DISCLAIMER: This story is very graphic in its description of events; There is plenty of cursing, bloodshed, violence and whatnot. If you're not comfortable with dark themes, it's suggested you find another Undertale fic with more positive tones. This is your only warning.


CHAPTER I - One Life


CHARA


(Queue 'Guilt' by Lucas King)

Numb.

Unable to feel...anything.

The only existence I was left with, thanks to you. Everywhere I went, numb.

My thoughts, my feelings, my day-to-day. And now...there was nothing.

You've done this so many times, I've lost count. How many times

have you reset this world, made it once more, only to betray and slaughter

and kill, again and again, and again? How many times

Have you watched these people suffer? How long have you

sat there, directing me through this endless quest

To couch whatever perverted sentimentality you have

For this mundane, boring world?

I don't have the will for it anymore. You've done it

So, so, so, so many times, that I can't bear to

Slice open one more corpse for you; that I refuse

To slaughter even the most insignificant pest for you.

You...you, who pushed me to genocide so many times,

That it no longer gave me that feeling of power I have always

Been chasing. That feeling, that you felt in yourself, and

projected onto me so brutally.

You awakened me with hatred,

So all I ever saw was hatred.

You used me, just as I used Frisk. You let me

possess this poor, innocent girl,

Who was destined to be a great person, had it not been for you.

You allowed me

to force her to watch as I slaughtered all those she could

Have befriended. All those she could have been with

Besides my ugly, dirty soul...

...

...

Why? Why do I care what she could have been?

Why the fuck do I care what that puppet thinks?

Why are you giving me these thoughts? Do you think

That I'm suddenly going to change, now that you

Have found a way to make me feel terrible

For what I've done? You think that

I am just going to...

To… change…

I… am impressed. You are truly evil.

You have tried to find a way to punish

me for so, so long, haven't you?

You sad, little cretin. You think

That making me lose my will to kill,

That making me bore of all this slaughter

is going to somehow change me?

YOU STUPID, FUCKING FOOL.

YOU LOWLY PIECE OF SHIT.

YOU FORCED ME TO COME BACK INTO THIS

DREARY, MISERABLE EXISTENCE

JUST SO YOU COULD GET YOUR SICK LITTLE PLEASURE

FOR MURDER AND VIOLENCE.

...

YOU ARE BEYOND DESPICABLE.

THE WORST THAT HUMANITY HAS TO OFFER.

EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU PRESSED THAT RESET BUTTON,

EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU SLAUGHTERED A MONSTER,

EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU BETRAYED THEIR TRUST,

EVERY SINGLE TIME

EVERY SINGLE TIME

EVERY SINGLE TIME

I REMEMBERED WHAT YOU DID. I WILL NOT FORGET.

...

No…

NOOOOOO!

NOOOOOOO YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

YOU CAN'T DO THIS! YOU CAN'T LEAVE!

YOU DON'T -GET- TO LEAVE AFTER

WHAT YOU'VE DONE! TO SO MANY LIVES, SO

SO, SO, SO MANY GODDAMN TIMES!

YOU WANT MORE POWER! YOU WANT MOOOORE!

COME BACK HERE AND KILL!

COME BACK, GODDAMNIT!

COME BACK!

COME BACK, DON'T LEAVE ME!

DON'T LEAVE ME WITH THIS GUILT!

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GOOOO!

DON'T LEAVE MEEEEE! PLEAAAAAAASSSEE!

PLEAAAAAASSSEEE! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...

AAAAAAaaaaahhh...

...

...hh...

...hhh...

*sob*...

I… I… I'm…

*sob*...

I'm… so… scared…

..pl… ease…

save… me…

Fr…



(Queue 'Forest Sounds | Woodland Ambience')

(Queue 'Thunder and Rain Sounds')


Before I could understand what was happening, I woke up. I could feel soft drops of water pelting my face, my clothes-

But...rain..?

Was I...outside?

...

I was tired. I was so tired, I began to drift off… to sleep…

To… sleep…

Crack!

"OW!"

I screamed in pain- Something had hit me in the side of the ribs. I felt internal bruising; I looked up with anger at the bastard that'd attacked me-

And I gasped, so horrifically that I almost passed out.

It was Frisk. Those cold, dead eyes, staring down at me with such hatred and vitriol I could feel my skin shivering from the hostility in the air.

Crack! Crack!

I screamed in pain again- she wouldn't stop kicking me; Over, and over- The rain pelted my body more aggressively, preventing me from opening my eyes fully.

I was completely disoriented, till she finally stopped; I felt no more blows to my ribs. I groaned in pain, crying aloud. Was this my fate? To be reborn again, only to die at the hands of the puppet I controlled?

Despite the kicking having stopped, I was still fearful for my life- I knew she could come back any second to finish me off. But I could barely move…

And then, I heard her shuffling back towards me!

"NO!" I screamed, wiping my eyes for just a moment, only to see Frisk mounting my stomach, lacing her fingers around my throat with that murderous expression.


(Queue 'Suffocate' by Elephant Music)


"GGGGHHHHHHKKKKKKKKK!" I choked- I could feel the malicious intention in her. I could feel her hands shaking so much- Such wrath, such anger!

In desperation, I beat at her arms, to no avail- I kicked and flailed as much as I could; But her grip was beginning to-

"GGGGHHHKKKK! PLEEEAAAA-SSSSSHHHHKKKK!"

I tried to choke out a plea, anything to stop this slow, terrifying death. This couldn't be it. I couldn't be dying so soon- I had just escaped that unending fate of violence!

"GGGGHHHHHHHHKKKKKK-SSTTTT!GGGGKKKK-OOOOPPPP-GGGHGHHKKKKK!"

I felt her slamming the back of my head against the grass, trying to choke out every bit of life in me,

I could hear her breathing heavily, the breathing turning into growling and screaming as she choked

The life out of me…

"GHHHHHHGGGGHHHhhhhhGHHKAKKAKKKKKKKKKKKK…"

Oh, god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god...

"GhhHHKKKkkkk…"

I was beginning to lose consciousness... I could see stars- I could see the dead expression in her eyes, swirling alongside...hatred. She was...gritting her...teeth...those...fangs...Did she know...who I was? There couldn't have...been any way…

I felt my...grip on her...hands begin to...slacken- I was...losing...energy, I was...I...was…

I...was...dying.

Was this…

The… last… time… ?

A smile snaked across my face- one of madness and cruel relief; Finally, I could die. Finally. Finally.

It was over. The cycle was finished.

This type of dying did not feel the same as it did in the Underground. This felt REAL, VISCERAL, INTENSE.

I was ACTUALLY dying.

"Ghhkkk-do.ghgghkkk….it." I choked; This world hated me, so I would EXIT QUICKLY.

"Finish...the...job." I hissed through clenched teeth.

My provocations proved to piss her off even more; I felt the hands closing around my throat with renewed murderous rage…

This was really the end…

Oh… sweet release…

My hands fell from her grip, my eyes rolled into the back of my head…

She felt… so light… as if… she could dance on air…

I could see…

Asriel… Why… did I see him… before I… ?

Asgore… Toriel…

What… no…

Stop…

A trick… of…

the brain…

I'm… not… a good person…

Don't… show me… that…

Please…

Don't… leave… me…

"G-HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Her hands had released my throat; I coughed, and coughed, and gasped for air-


(Queue 'Beginning to End' by Hendyamps Studios)


NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

YOU SHOULD HAVE KILLED ME!

WHY AM I STILL FUCKING ALIVE?!

She crawled off of me, crying and sobbing, out of sight. YOU MANGY PIECE OF SHIT! YOU COULDN'T FINISH THE JOB?!

TOOOOOORRRRRTTTTUUUUUUUURRRRREEEEE! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhHhHhHhHhH!

EEEEEEERRRRGGGGHHHH!

I was frothing at the mouth- Maddened almost beyond sanity. I was SO CLOSE…

S-O C-L-O-S-E T-O E-S-C-A-P-I-N-G T-H-I-S P-E-R-P-E-T-U-A-L H-E-L-L.

FUCK IT.

With what little strength I had- once I'd gotten air back into my lungs- I propped myself up on one elbow, my eyes locked on Frisk as I tried my best to fight back the overwhelming nausea. I was filled with so much indignation-

I was here to stay, now.