Rating: T for language, Raph will be Raph after all.
Disclaimer: Only in my delusions, which began around 1991, do they belong to me. In reality, TMNT and all related characters currently belong to Nickelodeon.
Warnings: Little bit of foul language and mentions of past character death.
Summary: Lost and alone in another reality, one turtle must try to find his way home. All while trying to forge a place amongst a family who lost one of their own under horrible circumstances and seemingly resents his very presence. No OC's. Set: 2k3 up until 'Good Genes'. 2k12 up until 'The Good, the Bad and Casey Jones'.
Comments, thoughts and concrit is always welcome.
A/N:
I'm Australian. I, therefore, do not use American English. Please bear that in mind if you see words like colour instead of color. Also, I don't really have anyone I can ask to Beta so this is un-betaed, sorry. If anyone would like to Beta for me, please feel free to contact me.
Reviews and ConCrit are always welcomed and appreciated.
This story has a full, detailed synopsis, just needs fleshing and typing, (I have been busy in the last couple of weeks, haha) so it will be completed and this is likely to be the first in a series.
And One to Grow On
The worst thing you can try to do is cling to something that is gone or to recreate it. - Johnette Napolitano
Prologue:
21st August
Raphael had always had a temper. In fact, he was known for it but that didn't mean he was always angry, the reality was actually far from it. However, if one were to question him right now about it, he would be hard-pressed to remember the last time he wasn't filled with an almost blinding rage at himself, his brothers and at the world.
Fuelled by fury, he pounded across the rooftops searching for trouble like he did the vast majority of nights nowadays. As he ran, he felt an almost forgotten loneliness sneak its timid head up to peak out through a tiny crack within his swelling rage only to duck down again as fast as it had appeared, as if in fear for its very existence. From his vantage point on the high rise buildings, Raphael peered desperately into the night.
Where the hell were all the lowlifes that plagued this city when you really needed them.
He needed to feel like himself once more and he knew that that was never going to happen again. Not since that night...
… that night when...
He still felt chills when he remembered the screams of despair and anguish coming from his brother that terrible night so many months ago.
He squeezed his eyes tightly closed as he tried to push that scarring memory from his mind.
A sound caught his attention from below in a nearby alley and Raphael turned his head, suddenly aware. His face twisted into an almost feral grin, eager to spend some of his mood on someone well-deserving as he ran to the edge of the building which he stood upon and dropped his way down, catching himself on various window sills and pipes just often enough on the way to the ground below to avoid injury. He spied a small group of young men wearing gang colours, not one he really recognised, not that it even mattered to him, surrounding a woman who looked to be in maybe her mid-twenties. Somewhere at the back of his mind, he noticed her terror but he didn't really care enough about anything anymore to take it into consideration.
The turtle growled a warning as he approached the group from the shadows, noting with a dark pleasure the looks of fear filling the young gang members' faces as they turned to face him; the being they had only previously considered to be a dark fable haunting this city. He twirled his sais slowly, lazily, daring them to come at him and they did not disappoint. Raphael allowed them to get close, surrounding him, let them swing their makeshift weapons of pipes, bats and in a couple of cases, knives. He allowed them the first move, taking their hits just to drive home that he could, knowing they were too pathetic to actually hurt him so easily and not really caring besides.
"Pissweak!" he growled in a low tone, delighting in the way the punks started at the sound of his rough spoken voice before bursting into a flurry of movement, kicking and punching, slashing and slamming the pommel of his weapons into their soft, tender bodies.
Raphael was dimly aware of the woman screeching with terror as she ran desperately for her life while he took out his incessant rage on her various attackers. Before he was even fully aware of it, all the pathetic lowlifes were down on the ground, unconscious or panting and moaning in pain and fear. Raph sneered at them. they had barely made a dent in his ire, almost nothing did these days.
He made his way back to the rooftop, pulling his way speedily up a nearby fire escape. Wondering dimly at the pain in his left arm, he realised that one of the knife wielders had actually gotten lucky. Raph fingered the cut carefully, inspecting it and was vaguely relieved that it wasn't deep and wouldn't even require stitches. He decided he may as well just ignore it until he got home around dawn and returned to pounding across the rooftops once more.
-:-
"Raph! Come on, man," Raphael heard a familiar but tired voice reach his ears. "Call it a night bro, just this once!"
He turned to face the caller, annoyance plastered in plain view across his face. "Fuck, Casey, just leave me alone already!" he snarled his displeasure, "I'm sick of you comin' after me nearly every damn night!"
"Someone's gotta... You don't have to go home, just come to my place, share a couple a beers, hang out with me!" the panting human in the hockey mask implored desperately as he approached the red bandanna wearing turtle. "Like you used to before..."
"Dammit Case! I said just leave me alone! Get the fucking hint! I gotta be out here so I don't hurt anyone I care about!" Raphael exploded, twisting to move away again and wishing that his friend would just understand already.
"You're already hurtin' them. Every time you take on the scum of the city alone! Keep this up, Raph an' you're gonna get seriously hurt or killed!" Casey reached out to put a hand on the turtle's arm as he pleaded. "There's already been enough loss as it is."
"For fuck's sake, Case! Don't you dare try an' guilt me!" Raphael snapped, whirling around to face Casey, his fury bubbling up uncontrollably as he reacted badly to his friend's touch. Without realising what he was doing, Raph found himself shoving his best friend away violently, pushing him off balance. As Casey fell painfully to the rooftop surface, Raph was aware with growing horror that he could have really hurt his friend badly and the guilt and anger at himself overwhelmed him. He stood staring in shock just long enough to ascertain that Casey was thankfully okay before stuttering a rushed apology and running.
He couldn't stay there!
He couldn't risk accidentally hurting his friend again.
He needed to work this anger out before it completely consumed him and he hurt one of the remaining few people he loved.
But he didn't know how. Nothing was right anymore. Everything was completely unbalanced with him gone...
Raphael ran for what felt like hours until he was exhausted and collapsed to his hands and knees on the rooftop panting. After a few minutes, he looked up at the cloudy, moonlit sky and screamed his pain, his rage, his frustration and most of all his grief until he ran out of breath. Finally spent, he hung his head, just breathing, in and out, over and over.
Sometime later, though he didn't know how much as he had long since lost track of time, Raph felt the sudden need to lift his head, turn and stare into the distance. He really wasn't sure what it was that gave him the urge to do so but he obeyed his instinct anyway and what he saw chilled him.
There was someone out there, on the far rooftop and he could tell it wasn't Foot. Raphael squinted into the night, he needed a clearer look but the figure was too far away. He clambered unsteadily to his feet, limbs still shaky from his relentless run and started moving slowly in the direction of the figure. His eyes widened in surprise as he froze to the spot.
He could have sworn it was someone on a skateboard...
And that it was another turtle, though, the silhouette looked wrong...
But his remaining brothers almost never left the lair anymore, unless they absolutely had to.
Raphael continued to stare from his vantage point at the edge of the rooftop and suddenly started as he saw a brief flash of colour in the pale light of the half-moon as it ducked out from behind the clouds.
Before he even realised it, Raphael was vaulting to the next rooftop and sprinting across the buildings faster than he had ever run before. However. before he could catch up, the figure, still on its skateboard, jumped over the side of the building, disappearing from Raphael's sight as if it had never even been there in the first place.
-:-
