Summary: Ever since he left middle school, Hachiman Hikigaya thought he could cover up the scars and forget about Adolescence Syndrome. That is, until he found Yukino Yukinoshita crying on the rooftop one Monday afternoon.

Notes: Technically a crossover with Rascal Does not Dream of Bunny Girl Senpai. The idea of Adolescence Syndrome originates there. All characters, settings, and canonical references belong to the Oregairu fandom.

oOo

Arc 1 Yukino Yukinoshita Can Always Hear You

The court of public opinion can be a fickle one. The atmosphere around you can change in an instant; in a singular moment of exceptional brilliance or mind-boggling stupidity. But for most people, the atmosphere around them hinges on the first impression. Were they handsome, athletic, and charismatic, attracting love letters and Valentine's chocolate like flies to honey? Or did they stand out in the opposite way; a pathetic, painfully shy, and weird kid with chuunibyou tendencies?

If you were a part of the latter, you learned very quickly that the atmosphere around you couldn't be altered as you once dreamed of. "I'll make friends tomorrow," is a lie spoken by those who desperately don't want to be left out of things as that first month of school passes by. The critical first month, where friendships are formed and social groups are created. The sentence "Eventually, I'll find someone just like me, and then we'll be best friends and that'll be enough," is also a lie, because what you wind up finding is Zaimokuza. PE partners out of necessity, not by choice. Social interactions outside of that class? Minimal. Friends? Don't make me laugh.

For the unlucky ones, the atmosphere doesn't change, no matter how many awkward conversations you strike up with the girl sitting next to you. Source? Me.

I spent months trying to change the atmosphere before everything happened. Before I missed three months of school recovering in the hospital because of the Syndrome. At that point I just stopped and decided that I should just accept myself and who I was. And I found that being a loner wasn't so bad after all.

Still, I wanted to learn more about the Syndrome; to understand how it worked. I began to notice how the atmosphere shifted around others as well. Some, like Zaimokuza, simply ignored it. Others tried to fight it, to change that very fabric of our social existence. And I suppose I was one of them at a certain point. But it was all so pointless. The only thing that changed was the scars on my arms.

So I put it all behind me.

"Once I start high school, it'll be better. I won't know anyone, so I can start fresh," I told myself back then.

Of course, this was another delusion. I couldn't change my situation in junior high, so why did I believe that it was possible for me to start fresh in a new school? I had, if nothing else, developed ever more sophisticated loner technology, so much so that I doubt anything would have changed even if the incident with the dog hadn't happened on the first day of school.

Still, at least those delusions kept me from becoming a complete hikikomori.

Well, those thoughts and the best little sister in the world.

oOo

Yukino Yukinoshita.

Soubu High School's resident Ice Queen.

The most beautiful girl in all of Soubu.

Scion of one of Chiba's wealthiest families.

Academic extraordinaire.

In other words, someone that, by every metric, should be at the very top of the social hierarchy. But of course, my observational skills never let me down. And after only casual, casual I tell you, observation over the course of a year and a half, I had noticed there was something quite curious about Yukino Yukinoshita.

Yukino Yukinoshita is a loner.

Indeed, before today, I'd never seen her initiate a single conversation with her peers. She conveyed a singular emotion; that of icy-cold arrogance. She had no friends and few acquaintances from what I could observe during the rare times our paths crossed. Indeed, she seemed to be in her own class of loners, certainly higher than mine. She'd transcended the need for human companionship, I supposed. Nothing seemed to have any effect on her; not the nasty rumours spouted by the girls in her class, and certainly not the dozens of love letters in her shoebox every Valentine's in spite of her frigid attitude.

The human race really was hopelessly in love with appearances.

At any rate, Yukino Yukinoshita maintained an aura of superiority; she certainly made me instinctively step aside to let her pass unimpeded in the hallways, as rare as those random occurrences were. I wasn't the only one either; you could almost always figure out when Yukinoshita was coming through the hallways at the end of classes just by the way other kids seemed to part like the Red Sea when she was walking by.

Knowing all this, I certainly never expected to see Yukino Yukinoshita cry. And honestly, witnessing such an event probably constituted some sort of information crime.

It was a Monday, which meant that I had a bento box for lunch. Mom and Dad had been home to eat dinner with us the day before, and Mom had, as she was wont to do, made extra food for dinner. Something about only eating one meal a week with the entire family convinced her to always make extra on such a rare occasion. Anyway, extra food meant leftovers, and leftovers meant lunch for the next day, and so instead of the sandwiches that I usually had for lunch I simply pulled out my bento.

What people said really was true, nothing beat Mom's cooking. Unfortunately, I wouldn't get a chance to enjoy it that day.

I chanced upon her on the roof, on one of the few days I sought peace away from my usual lunch spot. A confession was occurring on the steps in front of school, a rare event which always meant that half the school turned up to watch as the stuttering girl presented some riajuu with some handmade chocolate. She'd either be turned down, and descend into hysterics, or accepted, and descend into hysterics. Such was the result of pursuing that youthful dream of a high school romance.

I wouldn't get a moment of peace there today.

Normally, when my usual spot was unavailable, whether it was due to the weather or other uncontrollable factors, I am forced to eat lunch in my classroom, which is almost always a disaster. Lunch break is when the riajuus all seem to congregate in one place after all, talking in loud voices about whatever social event is next up on the calendar.

Now, you may wonder how that could possibly affect a loner such as myself. The short of it was that I don't particularly care about whatever social event they were discussing, but the noise was unbearable. Even putting in earbuds and turning up the music on my iPod to its loudest setting was insufficient for tuning out the noise. I could always hear some random idiot spouting off about the benefits of some hot spring that he wants everyone to go to. No, you don't want to visit the hot springs because you enjoy taking long baths, you just want to see the girls who happen to be dumb enough to come with you in swimsuits. It's not hard to tell.

Anyways, I'd like to enjoy my lunch in peace, thank you very much, hence why I picked a spot that nobody knew about.

But today, my spot on the steps of the school would be taken. And I really didn't want to stay in the classroom. At least it was sunny out, so I decided to leave my class and head up to the roof.

It was when I opened the door to the roof that I saw her. I didn't immediately recognize her, because her face was turned away from me. She was standing by the railing, holding her head in her hands.

"S-Stop it. S-shut UP! Just because you happen to have inherited some unfortunate genetic material from your parents to create such an abhorrent appearance does not mean that I have special arrangements with teachers for grades. I'm better than this. I don't need to be bothered by your insinuations. I don't. This isn't the first time, anyways." It was right then that I realized who exactly I had found, for even at a low murmur, Yukino Yukinoshita's voice was unmistakable.

Before I could even call out to her, however, she must have heard my footsteps because she straightened instantly, hastily swiping at her face and turning around.

Now, before I continue, you should know something important.

Yukino Yukinoshita has never looked anything less than perfect.

No, nothing sexual, you pervert. I'm not referring to Yukinoshita's physical beauty, although God knows she has enough of that as well. I'm talking about appearance. Not a single item of clothing or accessory was ever out of place on Yukinoshita. Her inscrutable poker face was always on display.

You'd understand then, how jarring it was for me to see her on the rooftop that day. For Yukinoshita had the appearance of a girl who had been pushed right up to the very edge of the cliff and had so very far to fall. There was a wildness to her eyes, tainted red by tears that she had so desperately tried to erase, but which could still be seen, tracking down her face.

"Y-Yukinoshita-" I stuttered out, before being silenced by the full force of her glare. It was reassuring, in a way; I was reminded that, despite her unusually imperfect appearance, Yukinoshita was still terrifying. I sought comfort in that familiarity.

"There is nothing more disgusting than spying on an innocent maiden on a rooftop," she said with disgust coloring her tone, "I don't know who you are, creepy stalker-kun, but that is an inconsequential matter. You shall remember nothing of this meeting. Better yet, you never even visited the rooftop during the lunch recess on May 6th. You simply ate lunch in your classroom like a normal, obedient student, and not like some vagrant who decided to head to the roof."

I stared at her in confusion. If I could simply forget or alter events which had occurred in my life, I would have made good use of that ability years ago! Then I would have never even been here in the first place! Also, who are you calling a vagrant? If coming to the roof implied vagrancy then what would that make you?!

I, of course, voiced none of these thoughts.

She crossed her arms, her steely gaze never wavering. Heaven help those who suffer Yukinoshita's wrath. There may be no safe haven from it on Earth.

"Creepy stalker-kun, I understand you are deficient in the intelligence department, so I'll make it easier for you to understand. I'm doing you a favor of sorts here."

Oi, insulting my intelligence is the very opposite of doing me a favor, Yukinoshita! I may be a loner, but I was a smart loner. How else could I have mastered my 108 skills?

"This way, at least you may save whatever shred of dignity you might imagine you have left. We may pretend that you weren't caught sneaking up to the roof for no apparent reason whatsoever just to spy on me."

Don't you think you're taking your hypothetical scenario a bit too far?

"You never decided to leave your classroom for lunch- no, even better, you never even made it to school today. You felt grievously depressed by your pitiful lot in life and so you stayed home today. Our paths did not cross here, and nothing of interest happened. Do I make myself clear?"

I had plenty of things I wanted to say. 'No woman, you can't boss me around,' was one. Or even better: 'If you want this meeting to never see the light of day, I demand two cans of MAX Coffee as payment!' Of course, what came out of my mouth was none of these things.

"Uh…" came my intelligible response. Not my finest moment.

"Do I make myself clear?"

Danger! Yukinoshita's voice had lowered itself by ten decibels! Run!

I nod furiously, as any reasonable man would do.. Anything to escape Nemesis's wrath.

"Well, it seems as though whatever resides within that cranium of yours does have some sense of self-preservation. Make sure to maintain that mindset, creepy stalker-kun. It might benefit you in the future."

I shivered, not even bothering to argue against her awful nickname for me. Her implied threat, that this incident would hang over me in the future, was a chilling one.

"W-well, it was… uh… it was nice seeing you Yukinoshita." I said, backing away towards the stairwell.

Closer… closer…-

"Stop." the cold, quiet voice behind me froze me in my tracks as if I'd run straight into a brick wall.

Oh c'mon! I was so close!

"I do pray, for your sake, that your hasty retreat is not indicative of your nefarious plans to reveal the existence of this imaginary impromptu meeting to another like-minded deviant as yourself?"

"No, ma'am," was my immediate response.

Ma'am? I instinctively recognized her as my superior? Bad Hachiman!

Yukinoshita stared at me for a second longer before turning away; an implicit dismissal as if I were no longer worthy of her continued attention.

I did what any self-respecting, dignified man would do in that situation.

I fled.

oOo

I dawdled for an inordinate amount of time when my last class ended.

You see, last week I turned in my essay on, uh... what was the prompt? A reflection of my youth? Naturally, I answered the prompt as truthfully and succinctly as possible. Needless to say, Hiratsuka-sensei was not happy with me and asked me, or more like forced me with the promise of pain, to see her after today's class.

This was not what I needed today. I had already been terrorized by the resident Ice Queen. I didn't need a second dose from our violent, Christmas Cake of a teacher.

"You look as though you've been through war, Hikigaya." Sensei said upon seeing me enter the teacher's lounge.

Yes, that is what happens to terrified students, Sensei! Now if you had any mercy, you would allow me to leave after seeing me in such a pitiful state!

Naturally, nothing of the sort happened. This wasn't some cheap, budget anime, after all. Real plot development was going to occur, so I didn't get such an easy get-out-of-jail free card.

"Care to explain why? Or should I go into this?" Sensei asked, holding up a rolled up piece of paper that I presumed was my essay.

I shrugged. I didn't particularly want to talk about Yukinoshita, mostly because I myself hadn't made sense of the whole situation.

See, Yukinoshita had long since held the reputation of being the most unapproachable girl in Soubu, a stone wall that forestalled all attempts at establishing any sort of amicable relationship.

If I were to be completely honest, the loner in me kinda admired her for that.

Our brief interactions had only realized such a reputation, yet I couldn't help but wonder if not everything was as it seemed. Observation was one of the essential 108 mastered skills of Hachiman Hikigaya, but in that moment on the roof I didn't need my esteemed organisation observation skills to see that beneath the veneer of calm and collected annoyance, combined with her stinging verbal barbs, there was something clearly very wrong with Yukinoshita.

Sensei quickly brought me out of my thoughts though, in the most violent way possible of course.

Smack!

Ouch! Woman, paper hurts!

"Since you don't want to talk about whatever's bothering you, care to explain this?" She glared at me.

"What do you mean?" I asked, "I don't see anything wrong with that."

I held up my pointer finger. "In fact, this essay meets the requirements of the assignment perfectly; it answers the prompt question, is of required length, and even uses proper grammar!"

Sensei's fist collided with my stomach.

"OUCH!" I sprawled backwards into my seat in pain.

That woman really packed a punch. No wonder nobody would take her as a partner. Who would want domestic abuse on a regular basis in their lives?

"I'll rewrite the essay, Sensei." I groaned out.

"Of course you will, but that's not all you're going to be doing, Hikigaya." she said, sighing dramatically.

"I-huh? What are you talking about?"

"Since you seem to be dead set in your ways, I suppose I must utilize far more drastic measures to correct your philosophies, or else you'll never become a functioning member of society. From today onwards, you'll be joining the school's Service Club."

What are you on about, woman? I will be a perfect, valuable addition to society. My house-husband skills will have all the rich ladies come calling. Hell, could you imagine how rich I could be if I attracted a harem of rich girls? That sounds like the life! Now, sensei, if that's all you wanted to talk about, Vita-chan is waiting for me. I should be getting home.

"I-I think I'm going to go-"

"I always wanted to test out the Annihilating Second Bullet." Sensei cracked her knuckles threateningly.

Self-preservation. Right.

"Uh, I mean, tell me about the Service Club, Sensei." I said, with the best smile I could muster. It must have looked awful though, because she landed the Second Bullet anyways.

At least I was spared from the Exterminating Last Bullet. Probably because I was sprawled out on the ground.

"The Service Club is a club I founded in an attempt to help people like you," she said, and made zero attempts to elaborate.

The place honestly sounded like a sanitarium.

"I really don't think-"

Sensei cracked her knuckles again.

"Yes ma'am, I'll join the club, just lead the way!"

Alas, Vita-chan would have to bear the loss of my presence for a little while longer.

oOo

Sensei slid open the classroom door to an empty classroom. I took a careful look around in case there was someone hiding in the corner, just waiting for me to embarrass myself. It wouldn't be the first time.

"Err, sensei… were you expecting someone?"

"No shit, Sherlock. Now where could she be? It's not like her to skip out on club activities…" Sensei mused to herself.

I took a pause, hoping Sensei would see the issue in her words. Alas, wishful thinking. I guess I would have to soldier onwards, at risk of bodily harm.

"There's nobody here, Sensei."

"Your point?" She said, flipping open her phone and scrolling.

"This is a club… and there's nobody here."

"Yes, that's why I'm looking for the club president." Sensei's stare promised painful things if I didn't shut up. My aching stomach reminded me to keep my mouth shut.

Sensei lifted her phone to her ear, a look of annoyance plastered on her face.

"Yukinoshita?" she asked after a pause.

Oh no. No, no, no. This club… Yukinoshita was the club president? Yukinoshita participated in clubs? Antisocial, demon superwoman extraordinaire Yukinoshita? The same Yukinoshita who had just today terrorized me into being unable to eat my precious lunch?

Which reminded me, I was hungry… No! Focus, Hachiman. How to get out of this situation?

Hiratsuka-sensei's voice rang through the room once more.

"Yes, of course it's me, where are you?"

Her face screwed up in confusion.

"You're sick? But you're never sick! And I saw you earlier today; you looked fine then."

Another pregnant pause followed.

"Alright alright, well, feel better kiddo, and when you get back to school, I'll have your first request. See ya!"

Sensei finally ended her call and turned to me.

"No, I refuse." I said immediately, shaking my head to emphasize my point.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"I refuse to associate myself with- with that ice demon." I retorted. Heaven forbid I spend another second in her presence.

Sensei shot me a disappointed look.

"You know, Hikigaya, I would've expected that you of all people would look beyond simple rumours."

Ouch. That was a low blow, sensei. I told you that information in confidence! Unconsciously, I rubbed my arm where the scars still existed, even after all these years.

"It's not just rumours." I muttered mutinously.

Sensei's eyebrows raised.

"Oh? Have the two of you met?"

"Unfortunately."

"Well! This makes all this easier, then. You will come to the Service Club every day after classes end from now on. Yukinoshita will be in charge of rehabilitating you, so to speak. Got it?"

"Why do I need to be rehabilitated?" I grumbled.

Hiratsuka-sensei's expression softened. "Because Hikigaya, you cannot continue despising the world for what it did to you all those years ago. Society can be cruel; it can hurt you and tear you apart. But there are also benefits to friendship and love, else we wouldn't fight so hard to obtain such lofty ideals."

The way she was talking, it almost sounded like she was talking to herself.

"Yukinoshita may be prickly. She may be difficult to work with. But she will force you to change. She will never give up, for as long as it will take for you to change. This will be beneficial to you in the end, Hikigaya. Think of it as your training arc."

My life isn't a shounen manga, Sensei!

Yet, I had no choice but to agree to her machinations, and that is how I found myself in a club with Yukino Yukinoshita, the very day she terrorized me.

oOo

Of course, since Yukinoshita didn't show up that first day, I didn't see her again until my second day in the club. This was a small blessing, but I'm only saying this to point out that I, a member of the Service Club of only a few minutes, also was the only member attending the club meeting that day.

Brilliant. Just brilliant.

Still, the day was not without its brighter moments. One greeted me as soon as I walked through the door of my home.

"Big bro, how come you're so late today?"

Komachi Hikigaya is a blessing onto this world.

She's too cute for her own good, but it's precisely that cuteness plus her unrelenting emotional support for her older brother that makes reality a little easier to stomach. I don't know what I did to deserve such a little sister, but I'll take it. An overwhelming positive in a life full of negatives, so to speak.

Huh, maybe they do balance out in karmic fashion.

"I had a meeting with Hiratsuka-sensei."

"Ooh, did onii-chan get in trouble again?"

"Your onii-chan wouldn't be getting into trouble with any reasonable, normal teacher. But alas, fate has decided to place me in a class with the most annoying, scary, and insecure teacher in the entire school."

"Oi, onii-chan, that's a bit harsh. She's getting on your case because she cares about you. I mean, you even told her about your past, so what does that say about her?"

Komachi was, as usual, completely correct. Not that I would ever admit that about Hiratsuka-sensei though. That woman is still a menace, no matter what she does.

"Oh, Komachi, I should let you know that I'll be coming home later every day for the foreseeable future now. I joined a club."

The expression of confusion and bewilderment on her face might have hurt my pride just a little bit, if I hadn't already been determined to walk the path of loners.

"Eh? Onii-chan in a club? Did Sensei force you?"

Despite my professed dislike of my being forced into the Service Club, some part of me couldn't help but want to deny that statement. Probably the contrarian in me.

"What's so surprising about that? I'll have you know, I've been a part of a club since I first started high school."

"Eh? Really? Since when? And why haven't you told Komachi?"

"I did tell you! I tell you every day, in fact. It's the Going Home Club. Population: Loners. Club activities include, but are not limited to, leaving campus as soon as classes end, avoiding social gatherings, and telling your sister 'I'm home!'. Ah, that must be high in Hachiman points!"

Komachi's scowl did not disappoint.

"Stupid gomii-chan. Stop being an idiot and tell me about your club!"

I sighed. "Well, you weren't wrong about sensei, at least. She's forced me into a club known as the Service Club."

"Service Club? I've never heard of anything like that. I thought she'd push you into a sports club. Maybe tennis or something."

"Well, I wouldn't be able to tell you what the club was about. I was the only one there today."

"Huh?"

"I won't find out more until tomorrow. I'll be meeting the club president then."

"Where was he today? Why wasn't anyone at the club today?" It seemed that my sister had become suspicious.

I shrugged. "The club president is a girl, and she's the only one in the club, apparently."

"What? How can it be a club if there's only one person in it? Don't they have like minimum member count requirements or something?"

"Beats me. I just came home after Sensei dismissed me. I'll probably figure it out tomorrow. Although knowing who the president is, I'm not surprised she's the only one in the club. Can't imagine anyone else even attempting to get close to that blizzard."

Curiously, I felt a stabbing sense of guilt after I finished my sentence. It felt almost as if I had said something that I should not have said. No, that's not right.

It felt almost as if I had hurt someone with what I had said.

I must be delusional.

"Anyways, your brother is going to go take a bath now." I headed up the stairs as Komachi returned to the kitchen.

Ah, a bath. There is nothing more relaxing than coming home after a tiring day of work and treating oneself to a bath. The hot water soothes the muscles that have gone stiff after sitting upright in a chair at a desk all day. The steam billowing up into your face combined with the hot water feels like a blanket cocooning your entire body in warmth, and it honestly just puts me to sleep. I've nodded off many a time in the bath only to be woken up by my cute little sister splashing water in my face.

Ah. Bliss.

"Quite slothful behaviour, creepy stalker-kun," her voice cut through the silence like a shard of ice.

I jolted upright.

"Y-Yukinoshita?" I choked out.

There she was, leaning against the bathroom wall, staring at me with an unreadable expression on her face.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well one cannot be too careful with the dredges of society, so I decided to come and check up on you. I hope you remember your promise."

"I haven't told anyone anything! I swear!"

She hummed in response, tilting her head slightly.

Oi, you're not Senjougahara, you know?

"Seriously. I haven't said a word!"

"Yes, yes, I'm aware you haven't said anything about our meeting. Make sure you continue to keep your lips sealed," she smiled, but there was no warmth in that expression.

"Why are you here then? You can't have put all that effort into breaking into my house just to 'reinforce the message."

Yes, while her presence certainly was intimidating, it wasn't like I had any plans to blab. Or even someone to blab to.

She laughed, although there was no trace of humour in the sound.

"Hey creepy-stalker-kun, you're quite dense aren't you?"

"What?"

Meanwhile, Yukinoshita was checking her phone.

"Oh it's about time."

Time? Time for what?

I didn't get to voice that thought because suddenly it felt as though my entire head had been submerged in cold water.

"AHHH, I'm drowning! Yukinoshita, what did you do to me?!"

"Wake up, gomii-chan!"

An annoyed Komachi stood over me with a basin in her hands.

She was completely unrepentant after I had finished my spluttering too.

"You need to stop being so lazy, gomii-chan. Dinner was ready an hour ago! And who were you calling out to just now?"

I looked around the room wildly but Yukinoshita was nowhere to be found. Had it all been a dream? But if it had been a dream, why did this uncomfortable feeling linger?

"What's wrong, onii-chan, you look as though you've seen a ghost!"

"Maybe I have," I murmured.

"What was that?"

"I said nothing. Let's go eat."

oOo

不要期待我