7 Steps on How to Court Shiho Hahnenfuss

Prologue

foureyesfreak27

Summary: Post-GSD. Step #1; Get to know her. Before making any initial moves, you should get to know your woman very well in order for you to court her properly.

In which Yzak Joule has little to no clue on how to court the woman he's been betrothed to for ages.

Beta-ed by: The amazing SIA345. (Thank you!)

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed/Destiny.


.

Yzak Joule, heir to the prominent Joule Clan of PLANTs and well-respected Commander of the two Nazca-class destroyers Voltaire and Rousseau, was not in a pleasant mood.

In fact, being crabby would be an understatement. He was enraged.

After serving under the ZAFT Forces for as long as he could remember, and surviving through two gruesome Bloody Valentine Wars, one would think that nothing can faze the fierce White Coat Commander. Well, it's true, nothing really can. He had earned many medallions and achieved numerous titles during his duration in the ZAFT Forces. He was well-known for being a hot-tempered and strict commander who ruled his team with an iron fist. He proudly wore the ZAFT white uniform since he was a part of the handful number of people under the age of thirty who have received such a prestigious honor. He was, after all, at the tender age of nineteen when he received the uniform and title of Commander. There were already rumors circulating around the military and the council of him being promoted to General and running for a seat representing Martius City—a position that was preceded by his mother—in the PLANT Supreme Council during the upcoming election. So far in his life, his odds have never been any better.

Truthfully, nothing can really daunt or flabbergast the ZAFT Commander…

Or so he thought.

Honestly, today, the odds were not in his favor. His downfall has started quite early in the day, perhaps it was the moment he'd arrived at his office this morning. Actually, scratch that, it all started in his favorite coffee shop. He grimaced bitterly. Yes, of course. The coffee shop. That's how his accursed day had started.

Every morning before he reports himself to the ZAFT Military Headquarters, he would stop by this specific coffee shop in Aprilius Four to get his morning fuel. He particularly favored this coffeehouse solely because their coffees were made fresh and didn't taste like those vile watered-down black liquids that those big coffeehouse franchises produced. According to their story, the coffee beans were carefully treated and organically grown in the United States of South America. The smell of the dark tantalizing aroma was quite addictive and it doesn't hurt that the coffee tasted exceptionally exquisite. In addition, for being a regular customer and an infamous ZAFT soldier, he was given a bonus of having free muffins to go along with his hot drink (a handsome gesture of which he certainly was not complaining about).

But somehow, this particular day, his favorite barista/server was not present at the coffee shop, an unusual situation that he was not accustomed to. He asked the whereabouts of his favorite orange-haired barista to the new face behind the counter and was given the answer that he had called in sick this morning.

Yzak frowned.

Although he can say that this unexpected abruptness was something he was not happy about, he cannot condemn his favorite barista for being human. He's bound to be on sick leave sometimes in his life. Unfortunately, for him at least, the orange-haired barista—he failed to learn his name even though he sees him every morning—was the only one save the barely-present manager who knew how to make his coffee since the Joule heir was one picky man.

The newly staffed teenager behind the counter assured him that the regular barista had left specific instructions on how to make their special customer's favorite hot drink, something which pleased the ZAFT Commander immensely. So, after hearing this information, he thought that he ought to give the teen a chance. She was, after all, entrusted by his favorite barista to make his morning coffee.

A mistake that he thoroughly regretted after taking one simple sip of the hot cup.

The new girl: the stupid, idiotic, bubbly, ungodly cheery, airheaded wretch had ruined his morning coffee. The disastrously uncombined vile flavor that was enriched in his hot drink was an abomination to all coffee lovers. He would trade anything in this world to get the disgusting drink away from him. Right now, he'd happily have one of former Commander Andrew Waltfeld's infamous coffee brews for that had been much better than this crap. Unfortunately, the former ZAFT Commander had decided to live his retirement days in Orb, and it was there he had opened his coffee brewery. He made a mental note to himself to visit that old man the next time he went to Orb on business and enjoy a taste of his fine freshly brewed coffee.

And who can forget the muffins. Oh god, how he dreaded the tasteless nourishment that the evil woman handed him: those cold, flavorless, undercooked, half-baked, so-called blueberry muffins. Good god, was she trying to kill him?

He threw the offensive nourishments in the bin but not before he gave a few good scornful parting words to the insolent girl. Because of this, he had scowled his way to work, glaring at anyone who stood in his way.

And of course, the morning had to just get even worse.

Much to his chagrin, the moment he stepped foot inside his private domain, he was immediately greeted by an enormous pile of papers neatly stacked on top of his desk. This would have been a comical situation if it were to be seen in a movie, but unfortunately this was reality, and the silver-haired Commander was not amused. He took one good look at one document on top of the pile of mess and grimaced in remembrance. Of course, how could he have forgotten about the newly recruits that were going to be assigned to his squadron by the end of the month. As the Commander of his team, he had the deplorable task of reading through the documents, deciding whether or not to approve the individuals who were possibly assign to his crew. But part of the task that he thoroughly enjoyed doing was stamping the 'reject' and 'approve' ink to the documents.

Sighing in irritation, he sat on his seat and proceeded to the inevitable by going through the documents one by one.

But yet, his disastrous day didn't stop there.

Before he had the chance to enjoy his hour-long lunch break, he was abruptly interrupted by a ZAFT Green soldier outside his private domain. A rude awakening if he might add. According to the insolent fool, he was to report to the ZAFT Military Academy immediately—the fool had stammered much to his displeasure—and he was in no position to deny this request. Hearing the latter part of the statement, he asked—perhaps it was more like shouting, but who gives a damn—the subordinate who in their right mind had requested him to do such an atrocious thing before he attends his break and was given the answer that General Dunner had assigned him to such a tedious task.

He gritted his teeth. Of course, he would. That blasted potentate he had the unfortunate of being assigned under was the exact replica of his own Captain; Dearka Elsman. Both General and Captain have an uncanny resemblance of having annoying pastimes like needling and prying. His General knew him so well that he would have the audacity to put him up to lecture a school full of arrogant students as a guest speaker—something that the silver-haired absolutely cannot tolerate doing. But being the good soldier he was, he made no objection—sucked up all his hatred for the task—and made his way towards the Academy.

Nope, the catastrophic events kept on going strong.

After his two long hours of the extremely dreary meeting with the other ZAFT commanders in the late afternoon, he hastily marched to his office, and locked the door in the hope of preventing anymore interference from the troublesome world. He noticed that the atrocious pile of documents that were breeding on top of his desk had unsurprisingly lessened. He knew that his most trusted subordinate Hahnenfuss—bless her soul—had the decency to eliminate those repugnant documents and send them to their designated functions.

But put aside all the misfortunes that he had encountered today, this one in particular tops the list.

He inwardly shuddered. Ugh, just thinking about it gives him chills, all because of that horrendous voicemail.

Habitually after working long hours outside his office, he would listen to his voicemails that he'd received throughout the day.

But after hearing the latest news, his crabby disposition took quite a turn for the worse. Nothing had ever made him feel so…conflicted. It was a clear understanding that he was in no position to negate the matter that was placed—mind you, it was quite a heavy burden one—on him. Never in his twenty-three years, and counting, of being alive had he been…threatened. Yes, that's the appropriate term for this; threatened. He was baffled to no end and quite frankly, wasn't sure whether or not this was some sort of a sick game, but by some means it had given him quite a good shake.

At first, he believed that it was another one of her bullying antics that she would terrorize him with in order for him to heed her outlandish requests. Truth be told, it was neither the first, nor he anticipated it to be the last. But somehow this time, after hearing the scornful message, he felt unease, because, behind the tranquil alluring voice lurks another cryptic message. A cautionary warning, a bad omen. The warning siren on the back of his head was already wailing in distress.

He tugged on his collar as his neck began to chafe from the sudden chills he felt crawling down his spine. A clear discomfort that he's not accustomed to, but much to his inclination, he had no other choice. This matter was akin to a life and death situation. To be frank, he would rather face a hundred of those stupid Earth Alliance's G-weapons than to go through the hazardous thing that every single male faced when being constantly pestered by their primary caregiver. Perhaps this was what his other male colleagues had referred to: a mid-life crisis.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that something like this would come. It was an inevitable matter for someone like him with status to escape from but still, it had taken quite a toll on his emotional equilibrium.

Two sharp knocks brought him back to reality. He shook his head, almost as if it was some sort of a pep talk to himself before pressing the intercom. He didn't need to say anything for the intruder was the one and only friend, aside from his trusted subordinate, who happens to put up with his short-tempered attitude.

"Yo," his ever ungodly cheery second commander, Dearka Elsman, greeted through the screen. Without a second thought, Yzak gave him the green light to enter his private domain.

"Hey there, buddy," the Black Coat lazily greeted once again as he casually strolled inside his office.

Yzak grunted incoherently in response, not taking his eyes away from the paperwork before him. He needed some sort of distraction. A good distraction. Paperwork was good; an excellent irony since before this, he abhorred them to no end. And having Dearka in his office—a situation that he loathed, knowing that the blonde was a peeve to him—tediously annoying the crap out of him would be a big bonus.

"You know, you're visibly sulking," Dearka noted lightly, noticing his friend's dark mood and the frown that he wore.

"And? So what if I am?" Yzak spat angrily, slamming a finished set of documents on top of the completed stack. Trust Dearka to pick on a topic that he deems important.

The good captain chuckled in amusement, unfazed by Yzak's irascible demeanor. "It's almost as if someone has taken your favorite toy away from you. No wonder everyone seems like they're avoiding your office," the Black Coat Captain pointed out, slouching against the wall behind him.

"Hn, good. It's better than being constantly around idiotic people," he replied, begrudgingly. Now if he'd just change the topic, he'd be quite useful in here.

Dearka raised a quizzical eyebrow. He had always known that Yzak preferred to be left alone when working—with the exception of working on the battlefield—but he'd never make such an anti-social comment. Something, or perhaps most likely a certain someone, had made him all crabby today, and the tanned blond had a sharp nagging feeling on who it might just be. "O-kay, tell me what happened, buddy? Don't tell me Shiho did something that pissed you off."

Yzak stopped writing to give his blond friend a flat look. "Why do you always assume that whenever I'm in a bad mood it always has to be related to Hahnenfuss?" In a way, it does, but the pestering blond would always make comments like these to further push his buttons.

The tanned blond shrugged indifferently as he crossed his arms. He nonchalantly smirked as if he knew the obvious culprit who's responsible for the silver-head's bitter mood. "Well? Was I right?"

His commander sent him a warning glare before responding. "No," Yzak corrected. "It's not." Not likely, at least.

Dearka quirked a knowing brow, not believing his friend one bit. "Uh huh. Then pray, tell. Who has left you in such an unpleasant mood?"

Damn, Dearka. The damn blond was taunting him; there was no doubt about it. He would always manage to irk the Joule heir and would repeatedly disregard the fact that the latter was his superior. The fact that the ZAFT Black Coat Captain knew this well enough did not stop his endless tease of his silver-haired Commander, for he knew very well that Yzak needed him. He was one of the few whom the silver-head trusted, an averse reason why the silver-haired Commander hadn't booted his behind out of his squadron as of yet. Yzak released a sigh, might as well let it all out now then to let it bubble up inside. "It's my mother," he grunted in irritation.

The blond blinked owlishly, immediately straightening himself from his slouch position after hearing his statement. "Your mother?" Dearka parroted in confusion.

"Yes, my mother," the White Coat repeated, growling in ire. "Now, drop the subject."

Knowing Dearka very well, the blond would ignore this request and continue to press on the subject. So it did not surprise him if the blond were to pry in his business, again. "What did she do? Don't tell me she interfered in your love life again, or the lack thereof?" He jokingly ventured.

Of course, Elsman just knew him so goddamn well. Whenever it's regarding his mother, the topic of 'relationship' would always be brought up somehow.

Noting how the silver-haired Commander's mood visibly darkened, Dearka knew he had hit the nail on the head. He burst into a fit of laughter in which Yzak responded by throwing a pen at him (which Dearka easily dodged of course).

"Oh Yzak, what did she say this time?" Dearka wondered in amusement, still laughing at the comical situation.

The White Coat growled in irritation but nevertheless he spilled his reasons for his current mood. "She reminded me that I was getting close to the age of twenty-five and it was high time for me to settle down and start producing offspring for the Joule family."

Figured, Dearka thought comically. "And how did you respond?"

"I didn't. She left a voicemail," was his simple answer.

"Well, It's not like you've handled her threats before," Dearka reminded him with an inwardly shrug as he walked across the room to lounged himself comfortably on the sofa.

Yzak scoffed. "Well if you count being threatened to be disowned by the family, deprived of your own inheritance, and demoted back to a Red Coat by your General, since she has connections, is okay, then you are absurd. In addition, she already planned a wedding date and would castrate me alive if I don't show up at the alter."

His blond friend blinked rapidly, clearly startled by the information. "Oh," was all he could come up with. No wonder he was in such an unpleasant mood.

"Yeah. Oh." Yzak repeated, rolling his eyes.

"So she's really serious this time, giving you the ultimatum and all," the Black Coat Captain whistled lowly. He pondered on the possible thought of his best friend settling down and visibly cringed. He pitied the poor girl who'll be saddled up with a hot-tempered man like Yzak. Quite frankly, the blond couldn't quite picture Yzak courting a woman, and if he does, it will be one hell of a show that he'll eagerly await with front row tickets.

Now that Yzak mentioned 'marriage', he couldn't help but to recall a vague memory sometime a while back during the Academy days when Yzak begrudgingly mentioned something about being betrothed to a Hahnenfuss. "But hey, aren't you betrothed to Shiho?"

"And, what of it?" Again with Hahnenfuss?

Dearka rolled his eyes to his oblivious friend. He may be an excellent commander but truly the man was naïve when it came to love. "Shouldn't you just accept the engagement and just go on and marry her?"

"Absolutely not," was his immediate reply, a frown graced his face.

"And why not?" Dearka inquired, reflecting his friend's frown. Racking up his memories, the only girl that Yzak seems to tolerate in this surprisingly-large-number-of-females-infiltrated-place was Shiho, who ironically was, his betroth. Call him a matchmaker, but he honestly thinks that a woman like Shiho would be good for the Joule heir. A strong willed woman who's very opinionated and she can practically tame the silver-haired beast. And mind you, not many people can actually succeed in doing such suicidal thing—let alone stand being around him without pissing their pants—save himself and Shiho, of course.

"Hahnenfuss and I have a very professional relationship. We are not romantically involved with one another," the Joule heir logically declared, leaving no room for arguments. "Besides, I'm too young to be settling down."

"Well let me remind you that your mother threatened to disown you, Yzak."

"So what do you suggest me to do? Marry Hahnenfuss? I may be a hard Commander but I do have a heart. I am not insensitive enough to not consider Hahnenfuss's feelings and force her into a union with someone she does not love."

Dearka choked at that. By holy, the man was a total ditz when it comes to love. Was he that oblivious that the Red Coat brunette has been pinning on him for as long as he could remember? He did not know whether or not he should pity Shiho for falling for such a blind man. But the power of love was something that cannot be explained through words, hence, people just fall in love sometimes without knowing that they're already in love. Take his love life for example, he just so happened to be irrevocably in love with his Natural girlfriend, Miriallia. If the cocky seventeen year old Dearka would've known back then that he'd ended up with a Natural, he would've scoffed at the absurd notion. But now that he's been with her for quite a long time, he cannot imagine a future without her.

"Well then, have you ever asked her about how she felt being engaged to the likes of you?" Somehow by the look on Yzak's face, Dearka already knew the answer. That blank look spoke for itself.

The White Coat Commander seemed to ponder the thought, trying to recall any memories of any conversations he and his Red Coat subordinate had regarding their engagement. "I don't recall," he honestly confessed.

The Black Coat rolled his eyes. No surprise there. He'd probably be conversing about anything related to the military save their apparent engagement. "Well then just marry her already. You've been engaged to one another for god knows how long. Why don't you go talk to her so you can get your mother off of your back?"

"Just because you're happily in a relationship with your Natural girlfriend, it does not give you the right to criticize my lack of love life," Yzak seethed in annoyance, glaring at his captain in question.

Dearka raised his hands defensively. "I'm just trying to help. Besides, Shiho is not against the arranged marriage like you are."

Yzak frowned. "How would you know?" He questioned with skepticism.

"Trust me, buddy. I know," Dearka confidently assured the silver-haired, giving him his trademark smirk.

Yzak scoffed in disbelief. "You have no evidence to support your baseless logic."

Dearka shook his head at his friend's stubbornness. Jeez, how can one of ZAFT's most exemplary commanders be so thickheaded? "I really don't see any valid reason why you should oppose the engagement. I know for a fact Shiho is not against it but why are you so adamant on breaking it off? It's a win-win situation for the both of you."

Yzak glared at the mischievous blond in annoyance. "Are you an idiot, Elsman? I told you already, I just don't want her to be with someone she does not like," he repeated once again in irritation, scowling.

An epiphany came to mind. "Ah, so in other words, you care for her," Dearka surmised, smiling slyly.

"As her Commander, I am inclined to care about her well-being," he corrected the tanned blond, dismissing the suggestive look his companion was giving him.

Dearka let out a long exasperated sigh. Sometimes he couldn't help but pity the poor fool who'd fall in love with his best friend, most notably Shiho. "Well how about this: court her."

"Excuse me?" Yzak spluttered, clearly caught off guard by the suggestion.

The Black Coat shrugged. "You know, dating, courting, same thing. Courting is when—"

"I know what the goddamn word means, Elsman. What I'm trying to understand is why would you suggest such a preposterous idea in the first place? I told you my reasons for backing off so kindly shut your trap," Yzak warningly stated.

Dearka frowned once again. "You didn't let me finish."

"There's no reason needed," he flatly responded.

"No, you dimwit," Dearka retaliated. A retort was already forming in Yzak's mouth but was quickly halted by a flash of pen thrown at him. "Shut up and let me finish."

Yzak wisely kept his mouth shut but nonetheless scowled at him. How dare he throw a pen at his commanding officer?

"Good boy," Dearka zealously chimed. Yzak gave him a warning look as if cautioning his friend to not overstep his boundaries as an underling, but the blond ignored it and continued. "What I'm trying to say is why don't you try it with Shiho first. Give it a shot. Perhaps your relationship with her will eventually become something more than of professional level. You respect her, she respects you. Court her, win her heart, heck charm her with flowers for all I care. At the end of the day, who knows, maybe she'll step out of the boundary of only being your subordinate and come to like you as a person."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you doing this?" The silver-haired Commander rephrased curiously.

"Trust me, you'll be thanking me later. I'll let you know, she's not seeing anyone at this moment at least. Fortunately for you, this'll make it easier to court her." And Shiho, too, of course.

The silver-head could only stare at the said tanned blond, slightly perplexed that he was actually attempting to try and help instead of relentlessly teasing him.

"You'll be needing this." Dearka fished his target object in his inside jacket pocket. He pulled the object and present to Yzak what it looks like a booklet. The Elsman heir grinned before throwing the booklet to Yzak, in which the latter easily caught with one hand before dropping it back down on his desk.

"What is this?" Yzak asked furrowing his brows as he examined the thin booklet on his desk, almost treating it as if it was a vile object.

"Something to guide you with your courtship. You may be one of the best commanders we have, but when it comes to courting a woman, face it, Yzak, you lack knowledge in that department."

The silver-haired Commander narrowed his eyes dangerously. "You, my mother put you up for this, didn't she?" It was rather more of a statement of accusation than a question. It was not a coincidence that the Black Coat Captain just so happened to be carrying such a book around in his pocket. In the military, there's no such thing as coincidence.

The tanned blond winked knowingly. "Good luck, buddy. You're going to need it. Let me know if you need some pointers!" He waved a goodbye to his superior officer before prancing out of the room.

"Damn that Elsman," Yzak mumbled under his breath. "I don't need his help." His gaze fell back to the red book that was thrown to him. A look of contemplation fell on his face. Should he actually go along with what Dearka had suggested? Honestly, he wasn't so sure if Hahnenfuss still wanted to marry someone like him despite being betrothed to one another for as long as he could remember. He respected her as a solider and an ace pilot, but anything beyond that was unimaginable.

"Oh, what the hell," Yzak muttered apathetically. Perhaps reading it wouldn't hurt. After all, as much as he hates to admit, the blasted Dearka was right. He knew nothing about women, let alone how to court one. If courting Hahnenfuss would stop his pestering mother from nagging him, then so be it. He'll court Hahnenfuss to please his mother.

He sighed as he opened the blasted cursed book in front of him. Well, here goes nothing. "'7 Steps on How to Court Your Lady'…What a nonsensical title."


A/N: Reviews? Thanks for reading!