HOPEFUL DREAMS & HIDDEN DESIRES
Hi Guys :)
This is my first published fanfiction ever, and besides writing a Flying Doctors fanfiction for my BFF more than 10 years ago (nerdy, I know), I haven't written anything like this, so please be nice to me. Although I would very much appreciate comments and ideas from y'all, so let me know what you think. Just please use a decent tone with me.
Sara Ramirez's departure/break/whatever-it-is have left me absolutely devastated. I'm sure she has very good reasons to choose to leave, but I will miss her and her acting tremendesly. I have a general concern that this will mean a decrease in the amount of Calzona-fanfiction. This can't happen as I have truly enjoyed all the works that the talented writers on this site have published, so I figured what better time to try and give back than in times of such distress. I sincerely hope that Sara will return to Grey's some day (soon - Callie was my absolute favorite), and Calzona can get their happy ending at last.
This will be a very slow burn for our favorite ladies and there will be mentions of them with other people. Men to be specific. But I promise you that it will be a Calzona-fanfiction and they will find their way to each other eventually.
I have taken some freedom with some of the characters and some of the pairings in this fic. Hope you like it. This fanfiction was just an idea that kind of popped into my head one day, and I couldn't not write it the way I had imagined it.
I have to warn you all. English is not my first language. I apologize for any grammar, spelling or comprehension mistakes and confusions that should occur.
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's or any of the characters - they all belong to the lovely Shonda Rhimes and ABC. I'm just toying with them for fun with no intentions of profiting.
Anyway...here goes nothing:
CHAPTER 1
Arizona Robbins was nervous. Like really, really nervous. Which was kind of stupid, because this was what she had wished and worked for in the past five years. She was very aware of the fact that a lot of women would kill for the opportunity, she had gotten. Hell she even had a few friends that were probably conspiring how to kill her right this second.
She smiled to herself as she thought of how her closest friends had reacted, when she told them. While they were all very happy for her, it was also clear as day, that some of them had been more than a little jealous. She hadn't been allowed to tell that many yet, but she was sure, that after this week, her phone would be lighting up, like it was on fire.
The nervous butterflies in her stomach were getting bigger and bigger with every minute that passed, and as she reached the parking lot and stepped out of her car, they were basking away full swing in the pit of her stomach. Glancing down at her outfit again, she smoothed out the invisible crinkles in her blue shorts and shirt set. She looked good. After locking her car, she made her way toward the huge gated area.
She approached the security at the front gate and showed her ID along with a dimpled smile. The security guy looked her up and down before letting her pass without giving her as much as a smile. But that didn't matter to the blonde. Nothing could bring her down. Well except for the butterflies maybe. Arizona took in her surroundings and couldn't help but smile. This was it. This was her dream come true.
Callie Torres strolled through the familiar hallways. This had been like a second home to her for the last four years. These halls had seen her in her best and, recently, her worst, and she couldn't imagine ever leaving. Sure her career had taken of in the last two years. Offers were being given, and once in a while, when time allowed it, she let herself accept one, but leaving permanently was never an option.
As she rounded the corner and the conference room came into view, she caught a glimpse of one of her colleagues about to enter the room.
Hurrying to catch up with him, she called out "Hey Owen, wait up!"
Owen Hunt turned around and smiled at the Latina. "Callie, hi. How was your summer?"
Callie gave Owen a small smile and replied "It was good. Spent a lot of time by myself trying to adjust to it all you know. Yours?"
The ginger haired man looked away for a second and smiled big. He shook his head and turned his attention back to the brunette next to him. "It was amazing. I had really been looking forward to it, and it was everything, I had hoped it would be and more. But I'm sure, you already know that" he said as he smiled at Callie. "Thank you, by the way, I don't think I ever got to say that properly. We really appreciated the gesture." At those words Callie looked to the floor and sighed.
Owen reached for the Latina and pulled her into a hug that she instantly reciprocated. "I know it's hard, Cal. But everything will be okay. For what it's worth, I think he is an idiot for letting you go. But don't tell him I said that, I still have to work with him, you know, and we all know how he gets when people express, that they think he's made a wrong decision" he chuckled.
Callie couldn't help but chuckle as well before removing herself from the hug and looking at Owen with blank eyes. "Thank you, Hunt". She composed herself and reached for the doorknob. "Anyways, let's go see, what kind of trouble the rest of the crowd have been up to during summer".
At the main lobby, Arizona approached the reception. The butterflies were still in full swing, and she swallowed the lump in her throat as she addressed the receptionist. "Hi, I'm Arizona Robbins. I'm here to see Addison Montgomery".
One of the receptionists looked at Arizona with sparkling green eyes and gave her a big, genuine smile. "Ah, Miss Robbins, welcome. We've been looking forward to you joining us. Let me just call Addison, and then I'll give you your ID-card, keys and whatnot afterwards."
Arizona looked on, as the receptionist picked up the phone and dialed speed-dial one. 'Guess that comes with being the boss', Arizona thought to herself. With the receptionist busy on the phone, Arizona took the time to really take in the lobby.
It was huge, and beautifully done with white walls decorated with black and white posters, white ceilings with big chandelier-like lamps hanging from them, a receptionist desk build up in grey stones, that looked like they had just been picked up from the woods, fluffy grey couches with a table, that matched the receptionist desk, chairs and tables that complemented the couch area and big windows taking up a whole one side of the room. Scattered around the tables and on the floor were orchids in different sizes and shades of pink. It was breathtaking and Arizona couldn't believe her luck.
"Ms. Robbins, Addison asked me to show you to her office." Arizona was brought back to reality by the receptionist voice. The young woman got out of her chair, opened a drawer and pulled out some papers and a keychain with a set of keys and an ID-badge.
"These are yours. You will be introduced to everything later on. I'm Nicole Peterson by the way, and I am in charge of the reception Mondays through Thursdays. Friday through Sunday, my colleague Mari-Anne Summer will be in charge. If you have any questions regarding the logistics of this place, please don't hesitate to ask any of us". The woman smiled at Arizona as she led them to the elevators.
"Thank you that is very kind of you" Arizona responded with a grin looking on as the receptionist pressed the button for the 10th floor. The butterflies already seemed to rest a bit.
As Callie opened the door to the conference room a whirlwind of talking and laughter hit her and Owen. A dozen people filled up the room and the atmosphere was light and welcoming. Callie sucked in a breath and closed her eyes as a familiar voice hit her ears from somewhere in the room. She reopened them instantly however, when she was engulfed in a big tight hug.
"Callie, how are you girl?" Meredith Grey asked as she released the Latina from her loving embrace.
Callie smiled back at the petite woman and answered with a smirk "Good. Glad to be back in this place, ready to show you all how it's done!"
Meredith laughed and put a hand on the brunettes arm. "Pretty sure, you already did that. Don't think I haven't heard the rumors, Cal. You are going to win it" she finished with a wink.
Callie gave Meredith a big heartfelt smile in return, but twirled around when she felt the presence of another person approaching her from behind. And there he was. She spent her entire summer fearing how this was going to go, and as she took in his appearance, her smile faltered and tears automatically sprung to her eyes. It was obvious that he had lost a bit of weight, and he had bags under his eyes, that undoubtedly matched hers. But he was still handsome. He was still Mark.
"Hi", she stated tentively and with a bit of a crack in her voice.
Mark Sloan sent a small smile her way and took a step towards her into her personal space, as he reached for her left hand. He slowly traced his finger along her finger, where a wedding ring had rested just months prior.
"Hi yourself" he breathed out as he looked up at her and continued "How have you been?"
Callie looked as his blue sorrow filled eyes lined with tears that threatened to spill any second. "How the hell do you think I've been?!" The reply left Callie's mouth before she knew it, and she instantly closed her eyes in regret, as one single tear made its way down Marks gruff cheeks at her harsh words.
When she opened them again, Mark was still looking at her, albeit this time, his eyes weren't only filled with sorrow but also hurt. "It wasn't working anymore, Cal, and you know it as well as I do. It was the hardest decision of my life, and I mi…"
"Don't" Callie cut him of "Just don't. Not here, not now." She pleaded with him. At that Mark nodded his head once. She cleared her throat and removed her hand from his hold. "We should probably take our seats. Addison is going to be here any minute" the Latina said and passed her soon to be ex-husband to take her seat at the table.
Arizona reached a shaking hand up and knocked at the door. Nicole had left her outside the office of the one and only Addison Montgomery, and Arizona had taken a moment before building up the courage to knock at the door. A faint "come in" was heard, and Arizona turned the knob. The office was big and very homey with a fake fireplace and couches taking up one side of the room, while a big desk took up the other. Behind the desk the blue-grey eyes of Addison Montgomery peeked up at the intruder.
"Arizona welcome back. It's so good to see you again" Addison stated as she rose from her chair and walked towards the blonde and held out her hand for Arizona to take. Arizona reached out and gave the impeccable dressed woman a firm handshake.
"Thank you Ms. Montgomery. It's good to see you too". Arizona couldn't help but smile really big at the redhead in front of her.
"Oh please, it's Addison. We're not that formal here" Addison waved her hands at her new employee, while going back to her desk to collect some papers. "Let's go downstairs. The rest of the lot is waiting, and I can guarantee, that they are all very intrigued about what is going on. You have been my private secret for the summer and they are all about to explode from being left out in the dark" Addison laughed as she ushered Arizona out of her office and towards the waiting elevator.
As they stepped in the elevator, Addison pressed for the 2nd floor, and as the door closed, she turned to Arizona "How are you holding up? I guess this must be a little overwhelming. Not to mention the fact, that you haven't really been apple to gossip and squeal with anyone about it. You did tell someone, right? To be able to share something like this is a pretty big deal" she smiled towards the blonde.
Arizona smiled back and let one of her own hands rest on her chest just above her heart before replying "Oh my God, you have no idea. I have been a nervous wreck since you called me and told me, the job was mine. Well first I did a very wild, very long happy dance in my living room, and then I called a friend to gossip and squeal, as you so delicate put it", Arizona chuckled as Addison's smile grew at the blondes admission "but more importantly I am SO happy and grateful to have gotten this chance, and I can't wait to see, what you got planned for me" the blonde genuine smiled at the woman next to her as the elevator dinged signaling, that they had arrived at their designated floor.
Callie sat at her usual spot around the table. Addison's chair was still vacant, but apart from that, almost every other chair had slowly been filled by her friends and colleagues. Except the one next to her. She looked at the chair at her left side that was also vacant. The chair would normally be occupied by Callie's longtime friend, Erica Hahn, but she had gotten a better offer, and had left for the summer like the rest of them, only difference was, that she wasn't returning by the end of the break. Callie wondered for a second, why the chair was still there. Why not just remove it.
Callie was pulled out of her musings, as April Kepner's voice reached her from the other side of the empty chair. "It's so weird, that she's not here. I mean, she's the first one to leave in the time that I've been here. And even though I didn't talk to her that much, when we weren't in here, she was a part of this, you know?" April stated as she looked over at Callie.
Callie smiled and replied "Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm really going to miss her, and she will be hard to do without. But I'm sure Addison's got a plan. She always does." The Latina stated with certainty.
At that, the doors to the conference room opened, and Addison strode in with a blonde woman in thow. Addison stood in the gap in the middle of the room and cleared her throat to get everyone's attention.
"Welcome back from summer break people. I hope you all enjoyed your welcomed time off. Now it is back to work, and you know I expect nothing but the very best from all of you" the redhead said with a smile to the people gathered around her. She then turned her attention back to the blonde, put a hand on her shoulder and continued "This is Arizona Robbins, and she will be joining us to fill in the void after Erica's departure. It will be big shoes to fill, but I am more than confident, that Arizona will be up for the task. I picked her myself, and she is very good. I will continue to wonder, why no one snitched her up until now. But that was just my luck I guess."
Arizona felt her cheeks heat up at the redhead's words. And then the butterflies were back. Like really back, and for a second Arizona feared, that she might have to throw up right here in front of her new colleagues. She averted her eyes to the floor to compose herself.
Callie watched as Arizona blushed, then lost all color in her face before she looked to the floor. It made Callie smile. She liked, when people came in to this humble. Although she didn't like the look of overwhelming nervousness on the newcomers face. The brunette caught the blue eyes of the woman as she looked up again, and sent her an encouraging smile.
Arizona made eye contact with Callie Torres. THE Callie Torres. The smile on the other woman's face however helped ease the blonde's nerves to a bearable level, and she gave a small, grateful smile back.
"Arizona, you will have Erica's old spot at the table. It's right over there between Callie and April. I'm sure, they will be very welcoming to you", Addison said and sent Callie and April a pointed glare. Callie smirked at her boss and friend and sent Addison a smile that said "Chill, I won't kill her".
At this Arizona made her way over to the vacant chair next to the Latina. As she approached, Callie pulled out the chair for her, and gestured for Arizona to sit down. "Don't worry, I won't bite – well unless I'm told to, you know how it is" Callie said and smiled big at the blonde as she sank down in the chair.
The blonde gave Callie an uneasy smile, and Callie thought she caught something similar to awe in the blonde's eyes as she looked at her.
'Oh my God, oh my God, OH MY GOD' Arizona thought to herself, as she sat next to the one and only Callie Torres. Naturally she knew and had heard a lot about this woman, albeit recently it had been more in regards to the woman's personal life, than anything else, but Arizona knew, she was a force to be reckoned with. The woman was unbelievable, and Arizona was stoked to sit next to her, and kind of baffled, when the woman started talking to her. Callie Torres was without a doubt the most talented person in this room.
Arizona gave a nervous smile to the woman and replied "Well, that goes both ways". That was all she managed to get out before a ginger haired woman on the other side of Arizona addressed her.
"Hi, I'm April Kepner. It's very nice to have you here with us. I think we are going to be great friends. And don't worry about the big shoes. They weren't that big, and I'm sure, that you will fit right into them" the woman warmly smiled at Arizona, and it put the blonde's nerves even more at ease.
Before she knew it a nameplate was put in front of her at the table, and Arizona couldn't remember a time, she had smiled bigger than in that moment. It was awesome, and she once again thanked her lucky stars and Addison Montgomery for being there.
Then a thick stack of papers were dumped on the table in front of her, and the smile got impossibly bigger. Arizona smoothed her hand over the papers and the words on the front that read: 'HEART AND HOSPITAL, season 5, episode 01' and then right below 'Arizona Robbins as Dr. Jessica Carter'. Tears of happiness welled in the blondes eyes. 'I can do this. This is my well-deserved pay off to all those auditions in the past five years' the blonde thought to herself, as she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up to meet the gaze and smile of the Latina woman next to her, before once again reading the words on the front and then scrolling to the first page of the script.
So...what do you think? :) Is it worth continuing?
Can't wait to hear from you.
Lots of love /Julie
