This is Book 2 of the Rachel Snow series. I strongly suggest you read Book 1 (Swiftly Falling Snow) first.
Content Notes: Sexual assault. Past child abuse and neglect (discussed), past sexual abuse (discussed).
A special thanks to my beta reader EmeraldSnakes who has spent the past four months surviving me talking about this fic nonstop and has graciously edited this fic.
This fic updates on Saturdays and is cross-posted on AO3.
Rachel and Professor Snape flooed to Spinner's End at the end of June.
She had spent the previous week enjoying the library and the Quidditch pitch while she still had access to them, while Professor Snape inventoried and ordered supplies and finished putting together grade reports for the students in his House.
As usual, Rachel stumbled out of the floo and landed on her hands and knees. She had no idea how Professor Snape - and everyone else she'd seen use the floo - simply stepped out of the fireplace. The sitting room was filled with wall-to-wall bookcases, and had an armchair and a sofa. Not too much light came in through the windows.
She was just getting to her feet when Professor Snape stepped through the floo. He looked around the room with sharp movements, as if he was just seeing it for the first time.
"I'll show you the rest of the house," he said after a moment.
Rachel followed him into the kitchen and was a little surprised to see muggle appliances. There was a fridge that looked quite old fashioned, along with a gas-burner stove, and a sink built into a laminate countertop that was peeling on one end. On the other side of the narrow kitchen there was a table just big enough to sit two people.
"There's a pantry through there," Professor Snape said, pointing to a door at the far side of the kitchen. "And a yard out back, though it's not cultivated."
Rachel placed her hand on the countertop and pushed herself up onto her toes to peer out the window. The yard was rough and full of weeds. Aunt Petunia would have had a heart attack just looking at it.
"I'll show you your room, upstairs," he said, leading her back through the kitchen and the sitting room and then up a narrow flight of stairs. There were three doors in the hallway. "That's my room, that's the toilet and shower, and then this will be your room."
She followed him into a small bedroom. There was a wooden wardrobe, a desk with a chair, and a bed that was neatly made with a grey blanket. The window looked out on the street and there was another row of brick houses just across. She watched as he put her trunk at the foot of the bed and unshrank it.
"I know it's not much, but we'll go to Flourish and Blotts in a few days and you can pick out some new books," Professor Snape offered. "I can't let you roam Cokeworth on your own either, it's not safe."
Rachel reached into her pocket for one of the scraps of parchment she'd taken to keeping there and her quill. She went to the desk and began to write. 'It's just fine. Besides, I have my own bedroom, which is nice. Can I read the books on the bookshelves downstairs?'
Professor Snape read the piece of parchment she handed him. "You may, though you may not find many of them to be interesting. They're mostly advanced books on potion brewing. I'll let you get settled in and then we'll go down to the shop and pick up a few things to eat."
Rachel nodded and watched as Professor Snape left. She could hear his footsteps on the stairs and she thought that would serve as a nice warning system for knowing where he was in the house. She opened her trunk and hung up the muggle clothes that she had in the wardrobe, put her toiletries in the drawer, and got out her stuffed bunny and the two-way book that connected her with Hermione and sat down on the bed.
Professor Snape's house wasn't as nice as the Dursley's house was, at least not on the surface, but Rachel thought she would have a much better summer here than she would have if she'd gone back to the Dursleys. She had her own bedroom, Professor Snape had said he would buy her some books, she would get food to eat, and she could practice magic.
They'd gotten letters that said they weren't allowed to do magic over the summer holidays because of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery. However, Professor Snape had told her that he had gotten her a tutors exemption, meaning that she was practicing magic under the guidance of a licensed educator - in this case, Professor Snape himself. That meant she was allowed to practice magic during the summer as long as it wasn't around any muggles. Hermione had been very jealous when she'd found out.
It was all well and good to have a tutors exemption, but she had yet to actually do any magic. She had started doing what her therapist Torey had suggested and closing her eyes while she mouthed the incantations, but she hadn't been able to say any of them out loud yet.
However, she'd been practicing another thing Torey had taught her - holding her mouth in the shape of different letters of the alphabet and blowing out air - and she had made some soft sounds and could do so consistently. It was a little embarrassing, but she understood the idea. If she could make the sounds of the letters, then maybe she'd be able to string them together into words.
In any case, she had lots of things to do over the summer. She could practice speaking, eventually practice magic, write letters to her friends, and read a lot of books.
She decided to go downstairs, after securing her stuffed bunny in its place on the pillow, and read the titles of books of the shelves until Professor Snape was ready to go to the store.
They'd been at the house for three days now and the situation was untenable.
Severus had never expected to raise a child at Spinner's End. In fact, he'd never expected to raise a child at all. A number of things had contributed to that expectation. His heart had been broken when Lily had stopped speaking to him, and once again when she had died. By that point he had been deeply entrenched in the war and his role as a spy had isolated him from the companionship of others. Shortly after he started teaching, he had realized that he did not like young children all that much and he had no desire to repeat his childhood by marrying and having a child of his own.
After spending Christmas with Rachel, he had thought that it would work to bring her to Spinner's End to stay during the summer holidays. After all, his quarters weren't that much bigger than Spinner's End and Rachel was quiet and well-behaved.
What he hadn't taken into account was how it would feel to return to his childhood home in the company of a child. He hadn't imagined cooking in the kitchen and waiting while Rachel silently peered in on him, or reading in the sitting room while his ghost of a child slipped down the stairs.
He hadn't been ready for how many memories it would bring up. He could remember slipping silently through the house, hyper aware of which of the stairs creaked. His eyes had been watchful like Rachel's and his steps as cautious.
Maybe if Rachel had been loud or rambunctious it would have been easier, but as it was he half felt like he was going to walk into his father when he opened the door to the sitting room.
It didn't help that it quickly became obvious that this was no place to raise a child. In the years that had passed since his childhood, Cokeworth had become dingier and more desperate. When he'd passed by the park where he used to go with Lily he found that it was in shambles and there was evidence that drug users went there frequently. He didn't dare let Rachel out on her own and the yard was barely habitable.
Rachel hadn't seemed bothered by any of it. She spent her time reading books and writing with Hermione in her two-way book. She'd also helped him clean up the kitchen after meals and wash dishes, though he'd shooed her away when she'd written him a note offering to cook.
Spinner's End had always served him well in the past. He'd used it as a place to meet with Death Eaters, both during the war and more recently, and he had used it as a place to be away from Hogwarts during the summer, though he flooed back regularly to work in his private potions laboratory. Now, it seemed he needed to consider making a change - if not for Rachel's well-being, for his own.
He had saved up enough from his eleven years teaching at Hogwarts to find a new place to live, though it would make sense to still allow people to believe he lived here at Spinner's End. In general his expenses were very few. Surely he could afford an out of the way cottage or farmhouse that he could ward extensively. It would make sense to hide Rachel away there. She'd be safer. They'd both be safer.
In the meantime, they couldn't stay here. They would have to return to Hogwarts while they searched for a place to live. It was early enough in the summer that Albus should still be in residence, and he had few enough qualms about Severus visiting the castle to work during the summer.
Decision made, Severus stepped into the kitchen and began to prepare supper. Fortunately they had just enough food to last for tonight and breakfast in the morning. That would make packing simpler. He put together the remains of the chicken and roast potatoes that they'd had the night before and set them in the oven to heat up.
Rachel peeked in, the door squeaking ever so slightly as she opened it.
"Supper will be ready in about twenty minutes," Severus said.
Rachel pointed to the sink and then slipped by him to pick up a glass and fill it with water.
"You should pack your trunk tonight, we're going to go back to Hogwarts for a time," Severus said.
Rachel finished drinking her water and then washed and dried the glass. Then she went over to the table and pulled out one of the slips of parchment and the quill she'd taken to carrying with her. 'What's happening at Hogwarts?'
"Nothing is happening at Hogwarts," he answered. "However, I've decided that this isn't the best living environment for you. I'll be searching for somewhere else for us to live."
She seemed to consider this for a moment and then bent back down to write on another slip of parchment. 'You're taking me with you?'
Severus restrained himself from sighing and reminded himself that Rachel was still learning what it meant to have an adequate guardian. "Yes, you will be going with me."
Rachel nodded and then wrote on the back of that slip. 'Do you need any help preparing dinner?'
"I am a Potions Master. I do not need help with preparing a simple meal, but thank you for the offer. Go on for now, I'll call you when the food is ready," Severus said.
She collected her parchment and left just as quietly as she'd entered.
Severus gave into the urge to sigh and then checked on the food in the oven. It would not do to say he could cook a meal and then burn the food.
They returned to Hogwarts on Friday, having spent four nights at Spinner's End. Rachel still wasn't sure why they had returned to Hogwarts. Professor Snape had said something about appropriate living environments, but Rachel had thought the house had been just fine.
Professor Snape had unshrunk her trunk in her room and Rachel had just finished hanging up her clothes again and placing her stuffed bunny on her bed. She went back out into the main room and found Professor Snape looking through some pieces of parchment while standing at the table.
The flames in the fireplace grew larger and Professor Dumbledore's voice came through clearly. "Severus, is everything alright?"
"Just fine, Albus," Professor Snape said, putting down his papers and walking over to the fireplace. "Rachel and I have returned to Hogwarts for a time while I make more suitable living arrangements for us. I trust that won't be a problem?"
"Not a problem at all. Come dine with us for lunch. The House Elves are making a souffle," Professor Dumbledore said.
"We'll be there," Professor Snape said, returning to his parchments. The flames returned to their usual state after another moment.
Rachel pulled out one of her pieces of parchment and a quill and used the small table next to Professor Snape's armchair to write a quick question. 'Can I go flying?' She carefully made her way to his side, not wanting to interrupt him.
"Yes?" he asked, and Rachel handed him the parchment. "Yes, go. Be in the Great Hall at lunch time."
Rachel nodded and then hurried through the permeable wall, through Professor Snape's office, and out into the corridor. Even though she hadn't really minded Professor Snape's house, she had missed being able to go outside and she'd missed flying.
She spent two hours flying through the hoops, racing around the Quidditch pitch, practicing ascending and descending rapidly, and trying to work up the nerve to try a vertical loop. After making a quick ascent a few times and then leaning back, she decided she was going to wait until Draco was around before she tried that particular maneuver. That way he could take her to Madam Pomfrey if she fell from her broom.
She was out of breath when she made it to the Great Hall just in time for the food to pop onto the serving plates. Only the staff table was set, so she made her way up and went to a chair next to Professor Snape. Professor Dumbledore was there, as was Madam Pince, Madam Pomfrey, Hagrid, Mr. Filch, and Professor Trelawney.
Professor Trelawney adjusted her large glasses and gasped.
"Do not predict Miss Snow's death, Sybill," Professor Snape said firmly.
"I only tell what I see, no matter how tragic," Professor Trelawney said. "It is my duty as a Seer to forewarn."
Rachel glanced curiously at Professor Trelawney. She knew that she taught Divination, but other than that she didn't know anything about her. Professor Trelawney rarely came down for mealtimes.
"In this instance, you must keep what you see to yourself. I will not have you frightening an eleven year old child with visions of her death," Professor Snape said, sending Professor Trelawney a harsh look.
Professor Trelawney sank back into her chair. "Perhaps you are right. Perhaps she is still too young. However, if she would like, I would be happy to read her palm."
Rachel put down the serving spoon she'd been using to put souffle on her plate and slipped both of her hands beneath her thighs. She didn't want her death foretold.
"No, her future will remain unseen," Professor Snape said.
"A pity," Professor Trelawney said, so quietly that she could barely be heard. "Out of all people, her future is of the most importance."
"Now, now," Professor Dumbledore said. "Let's leave divination to the classroom. Severus, how did you and Rachel fare without the House Elves?"
"We are quite capable of taking care of ourselves without the House Elves," Professor Snape replied.
"Rachel, is Severus a good cook?" Professor Dumbledore asked.
Rachel freed up her hands to write. 'Professor Snape cooks well.' She passed the parchment to Professor Snape, who gave it to Professor Dumbledore.
Professor Dumbledore chuckled. "It seems you have won Rachel's loyalty already."
"Perhaps I am simply a good cook," Professor Snape said.
Rachel started to eat her slice of souffle. Professor Snape's cooking had been fine, but the House Elves were definitely better cooks.
A lone owl flew over to the staff table carrying a package and landed in front of Rachel.
Rachel carefully untied the brown paper package from the owl's leg and offered it her hand. It hooted and she gently scratched around where she thought its ears might be. After a few moments of scratching, she picked up a piece of her souffle and offered it to the owl, who snapped it up in its beak and then flew away.
"Are you considering taking Care of Magical Creatures when you start third year? I think it would be a class you would enjoy," Professor Dumbledore said.
Rachel nodded eagerly. As soon as she'd heard that it was one of the possible electives they could take she'd wished they could take it sooner.
"Perhaps Severus could be convinced to get you a pet," Professor Dumbledore continued.
"Albus," Professor Snape said, a warning in his tone.
"A pygmy puff, perhaps, if you don't want anything that could cause mischief," Professor Dumbledore suggested.
"Albus, do not get Rachel a pet," Professor Snape said.
Rachel could see the muscles working in Professor Snape's jaw and decided not to broach the subject of a pet with him. Clearly he did not want to have one.
"I'm not saying I would get her a pet, I'm saying you should think about it," Professor Dumbledore said, his tone perfectly cheerful.
Professor Snape only responded by continuing to eat his food.
Rachel finished eating and quickly unwrapped the package. Inside she found a hardback book with a purple cover. She opened it and found a message already inside in Hermione's handwriting.
'Hello everyone and happy summer holidays. I sent each member of our study group one of these two-way books (well, five-way now) and they're connected by the Protean Charm. Whatever you write in your book will show up in all the other connected books. This way we can communicate without constantly having to send letters. I thought this would be a helpful way for all of us to stay in touch and share any interesting information we come across during the summer. We can also use them during the school year to keep a master set of notes and research. Each book looks different so they won't be easily identifiable as being connected. Enjoy!'
'Thank you, Hermione. You're a lifesaver,' was written beneath in Theo's handwriting.
Rachel pulled out her quill and wrote 'Thank you very much, Hermione! This will work great. I'm back at Hogwarts for the time being.'
"A two-way book?" Professor Dumbledore asked as he stood up.
Rachel nodded.
"I remember those being quite the fashion when I was a student. It's good to know some things never fall out of style," Professor Dumbledore said, patting the back of Rachel's chair as he passed by.
Rachel got another scrap of parchment out of her pocket and quickly wrote 'Is it alright if I use the library while I'm here?' and brought it to Madam Pince, who had finished her meal and was standing up as well.
"That's fine. Just put the books back where they were originally shelved and don't take them from the castle," Madam Pince said, nodding her head. "I know you're one of the responsible ones. I never have to chase after you for an overdue book."
Rachel wrote another note, this one to Professor Snape. 'Is it alright if I go to the library?'
"Yes, be back in our quarters before dinner. We'll eat downstairs," Professor Snape said.
Rachel nodded and then ventured off to the library. At least she'd have plenty to read.
They settled into a routine over the next few days. They had breakfast in their quarters, and then Rachel would go off to the library or go out flying. Then they had lunch in the Great Hall with the handful of the staff who had remained at Hogwarts over the summer, and then Rachel went back out again, sometimes returning to the library and sometimes exploring the castle. She used some of this time alone to practice the things Torey had told her to practice. They had dinner in their quarters and then Rachel sat on the couch and read books from the library and wrote in her two-way book.
On Monday, Professor Snape received a letter while they were at lunch, which he read and promptly tucked away in a pocket within his robes.
When Rachel got up to go back out into the castle, Professor Snape stood up as well.
"Rachel, if you could come back to our rooms for a little bit," he said.
Rachel nodded, curious but not too wary. She hadn't been getting into any trouble so she didn't think he was upset with her.
They went back to their quarters and Rachel sat down on the couch while Professor Snape settled into his armchair.
He pulled the letter he'd received out and opened it again. "Lucius Malfoy, Draco's father, has requested that you attend Draco's birthday party this upcoming Saturday," he explained.
Rachel smiled. She'd never been invited to a birthday party before. She hadn't realized that Draco considered her a close enough friend to invite her either. She pulled out a scrap of parchment and quickly wrote a note and brought it to Professor Snape. 'I thought Draco's birthday had already passed? His mom sent a box of sweets that he shared with all of us.'
Professor Snape nodded. "Yes, his birthday was at the start of June. However, since he was at school on his birthday, they are now hosting the party in the summer. I don't believe we can decline the invitation, however, there are things you must know before we attend."
She stared in confusion. Professor Snape sounded awfully grim about attending a birthday party.
"Do you remember the conversation we had about Death Eaters?" he asked.
Rachel nodded warily.
"And you recall that I used to be a Death Eater?" he pressed.
Rachel nodded again. She suddenly had a bad feeling about where this was going.
"When I defected from the Death Eaters, I became a spy. The Dark Lord and the Death Eaters believed I was spying on Albus for them, and they still believe this," Professor Snape started.
'When in reality you were spying on the Dark Lord for Professor Dumbledore, and he knew you were pretending to spy on him?' Rachel wrote.
"Exactly. In the years since the Dark Lord's fall, I have kept in contact with the Death Eaters at Albus' recommendation. We figured that they would be the most likely to first hear of any signs of the Dark Lord returning," he explained.
'So Draco's father is a Death Eater?' Rachel wrote, thinking that it made sense. Draco had some pretty extreme views on blood purity.
"Yes, though it's a well kept secret. When the Dark Lord disappeared, Lucius, among others, pleaded that he'd been under the Imperius Curse and was being forced to act by the Dark Lord. He had enough influence within the Ministry that his defense worked. He avoided being sentenced to Azkaban. There are a number of your classmates who have parents with similar stories," Professor Snape said, his expression grim.
'Theo said his father would be upset if he knew he was friends with me and Hermione,' Rachel wrote.
"Yes, Ignatius Nott is a Death Eater as well," he said with a nod. "I expect that Theodore and his father will be at this birthday party as well. You should act as though you know Theodore, but aren't friends with him. Be polite, but not familiar. Take your cues from the other children at the party."
Rachel thought about that and decided she would have to write Theo in advance so he knew why she wasn't being friendly, though she knew he'd understand and probably suggest it to her first. 'Are all the adults at this party going to be Death Eaters?'
"Yes, many of them will be Death Eaters, and the ones who aren't will have worked for the Dark Lord's agenda. These parties are a way for them to gather without suspicion and to further the indoctrination of their children. Under other circumstances I would politely decline this invitation, but it's important to maintain appearances that I am still one of them. There are a few things you need to be aware of while we're at the Malfoy Manor," he said.
Rachel nodded to show she was ready.
"Do not allow any of the adults there to get you alone. If one of them asks you to go somewhere with them, even if it's just to another room, come find me. I'll make sure to be in a place that is readily visible and available to you. Do you understand?" Professor Snape asked.
Rachel nodded. 'If one of them asks me to go with them, I'll shake my head and go to where you are,' she wrote out.
"Good. I don't believe you are in direct danger from anyone who will be there, but it's important we don't give them the opportunity either. The same thing goes if one of the children asks you to go somewhere alone with them. They may be acting on instructions from their parents. Stay with the group. If anything seems at all odd or suspicious to you, come to me," he instructed.
Rachel nodded again, now feeling a little apprehensive. This was feeling less and less like a birthday party and more like some undercover mission in one of the shows Dudley used to watch on the tv.
"In general, stay with the group. I will be with the other parents, but I will keep my eye on you as much as possible. Like I said, I don't believe anything will happen, but it's best to be prepared. I believe you have some Owl Order catalogues?" he asked.
Rachel nodded. She'd gotten several over the Christmas holiday.
"Why don't you pick out a gift for Draco and I will order it," he said. "Do you have any questions for me?"
Rachel thought about it and then shook her head. She knew to be cautious, that was enough for now.
"I will reply to the Malfoys and let them know we will be attending. You can go back out into the castle if you wish, just be back in time for dinner," Professor Snape said.
Rachel nodded and then went to her room to pick out Draco a gift. She had a catalogue from Quality Quidditch Supplies and thought that something from there would be perfect since Draco was looking forward to trying out for the House team.
"Ah, Rachel. Just who I was looking for," Professor Dumbledore said as Rachel approached the staff table for lunch. She'd been busy flying around the grounds and had realized she was late when she heard the bells chiming that it was noon. She really needed a watch.
She paused in front of Professor Dumbledore, glancing briefly to Professor Snape.
"Your end of term grades," Professor Dumbledore said, handing Rachel a letter. "Usually I would be sending this to your guardian, but he is already aware of your grades and there's no need to send them by owl since you're here in the castle."
Rachel nodded and looked down at the letter with the Hogwarts seal. She had thought she'd done well in most of her classes, but now she was second guessing herself. Did she really want to know?
"Come eat lunch," Professor Snape said, looking pointedly at the chair next to him.
Relieved that she wasn't going to have to open her grades in front of people, Rachel hurried over to the chair and began serving herself some roast beef and potatoes.
"And a vegetable," he said, when Rachel went to pick up her fork.
Rachel made sure she was looking away from Professor Snape as she rolled her eyes and quickly added a serving of mixed peas and carrots to her plate.
"You're so paternal, Severus. I never would have guessed," Madam Pince said from where she sat on Professor Dumbledore's other side.
"Severus is very caring toward his students, as long as they're not boiling over cauldrons in his classroom," Madam Pomfrey added.
Rachel glanced at Professor Snape and found that he was staring at his plate with grim determination. She looked at Hagrid, who was sitting a few chairs down on Rachel's other side, and he smiled and winked at her.
"Yes, well, I knew that Severus would take good care of his students. That's why I made him Head of Slytherin House," Professor Dumbledore said.
Professor Snape sighed. "Perhaps we could desist in talking as though I weren't in the room?"
"It's a compliment, Severus," Madam Pince said. "I wish all students were as careful with the books as Rachel is. You're obviously a good influence on her."
Rachel looked at Professor Snape again and found him looking back at her with a frustrated expression on his face. She didn't feel that Professor Snape had influenced the way she treated books, and she thought he found it as absurd as she did.
Fortunately the conversation veered off into discussion of a recent vote of the Wizengamot and Rachel and Professor Snape were allowed to eat in peace.
After lunch she followed Professor Snape back down to his quarters. She was about to go into her room when Professor Snape spoke.
"Why don't you open your grades?" he suggested.
Rachel had been about to do just that, but it was clear he wanted her to do so in his presence. She braced herself and peeled back the seal keeping the letter closed. She quickly read through the short paragraph at the top, which indicated that below was the student's grades and class ranking for the 1991-1992 school year, and a reminder that students were not allowed to use magic over the holidays.
Then she read her grades. She'd received Outstanding in all of her classes except for Charms and Transfiguration, for which she had received the failing grade of Poor. She was ranked as seventh in her class.
Even though she knew she wouldn't be allowed to pass Charms and Transfiguration it still was a little depressing to see on paper. She held the letter out to Professor Snape, who waved it back at her.
"I have already seen your results. You did very well both in classes and on your exams, which is why you've ranked so highly despite your final grades in Charms and Transfiguration. You'll be allowed to retake the practical exams for those classes when you feel you're ready," he said.
Rachel nodded and bit her lower lip. She'd been using her study group's room to practice, but she still hadn't managed to say anything or cast any magic. The only real progress she'd made was making the sounds of the alphabet a little louder.
Professor Snape seemed to know what her concerns were. "Don't stress yourself about it. You're still going to be seeing Torey over the summer and you have time. I am very pleased with your grades."
Rachel nodded, though she wondered if that was really true. He was a professor and she had failed two subjects.
"Are you going back out into the castle?" he asked.
Rachel nodded again. She wanted to spend more time practicing and spend some time in the library.
"Alright. I'm stepping out of the castle for a few hours. If you need anything while I'm gone, go to Poppy in the hospital wing. I'll see you here for dinner," he said.
She nodded once more and then went into her room to collect her two-way book. She made her way up to their study room and settled into one of the chairs by the fireplace.
'I received my grades today. Anyone else?' was written at the top of the next page in Hermione's handwriting.
'All Outstandings. I was ranked second in our class. I assume you were first?' Theo had written directly beneath.
'Yes, first in class and all Outstandings,' Hermione had written back.
'Ninth in class and all Os and Es,' Millie had written beneath Hermione's response.
'Tenth in class, all Os and Es except for Potions, which was an A. My Gran was so thrilled she agreed to buy me a new wand like Professor Flitwick suggested,' Neville had written.
Rachel bit her lip again. She knew that they already knew she had failed two of her classes, but it still took her two tries to write it out. 'Seventh in class. All Os except for Ps in Charms and Transfiguration.'
'Our study group took five of the top ten slots! Congratulations on the wand, Neville. I think that will help a lot,' Hermione wrote out while Rachel was watching.
'And not a Ravenclaw in sight,' Theo added.
Rachel exhaled in relief. She was glad they weren't making a big deal out of the fact that she had failed two classes. She left the book open to see if anyone was writing anything new and drew her mouth back to make an 'A' sound. She felt ridiculous, but she had to keep trying.