Chapter 7: Asuka Alone


Nine pm.

Another win, another play of the game.

And Asuka still wasn't feeling satisfied with this win, too damn easy. Taking a long gulp from her energy drink and tossing it into the trash, she feels no buzz. Just the feeling of caffeine and taurine bubbling in her stomach without that alert effect she has forgotten how to describe since she had developed a tolerance to it, just like her morning coffee.

"Wow nice hacks you fucking cheater." A high pitched prepubescent voice blurts out among the sea of praises the voice chat was offering each other.

She scoffs and types out a vile retort to destroy the brats self esteem, as she only spoke in ranked matches to avoid the impending waves of desperation from her fellow players.

"I bet you're just a fat, broke bitch boy living in his mom's basement waiting for chicken nuggets."

As if in a reflex she presses on the push to talk button, "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME, YOU LITTTLE BITCH?"

"Holy shit its a girl," The teenager's voice cracks, "H-hey you wanna ER-"

"Here we go…" An older voice murmurs, one of Asuka's fellow ranked team mates, only known as "MassProducedMayhem."

"I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I GRADUATED TOP OF MY CLASS IN LMU. I'VE PILOTED MACHINES OF DEATH AND HAVE THREE CONFIRMED ANGEL KILLS and over twenty confirmed human... kills… ah…" She lifts her finger off the button. As soon as the fire had come, it had left.

"For fucks sake," Asuka thinks to herself. Even putting the fear of God in impudent kids wasn't doing the trick anymore..

The chat feed is silent after that high octave outburst, she presses the button again, "Ah… go fuck yourself." Asuka murmurs before closing the game.

She slides her red cat-eared headphones off her head, hanging it up against the re-plastered wall facing her monstrosity of a computer.

Asuka rolls 180 degrees to face away from the all of a sudden glaring light from her monitor, feeling a headache beginning to grow in her temple instead of the expected caffeine rush that would amp her up for more digital violence.

When she finds her closet mirror staring back at her on the side of the room, she frowns and turns to face her window instead, propping her feet up against her bed. Blue skies, blue water and no smug looking Lillith sunbathing along the sea line. It almost felt sometimes like she was living in a controlled environment, that if she came up close enough, she could rip away wallpaper, or a giant screen. The red ribbon knife in her peripherals pops out against the yellow walls too, almost everything in her room now irritates her.

Suddenly her phone begins to ring, blasting "Archtung by VARG" and she braces herself for what she expects to be a phone call from Hikari, whenever she has an exceptional date with Toji she will go off on either how amazing or how much of an ass he was today. That certainly would be better than one of her dreaded entourage calling her, the clique that hung around claiming to be her friends. She hangs out with them essentially for banter, gossip and drinking. None of them were even remotely interested in the rudimentary subjects of their high school, video games even manga. Perhaps something trending in cinema to make conversation, but nothing of substance, interest or original taste.

If she had to listen to Baby Metal one more fucking time...

So you can imagine her surprise when she finds Rei Ayanami on the caller ID, a picture of one of the only times she had passed out drunk.

After a brief moment of hesitation she answers, "Yo."

"How is it hanging, Soryu?" Rei responds flatly.

Asuka suppresses a cringe, "Could be better."

Pause. "Are you busy?"

She frowns suspiciously, Rei never calls her unless to pass her important information, "Yeah, I was actually in the middle of-" She glances at her overly bright monitor, "stuff."

"Oh..." Rei says softly, "To be forward, I was hoping to ask you for a favor."

There it is, that's the reason. "Wow, typical Ikari's. Only call when they need something."

"I do not recall you calling me for anything else either." Rei shoots back, before Asuka could retort "Besides, I can assure that what I have in mind shall be far more amusing than raging at your machine."

"I was actually having a great time- wait. How did you know I was playing?"

"You are audible from my floor-"

"Doesn't matter. What's the favor?"

"I was hoping you would accompany me while I made a transaction with this boy-"

"I am not third wheeling so you can hook up with a boy-"

"You misunderstand. I am purchasing something from him and he is of an undesirable sort."

Asuka instantly gets the memo, confirming Shinji's story to be true. She sneaks over to the wall adjacent to his to listen to hear if he was doing the same thing. After a while Asuka silently bounces to the opposite side of the room, like a stealthy cheetah. "Why don't you ask Blockhead over here? Or one of the other members of your pothead patrol."

"Shinji is busy with a personal project, and I shall not disclose other members of this "patrol" but they are indisposed as well. I would appreciate your company regardless."

During a bathroom break and Asuka's routine undetected check in, she had found him writing in a trance-like state in his notebook. She paces back and forth for a moment. Rei Ayanami buys weed and gets high as a kite. This, she had to see.

"Fuck it. I'm in." Also a good excuse to get out of her compressing confinement.

Asuka could hear the smile from the other line, "I am glad, I will be downstairs in ten minutes. I shall see you then."

"Hn." She clicks off her phone and pockets it, hopping out of her chair and inspecting herself in the mirror. Grey sweatpants and a green oversized sweater that she had commandeered from her roommate last year when the winters returned with a vengeance.

Undesirable, huh? She opts for tactical and swaps for a black zip up hoodie.

Before sneaking out, Asuka grabs her trusty bear mace and she decides to message Shinji to let him know she's going out. She chuckles to herself, "He's probably gonna freak out, come outside and ask where I'm going."

An audible ping comes from his room and she suppresses a smirk.

"Any second now." she stares at the phone.

Ping.

He sent a thumbs up emoji back.

She sputters violently, before Asuka can tell him off, a sudden voice blurts behind her neck, "Where ya goin?" Misato says curiously, making Asuka jump up high like a startled cat.

Asuka lands in a reflexive combat stance before settling down, "Don't sneak-" She composes herself, "I was gonna go out with Ayanami and uh..."

Misato blinks at her as if that wasn't a comprehensive sentence, "You and Rei?" Asuka nods, "Rei… and you?"

Asuka jazzes her hands dramatically, "I know, total shocker, right?"

The girl's guardian wraps an arm around her shoulder, "Are you kidding me? That's great!" She leads her to the door just barely giving her a chance to put her shoes on. "I'm so glad you two are finally spending time together, I'll give you a ride!"

"Oh- no- that's okay, you don't have to-" Asuka tries to protest, at this rate they're already in the hallway.

"I was gonna go on a beer run anyway, since Shinji is busy writing and forgot to grab us some." She was referring to Pen-Pen, of course.

They enter the elevator, "Yeah, I wonder what he's writing in there…" Her guardian hums in agreement, "Probably his manifesto."

Misato doesn't respond but looks positively giddy. She squeezes Asuka's left arm, "How long has it been since we've done this?"

She raises an eyebrow, "Ride in an elevator?"

"Mhmm!"

Asuka scans Misato up and down, noticing the bags under her eyes, "Have you been drinking already?"

She scoffs and leans on the elevator, "I wish." It's silent aside from the clicking of the elevator's floor and the ambient elevator music. "I just… never feel like I get to see you guys properly, y'know? It's always busy with work and you guys are cooped up all the time…" The girl's guardian mumbles, with a hint of embarrassment.

Asuka nods quietly. As close as they were, when it came to hearing vulnerable moments like this she would turn immediately stiff, like something picks her up by the scruff of the neck and makes her immobile. All Asuka offers is a rigid pat on the back but that's enough to make Misato's smile return, "When things start to settle down, we'll go somewhere nice." '

"When things start to settle down" was Misato's new unintentional mantra. She had said it a few days after they had reunited, at the UN courts and on the day of her promotion.

But regardless, the teen would never forget what truly mattered. Through all the hurt, mistakes and resentment, when Misato walked out of the ocean and stepped up to aid in the rebuilding of society from its foundation, she was still there for them. She fought a war on two fronts and from the Geofront, bought them time.

"I'd like that."

The elevator doors dinged open and the two recompose themselves, leaving the tender moment inside the elevator as they walk out to a sunset.

Rei is already waiting outside when they come out, standing with that ever so slight hunch of hers. She's wearing her sky blue denim jacket, black jeans and a sizable purse. Something had to be off, Rei never wears a purse. She looks in surprise at Misato and then at Asuka, as if to ask 'What give's?'

Asuka mouths something incoherent before Misato approaches her with a skip in her step, "So! What are you two up too?"

They briefly exchanged glances. Rei answers, "We are going to go on a leisurely stroll. To discuss... boys."

Misato turns to look at Asuka who shrugs, she spins her key ring with her index, a stunned look on her face. "Oo-kay then. Well, don't let me keep you girls." She clicks her car keys and her Renault lights up, "Call me if you need anything!" She shouts through the car before driving off and leaving the two antitheses in each other's company..

The two, as is customary, bow to the tree in front of their apartment as if it were a compulsion. The boy that was buried there was relocated almost immediately after Misato and the others had found out what happened, but the adults never spoke about it afterwards. So the teenagers had followed suit.

After some investigation she had found out where he was buried, one of the many new Third Impact memorial sites, although this time, the graves were not empty markers.

Haru was the boy's name. Despite there no being no carvings or letters on or near the pristine tree, it was spelled clearly in the mind's eye of the two. None of the three are ever able to gather their thoughts within that ten mile radius.

The rare occasion where Asuka and Rei were forced to travel as a pair was far and in between it, terse silence or banter that would continually escalate into arguments. Despite their animosity, Asuka couldn't help but note that she was the only one that would talk back to her nowadays, other than Suzuhara. But that was more the likeness of a gorilla thumping his chest as a bluff, as opposed to the half-angel with a Barret under her bed.

Asuka stuffs her hands in her jacket pocket, "Don't think this means I'm gonna be smoking with you."

"I was not expecting you to. The person I am buying it from took an interest in me when we first met, and I am uncertain if he will be alone." Rei walks ahead.

The red head speed walks to catch up to her, "So…do you have an interest in him, Spock?"

The Nephilim blinks, her equivalent of rolling her eyes, "Negative, he does not elicit excitement from me."

Asuka does not pick up on the sarcasm, "Ahhh, gotcha, not enough family resemblance."

Rei raises an eyebrow, "You are very original today."

"Tch." Is all the German can retort with. She walks faster, "Speaking of your Brother Bilo, why didn't you ask him to be your bodyguard?"

The reference flies over Rei's head, "Shinji was busy with a personal project, as I said."

"What's he writing in that diary that's so important anyways?"

Rei catches up to her so Asuka can catch her coy glance, "Why do you wish to know so badly?"

Asuka sputters as she prepares for an excuse but her companion continues, "Shinji spoke to me earlier that certain thoughts weighed heavily on his mind, but it was clear he did not wish to discuss it in detail. So I suggested a creative outlet to redefine the experience."

Asuka scoffs, "So, what? He wants to vent the time he was God of the Fanta-Sea? Get a book deal? Talk about retreaded ground."

The three couldn't keep count of how many government appointed counselors and therapists in creepily colorful rooms asked them to talk about their feelings, to draw it out or even at one time finger paint, all the while scribbling notes. The three and their guardians all agreed to make any public report vague and abstract, to the point where even the true events were redacted to personal opinions and modified reports.

This did not stop private investigators and conspiracy theorists from speculating, most far from the truth or uncomfortably close, either way neither believed.

One in particular makes the most vocal claims behind bars, a presence that had never left them since they were forced to hold up in their own homes, waiting for the end.

"...Yamagishi." Rei simply states, eyes on the road.

The cockroach that just doesn't want to die. Asuka frowns, "Yeah, and that's gonna just solve all his problems."

"It's a start."

"Hnn." Asuka kicks a rock for emphasis, as if to save face.

They both hold to an uncomfortable silence, any other comment will only serve fuel to the fire. At the next block Rei points to a narrow alleyway beside a Korean Barbeque place with a dim light. "He said to meet us there."

"Yeah, not shady at all."

"My point exactly." Walking into the middle of the dimly lit, foggy alley, the girls lean against one of the walls. Rei pulls out her phone and squints at a message, "What does 'OTW' mean?"

Asuka stares at her as if she was challenged. "On the way."

She blinks in understanding, "An Acronym. So he is two minutes "On the way"."

The red head sniffs, "...Great…" She crosses her arms and they both glance away from each other. Times like this where Shinji was not around to play diplomat brought her back to the elevator ride etched in her head. A pang of guilt hits her stomach when she remembers the slap.

"What's this guy look like anyways?"

"He is quite the character. He has this bleach blond top-knot like a samurai. And he dresses like a parrot."

Asuka looks off at a distant object and sniggers mockingly. "Does it bounce up and down when he walks, like he's on a catwalk?"

"I would imagine so, yes."

She points over yonder, trying her best to contain her laughter. "I think that's him." Rei hums in agreement. Surely enough, the dealer appears through the fog with an exaggerated stride, like his pants are sticking to his thighs and his skinny frame is larger than it appears.

"F-fuckin two minutes my ass." Asuka covers her face too late and she lets loose a cackle, Rei's dealer trips and slouches, darting his head side to side in case anyone saw.

He picks up the pace and after seeing Rei, chuckles and rubs his hands. "Heh-heh-heh, wassup, Shawty?" The dealer offers his hand for a greeting, an ever present toothy smirk on his face.

She repeats the handshake from yesterday with fluid ease, "Ayanami will suffice, Denki." Rei states coolly.

Denki raises his hands in mock defeat, "Oo-Okay. All business, I see. I dig it." He turns and looks Asuka up and down as he rubs his hands again, as if he were summoning a genie. "And uh, who's your friend?"

Asuka stares still with her arms crossed, she sizes him up wordlessly. Rei steps in, "This is my friend, Asuka. But she prefers Soryu." The red head looks at her surprisingly but then nods in affirmation.

The dealer covers his mouth with his fist and turns to no one, "Ohhhhh shit. So you're Shin-man's girl?"

The German glares at Rei who is suppressing a smile. Oh, that sneaky bitch. She turns her wrath to Denki, "No. I am not "his girl'" She growls through gritted teeth.

Again with the hand rubbing, "Aheh-heh-heh, so you're single?" Asuka brow lowers into a Kubrick stare as she clenches her jaw, "Okay, okay. Touchy-feely subject, I get it. Can't blame a man for trying right?"

She raises her eyebrow, Rei steps in again to defuse the situation, "Have you brought the cannabis?"

Suddenly Denki freaks out, putting his finger to his lips, "Ey, ey, EY! Keep it down." He whips his head frantically to see if anyone heard before turning back, "Ain't trying to get pinched by no 'ops."

Rei cocks her head, "What is an "op?"

"The cops, girl! The 5-O. They all up in-"

"Oh, who gives a fuck." Asuka exclaims, she cups her hands to her face, "Hey, guys! This guy's selling the MARIJUA'' Denki tries to cover her mouth with his hand and she violently whacks it away with the force of a welterweight.

Denki recoils, shocked and offended. "Twenty five to life, woman. I ain't scared of no prison, I'm hard as fuck, but I gotta watch out too y'know." He moves around them so that their backs face the alley and he is out of sight, shielded by the two slightly taller teenagers. Denki gestures to his EVA 01 merch jacket's kangaroo pouch, which has a bulge in the pocket that makes it look like he is pregnant. "Now how 'bout we get down to business?"

Rei nods, fishing through her purse "An ounce of the Sour Diesel, yes? You did not mention the price-"

Denki fishes through his pouch pocket, pulling out the dense, see-through plastic bag of weed. "Oh, you know I got you that good sativa, girl." He offers it to her but pulls back before she can grab it, "Its, ah, 15,000 yen for the bud, the rollies and the grinder."

The sky blue haired girl frowns, "That is an extortionate offer. I could find someone selling the exact same product for 11,500 yen with ease. You damage your own business with such rates."

"Yeah, dude. You're breaking her balls." Asuka butts in, arms still crossed.

"Indeed, you are breaking my balls, Denki." Rei confirms with a nod.

"Aight, then" Denki challenges, his pride wounded. "W-why don't you go hit them up, you know what I'm sayin'?"

Rei stares innocently for a moment, with a sleight sway. "Because they are not nearly as charming as you."

The blonde dealer suppresses a blush, covering it with his fist and completely unaware of the sarcasm, "Aww, Aya-nahmeee, why you gotta do me like that?" He waits for a retort as they stare at him deadpan. "Well you know me, I'm all about that entrepreneurship. 12,000."

She repeats the handshake again, when Denki looks down at his hand he finds a neatly folded wad of bills. "Agreed."

Denki's jaw drops as he hands her the bag and fishes for the other paraphernalia. "Augh, where have you been?"

She opens her purse, "Three places at once."

"I feel that, I'm all about that grind life too." He drops the contents into her purse. "Yo, call me. If- if you need more, I also sell other things too if you know what I'm sayin'. Like, gear and shit."

Rei gives a small nod, "It was a pleasure doing business with you."

The dealer touches his chest, "Nah, baby-girl. The pleasure was all-"

The girls turn to leave. "We must be on our way."

Asuka stops in her tracks and turns around to inspect Denki's Unit-01 Windbreaker. Merchandise from the upcoming deviated film. "How much for the jacket?"

He pinches his jacket and smirks, "Heh-heh, you like it?" The Japanese boy sways his arms, "4500."

She crosses her arms, "3750."

Denki raises his hands, "Only because it's you." He puts extra effort into stretching out as much as possible while he takes it off, in an attempt to reveal his invisible abs. Asuka tosses him her own bundle of bills which he drops. He shoots up and tosses her the jacket before smiling at Rei. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Rei gives a half nod, "So long."

He stands there awkwardly swaying while he watches them walk away.


Asuka waits until they are out of ear shot before breaking into a fit of laughter. More of a mocking cackle unlike her real laugh, which the two Ikari siblings have only ever heard once. "What. The Fuck. Was that?"

"Haggling." Rei looks at the bundled purple windbreaker folded underneath the German's armpit. "What was that?"

Asuka does not acknowledge the bundle of clothing she has tucked away, "Crap like this is gonna blow up when the movie comes out. Kid's a total rookie."

Rei nods, "I doubt he is an experienced cannabis dealer."

The two stop by a small playground in this small strip of a park with a sandpit. Rei sits on a swing set and Asuka, ready for the show, joins. "How do you even know that clown? And what's tomorrow?"

The Nephilim opens the large bag of Kush and takes in a deep waft, the pungent, obnoxious aroma tickles the German's nose but she refrains from a comment. "He is a mutual friend of one of the members of this… patrol. We are all going on a hike tomorrow. No, not a date." Rei immediately gets to work, "He gave him my phone number after asking and I took the opportunity to pick a particular strain that I wanted." A coy smile rests on her face.

Asuka scoffs, "And they call me a devil." Rei throws a sly glance her way as she grinds up the herbs. "So. How many movies did you need to watch to learn to talk like that?"

The warmth in Rei's eyes dim, "I do not need to watch cinema in order to socialize." She shoots her a look, "And no. From video games."

"Ooooh. Big difference." Asuka retorts, not at all aware of the irony. She peers over to see her effortlessly rolling a joint, "When did this start?"

Rei seals the adhesive, "Yesterday."

"...Huh." Asuka looks away, aimlessly swinging on the child size swing set, "Must've gotten hooked to it pretty bad to learn it that quickly."

"It is quite simple. Elementary even."

The redhead darts her head back to observe her and sniffs, "Looks pretty easy to me."

"That is what I said." Rei responds, as she smooths out the joint.

Asuka was about to get up and leave then and there. "Bet I could do it faster."

The Nephilim offers her the grinder, a pre-rolled filter and paper, "By all means."

The German snatches the paraphernalia out of her hands, "Doesn't mean I'm gonna smoke it."

Rei shrugs, "I do not mind."

"I do not mind." Asuka mimics back in a high pitch voice. As she packs in the sappy herb to the paper she squints and does her best to stop her hands from shaking. She audibly grunts in frustration as she struggles to curl the paper into a cylinder.

Herb starts to shake off from her trembling hands, "You should keep your index fingers behind the-"

"I know how to do it!" Asuka snarls back and leans in even closer.

Rei shrugs again and lights the joint dangling from her lips, "Okay." The Nephilim takes in the peaceful silence of the still park, trying her best to ignore her companions' grunts, the sun has been long set, with a loose fog hanging over the skyscrapers, leaving the air sharp and cool.

"Hah!" Asuka exclaims, jabbing the crumpled, loose joint in front of Rei's face, "How do you like that?"

She takes a very long puff and releases it slowly, "It is adequate."

"Pssh." Asuka fidgets with her creation as her nose wrinkles from the waft coming her way, "How do you even smoke that shit? It feels like you're sniffing a skunk's ass."

Rei inspects the embers of her joint as if the answer lies within, "It is certainly an acquired taste. However I very much enjoy the results, the euphoria is not overpowering and my body feels more relaxed." She taps the ash off from the joint, "Shinji mentioned that it had dulled his phantom pains this morning, from the fight with Sandalphon I believe he said. And it has considerably reduced my muscle soreness from the gym-"

The German was ready to dismiss any justification she had before that keyword. "Wait, wait. What was that about phantom pains? From the volcano?"

"Yes, I have a theory that the THC from cannabis can potentially soothe it. As it has been proven to help with other medical conditions."

Asuka ponders for a moment, "Well, good thing I already developed a tolerance for that phony phantom crap." She lies, "Barely even feel it. Not like I need to resort to drugs to function." Asuka glances at her, "Again."

Rei's body stiffens, "What are you implying?"

"What, you don't notice that as soon as those scientists stopped pushing those pills on you that you found something else to medicate yourself with? What's the matter, is the real world too difficult for you to handle without your happy pills?"

Her companion doesn't respond at first, Rei's nostrils ever so slightly flare, "I find that odd coming from someone with drinking habits such as yourself. And this-" She gestures to the burning joint in her hand, "Is a choice I made consciously after thorough research. I have no intention of letting it interfere with my personal life. Whether you are impressed by it or not is of no concern to me."

The two disengage and look to their sides of the park, not wanting a repeat of last summer.

Asuka plants her feet firmly into the ground of the swing, digging into the sand. "Good for you." Her leg starts to bounce rhythmically as she debates on leaving, but an itch in the back of her mind compels her otherwise.

"Fuck it, pass me your lighter." Rei turns to her in surprise, "Oh just shut up and do it already."

She flicks her lighter on, Asuka leans in and drags in the flame.

Instantly, Asuka begins to hack violently, Rei leans in closely, as if studying her, "Are you alright?"

After five more seconds of coughing she slowly lifts her head, revealing watery eyes, "Y-yeah- why wouldn't I be? It- (cough-cough) It's not even that strong." She wheezes out.

"I am told coughing leads to a stronger effect." Rei reaches into her purse and pulls out a large water bottle, "Take this." Asuka waves a hand of refusal, in an attempt to save face. "I insist."

Asuka trades the joint for the water bottle and with much hesitation lifts the bottle above her head so to avoid touching it with her lips, after only taking a gulp she scans the area to see if anyone caught her moment of weakness. She leans deeper into the swing and holds on for dear life as she tries to formulate a response. "I don't even feel anything."

Rei blinks at her free hand as she curls them, "This... is much more of the effect that I was hoping for. This is a sativa hybrid strain, which has more of a mind high. Indica was quite dull."

"Hooray…" Asuka rasps, her leg bouncing as a wave of anxiety hits her body. Unable to rise from her seat, she suffers in silence.

Her companion notices this, despite the strong front. Over two years of interaction had made slight changes in body language transparent. She sways in the swing as she thinks of a topic to help distract her. "What sort of video games do you play?"

Asuka whips her head, "Huh? Why do you wanna know?"

Rei fiddles with the makeshift joint in her hand, "I hear you play often. But you're always listed as "do not disturb". So I was… curious."

The German digs her foot deeper into the sand, "...Mostly Overwatch. I just beat Wolfenstein so there's nothing good to play right now." She mutters as if telling a secret. The silence is unbearable so Asuka attempts to dull it, "You?"

The curious Nephilim hums, pushing the swing back and forth, "I prefer role playing games that are choice based. I am currently playing the Witcher. The protagonist is…" Rei lets out a sigh. "...Exceptional."

Asuka nods slowly, "Cool."

...

"I was wondering, Soryu-"

"You know we don't have to do this, right?" She grips the chain tighter.

Rei blinks, "I do not understand."

"I get that you wanna play nice to keep the idiot happy, whatever, but when he's not around, who gives a fuck? Drop the mask."

"I have never kept it a secret whenever I find your attitude odious."

"Ooo. Okay, Webster."

The blue haired girl extinguishes her joint and lets out a different sigh, one of great patience. "Despite your attempts to push others away, I still do enjoy your company. Regardless of our past issues." She leans in closer to meet her eyes, which Asuka does her best to avoid. "You saved my life. I have not forgotten that."

Asuka frowns, "Yeah, well. Numbnuts would've had another meltdown if something happened. So don't feel like you owe me." She looks down, her feet are half buried in the sand. "I know that's why you came back. To be with your brother, you didn't really care about anyone else. I get it, he's family and I'm in the way."

She turns to Rei for her affirmation, but all Asuka sees is hurt in the slight curl of her eyebrows. "That's not true." She says softly. They both look away and Rei lets out a shallow breath. "If you were the only one who walked out of that sea, I still would have been there."

The redhead prepares herself for another logical explanation, "Why?"

"Because you are my friend, Asuka."

A sudden wave of paralysis. Asuka's lizard brain kicks in as she fights back the sudden burning in her eyes. Clenching the well of emotion in her abdomen like it was nausea.

She shoots up to her feet, sand flying everywhere as she struggles to maintain her balance. "I'm gonna uh-" She gestures in the opposite direction from where they came.

Rei smiles and sits up, "Let's go home." She leads the way as they walk back at an even, quiet but albeit less tense pace, leaving tracks of sand. "I am not my brother. I have no qualms with being blunt about my feelings and its repercussions. If you would pardon the pun."

"I'm not going to even pretend-" Asuka stumbles on the sidewalk, her voice hoarse "To know what that means."

Her companion playfully nudges her with the purse, "Now who is wearing a mask?"

She retorts with a light shove of her own, not answering the question. "That Denki guy was totally full of it."

"And inconsistent. I would have at least respected his efforts if he had focused his flirtations on only one of us."

The red head snorts, "Oh, no way. That guy's cologne smells worse than this crap. Did you see the way he was walking?" She mimics the exaggerated sway of the Japanese boy, "And that thing he does?" Asuka rubs her hands together, "Heh, heh, heh…"

Rei lets out a giggle and Asuka starts to relax. She curls her face into her best horse face impression. "UNGHH-AYANAMEEEEEE."

The Nephilim makes the most unexpected sound: she snorts and a high pitched laugh squeaks out. She slips on a small puddle, paying it no mind as she keeps walking.

Asuka stares bewildered, did Rei Ayanami just laugh or are the drugs making her hallucinate? "Okay, maybe I am feeling a little buzzed."

Rei catches her breath. "On a scale of one to ten, how do you feel?"

She stares at her hands and blinks at them. The sense of anxiety in her stomach seems to have dissolved into a strange sort of giddiness. Her mind was buzzing a mile a minute, but all movement felt like it was in slow motion when she didn't concentrate on it. Her eyes trail up to the windbreaker tucked under her armpit, having completely forgotten about it earlier.

Asuka smacks her lips, "... a two."

After a moment of hesitation she passes it to Rei. "He'll know it belongs to fuckboy, right? So it's better that you pass it to him. I'd rather he didn't know about- well…"

She gently takes it and folds it in her purse. "I understand."

"Yeah, yeah I know what you're thinking. I just don't have to worry about finding him a Christmas present now, that's all."

Rei flashes her a coy smile, "Do you not mean I won't have to worry?" She stops by a new bus stop bench and looks at the shoddily rolled joint still in her hand. Before Asuka can stammer a retort, she gestures to the joint. "I am only joking. Do you mind if I finish this?"

Asuka shrugs at both her question and joke, "All yours. I'm gonna crash."

She nods and gestures to the bus, "I shall finish it here. Thank you for accompanying me today. That was… fun"

Asuka waves her hand dismissively, "Don't mention it, Ayanami."

"I do not mind if you call me Rei." She glances at the ground, uncharacteristically bashful. "If you want to, I mean."

The German rubs the back of her head, "Uh, sure. I will… keep that in mind." Rei nods and the two stare at each other, unsure what to say. Asuka shoots a finger gun at her, "See you tomorrow."

The Nephilim smiles, "See you tomorrow."

Asuka begins to speed walking back to the complex, realizing that she might have time to make it before Misato's return.


Remembering how she had caught Shinji red handed yesterday, the first thing she does is make a beeline for the bathroom to cover her tracks. The smell of bud and tree sap texture on her fingers would not wash off, so she used Febreze and perfume for good measure.

The smell of the braised pork that Shinji had cooked earlier insists on a detour to the kitchen. Grabbing a generous portion for herself, she also helps herself to the rice and sautéed vegetables he had prepared. The scent of the delicious meal is like a soothing incense to her.

On the way to her room, she stops by Shinji's door and peers through the crack. As she suspected, he is still writing in that trance-like state, frowning with his eyes locked on the paper, occasionally turning to his computer to search up definitions of certain words.

She risks leaning in closer, a certain sense of vigor and passion seemed to emulate from him similar to when he plays the cello. Shinji bites the erase side of his pencil and looks up.

He's hit a wall, she realizes. Which means that he will stand up and begin to pace. Deciding to abort the mission, she sneaks back into her room.

A few glances at her shut off monitor and the box hidden under her bed weigh towards an obvious preference, yet she entertains the debate for no one but herself.

Gently setting her plate down, she pulls out the box and sets aside the dried, bloodied polka dot dress neatly folded inside. Asuka retrieves the journal that hides her most morbid and vulnerable thoughts. She lays the well worn, mustard yellow leather bound book on her desk. With only the delicious meal to keep her company, she gets to work with an immediate topic coming to mind.

Something she never shared to or confide to someone with once.


"Lannister Twins,

Have gone out on supply run. Will be back before sundown. If there is emergency or Numbnuts breaks something, use green flare so I know it's you.

Will fire flare to let you know if I need backup, do not come otherwise.

ALS"

Asuka silently places the letter on her pillow as she sneaks out in the dead of the night, a few hours before the sun would rise. She planned it carefully for two days after their encounter with Yamagishi, waiting for the time of the week where the JSSDF Bandits were the least active and even brought up her traveling supplies during her shift on the roof.

It was the opportune time, she told herself. Ayanami finished her weird looking defense on the rooftop and Shinji finally got out of the kitchen to learn how each booby trap she had set works, if he had a reason to use them she would hear and could beeline back, win-win.

All she needed to do was sneak over to the wholesale grocery store twenty minutes away from the complex and grab only the essentials: bulk frozen meat, vegetable seeds and some fertilizers or whatever the hell you use to garden with. Whatever to get the two of them to stop being so damn mopey.

If she had to eat rice and canned peas for dinner one more fucking night...

Asuka just knew that if she told them that it would have been a big production, it always is with those two. Shinji would refuse to allow her to travel alone and more people would've just slowed her down. Ayanami would have gone on a dissertation on how illogical her plan is anyways.

The truth was they did need the food, yes. But despite her words in the elevator, more than anything she needed to get out of that apartment. There were already too many nights to count where she would thrash herself awake drenched in cold sweat, with two pairs of patronizing eyes staring at her with pity and telling her that she was yelling in her sleep. It was only a matter of time before punching walls and shooting things on the roof wouldn't do the trick and her anger would be taken out on them.

It was better if she just stayed away from them and cleared her head.

Besides, they can hold the fort just fine for a few hours, she reasons as the back door of her home creaks open to be greeted by that unnatural blood red sky. With no doubt that Lillith's corpse was still sunbathing along the coast.

"Quick grocery run. In and out." She mutters to herself as she slips silently through alleyways and shortcuts. Get some grub, go sightseeing and maybe blow some shit up on the way back.

And if she were lucky, finish the job that Shinji was too much of a pussy to do himself. Kill that greasy rat Yamagishi.


The sun begins to peek out past the horizon. Asuka goes out of her way to avoid the side of the grocery story that most likely still held the rotting, flattened bodies of that boy's parents. To go there and give them a proper burial, even to say a few words of respect would be a death wish.

Electricity is still running when she enters the loading bay entrance and thankfully so are the freezers. Despite the place still being well lit, the emptiness adds an eerie haunt to the place. Every sound she makes reverberates deeply into the store, until the idle music muffles it. Much to her surprise, there was considerably less food left from when the three were there just a few days ago. Other survivors or JSSDF must've swept the place.

She hears a scuttling sound at the top floor that halts her search. Asuka lifts her rifle off from thestrap and investigates. If she ran or ignored it she would just have a target on her back. This she needed to deal with head on.

Asuka follows the scuttling sound to what looks like what used to be the breakroom. After a thorough scan confirms no sign of life she turns to leave…

And from behind the door she came from, she finds a young girl aiming a revolver at her head.

The redhead stops herself from reflexively squeezing the trigger and slowly lowers her gun. "Easy…"

The girl seems unfazed, she mustn't be older than seven. "You got me." Asuka sets her rifle on the floor.

She pulls back the hammer and Asuka's breath gets caught in her chest. Was this how she was gonna die, after everything? Fighting Angels at the end of the world just to get shot in a fucking grocery store? It made her sick to her stomach, but all she could think about was-"Bang!"

Asuka flinches and shields herself, looking up to see the girl giggling. "'Gotcha!" She breathes a sigh of relief and grabs her rifle, ready to smack the child with it. "Mommy said to only shoot bad people. But you look nice."

She stops in her tracks and stammers, unable to remember the berating she was about to give. "I am not nice." She sneers instead. "Where the hell are your parents?"

The girl lowers her pistol, "They went to go get gas, they'll be back soon."

Asuka nods, "Good for you."

She goes to leave but is stopped by a small hand pointing at her chest. "Name's Emiyo Sato. Nice to meetcha!" Emiyo shoots her a gap toothed smile.

The German offers a limp handshake in order to get rid of her. "Asuka. Asuka Langley Soryu." She refrains from the 'charmed, huh?' part.

"Wanna be my friend, Asooka?" Emiyo asks with the utmost charm.

"Not really."

The girl looks down, "Oh."

Asuka straps the rifle back on her back, "Well I'm going to the freezer for some meat. Don't mind me."

Emiyo takes a hesitant step forward, "M-my mom said that I'm not allowed to leave here."

The redhead looks over her shoulder and shrugs. "Do whatever you want."

She steps out of the breakroom and heads down below. After a tentative glance back and forth, Emiyo runs after her.


"You're gonna climb that?" Emiyo asks with amazement as she bites back a shiver, gawking high above.

"Don't exactly have a choice." Asuka mutters as the two peer up to the at least twelve feet tall shelves of the frozen meat section. Most of the contents were stripped except the hard to reach spots, and there lies her bounty. Two massive frozen hams. She passes her rifle to the seven year old, "Don't break it."

The girl stares at the rifle like it was an artifact, "Okay…" She peers up at Asuka who has already begun the shaky climb. "Be careful!"

"Tch." Asuka scoffs as she effortlessly climbs the shelf, careful not to slip on the frosty metal. At the top of the summit was her prize, Asuka's mouth waters at the thought of what Shinji could cook with that. She pushes the two hams off the shelf, "Look out below!"

The hams land with a satisfying thud, "Ha! See? Told you, it was easy as- SHIT-" She slips on the metal and falls the whole twelve feet. The ex-EVA pilot tries to land gracefully on her feet like a feline, but lands like a human instead and rolls her ankle.

"Ahh!" Asuka nurses her foot and winces, "Fucking cocksucker!"

"Fucking cocksucker!" Emiyo mimics eagerly, she running circles around her, arms out like she is in an aeroplane, the rifle waving in her hand.

"Wait! No, don't say that- ah... screw this." Asuka mutters as she slings the two massive hams on her back and snatches the rifle from Emiyo mid-run.

The girl stops running after she notices the way that Asuka tries to hide her limp. "Are you okay?"

"Never been better." Asuka groans as she attempts to hobble out, only a twenty minute walk she said, in and out, she said. "I'm outta here. Good luck finding your mom and dad.

Emiyo jogs up to her, "You should wait for mommy. She's a nurse."

"Good for her." She mutters and keeps dredging to the back door.

She's stopped by a small pair of hands, "Stay!" Asuka whips her head to scowl at the pouting child, "Please?"

Asuka can only hold eye contact with the girl's large, shiny eyes for a few seconds before looking away with discomfort. It reminded her of the glaring sun light, or for a brief second…

She shakes her head and makes a long, drawn out sigh before passing her one of the hams.

"Fine." Asuka gestures to the staircase leading to the roof. "Help me up there. We'll see if we can find them."

"If they're even alive that is…" She morbidly thought to herself.


The German peers through the scope for any sign of movement. It's been two hours since she arrived at the store and soon enough the JSSDF in their jeeps will begin their hunt. The first thing she had done was lock down the entrance after a brief survey on the roof before returning.

"Asuka?"

Her eye twitches, as she predicted, the first jeep is spotted, they seem to be trying to flush someone out of a nearby gas station with, funnily enough, gas. She can practically feel Emiyo breathing down her neck.

"Asoooka?"

"What!?"

Emiyo points to Asuka's garment. "Why are you wearing a triangle scarf?"

"It's not a scarf..." She mutters. "...It's a poncho."

The girl points out Lilith's gargantuan corpse, her nose poking out among the buildings. "Why's there a giant lady in the ocean?"

Asuka sighs, "Evil scientists tried to start the apocalypse."

"Oh…" Emiyo sways her arms, scanning the environment. Asuka looks back to the gas station. A man and a woman bolt out of the store, holding each other's hands, the woman blonde and the man bald. The JSSDF bandits run into their jeeps and begin pursuit. A part of her prayed they weren't-

"Why's the sky red?"

Twitch. She ignores her and follows the chase, the two make a beeline for a nearby skyscraper. Stupid move. Now they were unarmed and trapped. The bandits swarm inside.

"Asuka?"

"Not now." She hisses. Asuka slowly turns to the girl. "Your parents… is your mom blonde, your dad bald?"

Emiyo shakes her head. "Nuh-uh. My mommas got brown hair and my daddy has long black hair." She points to her long brown hair.

Asuka nods, "Good…" Wait, long black hair? "Your dad, is he in the army?" She nods her head proudly.

No fucking way. "Is his hair… greasy?"

The girl sticks her tongue out in disgust, "No… he always ties it up. Like me!" She points to her ponytail.

She lets out a sigh of relief, if she were babysitting Yamagishi's brat... the disgusting thought of using her for ransom briefly passes through her mind. Asuka's scope travels to the top of the roof where the couple now glances over the ledge. Before they can work the courage to jump, the bandits kick open the door. Five of them strut out, one of them being a woman with long black hair, she notes. No guys with their hair long except none other than the greasy fucker himself: Yamagishi.

Asuka switches to semi-automatic on her rifle, she has a clear shot. Before she can squeeze the trigger she suddenly remembers the presence of the annoying girl beside her. Her position would instantly be given away if she took the shot and she would be swarmed. Even with her limp, she could probably make it back to their fort no problem. But if she had to make a run for it, Asuka would have to leave Emiyo behind. Not to mention even if they did make it, she would have to explain to the Ikari's why they have another mouth to feed. Although Shinji being the henpecked housewife he is would probably be ecstatic and terrified at the same time.

She switches the safety back on. "It's your lucky day, fuck-face."

"Fuck-face!" Emiyo repeats cheerfully.

"Will you shut up!?" She snarls, making the child flinch. "I'm trying to concentrate."

"On what?" Asuka groans as the girl wiggles under her arms to try and peer at the scope. "I wanna see!"

A bang echoes through the city, followed by a blood curdling shriek. "Trust me. No you don't."

The girl wiggles out, as if in understanding, after a moment she whispers. "...Bad people?"

Asuka peers through the scope, the man is now crumpled on the ground. The blonde woman is being tossed back and forth to the circle of JSSDF renegades, the black haired woman spits on her as she passes by. Yamagishi chuckles to himself as he lights a cigarette. He slowly turns his head and Asuka gasps.

He's looking right at her.

Yamagishi flashes his award winning smile and waves to her through the scope.

"...Yeah. Bad people."

The circle begins to close tighter and tighter as all she can see is the woman's limbs flailing to the sky, her back now on the ground. The group of men surrounding her look almost like carrion birds circling wounded prey. Almost like…

Asuka clenches her throat as a sudden surge of bile attempts to leave her body, fighting it back to save face in front of the girl. She lowers the gun and attempts to stand, nearly falling on her bad ankle. Emiyo grabs her for support as she leads Asuka back to the staircase.

Another sickening thought passes through the former EVA pilot. If she were in that woman's shoes, would she have hesitated to jump too?


When they got inside, the sense of fear and tension instantly evaporated from the girl, already asking Asuka every question that came to her head, like she was a search engine. She had earlier locked the anti-theft doors at the front entrance. It might not be enough to stop a jeep, but at least they won't be able to waltz in. The only other way in was the back door she first came in from. She had managed to barricade the staff entrance, leaving only one chokehold point for them to get through. All there was left to do was wait for the opportune moment.

After attempting to endure this for an hour, she announces that she will take a nap and for the child to watch the security screen.

Asuka had managed to get a full hour of uninterrupted sleep, following another hour of her attempting to keep her eyes squeezed shut, as if it would stop the constant wave of disturbing thoughts from entering her brain. Once she was able to keep them at bay. Piloting the EVA, Kaji and wearing the skin of a normal girl had kept her distracted plenty. But even since the Angel of Light had shattered the mirror to her psyche…well, let's just say there was nothing left to break. Just a stampede of feet crunching on broken glass.

Or so she thought.

She opens her eyes and basks in the blessed silence, before a sense of dread hits her stomach.

It's too quiet.

"...Kid?" She calls out to no one. "Kid!"

Asuka sits up as quickly as her rolled ankle permits. "Quit fucking around, brat. This isn't funny!"

Silence.

"...Emiyo?"

Her voice echoes throughout the store with no response. She grabs her rifle and hastily limps to the break room to find no one there.

"Emiyo!" Asuka screams out loudly. She prepares to head outside-

"I'm up here." A muffled voice calls back, on the roof.

Asuka clenches her chest tightly and hyperventilates. Relief washes over her before being overshadowed by unyielding rage.

"That little shit." She hisses.

Taking her time to hobble up the staircase and rehearse her berating to the kid, she slams open the door to find her standing in the middle of the roof. "What the hell did I tell you about being up here!?"

Emiyo slowly turns around with a pair of massive binoculars in her little hands. She looks down in shame. The setting sun hangs on her back, silhouetting the crucified MPE's in the background.

"I was just looking for 'em." She mutters to her feet as Asuka marches to her and snatches the binoculars, breathing heavily through her nostrils.

Asuka tugs at the girl's sleeve as she walks back, a throb in her temple. "Yeah, well if they haven't come back by now they're probably dead." She instantly regrets that slip.

Emiyo stops walking, she starts to hiccup. "What?"

The redhead tries to come up with a way to calm her down while avoiding eye contact, "Or- or they could have just left." Oh, fuck, that was worse. Nice job, Asuka.

"But why?" The girl asks, her hiccups and whimpering begin to annoy Asuka for some strange reason.

"Well probably because you were slowing them down!"

"You're lying! They wouldn't!"

"I hate to break it to you kid, but that's just the way the real world works. The sooner you get that, the sooner-"

The girl emits a high pitch whine, like a steaming tea kettle. Emiyo breaks into a wail, tears and snot run down her face. "Are you serious? Seriously? Do you know how dumb you look right now?" The girl gasps briefly before wiping her face with her sleeve.

"I hate you! Your poncho looks fucking stupid!"

"Yeah, well you're a pain in the ass!" Asuka snaps back, "You know what, do whatever you want. Scream your head off for all I care." She gestures wildly, "Bring in the whole party! You'd be doing me a solid."

The girl doesn't respond, still wailing. With a scoff Asuka turns to grip the door handle and stops when Emiyo's words send a chill down her spine.

"I want my momma... " The child whimpers.

Her hand trembles around the doorknob, she slowly turns to see the crying little girl alone in the middle of the roof. When Asuka glances at Emiyo, she sees a reflection. She knows she should feel sad, to want to hug and whisper soothing words, but all she feels is anger.

"Stop that."

Emiyo only sobs louder in response, her voice going hoarse but persistent.

"Stop. Crying." She says through burning eyes.

This only seems to upset her more. Asuka's bottom lip quivers as she marches to the child and grips her shoulders tightly, "Stop it!" She shakes her roughly for emphasis. "Stop."

The girl flinches and freezes, still hiccupping. Emiyo avoids her eyes.

She can't lose another one. She can't see another kid-

"Fuck this." Asuka whispers to herself as she shoots up and limps towards the door. "Fuck this." She shoves it open.

For once Emiyo doesn't mimic her, she slowly follows her inside.


"I'll kill you."

Asuka lays on the floor, with Emiyo on the other side of the surveillance room, laying on two of the chairs. All they could do was wait for them to come, or in the hopes they would pass by.

Emiyo woke up to the sound of quiet mutters.

"I'll kill you."

She peeks her eyes to find the source of the sound, leading across the room.

"-Kill you, I'll kill you."

Asuka lays on her back, her arm stretched to the light fixture as she hisses and snarls, her other hand clenching her eye. The other eye is wide open but miles away in a nightmare. "I'll kill you, I'll kill you, I'll kill you, I'll kill you, I'll kill you…"

Emiyo slowly lowers her head back down, silently praying that her protector won't wake up as she hugs her knees.


Sunlight slightly begins to crack through the blinds, small rays slivers in between dense red clouds. Breakfast for the day was microwaved slices of thawing ham.

The girl was uncharacteristically silent. Asuka couldn't believe she was saying this, but she would give anything to hear one of her random, silly questions right now. It had become just like back home. Asuka had thought she could leave her problems there, but maybe she was...

Anticipation gnaws at her stomach, if they left through the front it would be suicide. Their best bet was to sneak out the back while the JSSDF were preoccupied. Or they change their tactics and swarm the place.

"I have a good memory. But even then all I see are faces…" He said to her, the realization had slowly dawned on her that it was no coincidence they had lured the couple to that building. It was a message, Asuka thought with a shudder. "Think you got me all figured out, huh? Well if you knew me as well as you think, you woulda killed me when you had the chance."

Emiyo stares at Asuka quietly muttering to herself, as she disassembles and cleans her gun. One of the mechanisms snaps into place.

"I killed angels with my bare hands, you peasant." Snap. "You're just a big pussy, with your little entourage. You're a bigger pussy than Numbnuts, which is saying something."

The girl watches in silence, with the occasional sniffle being the only evidence she was still there. Asuka keeps her focus on the gun, not even so much as a glance to the small child since they climbed down the stairs yesterday.

Eventually, Emiyo works up the courage to ask her a question. "What are we gonna do?"

Asuka keeps working on the rifle. "Well, first chance I get, I'm slipping out of here and heading back home."

"...What if bad men come?"

The red head reaches for her backpack and produces a flare gun and pellets, all the while avoiding eye contact with the girl. "Call for backup. Purple for non-emergencies. Green for the big guns." Not something she wanted to resort to.

Emiyo clutches her knees tightly, "What do I do?"

Get lost, a vile voice in the back of Asuka's mind hisses, but she shakes her head. "...If you get tired of waiting, you can come back with me. Crash at my place for a few days. Figure out what to do."

"I... don't…" She stares at Asuka, who is ignoring her. "...Okay."

Asuka nods to nobody. The silence fills the air again in the massive store.

Emiyo lets out a sniffle that she tries to muffle with her hands. "You know it's... okay to cry. " Asuka mutters. "Sometimes."

The girl looks up to see if Asuka was acknowledging her, but she is still talking to her as if through an earpiece. "...You're a good kid."

Emiyo slowly walks toward her, sniffling. Asuka scoots her body away as if to avoid challenging an apex predator.

She leans in face-to-face and shakes her arm.

Asuka slowly meets the girl's teary gaze. Emiyo had morphed into a smaller version of herself, with pigtails and a red dress.

"Why won't you look at me?"

She shudders, unable to respond or look away. Emiyo buries her head in Asuka's lap and sobs.

The redhead sits stiff, paralyzed, her arms wide as if moving would set off a bomb. She pats the kid on the back and lets her cry there as the time passes.

She tries to find something to say to comfort her.

"We… have a penguin at home."

Emiyo lifts her head in confusion. "A… p-penguin?"

"Yeah. His name is Pen-Pen. He likes to drink beer."

She rubs her eyes, "Really?"

Asuka nods, "We have a chef too. Can make you whatever you want."

Emiyo blinks up at her, "Even pancakes?"

"Especially pancakes. He can make French toast too. Ever had French toast?" The girl shakes her head. Asuka sighs at the thought.

Suddenly the sound of cars passing by. At least two. "Well he makes a mean French toast. He puts strawberry syrup on it with whip cream."

The girl's stomach grumbles, "That sounds tasty."

A crash as one of the jeeps ram through the doors. Asuka pats her on the back one last time. "You'll love it." She whispers as she slowly stands up to grab her rifle. A sudden wave of resolve washed through her that made the ache in her ankle feel non-existent as she strode evenly to the surveillance screen. As she suspected, they were arriving at the front entrance, four of them with Greasy taking the lead.

Footsteps begin to echo through the store along with indistinct chatter. Talking about securing the exits she assumed, as well as to hurry hurry along. One phrase in particular ran clearly throughout the store from Yamagishi.

"She's mine."

Asuka's ears begin to beat loudly. She runs to grab Emiyo's hand.

"Are you alright, Asuka?" Yamagishi calls out loudly in the store, evidently not aware of her location. "You didn't wave back."

She pushes her index finger to her lips and Emiyo nods slowly.

"I know what you're thinking. I'm not mad at you for shooting me… Honest. We were strangers and we were antagonizing you. It was not the right approach and I sincerely apologize for my rudeness. Come down and we can talk about things like adults."

The sound of footsteps begins to scatter. Asuka slowly reaches for the remote PA speaker and slides it in her pocket. The monitor shows Yamigishi strolling through the isles, peeking around the corners, armed with a pistol and rope. The girls slowly move to the opposite side of the building.

"Your friends came by and did that too, talked to us I mean. Ikari and blue haired girl. They wanted me to tell you that they were concerned. How you were acting crazy. I... can't imagine what you poor kids have been through. They're doing alright. Ikari he-." Yamagishi chuckles earnestly, "He insisted that I come down myself and make sure you were okay. Now, I'm a very busy man. But for you, I can make time." A moment of doubt flickers through her.

"Hope it was because you were busy writing your obituary, bitch." Asuka's voice booms out from the speakers. Yamagishi points to the second floor, to the security office. Just as Asuka planned. The girls are already on the opposite side and move for the loading bay.

He lets out a forced laugh, he's starting to lose his temper. "You're very brave, Asuka. I'll give you that. God, the confidence piloting an Evangelion must give you. Well, I hate to break it to you, but you're in the real world now. There's dangerous people out there that are stronger than you. Much stronger. But I can protect you."

One of the bandits runs to Yamagishi, who is in full uniform as opposed to the former in his ragged jacket. He states sharply into his ear. "I just got a call from Atami, they're-"

"Wait." He hisses sharply. The two girls stop near the back exit to see a guard leaning on a jeep. They backtrack to one of the storage rooms. They hide in a blind spot behind the shelf, Asuka holds Emiyo protectively.

The bandit grabs him by the shoulder again, "Wait, goddamn it!" Yamagishi brushes him off roughly, he fumes. "Asuka. Honey? I can't promise you your safety if you don't let me help you. Understand? It's now or never."

The bandit grabs his shoulder again, "We don't have time for this!"

Yamagishi shoves him to the floor and fires a shot into the ceiling. "Asuka! I'm done playing around. Come here now, and I promise to tell my boys not to break your friends in!" He roars, panting, waiting for another witty retort.

He fires two more gunshots.

"Asuka!"

Emiyo shakes in her arms. "Oh, fuck this guy." Asuka mutters to herself. She moves to a nearby window and sticks her flare gun through, aiming it at the sky. "Numbnuts, you better bring me the panzer-"

Suddenly, an explosion echoes in the distance, drawing everyone's attention. Another one, booms out, much closer and reverberates, making the store lights flicker. Neither one of them sound like they were near home, Asuka notes.

"What the hell is going on!"

"I was trying to tell you!" The bandit yells back.

A third JSSDF runs in, "Sir, that came from the munitions depot. They're saying someone torched it!"

"For fucks sake!" Yamagishi roars. He stomps away heavily. "This isn't over!"

"Far from it, asshole…" Asuka thinks to herself, they listen to the sound of the jeeps driving off.

After a few minutes, Emiyo wiggles out of her hold. She grabs her wrist before she can leave.

"Is it a trick?" She asks.

Asuka peers out the window, "Maybe…you still have the pistol?" Emiyo nods, "Good. Stay here." She moves towards the loading dock, the adrenaline wears off, bringing back the aching feeling in her ankle with every step. She shuts the door.


Having swept the deserted loading bay with her rifle, she pushes in to scout either side of the street in case a jeep stayed behind. What she finds instead is an man in civillian clothing, a rifle strapped to his back. He raises his hands just as she raises her rifle. "Wait, don't shoot!"

"Give me a good reason not to." She spits back, her automatic rifle set to burst in case she misses.

"I-I have a daughter. Please, I need to find her."

Asuka inspects him. Tied back ponytail. "What's her name?"

"Emiyo. She's seven. Long brown hair. Have you seen-"

"Okay, okay, I get it- shut up." She looks to the pillar of smoke a few kilometers' away, her rifle still aiming at him. "Was that you?"

The man nods slowly, "The second one, yeah."

After a moment of deliberation, she gestures to the loading bay with her rifle. "Your daughters in there."

Realization dawns on the man's face, then with a look of gratitude. "You been protecting her-"

A loud crash rings out inside the building, the two both look at each other before sprinting back inside the store. Asuka hops madly, ignoring her foot screaming in protest.

They sweep past the corner, both rifles at the ready, the door is wide open.

"No. No-no-no-no-" Asuka thinks frantically, she left after waiting for only a few minutes. A few minutes, how could she be so stupid-

"Mommy!" Emiyo's voice shrieks out from around the room. The two walk inside to see that the girl has tackled a taller woman to the ground and they breathe a sigh of relief. The man squats down to join the hug, earning a squeal from his daughter as the older woman looks up.

"Kosei, you idiot." The woman murmurs, "I thought I told you to wait in the car."

"Are you kidding?" Kosei holds his family tightly, "There's no way I'm missing this."

The three sit there together for a long time while Asuka watches from the door frame, a strange mix of annoyance and longing sitting in her stomach.

The mother looks up to Asuka and then to Kosei, "Who is this?"

Before Kosei can speak, Emiyo pipes up, "That's Asuka! She babysat me while you were getting gas."

"What? I did not-" Asuka clears her throat as she notices all three pairs of eyes locking on her. "I was just in the area. That's all."

"Asuka." The mother speaks softly, extending her hand. "I can't thank you enough." Asuka slowly hobbles over to her and grasps her hand, the mother looks down to her swollen ankle. "Perhaps we should head back and get that looked at."


They are hiding inside one of the abandoned Angel shelters, their car parked out of sight and with a large network of escape routes set inside the shelter, it was an ideal hiding spot and a temporary home for the family.

Emiyo's mother, Hanako as she introduces herself, wraps a damp cloth around the German's foot. Asuka's nose wrinkles at the strong stench of vinegar but doesn't struggle against her gentle hold. "This should reduce your swelling." She gently sets it on a box. "In a week you should be fine, but I don't want to see you walking around anywhere until then."

Asuka nods, "You got it, doc." She lies. The redhead peers over to see Kosei staring at her suspiciously, Emiyo is sound asleep in his arms.

She stares back, frowning.

"Well, technically I'm a nurse-"

"Hey, soldier-boy. Why don't you take a picture? It'll last longer." She attempts to march over to stare him down, but Hanako shoves her back in place.

He raises one hand apologetically. "I'm sorry. I just… remember you."

"Yeah, well, get in line. What, you want payback for me flattening your friends too? I was too busy fighting for my fucking life. As far as I'm concerned, we're even after you burnt my crew alive with flamethrowers."

Hanako looks at Kosei with a shocked expression, he looks at her then at Asuka with gritted teeth, "They weren't my friends. And none of us had a choice to begin with. We were told that NERV was the enemy, If I refused I would have-" He looks at the sleeping Emiyo. "You're right. The JSSDF did horrible, unspeakable things and they still are as we speak. They were let loose. As soon as I knew my what superiors intentions were after we woke up, I left to find my girls. But I never killed anyone in that base. I was shot in the head before I had the chance."

Asuka leans in, "What did you say?"

Kosei points to his temple, "Right here. Last thing I remember before I dropped to the ground was a blue haired girl looking at me. I had a strange dream then all of a sudden I woke up in that damned ocean."

Rei? It had to be at least one of them, but that didn't make any sense…

"I didn't want to kill anyone but... I would have. I had my orders. I swear on my daughter's life-" He gets up, cradling his daughter as he walks up to Asuka and squats down to her eye level.

"It was nothing personal."

Unbeknownst to her, those words had an entirely different meaning to someone else, so instead she scoffs. "Yeah you're just an innocent family man, right? Well where the hell were you when that kid was alone? Who just abandons their family like that?" She says to him and partially, to herself.

Kosei frowns. "It was just supposed to be a quick gas run, but when we came back we saw the patrols. We knew we needed a distraction before we could make a break for it. If you weren't there to look after her, who knows what would've happened."

Not wanting to mention that the only reason Yamagishi was even circling the area was for her, she waves a dismissive hand. "Just be glad that someone else had the same idea, who the hell was that anyways?"

Hanako speaks up, "We've heard talk on the radio of another faction in Atami, how they're trying to recruit people fresh from the beach and re-establish the government." Emiyo slowly blinks to consciousness, not able to follow the conversation.

"Tch. Same old song and dance. Bet they're no better."

"At least they're not running people over in jeeps as soon as they leave the ocean. The things we've seen…" Hanako shudders. "I don't suppose you still have that EVA lying around?"

Asuka shakes her head. "It's been torn to shreds. Even then…" Images flash through her head, the countless barrages of pain and violation from Angels and the MPEs. Her reward was being eaten alive and then subjected to the world's largest drug trip.

"This is different from squishing people inside of an EVA..." Numbut's annoying voice mutters in her head. She batted VTOLs together like they were toys, she stomped on living human beings that had families of their own and skidded on the pasty jam under her feet.

"Even if there was another EVA to pilot. Never again."

The two adults looked at her with a sense of understanding, but not sure what to say…

"You're an EVA pilot!?" Emiyo exclaims as she wiggles out her fathers grip and meets Asuka face to face.

Asuka shrugs. "I was. Not anymore-"

"Woah… which one?"

She can't help the smirk forming on her face, "The red one."

Emiyo jumps up and down excitedly, "That's so fucking cool!" Hanako glares daggers at Asuka, who rubs the back of her head nervously. "Unit Two was my favorite superhero!"

Asuka had received more empty praise than she could ever count from obligatory or predatory adults, but this was the first time a child ever called her a hero. It felt...good.

"You should come with us! No ones gonna mess with an Eva Pilot!"

Hanako chuckles and ruffles Emiyo's hair. "We were planning to travel north, to Kanto. She's right, you should join us. We can protect you."

A pit drops in Asuka's stomach as she looks between the mother and the child's welcoming eyes. "I wish I could, but I got…" Family. "...People I gotta look after. One of them has special needs."

Emiyo pouts at her, "So… this is goodbye?"

She sighs, "I guess so, kid. I'm… sorry you didn't get to try the French-"

The girl clings to her abdomen, holding her tightly. She doesn't reciprocate but doesn't stop her. Asuka gives her tradition, awkward pat on the back before looking up to Kosei in hopes of changing the subject. She points to one of the hams leaning on the wall. "Take one 'em. For the road."

"Oh, no. We couldn't-"

"Just shut up and take one before I change my mind."

He smiles and nods, "Allright. Thank you."

"Bah." She waves her hand dismissively.

Hanako gently scoops up Emiyo to give her and Kosei a moment to talk. He leans closely. "Listen. Is there any way we can repay you for what you did?"

Asuka thinks briefly, she looks over to see the pile of leftover demolitions from Kosei's "Distraction." The mocking images of the crucified MPEs fly into her head. "Actually. There is one thing you can do for me."


She had planned it out perfectly, essentially lassoing the explosives to one of the Mass Produced, crucified EVAs that was beginning to lean against one of the sky scrapers. It took a few tries, but there were now enough explosives tied around its neck to knock down the building beside it.

Asuka had relocated to a safer and much more undetectable rooftop with a splendid view of her work. It was a win-win, JSSDF and Greaseball would investigate the explosion while she and the now departed family slip away.

Shinji and Ayanami praise her work, Shinji grasps her shoulders, which she welcomes. "Great idea, Asuka! They'll have no clue what hit em'."

Asuka puts her hands on her hips proudly, "Yeah, well I am pretty damn smart."

Ayanami nods excitedly, "Indeed, blow it to kingdom come, Asuka!"

She chuckles to herself, "If you insist." Asuka strides over to the detonation mechanism, positioned right by the window for the optimal view. She brushes the switch with her hand and sighs.

"Drei... zwei. Eins!"

Click.

The EVA lights up and the shockwave takes a minute to reach her, nearly knocking Asuka off her feet. The white monstrosity topples onto the building, its limbs flying off into the ocean as the skyscraper comes tumbling down.

Asuka whoops loudly, "Bitching!" She wipes her hands together and reaches for Shinji's shoulder, "Pretty cool, huh, Numbnuts?" She grabs nothing but air. "Sh- Shinji?"

She turns to find the room suddenly empty. A fierce wind howls through the empty roof and rattles away her brief moment of joy.

"...Oh."

Her eyes begin to burn as the sudden overwhelming emptiness sinks in to her. The only thing in her company is the detonation mechanism and the thawing ham. A sudden anger flares in her and she stomps at the mechanism until it cracks and flattens. But it's not enough for her so she keeps stomping.

Eventually her foot slips and sends a wave of agony, causing her to slump down and nurse it. She pants heavily, fighting back the aching need to sob.

This is what I wanted, right?

A single droplet of water leaks down her scarred eye and she catches it, staring at it with loathing.

"Disgusting."


Twenty minutes later, Asuka has finished her pathetic hobble down from her observatory, her rifle and ham slung on her back. She left all thoughts on what had happened up on that roof. More indistinct chatter fills the bottom of the building.

"I really am losing it…" She thinks to herself, "I'm just a burden to them, maybe it's better if I don't come back."

The voices are masculine and backdropped by the sound of what appears to be two hoses spraying on a wall.

"All I'm saying is that he needs to get his priorities straight."

"Don't let Yamagishi catch you saying that." The second voice warns.

Asuka freezes in her tracks. Vindication washes over her as she grabs her rifle and switches off the safety.

"Think about it, we're in the middle of a freaking war and he's so busy focusing on getting a trophy instead of winning it. You get trophies after a war, not during. I get there's no more rules and he wants some action but, Jesus Christ. A kid?"

"You're one to talk. Our job is to do what he says and we get a slice afterwards. Besides, they're EVA pilots. High status. Who knows what secrets they know."

Asuka peers around the corner, the two JSSDF men are relieving themselves on a concrete wall.

"For Christ's sake. They're fourteen… just kids. How hard is it to catch some goddamn kids? Might as well just kill them and get this twisted game over with."

"They're crafty, I'll give 'em that. Besides, he says he wants em' "unscathed and unspoiled". The second bandit looks at the first, making him glance away uncomfortably. "If he really wanted secrets, he'd go and find Gendo Ikari. That's all talk."

"Fuckin' knew it." Asuka thinks to herself, "Maybe I can sneak by…"

"That's all he is, is what I'm sayin'." The first man shakes, "Maybe it's time for someone more focused to run things."

The second man laughs loudly, shaking too. "Tell you what, soon as you say that to his face, I'll be the first one on your side."

Asuka stumbles and steps on a leaf. Crunch.

The two bandits whip around to find a redhead girl aiming her rifle right at them. "It's her…" The first one whispers.

"Shh!" The second retorts sharply, he raises his hands, "Easy there, girl…" He says, as if calming a wild animal. "Easy…"

The first reaches for his side arm and Asuka squeezes the trigger, spraying blood all over the concrete walls as the two bandits drop dead instantly.

She stares at the scene and refrains herself from vomiting. "Fuck...Fuck!" Asuka hisses as she books into a hasty hobble.


Home stretch. Nearly an hour later, after slowly limping and sneaking back to her home, the sun begins to set, roughly six PM. She left only yesterday at dawn but it felt like weeks since she had seen the complex.

Asuka decides to risk bowing to the tree before climbing into the complex. When she presses the elevator button she gets no response from it.

She frowns, "Gone for one fuckin' weekend…" Asuka begins the slow haul up the stairs, making her entrance as dramatic as possible.

"And it all goes to shit…" She pants, "Seriously guys… fuck you."

At the halfway point, footsteps start to clamber down the stairs loudly, granting a throbbing sensation to her forehead as she suspects who it is.

Surely enough, Shinji Ikari leaps down the staircase with a shotgun in his hands, breathing heavily as he takes her sight in.

A large smile spreads on his face, for some reason infuriating her. "You're okay!" He sets the gun aside, "I knew that explosion was you! Rei was in the middle of packing when you came- wait. What's wrong with your leg?"

She responds by un-slinging the ham and shoves it in his hands, "Found some food." Asuka mutters as she continues climbing past him. She steps on her foot awkwardly and suppresses a wince.

He follows and reaches to grab her arm, "Asuka, wait. Let me help-"

"Don't you-" Asuka suddenly and violently thrashes her arms, "Fucking touch me." She hisses and continues the hobble up the stairs. Shinji silently follows.

The two arrive in the apartment with a cloud over Asuka's head, Pen-Pen bursts out of his fridge and warks at her cheerfully in greeting but she walks past, ignoring him. Pen-Pen lets out a soft chitter and looks at Shinji who shakes his head.

Next to the Panzerfaust is Rei, who is in the middle of packing a large duffle bag full of rifles as she stands up surprised. "Soryu. Where have you been? Are you hurt? We didn't see your flare-"

"Fuck off." Is all that Asuka mutters as she drops her bag and rifle and collapses into her bed, slowly curling into a ball.

The two siblings stare with concern, unsure what to say. Rei gently rubs Shinji's back. "I shall take the watch. Get some rest, brother." She says softly as she makes her ascent.

Everyone quietly goes about their night and behaves as if Asuka had never even left. Too scared to ask what had happened.


Asuka sets down the pen and rubs her eyes. She looks at the clock. Two AM. At this point the buzz from Rei's weed has dissipated as she wrote but felt no catharsis from recording her thoughts.

Remembering little Emiyo brought a flutter to her stomach at first, but then she got to the part of how cruelly she treated the girl. She was exactly like her when she was little, she knew exactly what the child needed to hear. And Asuka threw it all in her face anyway. She wanted to see her friends again so badly back then, but when she returned all she did was lash out at them. What was wrong with her?

She hadn't changed a bit, Asuka realized. Only in the superficial, outward sense. "I have to make this right." Somehow in some small form, at least. Asuka shoots out the desk to Shinji's room with no real topic in mind. All she knew was that she had to see him.

When she opened the door, she reminded herself to stay as distant as possible to avoid him smelling the disgusting pot smell off of her. "You said that THC can reduce the pain, right?"

"Well, that was Rei but, wait, how did you-"

She shakes a dismissive hand, "Doesn't matter. I'm in. I'll try a little bit. But not because I'm succumbing to peer pressure or anything."

"Yeah, that's cool. We're going hiking tomorrow if you wanna come with us."

Asuka stares at him. "Cool."

"Cool." Shinji replies back, coolly.

She nods awkwardly at him, "Cool." As she walks out she stops to stare at the helmet and slams the door.

Mission accomplished.


Rei sits alone on the park bench that Asuka had left her at, silently puffing off the shoddily rolled joint in contemplation."Radovid is far too unstable, volatile. Not to be trusted." She mutters to herself, "But neither is Emhyr. Cold, calculating… which is the lesser evil?"

Truly a dilemma.

A slurred voice echoes out, "An extra vacation day shimply isn't' feashible at this time, MAM… (Hic). How about I vacation my foot up your assh, you bony bitch?"

Rei instantly recognizes the voice. "Oh, shit." She whispers softly.

"Rei? Watcha doin' out here? Where's (Hic) Ashuka?" Misato stumbles towards her, a six pack in one hand and a beer in the other.

The Nephilim tries best to hide the joint and her red eyes, the whites now matching her irises. "She retired for the night. We had a good talk."

"Ahhh, that's great to hear, kiddo. C'mon lets get outta-" She sniffs the air loudly, "Whas' that shmell?"

Knowing the jig is up, Rei concedes and lifts the joint. For some reason, she felt no fear about her foster parents knowing, but the thought of Misato being disappointed in her however. "I... have taken a-"

Misato sits down and snags the joint from her hands, taking a long drag and stunning Rei. The two sit there quietly before the older woman breaks the silence. Suddenly appearing slightly more sober. "You know… for the first two years after Second Impact I couldn't talk. Didn't make a peep. Couldn't even look people in the eye."

Rei processes this. Like her friends, Misato never opens up to anyone. "And… what changed?"

Misato smirks at her and lifts up the six pack, she takes a generous swig. "Worksh like a charm. Pick yer poison I say."

The younger girl nods slowly, "I understand."

The woman who jump started the rebuilding of society, while juggling being a single mother laughs and ruffles Rei's hair. "Bahhh… you're a good kid. Do you what'cha gotta do." Rei smiles warmly at the gesture as Misato pulls her up and wraps an arm around her shoulders. "Now… come on! Lesh get outta this shit weather. And uh, don't tell your parentsh."

Rei lets out a soft giggle, "I have already told them."

"Then you got nothin' to worry about!"

The Nephilim smiles, "No, I suppose I don't."


A/N: Is that how that works?

Hey guys, remember how I said the next chapter would show Yui's experiment? Well... I lied! To be honest, I kinda realized I didn't have an Asuka led chapter yet which feels unacceptable when you're about to have a chapter coalescing all these characters in one adventure. I think the hiking trip will have what, six people total if Kensuke tags along? Really glad I got to have Asuka and Denki introduced since then, since I think he's a perfect foil for Yamagishi they're both completely full of shit and reflect on the state on the current world and its past in the post apocalypse.

On that note, no more post apocalypse chapters for a good minute, there's a whole lot of other things I'd love to explore. Particularly modern day shenanigans.

I'd like to thank SheriffJohnStone for giving me feedback and character notes for this chapter, as well as the Asushin Discord members and all of you guys for your input and support. Hope yall enjoyed this chapter. Stay tuned for Chapter 8: Happy Mothers Day.

Until then have a good one!