Chapter CXXXVI – The Benefit of the Doubt

Bishop slid his empty tankard away from himself across the table before he moved closer to Aeyrin and draped his arm over her waist with a bored expression on his face.

They've been waiting for Faldaen for hours already. It was well past mid-day. The two of them had woken up shortly after sundown, had a quick breakfast and donned their armors, but now that seemed to have been rather premature. When Faldaen didn't show up in the common room for an hour after that, unresponsive to the knocking on his room door, they took off their armors again, and remained idling in the common room, waiting for hours.

Aeyrin was getting increasingly nervous the longer her father didn't emerge from his door and Bishop was just becoming angrier and more frustrated. He would have been somewhat fine just waiting with her in the tavern, if she could concentrate on anything else than staring at that door nervously, but this was no fun. He passed the time by pawing at her, trying to distract her from the situation and it did always work for a while, but she didn't stay distracted for long. Her gaze always returned to the door and a scowl returned to her face.

Bishop pulled her to himself one more time, pressing her hips to his on the bench, before he leaned down to nip at her shoulder playfully. She turned to give him a brief smile, but yet again, she moved her eyes back to the closed door of her father's room a second later, as if staring at it would help anything.

Bishop ran his hand over her flank slowly while he continued kissing along her shoulder towards her neck. He was adamant at distracting her properly and he pressed her even closer then, before flicking his tongue on the spot on her neck that still had a vague trace of the mark he had left there a few nights ago.

"Oh… Bish, don't do that now, please." Aeyrin disentangled herself from him quickly and she ran her hand over her neck nervously before lighting it up with magic to erase any trace of him with an embarrassed blush. She wasn't sure if she felt more guilty about doing that, or more confused about why the idea of her father pondering about the origins of that mark made her so uncomfortable. It was odd. He was like a stranger to her now – she had certainly never met this particular version of him before. But she still got so frazzled about every interaction with him, even those she would never think twice about with other strangers.

Perhaps she was hoping too much that their relationship would develop in a somewhat favorable way, especially after yesterday's rocky start. She was overthinking every little thing. She was even nervous about knocking on his door to wake him up.

Her behavior reminded her too much of how she used to tiptoe around him when he was in one of his… moods. She was always so scared of him flipping out. It felt like such a defeat, to still suffer from this trepidation around him, but she couldn't help herself.

Bishop shook his head as he watched her heal the last traces of the mark on her neck rather more frantically than necessary. When she was done, he turned his eyes towards the door again. This was getting frustrating. Normally he wouldn't mind lazing around the tavern with her, even with that Orc around, but she hardly said a word at all and she wasn't really responsive to anything else he was doing to pass the time.

"Knock again?" he asked after a while with a bored expression on his face.

"N-no. I knocked a little while ago… it's too soon," Aeyrin shook her head vehemently in response. She didn't want to appear too desperate or overeager. And she didn't want to irk her father by bothering him too much, thus starting off the day in a tense mood.

"You're weird around him," Bishop scoffed, scowling at her.

"I know," she sighed in resignation while she avoided meeting his eyes.

"Why are you being so fucking… considerate over every little thing? He's the one who's been fucking up your life! Shouldn't he be the one to be bending over backwards to have you give him any time of day at all?" Bishop growled morosely. She's been fidgety all morning. He understood that she wanted some closure on the entire thing, but she actually looked hopeful for all this ending in some happy family reunion. He didn't get that at all. Hasn't that wretch done enough to her? Hasn't he been acting suspicious enough for her?

Finally, the door to Faldaen's room opened. The elf walked out towards them rather briskly and energetically. The fidgeting, twitching and jerking that he suffered from the entire previous night was not even perceptible now.

"Morning," he smiled at them widely as he sat himself down by the table opposite them.

"'Morning'?" Bishop grumbled. He didn't even have to look Aeyrin's way to know that she was giving him a chastising look.

"Ah… yes…" Faldaen chuckled a little with a wry smile on his face. "I suppose you were expecting me sooner. I'm sorry about that. It's just… ever since I stopped with the... you know… I've been sleeping like a baby."

"For fourteen hours?" Bishop narrowed his eyes at him. There was no way that he'd been sleeping all that time. He was up to something. Bishop doubted that the man would be keeping himself up by reading or something like that with the upcoming journey on his mind. Could he even read? Well… that was hardly important. What was important was the fact that this was hardly normal.

Faldaen only shrugged in response without elaborating further.

"Well… it's not like we never sleep in until past noon," Aeyrin mumbled under her breath with a slight nervous chuckle. She really didn't want to start their day off with a fight.

"Yeah, when we fuck all night…" Bishop murmured, smirking a bit. It made Aeyrin flush in frantic embarrassment instantly and she threw him an incredulous look. Luckily, he said it quietly enough. Faldaen didn't look like he had heard anything.

"W-well… how about you get some breakfast and we can head out right after that?" she stammered nervously, still flustered from Bishop's comment.

"Oh, no need, little rabbit. We can head out right now," Faldaen gave her a brief nod while he clapped his hands together to insinuate his eagerness to get going.

"Uuuh… you don't want to eat?" she gave him an uncertain expression. Come to think of it, she didn't see him eat the previous night either. Wasn't he starving after the journey? She could always eat a horse after their travels.

"I had a ration, rabbit. Don't worry yourself," he merely dismissed her as he got up from the table and looked at them expectantly.

"We won't be stopping until nightfall… with how much time we lost here," Bishop gave him a level look, but Faldaen didn't seem fazed by it one bit. He merely shrugged in response. In fact, he seemed rather cheerful the entire time.

Maybe he really was excited for the journey.

His behavior was a little… peculiar, but on the other hand, Aeyrin had no idea what physical demands overcoming his addiction put his body and mind through. Again, she reminded herself that she should give him the benefit of the doubt.

But Bishop's constant suspicious stares did not really help.

"Seriously? Nothing?" Bishop shook his head at Faldaen in disbelief.

"My funds are not so limitless that I could afford to sprawl on expensive equipment," Faldaen only shrugged at him in response.

"You don't even have a fucking dagger? How were you planning on travelling across the entire province with no weapons at all?" Bishop yelled at him. It was too weird. Nobody who left the city walls left completely unarmed. Even people who had no fighting skills could fucking stab an attacker with some luck.

"I've done just fine so far," Faldaen shrugged again disinterestedly.

"There's a fucking war going on! And dragons! And there's bandits everywhere! How the fuck did you expect to travel here all alone like that?" Even the carriage drivers carried weapons and knew how to use them to some measure.

"Well I'm not alone now, am I?" Faldaen chuckled and he gave Aeyrin a brief grateful look while a smile spread on his face.

"Y-yeah… we can handle things on the way there," she turned to Bishop with a little wry smile, as if she was trying to calm his outbursts with her expression.

"That's not even the point!" Bishop continued. "How the fuck did you get to Morthal like this? How did you even travel through Cyrodiil like this? It's not like it's any better there! See, that's why you don't see fucking 'peddlers' on the roads! They'd have to pay for mercenaries to protect them," he spat at Faldaen with narrowed eyes. That wretch was lying through his teeth this entire time. Nothing he had said so far made any sense! If he was already making shit up, why not just say that he was travelling with a caravan or something? This was so daft and transparent.

Bishop could see that Aeyrin wondered about the same things, but, after a while, she just sighed and shook her head, deciding to ignore it. What the fuck was she doing? Why was she overlooking all this weirdness constantly? Did that fucker honestly still mean something to her, to make her so desperate to salvage this? Why?

"I guess I've been lucky so far," Faldaen shrugged again before he somewhat impatiently inclined his head towards the road leading out of town.

Bishop scowled and shook his head again, but Aeyrin placed a hand on his shoulder gently with a sigh, signaling her reluctance to continue this discussion.

"Whatever. We shouldn't be taking the roads anyways. Less of a chance to be jumped by bandits in the wilderness. And I'm not willing to watch his ass through that," Bishop rolled his eyes while he folded his arms across his chest. At the very least, Faldaen's unpreparedness gave him an excuse to take Aeyrin through the Rift in his own way, away from any potential major threats.

Especially away from the roads around Lost Knife.

While their trek has been uncharacteristically peaceful with the routes that Bishop had led them through, their conversation was not.

Aeyrin tried to talk to her father, asking about his business, about his partner and about the goods that he was actually selling, but the man was incredibly tight-lipped. She thought that he may have been too guarded to answer at first. She may have still had a bit of a skeptical tone in her voice after every answer he gave her, but as the conversation carried on, it became a bit more clear that that wasn't the problem.

After every word Faldaen said, Bishop couldn't help but poke holes into his stories. And in the meantime, he kept throwing suspicious looks the man's way whenever the conversation stalled. Aeyrin knew that he was kind of trying to protect her, in a way, and it wasn't as if she didn't notice the strange behavior from her father, but he was still overdoing it. As irrational as it was, she would have rather ignored the suspicions and see what would come of their journey, than pummeling him with constant doubts and questions.

This way, she would always just wonder if she drove him away with this, when he reached out after all those years. She didn't want that. Either he would prove that his intentions were not what he claimed or… well… she wasn't even sure what she was hoping for. A warm familial bond? She used to want that… but now… she wasn't so sure. Everything was just… strange and uncomfortable now.

She chastised Bishop several times to make him ease up, but it was like he was obsessed, always trying his hardest to undermine anything that her father said. It was starting to grate on her nerves. Why couldn't he just leave this up to her?

They managed to make good time in the end. Faldaen was, surprisingly enough, able to keep up with their pace. She would have expected him to have more physical limitations, but other than the all too familiar occasional twitches and shakes, he was surprisingly spritely.

Her father got a little freaked out once Karnwyr tracked them down and joined them, but after Aeyrin had assured him numerous times that the wolf would not harm any of them, he seemed to relax at least a little. Karnwyr did not take to him at all. Every time Faldaen got even a little closer to him, the wolf flinched and ran off a bit further away. But at least he wasn't growling and barking at him. He was a wolf, after all, he would hardly get friendly with everyone that fast. Although he had no problem with Aeyrin or Lydia from the very beginning. Strange.

They made camp by the edge of Whiterun Hold, far enough so that there would be no issues with the Hold guards regarding Bishop's banishment.

If their journey went this smoothly tomorrow, they'd be able to make it to Faldaen's meeting in time, before the next nightfall.

They sat at the campfire silently in the eve, with tension palpable in the air.

Bishop was preparing a meal for them with a morose face while Aeyrin threw occasional tentative looks towards her father. She felt Bishop's eyes dart to her every now and then, as if he was checking her emotional state periodically. It was starting to make her angry.

"Do you camp like this often? It's kind of cold," Faldaen chuckled while he draped his fur clothing tightly around himself.

"Yeah… pretty often. The cities aren't that close and there's usually much more battles on the road. We need to rest more then," Aeyrin smiled at him slightly.

"How do you keep warm, rabbit? The fire is hardly enough," Faldaen shook his head in exasperation as he moved closer to the fire.

She flushed at the question instantly, and Bishop's snort echoing from behind her hardly helped. Her father still looked like he expected an answer, making her even more uncomfortable, but luckily, for once, Bishop's question saved her from the awkwardness, rather than making it worse.

"What shit did you say you sell again?" he looked at Faldaen as he joined them by the fire, placing four slabs of beef into a pot and by the flames. He had already asked about that before. He probably only did that just to spare Aeyrin the uncomfortable fluster. She threw him a slight grateful smile before she looked back at her father curiously.

"Just… some trinkets from Hammerfell. Nothing of interest to you, I'm sure," Faldaen dismissed him again with an absent smile.

"Try me," Bishop smirked at him and his expression twisted into a challenging look.

"He's like a damn bloodhound, rabbit," Faldaen chuckled a bit nervously when he turned his gaze to Aeyrin, as if he was hoping to escape Bishop's scrutiny that way.

"What's with the evasiveness, old man?" Bishop scoffed, prodding again.

"I… I'm not evasive…" Faldaen stammered a little. He reached back for his large pack and he promptly pulled it into his lap. He opened it, keeping it close to his body while the flap of the pack covered the contents all the while. He rummaged inside with a shaky hand and the sounds of clattering bottles and some metals began echoing through their small camp.

Finally, he seemed to find what he was looking for.

He pulled out a small bottle made out of red cut glass with a strange liquid inside victoriously, presenting it to them.

Bishop snatched it from him right away and he didn't hesitate before taking the delicate lid off. He studied the liquid and he leaned his head forward to sniff it with narrowed eyes. He flinched instantly as a strong smell assaulted his senses. It seemed like some sort of a fragrance. Huh… he didn't actually expect him to produce some 'goods'. Although who was to say that Faldaen even had more of these – enough to sell to some supplier. He did get very evasive about the questions.

Bishop returned the bottle to him rather morosely before he turned his attention back to the meat by the fire. This didn't exactly work out the way he had planned.

"So you sell these around Cyrodiil?" Aeyrin smiled at Faldaen. She was rather relieved that he actually did have some goods with him. Bishop was getting into her head with his suspicions.

"Yes, rabbit. It's been going alright so far. But they're not that rare in Cyrodiil. My partner hoped that they'd catch on here more, but to be honest, I have my doubts. I don't think that the Nords even bathe, let alone use things like this," he snickered in response.

Bishop raised a brow at him in exasperation. He got the urge to spew some similar insult at him. The cannibal thing was popular among Nords, but he stopped himself instantly. Aeyrin hated this sort of stuff, and stooping down to that wretch's level would hardly be helpful at this point.

Aeyrin only shook her head disapprovingly, but she didn't comment. She went to such lengths not to antagonize him in any way, it made Bishop furious. Why would that fucker deserve such consideration? He didn't get why she didn't confront him about any of that shit he put her through. He could see it was on her mind constantly, but she always stopped herself. He got why she got this reserved around the people she was wary of antagonizing, those who could actually make her life troublesome, like the Stormcloaks, but what could this pathetic man do? He was a lowlife. He was hardly dangerous.

The food was finally done and Bishop whistled to call Karnwyr over to them. He tossed one of the meats to the eager wolf when he rushed over to them, before he handed the second one to Aeyrin and took the third one for himself. Then he passed the pot and what was left in it over to Faldaen.

"Oh. I'm good, thank you," Faldaen smiled wryly, letting the pot lay where it was.

Aeyrin and Bishop looked at him in confusion. He hasn't eaten all day, at least not that they've seen. This was… strange. Aeyrin wondered if it was possible that he lost his sense of taste after the years of abuse to his body. Perhaps then he wouldn't feel the need to eat anything but rations, but it was still rather strange to refuse. It was still sustenance.

"A-are you sure? We've been walking for a while… don't you need to gather some strength?" she looked at him with concern and a lot of confusion.

"Don't worry about me, rabbit. I've grown used to the long treks," Faldaen dismissed her with a wave of his hand and he gave her a brief smile.

So has she, but she still needed to eat.

She remembered having to force-feed him once when he was out of it for days, to ensure that he wouldn't starve. It wouldn't have even occurred to her back then, she was busy finding enough food for herself, but Ri'zhassa instructed her to do it. He couldn't lose a customer because of a mindless delirium after all.

She chased away the memories with a brisk shake of her head and she began concentrating on her food. She kind of lost the appetite, no matter how good Bishop's meal was. But she still forced herself to chew on it in the uncomfortable atmosphere. She could still see Bishop throwing Faldaen suspicious looks constantly and her mood was getting even worse by how tense he was making things.

"So… is there any place you can wash up or something? Or do the Nords really not do that?" Faldaen chuckled after a while of uncomfortable silence.

Bishop narrowed his eyes at him again, but he answered nonetheless: "There's a pond some way down over there." He pointed into the direction of the small pond near their camp.

Faldaen rose to his feet while they were still chewing through the food. He closed his pack again and strapped it up around his shoulders.

"You're taking all that with you?" Bishop scowled at him. Why would he drag that enormous thing to just go to the pond?

Faldaen stopped himself, pondering a while. "I… guess I was just used to having to watch over my things when I travel alone," he chuckled again a bit nervously.

"You can leave it now, can't you?" Bishop nodded at him with a level look. Aeyrin didn't get why he even concerned himself with this, but it was a bit silly to drag all those things along when they could just look after them.

Faldaen dropped his pack again in resignation before he opened it and rummaged around. He pulled out some other fur clothes carefully before he headed towards the direction Bishop had pinpointed earlier. He looked back at them by the fire a few times, as if he was still checking on his things.

There was another moment of silence when Faldaen finally left completely, before Bishop threw Aeyrin a conspiratorial look.

Divines, what was he planning now? He threw the last piece of the meat into his mouth and then he rose from the fire and walked over to Faldaen's pack.

"What are you doing?" Aeyrin scowled at him.

"Seeing what he's hiding. You know that he's been acting suspicious all this time. I bet we can find out why…" he turned away from her while he opened her father's pack and peered inside.

"Bishop," she said in a chastising tone. He was getting so obsessive. She rose to her feet as well and walked over to him while he rummaged around the pack.

There were a couple of other cut glass bottles hidden there, but not many, only five or six – hardly enough for a proper trade. Especially to people owning an entire fucking warehouse. He would have expected them to want to buy a lot more goods, maybe even full crates.

The pack was stuffed with clothes and rags, all hiding either the little bottles, but there were also other vials in there. He pulled out one of the unfamiliar bottles. It looked like a potion, but the liquid was clear. No potions had clear liquid. And this was definitely not a convenient substitute for a waterskin.

"Bishop, stop. Put that back," Aeyrin scowled at him again. This was making her so uncomfortable. Her father could have come back at any second. And even if he didn't, she wanted to give him a chance!

"Hold on, sweetness. What's this?" Bishop opened the bottle curiously, sniffing it. It did have some faint odor. Skooma didn't have that. But then again, Faldaen really didn't seem like he was using that stuff. Tasting it was probably a bad idea though… it could have been anything.

"Bishop!" Aeyrin snapped at him, making his head jerk back towards her at last. She was scowling at him fiercely and her arms were folded across her chest.

He closed the unidentified bottle before he briskly put it back into the pack. He closed it entirely and he rose to his feet, facing her.

"Why are you doing this?" she shook her head at him with disapproval.

"What? What do you mean? I'm trying to look out for you! I'm trying to find out why he's lying!" Bishop gave her a deep scowl. His voice was so defensive.

"I told you that I want to give him a chance! I told you to stop antagonizing him and this is what you do instead?!" the anger welled up in her. But she wasn't even sure if she was that angry at Bishop, or at how poorly everything was going in general. He certainly wasn't helping things though, that was for sure.

"Ladyship, you can see that he's lying too. I don't know what he's up to, but don't you want to prevent whatever it is?" Bishop looked at her a little desperately, as if he was only now realizing how upset she was.

"I… I know that he's being… odd. And, yes, he's probably lying about something. But maybe it's not… maybe he's in some kind of danger or something, or maybe… I… I don't know. Can't you just understand that I want to give him the benefit of the doubt? Can't you understand that if I don't, I'll… I'll just go back to wondering again… if…" If there was some way I could have helped him. She trailed off and her gaze turned down to the ground, avoiding his eyes.

"Why? You don't owe him anything! What has he ever done for you that would deserve you giving him any chance whatsoever?!"

She stayed silent for a while. She didn't really have an answer to that, but… she still knew what she wanted to do. After Master Therien took her to the temple, all she did was wonder if she did the right thing by staying. They taught her to help those in need. And she could never understand why her father should be an exception to that.

"I just… I don't wanna see you hurt, love," Bishop sighed and he gently placed his hand on her chin, tilting her head back up to him.

"I need to do this, Bishop. I know that it doesn't make sense to you… but I need to see if… if there's any chance at this turning out… different," she swallowed the knot in her throat loudly. "Maybe… maybe he would tell me what's going on if…" she trailed off again and her brows creased as he gave her a searching look. "If you weren't around."

Bishop's hand dropped from her chin and his brows shot up in shock at her words.

"What are you saying?"

"I just… I think that it would be best if you… left. Just… until I finish this," she lowered her gaze again, staring into the ground stubbornly. She didn't want to see the hurt look in his eyes.

He stood there frozen for a while. That was not an option! Not with everything that was going on. He needed to ensure that she was safe throughout the Rift, that she was sticking away from any potential threat from that bounty. Especially since she still had no idea about it. He couldn't leave her now! Not even for a while.

"Princess… I'll stop. I promise. I won't interfere with this again, but… I'm not leaving you to whatever he may be up to!" he gave her a palpably desperate look.

"Bishop, I can handle myself!" she threw him an incredulous look. She knew that he wanted to watch her back. She wanted to do the same for him, but it wasn't always possible. She wasn't able to do that when he went on his mission in Markarth. This was just like that. Why couldn't he trust her the same way she trusted him?

"I know that! But… we have no idea what you could be getting yourself into here," he looked at her pleadingly. He couldn't tell her his real fears. Certainly not now. But it was still valid. He didn't want to leave her to her father's schemes any more than he wanted to leave her to any potential ambushes by Mercer's people.

"I really don't think it's that serious. Certainly not any more dangerous than your mission in Markarth was. You needed to do that one alone too. I just… need to do this alone. I don't think that he will tell me anything if you're here," she sighed. "Please, Bishop, just… leave this to me. We can split up in the morning. Meet in Ivarstead maybe. It will only be a day after all."

He looked at her desperately again. He was running out of arguments. She was determined to do this alone and nothing was going to deter her.

But he would not leave anything to chance. He would make sure that nothing went wrong, no matter what.

"Fuck… just… be careful, princess. Don't let him dupe you," he sighed in resignation. If this was the way it had to be, so be it. It was not like he didn't have other options.

She gave him a grateful smile and she eagerly pressed her lips to his in a gentle kiss.

"I'll be careful. I promise."

Faldaen returned a few minutes after their talk. He instantly headed towards his pack and began rummaging inside. He looked like he was checking if anything was missing.

He let out a relieved sigh after that and he sat himself down by the fire again. He looked rather more upbeat now than when he had left. Surprisingly refreshed. Aeyrin suspected that some time from Bishop's scrutiny did him some good.

"So… we've been talking and… there's something that we needed to take care of around here," Aeyrin broached the subject promptly. She was already curious about her father's reaction. "Bishop will be leaving us to go on alone towards the warehouse, so that he can… take care of it, in the meantime," she cringed a little when she realized just how vague of an excuse it actually was. Hopefully her father wouldn't question it. She feared that he might do it just to spite Bishop and to give him the same scrutinous treatment that he'd been subjected to.

Her father's eyes went wide as he looked from her to Bishop in pure shock, then back at her.

"Oh. Very well. I'm sure we'll handle ourselves with no trouble, rabbit," then he smiled, even more cheerfully than before. Of course he would. It was no wonder that Bishop was making him uncomfortable. He was apparently more than happy to let the vague explanations slide if it got Bishop away from them in the end.

Bishop's morose expression was even worse now, but he stayed silent. He was adamant to keep from interfering with this again.

The tension still didn't dissipate throughout the rest of the evening, but Aeyrin sorely hoped that tomorrow would be better.

Luckily, they only stayed awake for a little while after their talk. Much to Bishop's disappointment, she insisted on them going to the pond to wash up separately. Although it was better if each of them could keep an eye on Faldaen at the camp, just in case.

When the hour got late, Aeyrin prepared bedrolls for the both of them, earning a grumbling scowl from Bishop.

It didn't matter. It was just one night, after all. She was already so tired of being uncomfortable the entire time, that she really didn't need to add to it.

However, as they all retreated into their respective bedrolls, her father's words proved uncomfortably true. The fire was not enough. It was ridiculous! She had slept alone in her bedroll in Skyrim before and it was tolerable! She couldn't possibly get that dependent on Bishop's body heat. Although… it wasn't the peak of winter back then.

After what felt like hours of torturous cold, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned her head to see the familiar shape in the dark crouching over her and, soon enough, Bishop nudged her to the side as he slipped into her bedroll alongside her adamantly.

"Your chattering teeth are keeping me awake. Get over it," he smirked. The heat of his body enveloped her so pleasantly as he curled himself against her back and as his arm wrapped around her waist snugly.

Alright… it was very helpful.

And she needed the sleep for whatever would come tomorrow.

The anxiety was exhausting enough as it was.