Uploaded 8 July 2019
Early Fifth Year. About to get caught by Filch after sneaking Murtlap from the Infirmary, Harry and Hermione dive into the closest open door to hide… which just happens to be the staff lounge… during a staff meeting. Who knew their professors were so … relatable?
Just a humorous little thought I had. As usual, unedited or proofread, just written and posted. I also disclaim to own nothing.
-/-
"Bloody fu-"
The curse is cut off by Hermione's hand coming to block his mouth, and Harry gives her a look of confused irritation underneath the invisibility cloak as she guides them against the wall.
Filch and Missus Norris had been hot on their tracks that night, and they had snuck quickly into a doorway off the side and ended up tripping behind a tapestry of one of the many secret passageways.
"Where are we?" whispers Harry, looking around the room. It holds a large round table in the center, and various arm chairs scattered around the room. The walls were entirely filled with bookcases to the ceiling, but for the wall opposite the door that had a large stone fireplace. The ceilings were at least three stories, with a ladder on rails for each wall to reach the higher books.
"I don't know," Hermione murmurs back, pulling out the Marauder's Map and muttering the passphrase. She curses softly, getting a stunned look from Harry. She points a finger at their location on the map just as the door opened again.
Staff Lounge.
They freeze underneath the cloak, and Harry did not think his heart had ever raced so fast as he caught sight of the four Heads of House entering.
"Alright, fifteen minutes until the rest show up," Professor Sprout declares, slouching into a cheery Hufflepuff themed seat. Professor McGonagall sits beside her in the Gryfindor seat, followed by Professor Snape and Professor Flitwick. "What will the rules be for tonight?"
"I suggest 'My Dear' or 'My Boy'," Professor Flitwick pipes as Professor Snape reaches for a teapot and four cups that appeared in front of them, identical trays appearing around the table for every four seats. The potions professor takes a flask from his robe and liberally adds the content to the teapot before pouring a cup for each of them.
"You looking to get drunk tonight, Filius?" Professor Sprout comments, sniffing her tea and tasting a sip. "You as well, Severus? If I am not mistaken, this is a goblin whiskey."
Professor Flitwick hums after taking a taste himself. "You would be right. A rather strong one at that."
"Fire whiskey would not cut it tonight," Professor Snape admits silkily.
"I say, if the toad clears her throat," Professor McGonagall suggests getting back on topic. She takes a sip herself and looks over at the potion master appreciatively. "Good choice, Severus."
"I've been saving it for a particularly special occasion," Professor Snape comments. "Should we stick with the old coot and the toad tonight?"
"I was actually going to suggest 'Spirits', as well, from Trelawney," Professor McGonagall states, getting a chuckle from the others. "But, perhaps I could suggest 'Minister' instead, to stick with the theme."
"Alright, that is two for her, how about another for Albus?" Professor Flitwick looks over at Professor Sprout. "Pomona?"
"Oh, what the hell, if we are looking to get sloshed, why not just add 'Potter' to it," Sprout states, throwing up her hands a bit.
Harry is a bit startled, wide eyed as he exchanges a glance with Hermione.
"We haven't used that in a while," Professor Snape says with a nod. "Alright, the phrases for tonight are 'My dear/boy', 'Uh hem', 'Minister', and 'Potter'… We might need to refill the pot halfway through."
"Am I hearing this right?" whispers Harry in Hermione's ear. She nods.
"You're part of a drinking game," Hermione confirms in disbelief.
"Almost forgot," Professor Snape states suddenly, pulling three vials from his robe and passing them to the others. "Before you go to bed if you don't want a hangover in the morning."
"You're an angel, Severus," swears Professor Sprout, tucking the vial away.
"You know, I believe if you actually published that creation, you wouldn't have to work a day in your life again," Professor Flitwick tacks on appreciatively.
"Maybe one day. It can be misused too easily though. Some idiot student would probably take it, then drink more alcohol and end up in the hospital from alcohol poisoning," Professor Snape gives the scenario.
"True enough," agrees Professor McGonagall, both Professor Sprout and Professor Flitwick nodding along. She clears her throat, pulling a journal as well as a quill and inkpot out, the others following her lead. "Alright then." She taps her wand to the journal. "Activate."
The others quickly repeat her actions, opening the journals and activating. Each professor had his or her own house colored ink – green, blue, black, and red.
"Four way journals, the protein charm," mutters Hermione in realization as she recognizes each journal having the same four colors inside. "They are communicating with each other during the meeting."
Before Harry could ask a question, the door opens.
-/-
Anyways, not sure if I will continue this, so let me know if you want to see more and if there are any ideas. If someone wants to take their own swing at it, please leave a review, so I can read it.