Disclaimer: I own nothing in regard to GWTW
Author's Notes: Thank you for all the reviews and feedback.
Chapter Eleven
A week after Scarlett's arrival from Tara at Thad's two AM feeding, Rhett said, "I couldn't keep a nursemaid. I thought Prissy was useless but at least she never quit on me. Towards the end I stopped even hiring them for I knew Bonnie would run them off."
"Prissy has her faults but she is loyal."
"When Bonnie started peeing in her panties, I didn't know how to get her to stop."
"She just wanted to come home and she was using the only weapons she had."
"When I had to clean her up after she pooped, I didn't think I was going to make it through the entire event. I wanted to throw up so badly."
"I had never changed a diaper at all before Thad was born and right now his poop doesn't smell that bad. I'm not sure I could handle changing Bonnie's poopy diaper."
"I am getting rather good at changing Thad's diapers now."
"He's finished. You can practice one more time."
Rhett did get up and put Thad in his bassinet. He changed his diaper with surprising quickness. He looked over at Scarlett and she was looking at him. More specifically his lower anatomy. He didn't have a stitch of clothing on. He had never felt the need to wear a night shirt. He felt himself responding to her looking at him. He said, "Don't look at me that way or I might not be able to wait the required amount of time. I haven't been with a woman since the night we conceived him."
Scarlett closed her eyes and wisely didn't ask him why. She felt him get back in the bed and he pulled her close. She felt his arousal pressed up against her but that was all Rhett did. After about five minutes Rhett whispered, "I didn't do anything those three days after I forced myself on you. I ran away because I was ashamed of what I had done. Despite appearances I haven't been with anyone else since we said I do."
Scarlett didn't say anything. She pretended to be asleep. She knew that admission had cost Rhett a lot and he was already regretting that he had said it. She wanted him to think she hadn't heard it. When Rhett was his most vulnerable was when he lashed out the most. Yet it warmed her heart that he had said it. She remembered he had told her he loved her that night but in light of his actions afterwards she had not believed him. Maybe he did love her. Maybe she could love him. Maybe they could be happy together.
Those first two weeks were hard on Rhett. He was learning to not interfere when Scarlett or Mammy told Bonnie 'no.' When Bonnie would ask him for something he made himself say, "Let me talk to your mother about it." Rhett did not want that brat that he had created back. In those two weeks Rhett and Scarlett talked more about what was the best way to parent Bonnie than they ever had in the past. Rhett even said, "It appears you are a much better parent than I ever gave you credit for."
Scarlett replied, "You would be a better parent if you weren't so indulgent."
"You are right, and I am trying awfully hard to say no and not countermand any of your orders."
"I know. I can tell. Thank you."
They had started compromising on their parenting styles. Scarlett knew she was too strict because she wanted her child to be perfect. Rhett knew he was too lax because he wanted to give his children everything. Scarlett was learning to play, and she was letting her children be children. Rhett was learning that his children hearing the word no was not a bad thing but actually a good thing.
When the girls' dresses arrived from the dressmaker, Scarlett looked at them and smiled. They were made from the same pattern, but the material was different. The material was similar. It was flowers on a solid background. Bonnie's dress had a blue background and Ella's dress had a green background. Scarlett knew that was Rhett's doing for she knew her eldest daughter always wanted to please people and would usually just go along with Bonnie.
Yet Ella had her moments of stubbornness. Scarlett had been pleased when she had heard Ella telling Bonnie they couldn't do something because it was against the rules. She had been even more pleased when Bonnie had listened to her sister.
One afternoon while Scarlett nursed Thad she was sitting in the big chair in their room. She smiled. It had been so long since it had been their room. She had been so foolish. Her feelings for Ashley had been mostly fantasy and most of her feelings had been caught up in the fact he still saw her as sweet and kind. It was beside the point that she had never been sweet or kind. What had Ashley said about her that day in the library about wanting it all. Yes, she would want all of her spouse, his heart, his soul, and his mind. So would Rhett.
She smiled as she thought, 'I wish Rhett were here to entertain me. I miss him when he's not with me.' Scarlett refused to let herself think any deeper about the subject.
When the day arrived that they could resume their marital relations, Rhett was anxious and excited. He wanted to be intimate with Scarlett so badly. He wanted to share those special moments. Those moments that he had shared with so many women in his life but now meant nothing. Nothing compared to being intimate with his wife. Those women had been a physical release. It was so wonderful when he was inside Scarlett, and she made those sweet sounds. Would she make them again? He didn't think that he could handle it if she was just doing her duty like she had before Bonnie was born. He didn't want her to accept him, he wanted her to want him as much as he wanted her. Just like she had that night. He didn't remember very much about that night except she had really wanted him. He thought he had told her he loved her, but she wasn't acting like he had said it. Had he been running away from her for the last year over nothing?
That night as Scarlett was getting ready for bed, Rhett said, "Can we resume our marital relations?"
"Yes, we can."
Rhett got in the bed and leaned over and kissed Scarlett. Their relations were good. Scarlett was welcoming and with him the entire time. He gave her all of him. It was good. It was relaxed. He didn't feel loved exactly, but he did feel wanted. He did practice a form of pregnancy prevention. As he pulled her close, he said, "When Thad is one, we will talk about if we want to have another one."
"That sounds nice. Right now, I don't think I want any more, but I also don't want to go back to separate bedrooms. I missed you."
In a rare moment of honesty Rhett said, "I missed you, too."
"Tell me a story."
Rhett lit a cigar and started telling Scarlett a story. Soon he knew she was asleep. He put out his cigar and pulled Scarlett to him. He was quickly asleep also.
He woke up when he heard Thad crying. Scarlett quickly was awake and had picked Thad up. She quickly had her breast out and he just as quickly had latched on. She laid back and closed her eyes. Rhett picked up the Jules Verne novel he had on his nightside table. He started reading the book to Scarlett. When he started, she opened her eyes and smiled at him. She soon closed her eyes, but Rhett could tell she was listening. She opened her eyes when she switched Thad to the other breast. After a while Thad was finished. Rhett put a bookmark in the novel and laid it on his nightside table. He said, "To be continued tomorrow night." He took his son from Scarlett. He changed his diaper which Thad slept through. When he was finished Rhett thought, 'I'm getting good at this.' He thought, 'I guess this is how parents work together.' When Rhett got back in the bed Scarlett tentatively kissed him which thrilled him. It thrilled him that she wanted him. He was certainly going to accommodate her.
The next day Rhett found Scarlett in the kitchen talking to the cook. It appeared they were discussing the menu for the next week. He said, "May I hold my son for a few minutes?"
"Alright."
After she had handed the baby over Rhett said, "You need to get ready to go out."
"Why?"
"We are going to go look for a new house."
"Alright."
"We need at least five bedrooms."
"Alright."
"Come on and get changed."
"No, in about ten to fifteen minutes Thad is going to need to be fed. I will get dressed to go out after that."
Rhett smiled and said, "Yes, we must maintain Thad's feeding schedule. Let me escort you to our bedroom."
After Thad was satisfied and asleep again, Rhett helped Scarlett get dressed. She made him tighten up her corset as tight as he could get it. Rhett was motivated to get it very tight. He didn't want her gaining another inch in her waist. When he was done, she said, "You are going to have to loosen my corset up. I can't breathe."
After he had loosened it up, she said, "I meant it that day we talked. There are worse things than having a baby every year."
"I'm glad you feel that way, but I don't want to have another for at least a year. I want to enjoy your body baby-free for a year."
Scarlett blushed but his words pleased her.
The couple left the house. Scarlett took Rhett's arm as they walked to their new buggy. Their relationship was moving into the comfortableness they had when she was married to Frank, that of good friends.
Rhett made himself be happy with it. Yet he couldn't stop himself from hoping it would develop into something more.
Scarlett was happy with their relationship also. She had her best friend back, yet she too was hoping it would develop into something more.
They talked about what they wanted in their house. If Rhett would say, "I don't care."
Scarlett would laugh and say, "Yes, you do. I don't want to listen to you complain."
Rhett would smile and give her his opinion. He still wanted to give her everything she wanted but he knew this was a marriage. He knew now that marriage was sharing and compromise. She wanted to live close enough to Miss Melly to walk to her house which really meant for Miss Melly to walk to her house for Scarlett didn't walk anywhere.
They looked at several houses. They were either two plain for Scarlett or too ornate for Rhett. They finally compromised on a Victorian style home.
They found one with six bedrooms and the servants' quarters on the third floor. They like the lay out of the downstairs. They decided to get a piano and Scarlett would give Ella lessons and a guitar and Rhett would give Wade lessons.
Scarlett went to the Pickerton Agency by herself. She didn't want to tell Rhett anything about her time at the finishing school. She especially didn't want to tell him she had been bullied. It made her feel like a weak person, and she wasn't weak. Scarlett asked the detective to find an Abagail Newman. They agreed and told her they would get back to her in a month. The Pickerton Agency reported back to her on Abagail Newman. She had never married. She had died shortly after the war was over, probably from starvation. Scarlett was disappointed. She had wanted the bully to suffer a lot more for all the pain she had inflicted on Scarlett at La Fayette Academy. She had wanted her face to have been scarred and mutilated. She wanted the woman to be a whore on skid row. Scarlett knew she had to be satisfied with the fact that Abagail had starved to death. She knew that would be a horrible way to die.
