Hello Lovelies,
I hope you've had a good weekend. Here's the next chapter! I've been off work this week on holiday, hence getting to push out two chapters close together. :)
I hope you like it. More coming soon!
Much Love,
Chelsea x
It was bright and early on Thursday morning and Christian and I were sat waiting outside Dr Greene's office. Christian had called last night for an urgent appointment, buttering up the assistant to fit me in at short notice. She didn't take much persuading. His abilities to charm anyone wasn't limited to just face-to-face meetings, it seemed.
Our hands were intertwined on his lap, my palm significantly sweatier than his. I couldn't stop fidgeting. My legs bounced up and down, my nerves on high alert. Christian, however, seemed cool, calm and collected.
"How are you doing it?" I sighed, whispering. He frowned at me. "I'm a bag of nerves over here. You're so calm."
"On the outside, maybe," he snorted. "Inside I'm dying. I'm about ready to barge in there and get this show on the road. How long is she going to take? We've been here for ages."
"It's only been a few minutes," I said, checking my watch for the hundredth time. "She'll be out in –"
The door in front of us clicked and opened wide, Dr Greene instantly filling the doorway and staring straight at me. She wore a simple black suit and a white coat, with a stethoscope around her neck.
"Ana," she smiled, nodding me inside her office.
I stood and pulled Christian to his feet. He felt like a dead weight, but he rose and followed in my wake.
Dr Greene looked between us. Concern twitched the corners of her eyes.
"Is it okay if he comes in with me?" I checked. "I want him with me."
"As long as that's what you want, the more the merrier," she nodded. "Come in and take a seat."
I glanced at Christian. He smiled, taking no offence to Dr Greene's comment. I imagined some men might, the controlling and suspicious types. The thought saddened me to my core.
I moved through the office and made my way to the chairs in front of the large glass desk. I sat down on the furthest seat away, Christian settling down beside me. He didn't let go of my hand. I don't think he could, considering how tight I was gripping his fingers.
Dr Greene closed the door and joined us, taking her seat opposite. She checked something on her computer screen and then gave me her full attention.
"So, how can I help you today?"
I gulped hard and exhaled a deep breath.
"Um, I've taken some pregnancy tests," I began, my voice a little shaky. "And they came back positive."
"Okay," she nodded. She turned her focus to her computer and began typing. "How many tests have you taken?"
"Twelve."
Her eyes widened, brows lifting high up her face.
"I know," I snorted. "It's excessive, but we wanted to be sure."
"You'd be surprised how many people do something similar," she smiled softly. She studied her notes. "The last time you visited me it was for the combined oral contraceptive pill. Did you stop taking it in order to become pregnant?"
"No," I shook my head. "I was still taking it up until two days ago."
"So this was unplanned?"
I nodded.
"I did everything right," I blurted. "I followed your advice and I took it the same time every day. I haven't been unwell or taken anything else. It's just sort of happened and –"
She raised her hand to stop my rambling. She gave me another smile.
"It happens," she explained. "No birth control is one hundred percent effective. There can be a whole list of reasons why it fails, and sometimes there is no obvious reason why. Occasionally, an egg is still released and fertilised as normal. Mother Nature can find a way to outsmart the best of us."
I felt my shoulders drop upon hearing that. I felt vindicated somehow, even though I knew I hadn't done anything wrong.
"How do you feel about it?" she asked.
"Happy," I replied. I looked at Christian and he nodded, smiling. I grinned. "We're both happy. Shocked, yeah, but we're excited."
"So, to check, if we confirm you are pregnant today, the pregnancy is something you would like to continue with?"
"Yes," I said without hesitation.
"Okay," she nodded. "Now, do you know when your last pill period was?"
"The month before last," I explained. "I had some spotting last month, but it was hardly anything."
She typed something out and then turned to us.
"Normally, I'd ask you to do a urine sample so I can run a quick test but seeing as you've taken twelve tests already, we can proceed straight to a scan."
"Right," I hummed. "A sonogram?"
"Yes," she said. "We'll start with an abdominal scan and see if we can get a clear enough image. If we can't, we may need to revert to a transvaginal. Does that sound okay?"
"Sure," I agreed.
Christian gave my fingers a gentle squeeze. He winked at me, a sign of support and an attempt to calm me down.
I laid back on the bed and rearranged the paper gown I had been given to wear. A cream blanket had been placed across my hips by Dr Greene's assistant, and I pulled up the gown as requested to show my stomach.
Christian was perching on the chair next to the bed. Sitting wasn't the right word for what he was doing, his ass barely touching the plastic. He looked ready to pounce.
Dr Greene rolled her seat closer to me and began setting up the sonogram. She squeezed lubricant onto the wand before placing it on my skin. I jolted at the coldness of it. She gave me a sympathetic nod as she started pressing down on the area above my pubic bone.
"Try to relax," she said to me. She turned the screen away from our line of sight. "I know it's uncomfortable, but it's important that you relax and keep as still as possible."
I studied her face as she moved the wand in various directions and tapped something on the machine. I tried to figure out her expression, but she gave nothing away. She had a stern poker face and it did nothing to settle my concerns.
What is she seeing? Has she found it? Is there anything to find?
My heart was racing as she stared at the screen.
"Here we go," she declared. She spun the screen around and showed us a slightly blurry, black and white image. "I'm happy to confirm you are pregnant."
I held my breath as I looked at the picture.
"This is your uterus," she explained, pointing to a large circular shape. She moved her finger to a bean like smudge at the bottom. "And this is your baby."
"That's… that's the baby?" I asked, squinting my eyes at the smudge. "That's it?"
"Yes," she nodded.
"And there's just one in there?" I quickly checked.
"Yes. There's only the one foetus."
She pressed something and suddenly the image was moving. The smudge shifted slightly, but inside it was a definite flicker.
"Do you see this movement here?" she asked. I nodded. "That's the heartbeat."
"Wow…" Christian breathed. I turned my chin to him and saw that he was mesmerised by the picture. "Everything looks okay? Everything's normal?"
"Absolutely fine," she smiled. "Based on the measurements I've taken, I'd say you're around eight weeks pregnant."
Eight weeks.
"How big is it?" I asked.
"Approximately 5mm."
A tiny smudge. Barely a blob, but it's been in there for eight whole weeks.
"You'll be able to see more at the twelve-week check-up," she told us. "That will be your next appointment with me. In the meantime, I want to run some bloods to check all of your levels, and I'm going to start you on a course of vitamins."
"Okay…"
"Do you take any multivitamins at the moment?"
"No," I shook my head. "Is that bad?"
"It's important we start you on folic acid," she explained. "It's vital for development. I'll get you a script printed. I'll also print off some information about what foods are good for you, what you should avoid eating. The activities we suggest you refrain from, etc."
"Will I have caused the baby any problems by still taking the pill?" I enquired. "Even though I didn't know I was pregnant?"
"No," she replied. "There is nothing to worry about. Everything looks absolutely normal."
I breathed a deep sigh of relief.
"I'll leave you to get dressed," she smiled. "Come join me at my desk when you're done and I'll talk you through the bloods I want you to have taken."
I stared at her, wide eyed.
She rested her hand on my arm.
"It's a lot to take in, so have a minute," she urged me. "Let it soak in. There's no rush."
"Thank you," I nodded. I sniffed back a stray tear. "It's a bit overwhelming."
"Take all the time you need," she nodded and moved back behind the privacy screens. "I'll print you off a copy of the sonogram, so you can take a picture home with you."
We left the doctor's office in a euphoric haze, the world around us seeming different somehow. Christian commented how everything seemed less annoying than usual – like the traffic, people barging their way down the sidewalks, the tiresome rain that refused to stop. None of it bothered us.
I couldn't shift the smile from my face. I looked around at the other people on the streets and thought about the secret I'm hiding deep inside me. For once in my life, I was happy to keep a secret.
Christian dropped me off at SIP on his way to work, agreeing to pick me up at 5:30pm.
For lunch, he had sent over a package from a deli across town. It was full of greens and protein, with bottles of juice and water, and a delicious blueberry muffin. I didn't even mind his fussing.
Because it wasn't just me he was looking after now…
He was outside waiting on the sidewalk at 5:25, having sent me a text to say he had arrived. I joined him a few minutes later, sliding into his warm embrace.
"You okay?" he checked.
"I am," I nodded. "Thank you for lunch."
"Anytime," he hummed. He kissed my forehead and turned me towards the car, opening the door and helping me inside. "Let's go home, baby."
Taylor greeted me from behind the wheel, his eyes crinkling as he smiled. He was carrying a wide grin.
I narrowed my stare and studied his expression for a moment.
"He's told you, hasn't he?" I asked, shaking my head. Taylor's grin spread wider across his face. "I should've guessed he wouldn't be able to keep quiet."
Christian joined me in the back and I swatted his arm.
"What was that for?" he frowned, jerking his head back.
"You told Taylor!" I shrieked. "Without me!"
"I'm sorry," he squirmed, scrunching up his nose. "I couldn't help myself. I had to tell someone."
I rolled my eyes.
"You're not mad, are you?"
"No," I sighed. "But I'm telling Jaz and Sawyer myself."
"Okay."
"And Mrs Jones."
He pursed his lips.
I cocked my head to the side.
"You told her too?" I arched my brow.
"She prepares our meals," he protested, holding up a hand in defence. "There's a whole list of foods you can't eat anymore. I've been reading the sheets Dr Greene gave us. There's a lot you can't have."
"Been doing your research?" I teased.
"Absolutely," he nodded. "I'm not ashamed to say I've spent most of the afternoon scouring the internet."
"Just how many websites have you checked?"
"Too many," he admitted. "And I may have ordered some books… they're arriving tomorrow."
I giggled at his eagerness and settled comfortably into my seat.
"I'm going to warn you now," he spoke up. I rolled my head towards me. "I am going to be a nightmare. Worse than normal. I will be all over you like a rash."
"I know," I nodded. "I'll try not to get pissed off at you."
"I'll try not to be totally suffocating."
"Good luck with that," I snorted.
He picked up my hand and raised it to his mouth. He kissed my knuckles lightly.
"I don't want to tell anyone else," I told him. "Not until after the wedding."
"That's fair," he agreed. "It's still early days."
"It's different, telling the people who spend the most time with us," I said. "But let's get the wedding out the way and then we can revel in baby-mania with the family."
He grinned at me.
"Cribs, strollers, car seats, monitors…" he reeled off, getting more and more excited by each item. "You can bet your ass I'm going to research the fuck out of everything. I am going to be an expert on all things baby before they're born."
"Knock yourself out, darling," I said. I rested my free hand on my stomach. "I'll let you deal with all of that. I'm going to concentrate on growing the little bean."
He laughed at my choice of nickname for the baby.
"I like little bean," he nodded. "They did look like a bean."
"Little baby bean," I smirked.
