Q: Tessa, why are you writing all these AUs when you should be rewriting TIY?!1111
A: I don't know. So help me God, I don't know.
A/N: So, I came across a prompt on tumblr for this and it was just so fittingly perfect that I had to. Physically had to. This will probably be a multi-chapter, because of, you know, the brilliance of the prompt. The prologue is much shorter than any of the chapters will be, don't worry. This is for tumblr user flameojamespotter (by the way, your url makes me laugh. All. The. Time.)
Disclaimer: Anything you recognise, I do not own. Except the band name 'The Coven', which I stole from one of my other stories (points if you can guess which).
Prologue: You Want Me (Dead)
"...and next, we have The Coven, Britain's newest singing sensations! Everybody, put your hands together!"
"Stay calm," Lily Evans was telling her bandmates, hopping on the spot. "Stayyy calm, it's going to go fine."
Dorcas Meadowes eyed her. "Mate, stop being all jumpy."
"Me? Jumpy? I am not jumpy. I'm not nervous. I'm perfectly all right," babbled Lily. Dorcas laughed and slung an arm around her shoulders.
"Relax, Lily. What could go wrong?"
Lily stopped bouncing and scowled. "Don't say that-"
But the booming voice of the announcer cut them off. "Oh, it seems there's been a change of plans!"
The girls looked at each other in surprise. "Did you know about this?" Mary Macdonald said in an undertone.
"No!" Lily said.
"Don't freak, Lily, it'll be all right," soothed Marlene McKinnon. "It's probably just a mix up."
Lily nodded weakly, picking up her guitar and and sliding through the strap. "Right, it's probably just a mistake." But then a loud guitar chord echoed through the stadium. A very familiar riff began to play.
"No effing way," Mary said, standing on her toes to see past Dorcas and Lily. "It can't be."
"Please tell me I'm having an auditory hallucination," Dorcas moaned.
"Helloooooo, London! Are you ready for the time of your lives?" a voice shouted, amplified a hundred times. The crowd went positively wild, and even amidst the chaos Lily could discern the shouts of, "It's the Marauders!"
"They are so not hijacking our big night," said Lily through gritted teeth. If it had been anyone else, she might've been a little less irked, but the girls had a long rivalry with the Marauders, and Lily's blood was boiling at the idea of those prats on her stage.
"It seems The Coven won't be able to perform for you tonight!" said the announcer. He sounded far too pleased for Lily's liking. Making a split second decision, she stormed on stage, hands on her hips. The audience fell silent at the sight of her.
"We're able to perform, thanks very much," she said with a glower. Finally catching on, her three bandmates followed her on stage, all wearing equally displeased expressions. "And we're going to do just that, if you don't mind!"
The guitar riff restarted, and Lily resisted the urge to cover her ears and scream into a mic. The audience began to scream and point, and Lily looked up along with them. The four boys were waving from a platform that was slowly moving towards the ground. She clenched her fists. That had been their entrance plan.
"Evening, ladies," said James Potter, winking in their direction. Almost on cue, all four girls rolled their eyes. He hopped off the platform when it was about five feet from the ground - show-off, Lily thought - and sauntered towards them. "What a surprise, seeing you here!"
"Oh, don't pretend, Potter. You knew we were going to be here. Practically the entire country knows," Lily spat, placing a hand on the mic in front of her so her voice wouldn't carry. "You, on the other hand, are supposed to be in... Jamaica, or something!"
"We missed the good ol' English weather, I'll admit it." James spread his arms out apologetically and grinned at her. The audience laughed, making Lily even angrier. She walked towards him and leaned in close, wrapping a hand around his mouthpiece so their voices wouldn't carry. The way he jerked back in surprise made her feel oddly satisfied.
"Why are you really here?" she hissed. "This was supposed to be our night!"
"Look, I honestly know absolutely nothing. We got a call from our agent, saying we had to come play here, so we came. We had no idea it would clash with your show-"
"Bullshit! This is some kind of prank, Potter, and I swear we'll get you back-"
"I'm serious! I wouldn't lie about this, Lily. I know how important tonight is for you." She narrowed her eyes at his apparent sincerity.
"You'd better not be lying-"
Just then, James's bandmate Sirius tapped his shoulder. "Ah, mate, you seeing this?" Lily and James both looked where he was pointing. The announcer was standing on his podium, nodding and talking to-
"That's Sam!" Lily exclaimed. Samuel Harper was the girls' band manager, the one who'd first discovered their talent. Sam had happened to visit Lily's father's pub on a Monday, which was the only night the girls were allowed to play there. Once he'd heard them, he had refused to leave until he had negotiated a contract with them.
"And there's Minnie," Sirius said, nodding. Sure enough, Minerva McGonagall, the boys' manager was right next to Sam, looking as imposing and strict as ever. Lily could never quite understand how a woman like Minerva had ever gotten into the show business.
"Well, well, well, ladies and gentlemen! Do we have a lovely surprise for you!" the announcer said, grinning from ear to ear.
"Before you ask, I have no idea," James said.
"It seems tonight, right here, is the kick-off of a tour the likes of which we've never seen before!"
"Yes, our tour," muttered Lily, but she had a feeling whatever the announcer was going to say would be far, far worse.
"The Marauders and The Coven announce the start of their joint nationwide tour!"
"What?!" chorused both the bands.
"This is the news of the decade!"
"It's certainly news to me!" Lily said furiously.
"They planned it," Sirius groaned. "Minnie and Sam, they've been planning this!"
Lily buried her face in her hands. "This is terrible."
Dorcas came up to her and prodded her in the side. "Lily, where's your game face? The show must go on!"
So despite the fury that swirled through her, Lily plastered on a smile and said, "Surpriiiiise!" into her mic. She had never heard the crowd scream so loud; she thought the sound would echo in her ears forever.
Too bad they were sharing the stage.
