I have no business posting a new story when I'm still working on another one but I was listening to some music just now and wrote this out in like the last hour. I'll probably explain more in the next chapter.


Chapter 1 – I wanna get stupid, I wanna get dumb.

Thursday morning.

APOV:

"STEELEEEEEEEEE". The sound starts from the bottom of the stairs and continues till I hear it get closer and closer to my bedroom door.

I groan and mutter to myself that it's too fucking early for this shit.

"WAKEUP BUTTERCUP!" she cheerily jumps up and down beside my bed.

I hide my face under the pillow and pray to any divine deity that's listening to mute my beloved best friend's voice. I love her but holy hell she can drive me nuts. I need to take away her key and block her number on my phone. I need to have her deported.

"I am awake and there is no fucking butter in my cup." I groan in frustration and throw the pillow across the room.

"What happened? Date didn't go well last night?" She jumps into the bed and cuddles with me.

"No." He was as interesting as a discarded plastic chair. "I mean isn't it obvious, I'm in my own bed, wearing my college t-shirt... and the batteries in my vibrator died." That pissed me off even more.

"Well, what did you expect Steele... no one gets laid on a Wednesday night."

I roll my eyes. "It was literally hump day and nothing happened. It's been two years I've been at this, Katya... I just want to get this over with."

"How about we put an ad on craigslist?" She muses.

Are you fucking serious? I mean, I know I'm desperate but not that desperate. Or am I?

"I want to actually walk away alive from the experience and not have my head end up in a rando's refrigerator."

"Babe, look... it will happen when it's meant to happen."

Sure, Katya...sure. She believes in fairytales and I don't. Her parents had a shitty short-lived marriage and my parents had a blissful one but somehow we both ended up with opposing beliefs on the subject of love. I'm convinced there's something wrong with me... or maybe I'm just being weird. I wish I had her optimism. Love is something that existed in a simpler time; you know pre-social media where we actually cared about looking into someone's eyes and having a conversation without having to check our phone every two minutes. I'm a nostalgic, I guess.

"I'm not so sure anymore, Katya. I'm exhausted."

Why is it so hard to lose your virginity in this city? I'm not even asking for much. I'm a woman, I have a vagina, I just want to get this over with. All I ask is for some pleasant conversation before we get busy. I've tried it all; Bumble, Tinder, OKcupid, Hinge, Jay date... Christian Mingle for Christ sake... and nothing, nada, ZILCH. I'm decent looking. I'm 5'7. I've got some curves, thanks to my mom's Turkish heritage and I've got long brown hair. My eyes are a little too big and blue but I've got fairly clear skin, thanks to my dad's Irish heritage. I may not be as drop dead gorgeous as best friend Katya, who by the way looks like Gigi Hadid, she's half Turkish and half Russian with light green eyes. She won the gene pool contest out of the two of us... but I'm pretty decent. If Katya is a 10, I'm a solid 7.5... when I've showered and brushed my hair of course.

The tips I get at the diner prove that... but then again, all my best customers are senior citizens and families with cute babies and pet dogs.

I'm definitely going to be #foreveralone.

"Maybe stop focusing on this like it's an item to check off on your to-do list and let it naturally happen. You don't give any of these guys a second chance. You just want to fuck 'em and duck 'em on the first date."

"I don't see what the problem is?"

She lets out a frustrated breath. "Girl... I don't know what to do with you."

"Look Katya, I want to get this out of the way so that I don't die a 40 year old virgin. My first time is going to be tragic any way, with all the pain and shit, I just want to get it over and done with so I can move on to greener pastures."

This shit wouldn't have been a problem if I hadn't been homeschooled. I love my parents but they really messed up... no to mention that one year where I got into that god forsaken prep school on the Upper East Side. Nothing fucks you up like barely surviving the wrath of entitled rich kids. I decided to go to regular public school after that fiasco and it barely helped. College was marginally better but still, the only decent conversations I'm able to have are with people I've either known my entire life or my regular customers at the diner. My customer service persona can only get me so far.

Dates are... well I don't talk much. People say that guys don't talk but let me tell you... guys are talkers. They talk about themselves, the documentaries they've watched and all the shit they've learned from self-help books and twitter fights... and I'm sitting there, nodding my head as I have fascinating conversations with my subconscious to pass the time.

I have nothing remotely interesting to add to these conversations. I mean what the hell am I supposed to say when a guy tells me about the stock market or how the American political system is on the verge of collapse? Bro, I'm just here for my virginity. I'm not looking to get a PhD in how to make my own kombucha or vegan cheese.

I should probably lead with that next time but I still want to maintain the air of mild sophistication that I'm a lady...

"Can you make me breakfast?" Katya pleads batting her eyelashes. I roll my eyes and get ready to do just that.

...

"Father Steele is calling." Katya tells me with her mouth full of pancakes.

"Please don't' make him sound like a priest, that's really weird." I intone and answer the call.

"Steele Sr."

"Steele Jr." he laughs.

"Okay you need to shave. You look 10 years older than you really are."

"Thanks, Annie. I can always count on you to bring me back to earth." He narrows his eyes at me and winks.

"I happen to think it's a good look. It'll help while picking up the ladies." Katya runs over and joins me, wiggling her eyebrows at dad.

"Katya, they let you out again?" Dad jokes. "Also, there aren't any ladies here, except for an elephant named Wanda but we're in a complicated relationship."

"They can't hold me down. I'm a free spirit. Read the memo, Ray... and maybe you should try buying Wanda some peanuts... it might help move the process along" She laughs.

My Dad's is a freelance photographer. He's often on assignment for various news orgs or magazines and he's been recently named ambassador for a popular camera company. These days he's in Kenya, testing out a new camera that's meant to launch in the fall. I'm not jealous. I am no not jealous at all.

Dad was in the Marines and had always been a photography enthusiast. He would often take pictures, just for fun of course till he put together a series about the everyday life of a marine, from getting up at the butt crack of dawn to sleeping at night. Once he retired from service he pitched it to various magazines with the help of his best friend from high school, Jose Rodriguez Sr.,it got picked up by TIME magazine... and he never looked back. He got booked left and right for assignments and he's made a name for himself in the industry.

"By the way, Jose Sr. is going to call you..."

"Did you tell him about my job troubles?" He better not have. Jose Sr. has a good heart but also a mouth that runs like the amazon.

"No, I didn't. He asked if you were working and I said he can call you and ask."

I roll my eyes. J-Ro Sr is a good guy. He's a creative director at one of the major fashion publications and he's asked me to assist him on a few shoots here and there. He's offered to put in a good word with some of the New York based fashion photographers to hire me as an assistant but it's not something I'm comfortable with. I am determined to make it on my own, as much as I can. I've got a decent portfolio and following on social media. My work doesn't really mesh with the usual fashion editorial scene. I like more documentary style work with a little fashion mixed in. I'm still trying to lock down what my style really is and I know I've got a long way to go. The more you shoot the more you know, they say.

Dad and I continue to catch up while Katya helps me clean and put away the dishes. We go over his schedule for the next few weeks and I tell him to give me a final answer on some of the new assignment requests he's gotten. In addition to trying to make a name for myself, I'm also my dad's PA. I manage his everything.

I go through my shoot from last week with a small indie label and go through the process of culling and making final selects to edit and send over to the label's creative director by this evening.

"We need to graduate in our wine choices." Katya muses with her eyes fixed on the TV. "Cheap drug store wine feels like bad juju now."

"If the point is to get drunk, I don't see why it matters." I murmur with my eyes glued to the big monitor in front of me as I continue to edit. "Also, who's going to pay for this fancy ass wine graduation?"

"Ever heard of the seeking arrangement website?"

"Katya... go home you're drunk."

"What? It'll be an experience and I'm bored."

"Your mother is a well known figure in the community and you're also starting to do well in your career. That shit will not go down well."

She huffs in annoyance. That's another thing about Katya... the saying an idle mind is devil's workshop rings loud and true when it comes to her. If she's not busy then her mind goes off the rails and she starts pitching these weird ideas to me.

Two months ago she got signed by a modeling agency and she's starting do book small jobs here and there. She's been my muse since the beginning. I've been photographing her since I could work a camera. Her biggest booking to date was being cast as girl #3 in a nationwide beauty campaign for a new NARS concealer that's launching in two months. Once that launches, my girl's face will be plastered everywhere. I wish my mom were here to see it. The thought makes me a little emotional. I miss her.

"Ana, are you listening?"

"Yeah, sorry... I got lost in this edit. What were you saying?"

"I was going to ask can you please take some outfit pictures of me so I can schedule my posts for the next two weeks?"

"Yeah sure, choose some locations and we'll go and get it done."

I go back to working and little while later my phone rings. It's Jose Sr.

"Jose Sr. to what do I owe this distinct pleasure?" I cheer as I answer.

"Mija... I need a huge favor."

"Does it pay? Don't give me the 'we don't have a budget' spiel. Go sell some of those jimmy choos you guys get for free or the fancy ass clothes in your closet."

"A little..." he laughs.

I take a deep breath. "Okay, what's up?"

"It's actually an emergency. I have a shoot scheduled in two days for our May issue. In addition to that we're creating calendars for Mother's Day to raise money for breast cancer, ovarian cancer and cervical cancer. The photographer we had is sick and unable to fly back form London. Can you do it?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I want you to shoot the feature."

"Why me? , surely you can find a well known and established photographer to do this."

"Because you understand this. The mother and daughter duo you're going to be photographing, well the mother is a breast cancer survivor. I know you'll do it justice Annie."

I feel tears prick my eyes. " J-Ro... "

"Annie, you've got a lot of talent. I think this will be an amazing debut piece for you."

He continues to tell me the premise of the shoot. 20 mother and daughter duo's are being photographed across the United States for this feature. Different photographers have been hired to execute their version of celebrating these women and the bond they have with their daughters. A portion of the magazine sales will go to charity and the supplemental calendar for the next year that will be available for pre-order at the feature launch party. I know exactly how I want to shoot this.

I take a few seconds before I answer.

"Then I want full creative control. Not crazy fashion shit. I want this to be real and I don't need a crew. Minimal equipment and I need a generous site fee to pay the establishment I want shoot in. They're good people and exposure won't pay their bills, I'll waive my own fee for you to pay them if anything."

"No, Annie. I'll pay for both. Send me a quote and I'll get it done."

"Okay, I will. Who am I going to be photographing? Also, no last names. I know they're going to be crazy rich already but just first names to get a feel... otherwise I'll get too nervous and fuck this up."

He breaks in to a boisterous laugh. "Only, you Annie. Only you would walk into a shoot blind. The two women you'll be photographing are Grace and her daughter Mia. They're good people. I've known them for years. Great family and huge in the charity world."

"Grace and Mia." I muse. "Names seem harmless enough... okay. I'll send you confirmation on the location and my quote for later tonight. I'll need a deposit for the site fee by early tomorrow morning though and send over a contract and NDA if need be."

"You got it, Mija. This will be good for you. I know it."

"Thanks for thinking of me, . I won't let you down."

I hang up and stare off into space for a few moments... when I suddenly feel a pair of green eyes too close to my face. Katya tends to do this... I'm a bit of grump and don't like people invading my personal space, I guess I'm a classic New Yorker that way, unless it's her of course. We were born 2 weeks apart; we've been through everything together. Just like our moms did since childhood.

"Boo." It makes me smile a little

"I just got hired by Elle, Katya." I'm trying to keep the emotion out of my voice. I need to remain focused

She gives me a big hug. "You're gonna kill it, Steele."

"It's for breast cancer awareness." I murmur. "I'm also gonna need an assistant on the day of the shoot to help setup and you know... keep me sane and my nerves at bay."

She squeezes my hand and I see tears in her eyes. "I'll be there. I wouldn't miss it for all the good dick in the world."

I roll my eyes and we celebrate by blasting music and dancing around my studio space. This could be my big break.


A/N: Let me know what you think. Next Chapter will have CPOV.

Chapter song: Get Stupid - Bulow