Boros the Brave

Disclaimer : All Characters are owned by George RR Martin and HBO. This is a self insert story set during Robert's Rebellion.

Chapter – 1

Boros / SI

Peter woke up suddenly when he heard the howling of wolves and suddenly felt uncomfortable as his bet felt like grass and his back hurt. He opened his eyes but everything was dark around him. He felt himself sweating and tried to get up but felt bloated and unable to move quickly.

The room smelt of shit and piss assaulting his nose. He felt dizzy as he felt like he was having an out of body experience, but everything was so dark he couldn't see a thing. Then he heard voices outside the room and tried to listen where the sound was coming from. He flailed his arms in the dark and slowly moved towards the door.

His head was pounding and his legs bucked as he found it difficult to support his own weight. He panicked and ran towards the door and searched for a knob, he felt the design wrong and instead found a lever which he pulled and then pushed which opened the door.

He ran outside and found himself barreling into a man who was dressed in the garb of a medieval soldier. Then more guards yelled at him and some others wearing yellow and red garbs were pushing towards him.

"Ser Boros is everything allright" asked a man wearing a red dress and a funny looking hemet. 'I am tripping, cousin larry put something in my beer to prank me' he thought as he observed a man gave him a pitcher of water and sat him down.

'What the fuck ? Why are these guys cosplaying and acting like we are in a play' he thought suddenly as he drank the water when he remembered something. "Ser Boros ?" he repeated dumbly and looked at the men clearly now. There were arms of a crowned stag, golden lion and someother sigils he could not identify.

'Am I dreaming or am I cosplaying in some Con' he thought as fear gripped him. He ran puhing the men and ran down the steps of this shitty place and opened the door to outside as people looked at him like he is a fool. With each person he saw dread filled him. He read about stories like these andmade fun of them. He was winded and his body strained from the effort but he went outside pushing a serving women aside.

He was immediately assaulted by the now falling slowly but surely. A chill crept up his spine as he looked around as he shivered and found unwashed and dirty people dressed in little more than tattered rags. There are people with mismatched armor tending their horses. He saw huge sheds with horses resting in them.

"Ser Boros has something happened, had someone attacked you " he heard a soldier approach him. He suddenly noticed that the guys had an accent probably welsh/Irish and replied "Where am I. what is this place ?".

"Ser we are near Castle Cerwyn. His grace and his retinue are in the castle Cerwyn , where as you shared the inn with us since it is ser jamie's shift guarding his grace today. We leave for winterfell come dawn" the man drawled looking at him like he went mad.

'jamie ? Cerwyn ? Winterfell ?' the fuck ?' he panicked as a crowd was now gathering outside looking at him grimly as if he is a madman. 'This is a dream. I am being pranked by larry and the guys' he tried to tell himself though his mind already feared the worst. No. no no'.

"Ser Boros are you ok ? you're shaking ser. Men take him inside his room and get him some cloaks and some wine" a man in lannister livery spoke as men scrambled to help him inside the dirty barn.

Words failed him as he saw drunkards and soldiers alike looking at him as if he had grown another head. 'Fuck this is really happening' he panicked as he was brought to the dark room and tended by some men. They lit candles and brought food and wine for him. He asked them to leave before he looked at the small and bland room.

He went near a mirror and looked at his reflection. "FUUUCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK" he screamed before slapping himself to test his theory. "oh please god don't let it be real" he pleaded when someone knocked on the door.

"Ser Boros ? are you well ser ?" he heard someone ask. "I am allright lads, just old bones" he replied in disbelief hearing his strangely strong accent voice. 'No not him, not the fat guy. Why god why. What did I do to earn this ?' he prayed to any god who would hear.

Peter had seen the series and read all five novels as well as other books from his favourite fantasy series. He even scoured fan fiction and podcasts of all kinds to get his GOT fix till the next books came. Of course he read stories where gods (old & new) or Alien Space Bats (ASB)/ Cosmic Entities bring dead people's souls and resurrect them as Self-insert's mostly Stark/Targaryan wank fest where the overpowered character always changes the fate of people in westeros and helps kill the Night King.

They are fun to read but this is bullshit. He drank one beer and watched a movie before crashing out on his couch. He did not remember seeing any gods/alien creatures getting him here giving him powers or systems to crush hi enemies.' Why… WHY…. He whined as he saw his ugly face with a few grey wisps of hair remaining on his head, a flat nose with jowls. His broad chest and big belly was highlighted by his short, bandy legs.

He was a normal eighteen year old in the real world, an average guy although thin but with sharp facial features and average height. Here though he was fucked , fifty years and a disgrace to the kingsguard, a coward and no one spoke a word favourable about him.

He retched then, emptying all his stomach's contents into the pot which already stank of piss and shit. He thought again 'why god why ? what have I ever done ?'. Any character could have better than this fat fool.

Reality of his situation crashed on him. 'Oh no we are going to winterfell shortly so Jon Arryn is dead, bran will fall, ned goes south, the war , the death and then the white walkers. There is no way in hell I can stop any of it. This is Westeros I will be straight up wrecked either by cersei or by the lannisters.

He went through his options quickly. If I run away I will be killed , can't survive in Essos the dothraki will rip me to pieces, daenerys will never trust me. If I go to the starks with the truth baelish will kill me if I go to kingslanding and help ned varys will kill me and I will be part of the brown in no time. Can't run away to the summer Isles or lys.

Even the wall is fucked as I can't fight for shit. F(A)egon is a no-go, Geoffrey will kill me, Robert will not believe me. Stannis and the red witch will burn me alive though Renly and the tyrells will kill me the minute I am not useful . Dorne is not an option neither are the iron isles.

'Fuck the dangers alone made him light headed – the war, wildlings, dragons , white walkers and Euron. Fuck, fuck ,fuck better to die now than think myself a hero. His house is of the crownlands and not rich enough for him to depend on. Gods there are many worse characters he could have been which are way better than this guy.

Why does he have to be this guy while there are many overweight characters like manderly, illyrio mopatis, mace tyrell, king Robert, samwell tarly or even an obese wildling. He is a dead man now, any kind of weirdness from him will get him killed. He wracked his head for ideas but came up with nothing. This is a world without mercy where only the strong and skilled can survive, not him though.

He read many Self- Insert stories where the insert straght up kills a main villain or makes moves which makes him rich and famous, consolidates power and brings industrial revolution to westeros. Well fuck them , he cannot uplift for shit, should have focused on studies at school. He laughed at his own situation, a fifty year old kingsguard who loves food and the street of silk more than battle.

He remembered boros yielding tommen to Jacelyn Bywater without a fight before the blackwater fight and finally made a food taster for tommen. There is no doubt he is screwed. He has to take a decision – fight or flight and dawn was fast approaching.

NOTE : - A fun short series because nobody else tackles the lesser known characters. Please review and comment.