( So last week I had two story ideas in my head. Wasn't sure which one I wanted to do next so I decided I am going to ping pong each week. One Week you'll get The Surrogate the next Week Poke Her Night. I have to confess the idea for this story came from guilt. When I was writing Body Switch I had a Reviewer ask me not to break up Faith and Xander. I even had one suggest Faith Buffy Xander. I felt bad that I was breaking them up and I decided I wanted to write something to make it up to them. So this is my something. Both Pieces I'm writing now aren't going to be nearly as long and drawn out. God I think I just passed chapter 60 or something on body switch. Deff didn't' see that going that far. Anyways my idea is no more than 10 chapters at the most 13. I think I can do this. As always Reviews are appreciated.)

Faith knocked on Buffy's front door before letting herself in. "Hello hello. Your favorite slayer is here"

Buffy stuck her head out from the bedroom as she brushed out her hair. "Hey I'm almost ready to go."

Faith sauntered over to Buffy's room. She couldn't help but notice the jeans Buffy wore looked like they were painted on. The T shirt was from a bar they visited last Summer in the Midwest. "Someone is pulling out the big guns."

Buffy looked in the mirror working her make up. "Just want to look nice."

Faith rolled her eyes. "So you going to tell me it has nothing to do with Spike and Angel being back."

"I am happy to see my old friends doesn't' have to mean anything more than that."

It wasn't' that Faith had anything against either of them but it annoyed her that Buffy couldn't see she was so much more than just those two. She was this amazing incredible force of nature and any man in the universe would be lucky to have her attention yet she still held this place for them that at least to Faith she wasn't sure they deserved. "So who is going to get lucky tonight?"

Buffy smirked coyly. "There was a time when that question would have been obvious. Since Angel has tethered his soul to his body once and for all."

Faith raised an eyebrow. "That puts him back in play?"

Buffy sighed. "Do you know how long it has been Faith since someone has gained access to Buffy's bedroom?"

"I get it Buffy. I am going to tell you though that is on you."

"Always got to blame me. I swear I think you are just a contrarian."

"I'm going to say this and than I am done on it. You are the one who puts so much priority on work. There is plenty of viable choices of walking dicks around the school that you could mount."

She sighed, "I know and you aren't wrong. I need to realize and own that not every time you have sex it has to be about a deep emotional connection."

"So you are saying tonight some one is going to."

Buffy didn't want to answer the question so she cut her off and changed the subject. "Did you talk to Xander? Do we need to bring anything?"

Faith shook her head. "Help chip in for pizza and beer."

"That is fair."

"Oh and he got on this rant about helping with clean up after."

"Again fair."

Buffy stood up and looked herself over in the mirror. "You know a few months ago I thought Xander was silly for wanting start poker nights but I have to be honest I've gotten to this place where I look forward to them."

"It is nice to have these nights where we can just relax and it's not about monsters or vampires. It is just old friends catching up."

"You are saying that because when I take your money tonight you have an excuse."

"How the hell did you convince Xander to let Angel and Spike play?"

Buffy went to her dresser drawer and pulled an old Crown Royale bag. It was half filled with change and bills. It was what she had called her poker pouch. "You know Xander has grown and matured a lot."

"No he hasn't."

"Look he still doesn't like them but he can tolerate them.."

"The flip side of that goes both Angel and Spike showing up knowing how they feel about him. Than again if the great White Beauty known as Buffy shows up."

"Stop it."

"They just couldn't stay away."

Buffy threw her a half smile. "Did you remember your money?"

Faith nodded "It is in the car. Can we go already?"

"Yeah yeah I am on my way."

Xander's house was the definition of the term fixer upper when he bought it but in the 3 years since than it had come a long way. As Willow walked in the front door she carried a bottle of white wine with her. In her other hand was a small bewitched lunch box. "Since not all of us drink Coors light I'm putting my wine in the fridge."

Xander just laughed. "You wound me Willow. What kind of host would I be if I didn't provide for all my guests?"

"You have wine?"

Xander nodding "It is in the fridge."

Willow opened the fridge to find Xander's Box o wine and she laughed. She had to give an A for at least trying. "Very kind Xander but I think I'll stick with my stuff."

Andrew was the next to arrive wearing his fanny pack around his waist. Willow was already chewing on a piece of pizza. "Is Dawn going to be coming tonight?"

Xander cracked open a beer and grabbed a slice of pepperoni. "She has finals.. So probably not."

Just than there was a ring of the doorbell. "That must be Spike and Angel."

Andrew asked curiously. "How do you know that?"

Xander walked to the door. "Buffy and Faith wouldn't knock and Angel and Spike can't come in." He opened the door "Cause they havne't been invited in." He smiled at them.

Angel laughed seeing him. "Good to see you too Xander."

Spike interjected. "But technically the invitation to play poker is enough to physically come inside so stop being a wanker and get out of the door way."

Xander stepped aside. "Just busting chops. You know for old times." He stepped aside. "Please come inside."

Angel looked around the house inspecting it. "You have a nice house."

As they stepped inside Xander closed the door behind them. "Thank you. It was what you call a fixer upper."

Spike slapped him on the back. "Well so were you but I like to think we put the time in and."

Xander just smirked. "Oh it is good to have you guys back."

Angel just laughed this time. "Oh that had to be hard to say."

Xander nodded. "So the pizza is on the table and beer is in the fridge. Hope you guys brought some money to play with."

Before they could respond the front door opened as Faith came in. "Where is the beer and pizza."

Angel smiled at her. "Really? You haven't seen us in almost 2 years and it's where is the beer?"

Spike nodded. "Actually it was beer and pizza."

Faith turned to them and put on a fake smile. "Angel" she stepped to him and hugged him. "And Spike" She hugged him. "So good to have you both back." She looked at Xander. "Where is the beer and pizza?"

Xander just laughed. "Pizza is on the coffee table and beer in the fridge."

As Buffy walked in she just smiled. "There are my boys." Buffy opened her arms for a hug. Angel stepped to her holding her close.

He savored the moment holding her. "God I've missed you."

Spike rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah stop hogging the slayer." Buffy stepped to him hugged him. Spike in turn just enjoyed having her that close.

Buffy stepped back. "I really am glad to see you two."

Angel nodded. "Well we have so much to catch up on."

Xander interrupted "And we can do that but in the mean time get some pizza and a beer and lets get the game started."

Buffy laughed and reached in to her pocket "Hey will 15 do it for the pizza and beer?"

Angel looked on confused. "Xander is charging you for food?"

Xander rolled his eyes. "The way we do this is we all chip in a little that way no one gets stuck with the bill for food and beer."

Angel put his hands up. "Buffy put your money away. Tonight the meal is on me." He pulled out his wallet. "Xander 100 should cover everything?"

Xander snapped the bill out of his hand. "Hey you want to be big man who am I to stop you." It was obvious to Xander what Angel was doing but he was beyond playing the stupid game and if Angel wanted to swing his dick around via his wallet he wasn't going to stop him.

Spike muttered. "Way to be subtle."

As everyone took there seat Spike looked around the table. "What is with the cigar box and lunch box." Xander opened an old cookie tin. It had money in it. "We all have our own poker box."

Angel laughed. "So you guys take this pretty serious?"

Faith put her cigar box on the table. "We are pretty laid back but Xander's poker nights have gotten pretty popular."

Spike looked a little surprised. "Who else plays?"

Andrew put his fanny pack on the table getting in to his change. "Giles hardly ever misses a game but he is currently in England. Dawn likes playing when she is in town."

Faith nodded leaning back. "We try not to bring in too many other slayers. This is usually a invite only thing but we occasionally let one or two in."

As Xander took out the deck starting to shuffle. Spike pulled out his money. "So what are we playing?"

Xander started dealing out cards. "Dealers choice. First Jack picks the game."

Angel asked, "Any limits?"

Xander shrugged "Don't really have a limit. We generally keep the game friendly. We aren't high stakes. Mostly quarter anti and stuff like that."

Angel pulled out his wad of cash. "Can someone make change? All I have is big bills."

Spike pulled out his own money "Mines bigger."

Faith shook her head grumbling. "Dumbass." She whispered under her breath.

Angel looked at her "What?"

Faith just smiled. "I was just saying I did pretty good last time. I can make change for you."

Spike smiled. "What about me?"

Xander took the bill from Spike. "I got you covered. Yeash you guys ever thought of coming prepared."

As Xander made change he went back to dealing. Willow got the first Jack. Xander passed the deck to her asking "So what are we play first?"

Willow took the deck shuffling. "I'm feeling a little 7 card no peak."

Angel looked confused. "No peak?"

Spike nudged him. "You'll pick it up."

Buffy stood up. "Deal me in I need another beer."

Faith looked at Spike. "I Know it doesn't need to be said but kittens are not currency at the table."

Spike just smiled at her "I'll keep that in mind love."

Buffy sat back down opening the beer. "Alright lets play some cards."

It had only been an hour in to the game and Angel had brought up how he was responsible for taking down the demon master of the underworld. Not to be out done Spike had to mention how he defeated the vampire syndicate and Vampire king of New York stopping the apocalypse

Just as Angel was about to start the story of how he was responsible for bringing Wolfram and Hart to there knees Xander breathed out bored deep sigh. Angel stopped and looked at him. "Sorry am I boring you?"

Xander stood up going to the fridge to get another beer. "Hey I get it. You guys are hero's and champions and wow you've saved the world. "

Buffy saw him open the fridge. "Harris BEER ME."

Xander grabbed another bringing it back. "Real quick poll of the room. If you have saved the world do me a quick favor and put your hand in the air."

Literally every person at the table raised their hand. Angel looked at Andrew. "You saved the world?"

Xander stepped to him patting him on the back. "Crazy story. There was a demon who was 2 minutes away from sending out a code over the internet that would have basically shut down the brain of anyone who was online."

Andrew blushed. "It is more complicated."

Willow smiled at him. "He out hacked the demon and shut it down. It was quite impressive."

Xander cracked open the beer and sat back down. "The point is we come here to escape the talk of vampires and demons. So why don't you save your dick measuring contest for any other time."

Faith smacked her hands together. "Dick measuring contest? Now that is a concept I can get behind."

Buffy nodded. "I like that game."

Xander took the deck of cards and laughed. "Andrew time to pick your game."

As the night went on both Spike and Angel were doing exceptionally well at the games. If Spike hadn't won than Angel did. Buffy wanting to relax kept putting away beer after beer after beer. Xander sucked in a breath looking at his cookie jar that was now much lighter. Faith's cigar box was practically empty.

Faith made a face. "I think I regret you two getting invited."

Spike smirked. "Hey don't be a poor sport. I'm a vampire. We have a lot of down time while the sun is up."

Angel nodded. "He isn't wrong. Can't go out in the sun. We have a lot of day to fill. Have to find something to do."

Angel pulled out a 100 dollar bill once again trying to be the big man at the table. "Hey Faith no hard feelings. You can refill your box."

Faith snapped the bill out of his hand. "I know I should look at this as condescending but I just don't care."

Xander took the deck of card ready to deal. "Well guys as much fun as this is I think it's time we call it a night."

Spike whined. "Aw come on it's barely midnight."

Angel pulled out his cash. "If it is about the money."

Xander put his hands up. "Guys. You won be proud. We had fun and to be honest it wasn't the worst thing in the world reconnecting with you."

Angel fired back. "Oh come on. Don't take your ball and go home."

Buffy laughed drunk. "He is home Angel."

Xander started picking up the empty pizza boxes. "I'm just saying we call it a night. You did good. Walk away with some coin in your pocket."

Spike just smirked "Sounds like sore loser talk."

Before Xander could say anything. Faith cut him off. "I propose one last bet for the night. Something really high stakes."

Angel turned to Faith looking at her. "High Stakes?"

Willow laughed "I've lost enough tonight. I am out."

Spike leaned forward. "What are these stakes?"

Faith stood up sauntering. "Well money is easy and to be honest it's just. Well what I'm talking about money can't buy."

Angel smirked at her. "I'm listening."

Faith sauntered behind Buffy putting her hands on her shoulders. "Now I happen to know for a fact Buffy is in the need for something. You guys know what it is? I'll give you a clue. It starts with D and ends with a K. It's not Duck."

Buffy raised her hands up. "Is it dick?" She laughed.

Faith rubbed Buffy's shoulders. "Atta girl." She looked to the table. "Before we got here Buffy was telling me how much she wanted to get laid. She said tonight was the night."

Angel looked at her. "Not sure what you are getting at."

Faith smirked . "One last game where she is the prize."

Spike unable to blink. "You are kidding right."

Xander rolled his eyes "Faith she is drunk."

Buffy cried out "BOOOO I wanna be the prize."

Faith shrugged. "Yes she is drunk but she had plans on taking someone home tonight. I say we just make it more interesting

Angel refused to make eye contact. "So what's the game? Is it Hold Em or Draw Poker, Oklahoma?"

Faith picked up the deck of cards. "Oh this game is much too good to leave to the hands of fate. We put the cards away."

Spike confused asked. "Than how do we win?"

Xander started picking up the dishes cleaning up the house. Faith moved right along. "There was something Xander said tonight that I think sounded like way too much fun."

Xander stopped and put the pizza boxes in the trash. "What did I say?"

Faith did her best Xander impression. "This isn't a dick measuring contest." Faith just snickered. "But what if it was? I mean who would win?"

Willow snorted laughing. "Oh sorry that is just kind of funny."

Buffy's eyes went wide with fascination. "Oh YES. Let's do a dick measuring contest."

Faith shrugged "The only problem is if we are being fair. I mean Willow can't go after the prize."

Willow put her hands up. "Not interested."

Andrew followed her tone. "I am with Willow but Buffy wouldn't exactly be my first choice at the table."

Faith pointed and nodded. "Okay so 2nd place can get Andrew." She turned back standing behind Buffy. "So I guess it's just you 3."

Xander looked at her surprised. "What? Me? I'm" He shook his head. "No."

Angel looked at Spike. "The idea of this bet is revolting but I'm not going to let Spike win because he is the only one in. So I guess I'm in."

Spike just smirked. "Angel you already lost. Just bow your head in defeat and walk away."

Faith looked at Xander and whined. "You gotta be in this. Come on."

Xander shook his head. "Buffy is drunk and even if she said."

Spike cut him off. "Oh come on now. Don't make excuses. It is completely fine to admit defeat. You know you lost before you already started. No Shame in accepting defeat."

Angel just laughed. "Oh be nice to him. This is his house." The words were so condescending.

Xander turned his back walking in to the kitchen to do the dishes. Faith called out. "We will raise the stakes."

Xander kept cleaning. "The only stakes I want to raise I'm bringing down on a certain pair of vampires."

Faith ignored the comment. "Let's keep this competitive. Here is the offer. We get 3 people making the bet." She looked to Spike and Angel seductively. "I'll put myself on the table."

Spike stammered "You mean."

Faith didn't let him finish. "I mean. You aren't just playing for Buffy. You are playing for Buffy and Me."

There was a silence that hung in the room for a second till Angel spoke up. "Buffy you are okay with this."

She just shrugged. "Game on."

Faith called out to the kitchen. "So now Xander. You still saying no."

Xander stepped out walking to the table and smiled. "I sure am Faith."

Spike interjected. "Fine it will be me and Angel. Winner still gets"

Faith shook her head and shrugged. "Nope. You want the 3 way than I want 3 people."

Xander shrugged. "I guess you are just playing for Buffy than."

Spike stood up. "Don't be a wanker. We don't care how small you are."

Angel looked at the money in front of him. "How about I raise the stakes." He pushed all the money he had won in to the center of the pot. "And to sweeten the deal." He reached in to his pocket and counted out five 100 dollar bills. He threw it on the poker winnings. "Call it a side pot."

Spike not to be out done pushed in his winnings and threw in all his money. "And I'll match it."

Andrew looked stunned. "Wow. Talk about an all in moment."

Xander looked at them. "Guys It was fun."

Spike angry wanting to win the prize. "Harris stop being a wanker and grow a pair."

Xander closed his eyes and shook his head. He was pissed. It was his house and they were still treating him like they had no respect.

Angel was his usual condescending himself. "Look it is fine. Spike lets take a step back. Xander you don't have to do it. It's fine. There is no shame in just saying."

Xander shook his head. "You know what. Fuck it. You guys want this. Fine I'm in."

Buffy threw her arms up. "Yay Xander is going to play."

Spike drummed his hands on the table. "Now we got a game."

Willow raised her hand. "Silly question but this is my first dick measuring contest. Shouldn't we establish some rules."

Faith spun around pointing to Willow. "Good point Rosenberg. Let's make some rules."

Xander sat down back at the table. "No magic or charms or other worldly powers. You only get to use the dick that God gave you."

Angel nodded and smiled. "Xander being a vampire gives you certain strengths and abilities but having a big dick isn't really one of them."

Spike nodded. "He is right. I was born with mine.

Buffy asked. "Are we measuring hard or soft?"

Faith answered with out hesitation. "Good question. I think we measure with the best cock you can present. Harden that bitch to get every inch you can,."

Angel ran his hands down his face. "Is this really happening?"

Willow ignored him. "What is a winner? Are you going by length or girth?"

Andrew answered this time. "The fair thing would be to get both measurements and than factor them in to get the healthy average."

Faith nodded at him. "That is some thinking Andrew."

Spike laughed. "Who does the measuring?"

Andrew raised his hand as Angel, Spike and Xander all in unison said "NO"

Faith stood up. "I'd offer to do it but the whole bet was my idea and I want someone totally impartial Also it someone with no previous cockular knowledge."

Angel looked at her confused. "Cockular isn't a word."

Faith kept going. "Which means it couldn't be Buffy and because of my past with Xander it can't be me." She worked her way standing behind Willow drumming her fingers over her shoulder. "Who could do it?"

Willow just rolled her eyes. "Really? So the lesbian is going to do the penis measuring? You know what. Why not? I mean it will make a hell of a story some day." She stood up. "Xander measuring tape?"

He pointed to the kitchen. "Junk drawer on the first cabinet in the kitchen."

Spike tossed back the last of his beer. "How do we decide who goes first?"

Buffy blurted out. "Alphabetical order."

Faith pointed to them "Okay Angel you are first Spike you are second Xander you got last."

Angel put his hands up. "You do know my name is Liam not Angel"

Faith rolled her eyes calling out the exact same order. "Okay Liam you are first with William coming up 2nd and Xander you are last."

Angel made a face not happy. "Technically Xander is Alexander which would mean."

Spike whined. "Quit your damn bitching and get measured already."

Angel opened his mouth to object. "Fine. Not that it matters. I mean if I am first or 3rd I still am going to win."

Willow came back with a roll of measuring tape the soft kind a seamstress would use. "Well since things aren't awkward enough let me say something I thought I'd never say. Angel drop your pants and lets see what you got."

With out hesitation Angel pulled at his belt and dropped his pants. His cock switch bladed up as Andrew let out a slight gasp. Will took the tape measuring the length first. "Alright Angel is coming in at 7 and one quarter inches long and 4 and around."

Spike laughed rolling his own tongue in his mouth. "You just lost Angel."

Angel quickly pulled up his pants. "I wouldn't be so sure."

Spike sauntered over as Angel took his seat back. He looked at Willow. "Ready to see your winner."

Willow yawned. "Just get it over with."

With that Spike unbuttoned his pants and his hard cock was ready to go. Willow took the measurement refusing to look him in the eye. "Okay Spike is 7 and 3/4ths long."

He laughed "That beats your 7"

Angel barked "7 and a quarter."

Willow interrupted. "But your 3 and a half inches around."

Angel laughed "I am wider."

Faith called them out. "Yeah yeah. Take your seat."

Buffy called out. "Xander is up next." She thought she was whispering but said it loudly. "I always wondered what Xander's cock looked like."

Xander rolled his eyes and stepped forward. He looked at Willow. "Didn't see this night going this way."

Willow just smiled. "Hey if this was high school it would be quite the thrill."

Xander gave one quick tug at his waist band and reached in his pants. What happened next was a stunned silence all through out the room as they stared on at what could only be considered porn star length.

Finally breaking the silence was Faith with her laughing. . "Ta Da."

Willow looked at both Spike and Angel. "I mean I can measure it but I'm just saying. I'm pretty sure he gots you.. I mean both of you."

Spike nodding. "Yes Yes measure. That isn't It's an optical illusion or proper shading."

Buffy leaned forward stunned. "Holy Fuck. I mean WOW."

Willow nodded not knowing what to do as she took the measurement. "Alright from the length we have a solid 10 inches and around the tree trunk we got."5 and half inches."

Faith just clapped. "Don't have to factor up those averages to know who won."

Spike shook his head pointing at his dick. "He cheated. That had to be some kind of vengeance demon enhancement from Anya."

Faith shook her head. "Oh no. That is 100 percent Xander Harris. As the first lucky lady to take it for a ride I can verify that is 100 percent natural God given."

Angel stood up shaking his head. "Cheat. That is a cheat."

Faith looked at him scowling. "How am I cheating?"

Angel pointed at Xander as he pulled his cock in zipping up. "You knew what he had before this bet took place."

Buffy stood up drunk. "Hey that's not fair. I knew what both of you had."

Faith nodded. "Girl makes a point."

Andrew mumbled. "It's a good point but not as good as Xander's point."

Faith laughed. "And by point he's talking about his co"

Xander cut her off. "Who's the sore loser now?"

Buffy looked at Xander. "Ya know I didn't see this night going this way but I'm drunk and hey stranger things have happened."

Spike stammered. "Buffy you aren't for real."

Xander flashed them both a big smile. He opened his cookie jar and started putting all of the money in it. "Well guys it's late and I think it's time we call it a night."

Willow stood up. "Okay since I've touched more penises tonight than I have in the last 10 years I'm going to get out of here before things get really weird."

Andrew stood up. "Yeah me too. For the record in this contest there are really no losers and all of you."

Willow pulled him along the door with her. "Come on Andrew."

Angel looked at Buffy. "This was a silly bet. You aren't really going to."

Faith grabbed Spike and Angel by the arm leading them to the door. "And you lost the bet so we will see you in the morning."

Spike looked at her. "Faith."

She shoved them out the door. "Good night."

Xander had since gone back to cleaning. Faith came to him. "Screw cleaning up we can do it in the morning."

Buffy came up behind him and slapped his ass. "Come on stud. We going to do this."

Xander turned "Stop." He stepped back "And for the record. No we are not."

Faith looked like she was going to explode. "What?"

Xander pulled himself up to the counter sitting. "Spike and Angel were both dicks and I'll be damned if I was going to let them take advantage of drunk Buffy."

Faith nodded. "And you didn't that is good. So claim your prize."

Buffy nodded. "Buffy want sex"

Xander just shook his head. "And if I take advantage of drunk Buffy than I'm not better than they are."

Buffy looked angry. "Hey I am drunk and I will own that but."

Xander laughed. "But?"

Buffy thought about her words. "Faith was right and I wanted to have sex tonight. So lets do this. If I was sober right now I would make the same choice."

Faith nodded. "Yeah what about me. I am sober and I want sex."

Xander put his hands up. "Okay it is compromise time."

Faith looked to him skeptically. "What sort of compromise?"

Xander picked up a dish towel and started cleaning. "Buffy sobers up tomorrow and once she is clear headed and back to her old self. If that Buffy wants to do this poker earned 3 way. I am on board"

Buffy stomped her feet. "That's not fair. I mean if you won't do it maybe I'll find second place."

Xander crossed his arms. "That's my offer take it or leave it."

Faith locked eyes with him knowing he wouldn't be backing down. She nodded. "Take it."

Buffy moved to the couch lying down. "Well I'm not leaving till I get some sex."

Faith went to Buffy whispering. "Just lay here and I'm going to get you that sex."

Xander went back to cleaning. "I've made up my mind."

Faith picked up a dishtowel. "I know. I'm helping you with clean up."

Faith helped Xander to get his house back in order. She threw away the beer cans and wiping up the mess. By the time everything was done and back to normal Xander yawned. "It's been a long night."

A low dull snore could be heard coming from the living room. Faith stood over the couch watching Buffy sleep. "Should we wake her and get her home?"

Xander grabbed a blanket and pulled it over her. "Let her sleep it off here."

Faith yawned. "If she is staying. So am I?"

Xander let out a deep sigh. He scooped Buffy up and carried her to his bed. Gently he laid her under the covers. "Okay." The bed was king size so there was enough room. He looked at Faith. "You two can sleep in here and I'll take the couch."

Faith whispered. "There is enough room for all of"

"I'll take the couch."

Knowing she wasn't going to change his mind she smiled. "Good night Xander."

"Faith."

"Yes?"
"See you in the morning."