Well its been ages since I've posted on here. yes all the previous chapters have been deleted. yes some of the plot stuff has changed. I have felt I've gotten better at writing since I started working on this and wanted to take my third try at this (at least I think I've tried writing this like three times but whatever)

Yes this will be posted on ao3 under the same name and same user (kinda only slight differences, but whatever)

This will be a slow update fic, but I will never drop it completely, hopefully, unless something really bad happened. My life is just so hectic that its hard to find time to write as long of chapters as I want to.

Once again thank you guys for all the support with this fic and I hope you still enjoy it.


He could hear the quiet mutterings of the crowd as he stood on stage waiting for the Agni Kai to start. As quiet as they were it was deafening to him. Zuko took deep breaths to steady himself as he prepared to face his opponent. A drop of sweat slid down his face as he felt his nervousness rise up. His opponent had more experience, but was old and would be slower and had not actually fought in years.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Uncle Iroh sitting in the crowd. His face schooled to show nothing, but his eyes shined with worry. They had talked after the war meeting that caused this whole event. Uncle had tried to give some advice as well as tell him how foolish it was, but he had to do this. He made the choice and now it was time to follow through with it.

His sister was next to his uncle too. Her face never changed from the ever present smirk. A smirk that didn't look misplaced on that eleven year old girl as he had seen it for years. How he hated that look. Azula was cruel and excited to see how this would turn out. She had teased him beforehand. Saying how he'll lose for sure and how much of a disappointment he'll prove to be in front of the entire Fire Nation. He had to prove her wrong.

"Begin!" was called out and Zuko spun around to face his opponent, throwing the traditional cloth off him.

There standing across the stage from him was not the old general he had thought he was to face. No standing there was his own father, the Fire Lord. Zuko was shocked and stared at his father who took a few menacing steps forward.

The Fire Lord! Why was he his opponent?! No this couldn't be right. The Fire Lord was one of, if not THE best firebender in the nation. It was expected of the royal family to master their flames. That would mean certain death. To bend against the Fire Lord would be treason, but this was an Agni Kai.

"Please, Father! I only had the Fire Nation's best interest at heart! I'm sorry I spoke out of turn!" Zuko begged his father looking to the ground, terrified of what would happen.

His father was not a merciful person and to face him would end with him injured or worse.

"You will fight for your honor," the Fire Lord stated, the crowd watching in anticipation as he approached his son.

Zuko knelt on the ground, bowing to his father hoping to appease him. Anything to try and stop his impending doom.

"I meant you no disrespect. I am your loyal son," Zuko begged, glancing up at the imposing figure coming his way before bowing again.

He could feel tears pricking in his eyes as his panic grew in his chest. There was no way of getting out of this, was there?

"Rise and fight, Prince Zuko!" Fire Lord Ozai commanded.

"I won't fight you," Zuko declared strongly even as tears streamed down his cheeks.

How weak he must look, bowing on the ground crying. There was no way he could fight his father. He was his father! No matter how mean he was Zuko loved him and wanted to make him proud. Not face him in an Agni Kai.

"You will learn respect, and suffering will be your teacher," Ozai spoke, creating a ball of fire in his hand.

Zuko looked up only to have his father grab his head by his hair and hold his hand over his left eye. Eyes widened as the hand heated up before suddenly a flame bloomed over his face. The scream that tore from his throat was almost inhuman. The pain was so terrible it was the only thing Zuko could focus on. It seemed to last an eternity until his father finally pulled away, letting him drop to the ground covering the burn. Zuko sobbed as he slowly lost consciousness, the darkness welcoming.

His consciousness faded in and out as he was placed in the infirmary. People were hurrying around him as they placed something cold and wet on his face, the pain numbing away. Something soft covered the numb area as people touched him. There wasn't anything he could do as they moved around bandaging his face as he drifted on and off.

He barely even registered when someone had changed him out of the Agni Kai clothes and into the basic infirmary shirt and pants. His mind was full of fuzz and pain. There were so many hands and people touching him and talking. He couldn't make anything out, it was all a blur as someone forced his mouth open and made him drink something.

Zuko started to drift off again as people began to shout. He couldn't make out any words, head full of cotton. Suddenly there were shouts and too many hands on him. They felt like they were everywhere and the sluggishly he tried to understand as the medicine he was given pushed him back into a world of black. Everything was spinning and melding together.

He must have blacked out at some point because the next thing Zuko knew he was on a ship, his father standing in front of his delirious self. He was being held up at first by two men before they made him stand, supported only by the ship's railing.

"Prince Zuko, you are hereby banished for refusing to fight. You have shown shameful weakness and hold no honor in your refusal. You must capture the avatar to regain your honor and return home," Fire Lord Ozai commanded. "You will not sail or step foot onto the Fire Nation. Now begon."

The Fire Lord turned away and the ship moved. The metal creaked as the waves carried it farther and farther from port. Zuko stood staring at the place he once called home, never allowed to return. His mind still muddled, but fully understanding what just happened.

He couldn't stop the tears that fell as he watched it become smaller and smaller. He was only 13. He was a child and now all alone. How was he supposed to find someone who hadn't been seen in a hundred years.

If he could have, Zuko would have stood there for hours watching his home disappear into the distance. His body refused and soon the two men were dragging him into the ship. His legs were too weak to hold his body up as the medicine still worked through his body. By the time the crew had taken him to wherever he was to stay, Zuko was already passed out from that day's events.

The days passed in a haze of pain and darkness. Whatever room he was kept in was small and smelled like mildew and rot. It was always uncomfortably hot, thought that might have been the fever that settled into his body. Zuko lost track of the days, unable to tell how long he had been passed out for. Only a few times did someone come check up on him. The man would force him to eat and drink, but never stayed for long.

At one time Zuko staggered to his feet deliriously. His face throbbed and his throat burned for water while his stomach ached for food. Stumbling to the door, he opened it without issue. In the back of his mind he knew that something was off at not seeing anyone, in the halls. Stumbling his way through the ship he finally ran into a member of the crew.

"What are you doing here?!" The man shouted.

Zuko winced his head pounding as he mumbled something about water.

"Oh just water huh? I'll get you some water, your highness," the man sneered, roughly grabbing Zuko by the arm.

The man dragged Zuko through the ship and up on deck. The cooler air felt good on his feverish skin, but he also shook from chills his body forced. Several other men were gathered around and sneered seeing the disheveled prince. The man dragged him over to an open water barrel and shoved the limp prince's head into the cold water.

Zuko thrashed, the water startling him more aware. The man pressed hard keeping his head under for what felt like hours. Zuko, weak and sick, slowed his moments as his body struggled to not breathe. Finally the man let him up. Gasping for air he slumped down on the ground.

"How's that for water?" the man sneered as the rest laughed. "That'll teach you to try and escape."

"How about we break his leg? Stop him from ever trying again?" someone in the crowd shouted.

A cheer went out in the crowd as many agreed. Grabbing Zuko again, the man threw him into the middle of the deck allowing the crowd at him. Zuko could only curl up trying to protect himself against the larger, older, and stronger men. There were too many hands on him and shouting all around. His leg was pulled away and someone slammed down on it, with a tool,a foot, or something. There was a loud crack and snap making Zuko scream out in pain. The men cheered as they backed away leaving the injured boy on the ground.

Pain wracked his body, his lungs hurt and his leg pulsed with pain to rival his face. Someone grabbed him and dragged him back under. Zuko winced as he was harshly thrown back into his room without a care. The hot air around him felt suffocating as he tried to block out the pain, trying to will himself unconscious.

The door creaked open after what felt like hours. The light that shined in the cell blinded him before it was quickly closed. The person who entered quickly lit their palm with a single flame allowing him to see.

"Who-" Zuko croaked out before his body was wracked with coughs. His head still felt fuzzy and like he was drifting away from his body.

The man held a single finger to his lip, glancing back at the door. It was silent and neither moved for a few minutes. Finally the man started to move, pulling things out of his pocket. There were jars of cream and bandages, a water skin and bits of food.

Zuko didn't move as the man kneeling by him started to put the creams on his eye before wrapping it tightly. He moved quickly to his leg, looking it over. Zuko tried to hold in moans of pain, biting his lip hard when it was twisted the wrong way as the man treated it. He stared at him as he worked watching him for any sign that he would turn on him like the other had.

"Prince Zuko," the man finally spoke in a low whisper. "I apologize for what has happened and being unable to stop it."

"Who-" Zuko cut himself off with a loud cough. "Who are you?"

"My name is Lee. The crew was hired to not help you, but to take you as far as possible and then kill you," Lee explained, holding the water to his mouth. Zuko took a slow drink trying not to inhale it. "I did not want to, but the Fire Lord ordered it. He wants your death to be seen as a strike by one of the opposing nations. I will do my best to get you out. I promise you will live."

Lee had slowly helped Zuko eat what little food he could stomach, but it churned as he listened to what Lee was saying. His own father wanted him dead. The only use he was to his nation was as a piece to be discarded and thrown away to continue the war. His own father didn't even want to give him a chance to prove he could be useful.

Lee packed up the supplies and took the water skin. He quickly left, leaving Zuko left in the dark once again as Lee shut the door and secured it. Curling up, Zuko let his exhaustion and pain take over, dragging him to unconsciousness. His dreams weren't any better, dark and full of fire and pain.

He wasn't sure how long passed, but Lee would come every so often to check on him. They didn't talk much as Zuko's eye soon became infected no matter how much Lee tried to treat it. The fever and chills made his body ache and the pain from his broken leg soon dulled. His eye always throbbed and he spent most days drifting through nightmares and hallucinations.

Zuko would call out for his mother, who everyone knew had long disappeared. Sometimes it was his uncle or even his sister, asking them for the pain to end. The only time when he called for his father was to forgive him. He would toss and turn in his small room and nothing seemed to help.

The men who would occasionally be lingering around in the halls around his cell would talk about how insane he sounded. They would laugh when he cried out and would yell at him to shut up.

"You think he'll even last long enough to drop off?" one man asked one day.

"I doubt it. Lee said infection set in, that man has too much heart," the other grumbled. "Not like we're not just going to kill him in the end, why keep him alive until we get there?"

"Don't want to stink the ship up with a rotting corpse do we?" the first man joked.

They both laughed before disappearing down the hall. Zuko's mind swam with this conversation and his dreams evolved into dying. Fires and cruel laughter and death filled his mind.

Lee tried his hardest to help him, but there was only so much he could do with the limited amount of supplies he could smuggle in. The infection was difficult to fight and just seemed to get worse. He did talk to Zuko though and that helped. Even dazed by the fever and pain, listening distracted him from his cruel fate and the constant pain. He told him about his younger brother and some of the adventures they got up to.

"There was the time we had stolen from old man Jing. Man was he upset when he found some of his apples gone-"

"Did you know that it is possible to break a pot from just a few inches from the ground? Mom was mad at us when she found the pieces. Let me tell you a cupboard is a terrible hiding spot-"

"So it had this huge hold in the center of the rock and of course Rao had to make it his hiding spot-"

Other stories were of times when he was still a part of the army in the Earth Kingdom. Lee toned down the violence or anything that could make Zuko remember his situation, but they were funny and a lot like the stories his Uncle would tell.

"So there we were surrounded on all sides, 3-1. It looked like we weren't going to make it out when the Lieutenant decided to throw-"

"If I had to eat another of those disgusting soups General Chi decided to make again it'll be too soon. Let me tell you he could not cook-"

"It was an absolute disaster. The men tried to run but it was easy for us to out maneuver them-"

He told stories that he had learned when he was in the colonies, Zuko enjoyed those the most.

"They said that the spirit that lived in the river would grant a wish if you tossed one coin in on the night of the full moon. Of course not many of us believed it, but there was a girl who swore the river spirit granted her wish to cure her younger brother-"

"Long ago there was a spirit of the land who allowed a simple farmer to use his land to grow crops. One day the farm had been attacked. The men had killed the farmer and took it over-"

"The dark water spirit was furious with the dragon and so cursed him to be forced into mortal form. The dragon-"

There was no telling the days. Lee couldn't always come and Zuko was too delirious and more often unconscious to feel the sun. What must have been a few weeks of sailing someone other than Lee came.

"Wakey wakey, princey," a man sarcastically said as he pulled him out of the cell. "Time for you to join us."

The man dragged Zuko above deck, unable to struggle or defend himself. The entire crew was gathered around for this event. Lee was off to the side, his face worried. He couldn't think straight enough to figure out what was going on, only shaking from the freezing cold that permeated through his thin clothes. The moon shined overhead like a beacon in the cloudless night.

"At long last we can accomplish our goal!" the man shouted to the crowd. "The Fire Lord gave us the job of exterminating this rat! And tomorrow we shall be close enough to finally be done with him!"

The men cheered, shouting and throwing insults at the down prince. Their words barely registered, Zuko's eyes glazed over with fever.

"Let the cold have him before tossing him overboard!" A man shouted, rousing cheers all around. "Let the sea have him."

Zuko was pretty sure he blacked out again as more shouts went up. The next thing he remembers was still being above deck while the moon shone down on him. There weren't any guards around as he could hear the loud shouts and cheers from the men below deck. They sounded like they were celebrating.

Taking a deep breath, the icy air burned his lungs and throat. Zuko tried to regulate his breathing, but the pain and cold together made it hard. His head pounded and his vision swam. Neasou churned his empty stomach as coughs wracked his body.

Quiet footsteps approached him on his blind side. Lee appeared kneeling into view. His face twisted into concern and sorrow.

"Lee," Zuko softly groaned looking at the man.

"Shhh," he said placing a soft blanket over him, his infirmary clothes unable to keep him warm. "I'm sorry I didn't get you out sooner."

"'S kay…" Zuko slurred, his tongue feeling like it weighed a ton.

"I'm getting you out of here, don't worry," Lee said, lifting the young teen into his arms.

Zuko didn't have much weight after spending weeks with only the bare minimum to eat. Lee easily carried him to the edge of the ship and placed him in one of the lifeboats. It was small and Zuko laid in the bottom as Lee gently placed him down. The boat already had one blanket in it along with a single bag that Lee used as a pillow for him.

"Rest, Prince Zuko," Lee gently said brushing hair out of his face as Zuko looked up at him. "I pray to the spirits that you'll be safe."

"Tank oo," Zuko murmured, unable to form the words properly.

His gaze moving up to the cloudless sky as Lee gently placed another blanket over him. Lee moved away and carefully lowered the boat down. He had to do it quietly so no one would notice and to not cause Zuko more pain if he was suddenly dropped down.

Zuko felt the water hit the bottom of the boat as the ropes released it into the sea. The boat gently rocked as it drifted slowly away from the small ship. The moon shone down upon him. He soon passed out thinking about how pretty the moon looked.

Fire and darkness still haunted his dreams. It was hard to not dream of anything else. Every time he woke, he laid there gasping for air as the water gently rocked the boat. The rocking helped to calm him down.

He stayed like that for the next few days. In and out of sleep, he stayed curled up under the blanket. The cold slowly seeped into his body, his toes and fingers soon numb.

Each night he looked up at the sky and to the moon. It was like a guiding light and Zuko knew if he didn't find help soon he would die, his strength slowly seeping out of him. All he wanted was to be safe and not in pain.

"Sprits," Zuko muttered gazing up at the moon with glassy eyes. "Please help…"

The rocking of the boat was gentle and lulled him to sleep. Zuko hoped if he was to die it'd be to this. A peaceful death in his sleep, no more flames and no more darkness.

The boat continued to move on its own course, guided by the sea and currents. It got closer and closer to a fleet of ships, all unlike anything from the Fire Nation. Zuko, still out cold would be surprised when he was to wake again, but this time surrounded by help.


A small side note I do have a tumblr if you'd like to yell at me there or just find out more about future updates is under: flying-spark