'm the engineer of this train and that means I'm in charge. And that, by extension, means you have to follow my orders for as long as you're the fireman. Fire woman, I guess I should say. In other words, when you're in the cab of this engine, you're not a Princess - you're my subordinate, or my apprentice. You okay with that?"

"If it means I can help, then yes," Zelda replied confidently, seeming to puff herself up to look all impressive and important. Link turned away, smirking.

"Alright, then. Rookie!" the boy barked very suddenly, making the princess jump slightly. "Man that shovel! I want four helpings of coal! On the double, if you please!"

A little bewildered, Zelda turned and picked up the shovel and dug it into the pile of dark, stone-like objects and hastily shuffled over to the locomotive's furnace, dropping a few coal pieces on the cab floor as she went. She hastily picked them up and tossed them into the boiler after the others.

"Keep 'em coming," Link said sharply as he turned his attention to the engine's interface of levers, gears and valves once more, pulling this and adjusting that. He then looked back at the princess and felt a faint stab of pity and guilt. He didn't like being harsh, especially not with Zelda of all people, but having trained under Alfonzo's command, the boy in green had inherited some of his mentor's habits. This was actually the first time Link had an extra pair of hands on the job, and having been his own boss for sometime now, he could only assume that the same level of discipline was needed when commanding a trainee of sorts. Still, his next words were a little more gentle, a little more like his usual self. "And Zelda?"

"Yeah?" Zelda grunted as she lifted another shovelful of coal and started over.

"Let me know when you've had enough."

Zelda snorted. "Ha! Not likely. Link, I swear as Princess of New Hyrule that there is nothing in this world that can make me admit to you that I can't take anymore."

Exactly fifteen minutes later…

"Liiiiink!" Zelda called in what sounded almost like a wail.

"Yeah?" Link called back as he turned the steam valve.

"I can't take anymore!" the girl moaned, sounding pathetic, and turning to check on her, Link decided that she certainly looked pathetic. Her forehead and flowing blonde hair were utterly drenched in sweat from the heat generated by the boiler's furnace, and her face and her dress had a hearty layer of coal dust and soot on them. This image, coupled with the look on her face, made Zelda look like a sad clown, and even though Link felt sorry for her, he couldn't help but laugh; it was an adorably priceless sight to behold.

"Alright, rookie, take five," he said, again speaking in that forced strict tone, though he was shaking his head in mild amusement regardless. "I think you've done a good enough job for today."

Zelda just moaned, taking a seat, realising too late that she had just placed her rear end in the coal tender, leading her outfit to be covered in even more coal dust. Her once pink dress was now mostly black, and it was all she could do not to break down into tears at how much she had gotten outside of her comfort zone. All her big talk had not paid off and the realisation of such was hitting her hard.

"Hey," Link said more gently, having walked over. He lifted the girl's chin gently and smiled warmly at her. "I mean it. You did good."

Zelda sniffed. "For a woman, you mean."

"No. You lasted more than twice as long as I did when I started out. I wanted to quit after five minutes, but Alfonzo wouldn't hear of it. He was insistent on toughening me up. And now look at you," he said, beaming. "I've never seen anyone other than Alfonzo tough it out like that with such persistence. You're really something, princess."

Zelda smiled in spite of herself, feeling a little better at the engineer's words. She then glanced out the side of the cab, noticing that they were now heading into a forest. She grimaced slightly; she wasn't a fan of forests. They tended to be a little creepy…

"Hey, Link, where are we actually going?" she asked.

"You let me worry about that," Link said, a knowing smile playing at the corners of his mouth as he shifted the train into high gear, the transport beginning to pick up speed as engineer and Princess proceeded into the shade of the trees…